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Deadpan sarcasm of the day 47

Posted on April 27, 2013 by

Emphasis, as always, is ours.

lockhart

STATEMENT BY SCOTTISH COOPERATIVE PARTY EXECUTIVE

The Scottish Co-operative Party’s 2011 manifesto is one full of co-operative and mutual solutions to the challenges faced in Scotland, issues of independence, devolution or the constitutional settlement did not feature. The annual Co-operative Party conference has passed motions which promote a view of Scotland playing a vital role in a United Kingdom.

We have noted the personal comments made by Mary Lockhart, a long serving Co-operative Party and Labour Party member. Mary has been a great advocate for co-operative and mutual solutions. Whilst we recognise that members of political parties hold differing, sometimes opposite, positions the views Mary has expressed are not shared by the Party. Mary has offered her resignation from the role of Chair of the Scottish Co-operative Party and the Scottish Executive committee has accepted this.

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Have we got friends for you 146

Posted on April 27, 2013 by

The BBC’s flagship satirical programme “Have I Got News For You” is, of course, comedy. The tone of the opening minutes of last night’s episode was a little uglier and nastier than the usual friendly inter-regional jibes (normally delivered by the likes of Jeremy Clarkson and accompanied by rebukes from the rest of the panel), but it really wasn’t anything to get overly worked up about. Comedy isn’t always cuddly.

hignfy1

It must have been a little uncomfortable for the No camp, though.

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Fear over pension fearbomb feared 163

Posted on April 26, 2013 by

Hang on. The heart of the latest No campaign/media scare story is that the enormous pension deficit currently looming over the UK like a great big multi-billion-pound fiscal sword of Damocles (but which everyone is feverishly avoiding looking at) will become much more urgent in the event of Scottish independence, because according to EU rules “cross-border” pensions can’t just boot the problem into the long grass for years, and have to ensure any shortfall is funded immediately.

thefear

EU rules? But haven’t the Unionists spent most of the last six months telling us that an independent Scotland wouldn’t be an EU member, and would have to wait years at the back of the queue to join as a new country? Phew! Problem solved!

There goes the fear 65

Posted on April 25, 2013 by

We’re indebted to an alert reader (as previously noted, we default to not naming people who send us tip-offs and the like so as not to get them in trouble at work or anything, but will happily credit you if you ask) for an excellent piece of initiative today.

“16 April 2013

Dear Ministry of Defence,

A couple of weeks ago the PM told us we were at threat of nuclear attack by North Korea. Living in Glasgow, what is the procedure if they do launch, where do I go? How do the MOD protect us – can they shoot the missile down? How will I know we are under attack? If they do launch, Trident isn’t much use, is it? Can Trident shoot down a missile? The South Koreans have Patriot missiles, do we? Are they any good? What are you doing to protect Glasgow?

Yours faithfully and very concerned,
[alert WingsLand reader]”

You can read the MoD’s reply below. Our emphases, as always.

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The clear blue waters of the Clyde 189

Posted on April 24, 2013 by

Much as we like to mock Scottish Labour for their deep-seated terror of stating a firm policy position on any subject whatsoever (other than “SNP BAD”, of course), we have to give credit where it’s due. Last weekend, Johann Lamont finally comprehensively addressed a subject she’s been ducking since before this website even existed.

lamontbbc5

Under the inquisitorial gaze of the BBC’s remorseless Brian Taylor, Lamont bit the bullet and laid out her position once and for all, in simple plain-speaking terms, on Britain’s nuclear deterrent. The BBC website is a little bit flaky with video, so we’ve transcribed the six-minute exchange for you below. Let that be an end to the matter.

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Forbidden fruit 36

Posted on April 24, 2013 by

It’s funny what you find when you’re not looking for it. As a result of a piece we wrote yesterday, we found ourselves tracking back through some older posts to check a couple of facts, and stumbled across something quite interesting.

ffruit

Within certain limited parameters of “interesting”, of course.

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How’s that working out for you? 75

Posted on April 23, 2013 by

The Scotsman reports today the less-than-astonishing news that the Orange Order plans to take the (Ulster Says) No side in the independence debate, lining up with such other lovely “Better Together” bedfellows as the BNP, National Front and UKIP in a coalition of all the most likeable aspects of Britishness.

delmontae

In the light of this exciting and important development, we couldn’t help but wonder how their last attempt at influencing Scottish politics had gone.

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Are you ready to be heartbroken? 98

Posted on April 23, 2013 by

An alert reader pointed us this morning to an Ipsos Mori poll from last week that seemed to escape most of the media’s attention. As well as mirroring numerous recent surveys showing Labour’s lead over the Conservatives collapsing, it asked a rather more specific question.

edmilibandconf3

Long-time readers may recall a piece this site wrote back in September 2012 about the “Kinnock Factor”, a well-documented phenomenon in British politics by which the electorate, when it comes to the crunch of a general election, invariably rejects parties whose leaders it doesn’t like – even if the party itself is well ahead in the polls.

And in that context, Ipsos had nothing but bad news for Ed Miliband.

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A definitive position 40

Posted on April 23, 2013 by

Here’s some more from Johann Lamont’s recent BBC interview (18m 20s).

lamontbbc2

BRIAN TAYLOR: Will a Labour government repeal the bedroom tax?

JOHANN LAMONT: Well, what we’ve been very clear about is that this is, em, deeply damaging to very many families. I’ve had examples of young people with learning disabilities living in supported accommodation who are now paying more. That is simply unacceptable.

As answers go we suppose it’s not exactly “Yes” or “No”, but it definitely sounds like we’ve got a firm and specific commitment coming up any second now, readers!

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From the cradle to the grave 42

Posted on April 23, 2013 by

Johann Lamont, interviewed on the BBC last weekend:

lamontbbc

“You can understand the desirability of people having access to medicines, but everybody knows there are tough choices being made now.” (10m 19s)

That’s the “leader of the Labour Party in Scotland”, there, seemingly equivocal on the principle of “people having access to medicines”. Nye Bevin must be proud.

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Recycle, repackage, repeat 112

Posted on April 23, 2013 by

It would appear that we’ve reached the point where the anti-independence campaign has officially run out of arguments, and is being forced to reissue its Greatest Hits.

scotsmanbanknotes

The headline on the left is from January 2012, the one on the right is yesterday’s.

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Physician, heal thyself 72

Posted on April 22, 2013 by

We have a fun task for Scottish Labour’s exciting new “Truth Team”, which made its debut last week. Clearly it would be rather unseemly to go around proclaiming yourself an arbiter of truth if there was a great big lie at the heart of your very existence, so hopefully someone on the Team will be able to explain the curious and seemingly untrue assertion that still heads up Scottish Labour’s own Twitter account.

johannlamontconf27

We highlighted it yesterday for fun, but it’s worth serious examination too.

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