In amongst a torrent of pretty mad analysis of the election result at the weekend, we noticed the most insane reason yet suggested for the loss of the SNP’s majority:
The co-founder of a much-lauded but little-read pro-independence website asserted that the SNP were cruising to victory until the Nats got the backing of the Scottish Sun and Nicola Sturgeon was pictured posing with the front cover endorsing her party.
The whole litany of gaping flaws in that argument is something the Yes movement has needed to talk about for some considerable time now. So let’s bite the bullet and do it.
We were having a quiet night in, readers. (Living in a cul-de-sac, it’s quite peaceful here in the evenings, unless we’re hosting a soirée.) We’d just made ourselves a late snack of a tasty baguette – preceded by a small apéritif, and a few canapés serving as hors d’oeuvre – as the au pair is on holiday in Paris this week with the chauffeur, taking in some haute couture.
As we relaxed on the chaise-longue, pondering an indulgent dessert of a chocolate eclair or some crème brûlée, we glanced at Twitter, in the hope of being amused by a few bon mots in the milieu of the internet. Sadly, the reality was a cliché.
Dismayingly, this magnificent piece of virtuoso television interviewing from last night’s Scotland Tonight doesn’t appear to have been recorded in full splendid isolation for posterity anywhere, so it would be a grave failure of duty on our part not to preserve it for those viewers unfortunate enough to have been otherwise engaged.
We had a little Twitter run-in last night with former Scottish Labour deputy leader and current unemployed halfwit Anas Sarwar, when he reported us to Police Scotland for making a joke about bank holiday mail deliveries, “people in England” and “especially” Scottish ones – which of course includes this site’s own editor, that being the gag.
We’d almost forgotten he existed. But the incident brought something back to mind.
To be fair to Mr Sarwar, he was at least partly right.
Here’s a column from Kenny Farquharson in today’s tablet edition of the Times, which hasn’t made it onto the website. We don’t know if it’s in the print version.
To mark the day when Scotland would have become independent had it voted Yes in 2014, the Scottish Conservatives have hired someone who sells dog food (not very successfully) for a living to produce a 37-page dossier about how absolutely dreadful Scotland is and how it would be the most bankrupt country in Europe – poorer than Greece, poorer than Latvia and poorer than Cyprus.
It wasn’t supposed to be released publicly until tomorrow, so that all the papers could splurge their loads on it, but someone found a copy that had been left on a bus and sent it to us. It’s incredibly dull, but if you really want to read it, it’s here.
Even by the low, low normal arithmetical standards of the Scottish media, yesterday’s Scottish Sunday Express humiliated itself with the most stupendously factually wrong articles we’ve seen in a newspaper for some time.
We can hardly contain our joy, gentle readers, that Scottish Labour have brought this magnificent graphic from January back again, tweeting it several times yesterday with all the mindbogglingly fat-headed flaws from two months ago still present.
But we couldn’t help being struck by this new comment about it, by the branch office’s notoriously truth-averse finance spokesclown:
Let’s walk through that one really quickly. People can’t afford to save for a deposit, because rents are so high. So rather than do anything about rents, Labour will double the zero they HAVE managed to save, boosting it all the way up to, er, zero.
