Because almost nobody in Westminster, whether they’re politicians or the media, ever pays any attention to anything outside SW1A, Alex Salmond’s comment in London yesterday that the SNP would vote against any Tory government in the event of a hung Parliament – which to any Scottish person was news as surprising as a weather forecast for rain – has been greeted with seemingly-genuine shock and horror.
Reporter after reporter has treated the non-revelations (which have been official SNP policy for as long as we can remember, and were stated explicitly by Nicola Sturgeon in November) as a stunning bolt from the blue, and Tory politicians and the right-wing media alike have burst into frothing, spluttering rage, based on the fact that apparently none of them grasps how either the UK electoral system or basic arithmetic work.
We’ve had to illustrate this piece with a tweet from our old chum Duncan Hothersall, because at the time of writing the Scottish Labour account on Twitter has no mention of Labour’s “five point plan”, and nor does the branch office’s website.
And the reason for the absence of any more information is probably that the “plan” is another example of a Labour policy that looks like a tasty boiled egg until you crack its shell and discover that there’s nothing inside.
Respect to John MacKay of STV, who on last night’s Scotland Tonight asked Labour MSP James Kelly the question this site has called for about whether Labour would stand aside and let the Tories rule if the latter were the largest party after May’s election, but Labour had enough seats to win a confidence vote and form the government with backing from the SNP and/or other parties.
Kelly, unsurprisingly, flapped and blustered and totally evaded it. But then we doubt he has the authority to make the tea in Scottish Labour, let alone speak for the party on key policy issues. If the question isn’t put repeatedly by all of the media to more senior Labour figures until an answer is produced, we’ll be wanting to know why.
Here’s Ed Miliband, giving a speech this morning to literally at least 20 Labour MPs, Labour MSPs, journalists and possibly a stray member of the public who accidentally walked through the wrong door in Clydebank, a place where Labour leaders used to address gatherings of thousands.
Unusually, Miliband took a few questions from the hacks, all of whom promptly wasted the opportunity by lobbing completely pointless softballs about coalitions and deals, all of which (a) have been asked a hundred times already, (b) were rendered moot by Alex Salmond on the Marr show yesterday, and (c) were only ever going to be batted away non-committally.
So here’s an actually worthwhile one they can ask instead next time.
We have to give Jim Murphy credit – on this week’s Sunday Politics he started off with the subtle, misleading but technically-accurate version of Labour’s line about the “biggest party forming the government”, which involves making the true but irrelevant observation that in the past it’s usually been the case. (Mainly because UK elections almost always give the biggest party a comfortable majority.)
But it only took a couple of minutes of questioning for the Scottish branch manager to lose his cool and resort to the comprehensively debunked flat-out lie again.
We thought you’d enjoy this clip from this morning’s Andrew Marr Show, readers. It came after a very sensible interview, in which Salmond had calmly and reasonably laid out the SNP’s view on events should there be a hung parliament this May with the former First Minister’s party holding the balance of power.
Tory minister Anna Soubry seems to be experiencing a degree of regret about having begged Scots to stay in the UK. The body language says as much as the words.