Fearghas MacFhionnlaigh on Like Responsible Citizens Do: “There is very little doubt Nicola Sturgeon is protected and future-proofed by State promise. The Rev Stuart Campbell’s patiently incisive…” Sep 15, 00:02
PhilM on Like Responsible Citizens Do: “That route falls off a bit cliff like Wile E. Coyote until you see the big ‘poof!’ as private prosecution…” Sep 14, 23:47
BLMac on Like Responsible Citizens Do: “It’s good to see this being pushed if only to see some revers Karma for Scotland’s latest addition to the…” Sep 14, 23:37
robertkknight on Like Responsible Citizens Do: “Well done Rev, but given how events have unfolded over the past few years one can only conclude that Agent…” Sep 14, 22:26
Rev. Stuart Campbell on Like Responsible Citizens Do: “She knows they weren’t. He pleaded guilty. She said on the interview she knew some of them were bought with…” Sep 14, 22:05
sarah on Like Responsible Citizens Do: “Liberation Scotland will be presenting a petition to the C-24 Decolonisation Committee of the UN next month!!! This is great…” Sep 14, 22:01
sarah on Like Responsible Citizens Do: “I don’t think we need fear that the current lot of MSP/MPs will be organising the separation. They haven’t the…” Sep 14, 21:31
Fearghas MacFhionnlaigh on Like Responsible Citizens Do: “LIBERATION SCOTLAND 2026 CROWDFUNDER ANNOUNCEMENT « Dear Liberation Scotland member / Independence supporter: Liberation Scotland’s mission is to restore the…” Sep 14, 21:13
Rocky on Like Responsible Citizens Do: “You would have to get rid of all the trough-munching, incompetent managerial classes, too. They keep it all going.” Sep 14, 21:02
Mark Beggan on Like Responsible Citizens Do: “‘Goebellsian “The National” agitprop circular. It’s readers are out of this world. I think some readers are wanting for the…” Sep 14, 20:52
McDuff on Like Responsible Citizens Do: “Sorry Sarah but I disagree,the rev is right Scotland is not fit for independence at this present time. Yes the…” Sep 14, 20:50
agentx on Like Responsible Citizens Do: “Ah – OK thanks – my apologies. But I am sure that Sturgeon would entirely agree with the reasons for…” Sep 14, 20:47
Spartan 117 on Like Responsible Citizens Do: “Indeed Hatey. Bad me. Wings BTL gets all the more hysterical and surreal with every passing day.” Sep 14, 20:26
PhilM on Like Responsible Citizens Do: “Incorrect. Check again. There was about a six-month gap before she was sworn in as FM.” Sep 14, 20:18
Hatey McHateface on Like Responsible Citizens Do: “There’s no way that can happen if it hasn’t been foretold by the post colonial boys.” Sep 14, 20:16
Hatey McHateface on Like Responsible Citizens Do: “Hoho, Spartan, twathater has you bang to rights. You’ve been enabling and celebrating their corruption for far too long. High…” Sep 14, 19:46
Hatey McHateface on Like Responsible Citizens Do: “If they’re largely Muslim with a Christian minority, they give us advance warning of what Scotland will likely be in…” Sep 14, 19:39
Yorkie on Like Responsible Citizens Do: “I would imagine that Murrell had enough money of his own – from his salary etc. If she argues that…” Sep 14, 19:25
Spartan 117 on Like Responsible Citizens Do: “Ahem. I was criticising the blatant hypocrisy, not supporting Reform. I also made the point that Nigel and his TechBros…” Sep 14, 19:13
M.E on Like Responsible Citizens Do: “> “is isn’t fit for anything.” Your grammar checker ain’t isn’t is fit for anything, Stu. Also the way you…” Sep 14, 18:56
Spartan 117 on Like Responsible Citizens Do: “I think the graphic to the right of this page titled “A Tall Tale” composing a pastiche of laughable front…” Sep 14, 18:47
bumsrush on Like Responsible Citizens Do: “I admit to just a cursory reading of the Proceeds of Crimes Acts but it does appear Stu has taken…” Sep 14, 18:44
Bonzo Dogg on Like Responsible Citizens Do: “In this case a Citizen’s arrest is not appropriate, not least because you have to establish that detention is necessary…” Sep 14, 18:43
twathater on Like Responsible Citizens Do: ““The only thing that will defeat this blatant corruption will be diligent investigative journalism and holding the corrupt to account.”…” Sep 14, 18:29
agentx on Like Responsible Citizens Do: ““Why the Rule Was Changed Historically, the common law presumed that a wife was under the total coercion and control…” Sep 14, 18:19
Chas on Like Responsible Citizens Do: “Again I note that the missive is unsigned. Somebody is clearly watching their back or has been instructed!” Sep 14, 18:16
Dan on Like Responsible Citizens Do: “Well done Stuart for doing this. Though tbh I am a bit miffed nobody else had done this already after…” Sep 14, 18:02