Aidan on Vibecoding A Better World: “Let me guess Alf, the plan is; A) build an enormous port in the middle of nowhere; B) watch the…” Nov 3, 13:06
Aidan on Vibecoding A Better World: “It’s a odd situation re Scottish independence, it enjoys significant support within the general population, but; – in my view…” Nov 3, 13:05
Captain Caveman on Vibecoding A Better World: “I can relate, believe me. Your principal problem is this: the Indy Movement is mainly comprised of lefties – the…” Nov 3, 12:23
Hatey McHateface on Vibecoding A Better World: “@CC We would have to study the writings of the post colonial boys and who wants to do that? My…” Nov 3, 12:01
Captain Caveman on Vibecoding A Better World: ““Every geriatric Scottish arse from John O’ Groats to Gretna going unwiped forever” Perhaps the Prof has a greater personal…” Nov 3, 11:16
Hatey McHateface on Vibecoding A Better World: “A nice photo from the hated Mail Online this morning: https://www.dailymail.com/debate/article-16259803/DANIEL-HANNAN-Picture-sums-entire-migrant-industry-regards-taxpayers-country.html Seems like some bint in the HoC announced yesterday…” Nov 3, 10:42
Hatey McHateface on Vibecoding A Better World: ““we know from postcolonial theory” Of course we do, Alf. Such a shame we still know SFA about what to…” Nov 3, 10:26
Alf Baird on Vibecoding A Better World: ““tell the current collection of clattering clownwits infesting Holyrood to not bother coming back from their holidays” The Rev makes…” Nov 3, 09:48
Hatey McHateface on Vibecoding A Better World: ““I see you’re a fan of Better Together” For myself, I’m a fan of Plausible Divorce Plan, although I do…” Nov 2, 17:39
Northcode on Vibecoding A Better World: “I think a further clarity intervention is needed about dates. James Che’s narrative blends two unrelated historical facts into a…” Nov 2, 15:53
Northcode on Vibecoding A Better World: “For even more clarity… Queen Anne’s proclamation dissolving the Scottish Parliament was issued in April 1707, not in 1752. Anne…” Nov 2, 15:16
Chas on Vibecoding A Better World: “How interesting. I have never read interpretations of 300+ year old stuff before. But only if we discount the exact…” Nov 2, 13:53
James Che on Vibecoding A Better World: “Indeed a clever attempt north code, Except England did not update its Calendar year until 1752 to be in line…” Nov 2, 13:25
Dan on Vibecoding A Better World: “@ Northcode at 11:04 am You don’t have waffle some word twisting shite on here. Over the course of the…” Nov 2, 13:03
Hatey McHateface on Vibecoding A Better World: “Cheers, sarah. There was me reading about the Scottish Men’s Curling team’s European Championship triumph on the BBC website and…” Nov 2, 12:55
sarah on Vibecoding A Better World: “Thanks for reporting this achievement. And making clear that once again the BBC has worked to hide a Scotland triumph.” Nov 2, 12:19
McDuff on Vibecoding A Better World: “Scotland’s men pick up a gold at the world curling championships and es far as I can see it has…” Nov 2, 11:13
Northcode on Vibecoding A Better World: “Alf’s argument frames Scotland’s economic condition through a mythic lens of colonial underdevelopment. In its historical and economic framing, these…” Nov 2, 11:04
Northcode on Vibecoding A Better World: “For clarity… James Che’s argument rests on a mythic moment they place in 1606, where they believe the Scottish Parliament…” Nov 2, 10:28
Alf Baird on Vibecoding A Better World: “Yes of course “a radical change in the political (and colonial) landscape” is absolutely critical for recovery and development of…” Nov 2, 10:24
Hatey McHateface on Vibecoding A Better World: “@Aidan The laughable aspect to this is that there are plenty of Scots, myself included, who would love Scotland to…” Nov 2, 10:20
Aidan on Vibecoding A Better World: “Well done Izzie, you’re exactly right. If Nicola Sturgeon had been first minister between 2014 and 2023 Scotland would be…” Nov 2, 10:15
Aidan on Vibecoding A Better World: “You are right James, when people hear about the true nature of what happened in 1606, they will take to…” Nov 2, 09:47
Aidan on Vibecoding A Better World: “So the plan is, Day 1 – become independent and Day 2 – become identical to Norway? Scotland on Day…” Nov 2, 09:41
Hatey McHateface on Vibecoding A Better World: “Awa and shite, Alf. The context is you lying about Scotland having the highest energy prices in the world. The…” Nov 2, 09:39
Alf Baird on Vibecoding A Better World: “The ‘context’ Hatey, which you completely ignore, much like your beloved ‘union’ hoax, is that Norway’s economy is so advanced…” Nov 2, 09:09
Hatey McHateface on Vibecoding A Better World: “Could be so much worse, Bob. At least she’s not claiming the route to Scottish Independence is via climbing on…” Nov 2, 09:01
Hatey McHateface on Vibecoding A Better World: “So true, James. People vowing to edumacate themselves about the shenanigans of 1707 is all I ever hear at the…” Nov 2, 08:56