Warning: despite the quite zingy title this is actually going to be a very dry stats post, readers. It is, on the other hand, based on a man having something disturbingly close to a complete psychotic mental breakdown, so there’s always that for a bit of colour.
Because the paragraph above, and in particular the highlighted part, is without a doubt the most dishonest, diametrically false and wildly extreme lie about Scottish politics that we’ve ever seen anyone tell in the 13.5 years of Wings Over Scotland’s existence.
And as a rule we don’t bother addressing them because they’re so demented you could spend 5,000 words pulling apart all the individual strands of lunacy every time, and lunatics thrive on attention, but this one does merit a very brief comment.
Because “Vote Labour, get indy” wasn’t our plan. It was John Swinney’s.
Even by the embarrassing standards of The National, the gulf between this morning’s blaring front-page splash and the weak, watery weasel words in the actual article is a chasm so wide and so yawning (in every sense of that word) that it would put the epic planetary scar of Mars’ Valles Marineris to shame.
Coupled with a feebly underwhelming Programme For Government (in which the main policy was the re-abolition of peak rail fares just months after the SNP insisted such a move was unaffordable, with no clue as to where the money had suddenly been found) and a pitiful list of candidates for next year’s Holyrood election featuring the likes of Sally “all aboard the gravy bus!” Donald, Kaukab “DECAPITATE TERFS” Stewart, Kirsten “DECAPITATE TERFS” Oswald, Alison “DECAPITATE TERFS” Thewliss and Alyn “throw anyone who doesn’t want to DECAPITATE TERFS out of the SNP” Smith, the story was an abject vision of a bleak future for independence.
The less said about the Scottish Government’s toe-curlingly embarrassing “summit” last week, the sooner we can all pretend it never happened. We’ve got little to add to the withering assessments of Robin McAlpine and Kevin McKenna and just about everyone else who’s bothered covering this pathetic waste of everyone involved’s time. (Not that the time of most of these useless quangocrats was worth anything anyway.)
We take a moment only to note something remarkable: the closest Scottish Labour’s hapless branch manager Anas Sarwar has ever come to understanding anything.
Yesterday the Scottish media gave Scottish Greens MSP Maggie Chapman what she’s never willingly given anyone else – a platform on which to make her case.
Most did a very poor job challenging her on her outrageous comments about the Supreme Court, with BBC Radio Scotland’s Drivetime show being an especially wretched example of allowing the interviewee to ignore every question and then just ramble on endlessly about something else entirely, but LBC’s Gina Davidson was on top of her brief and put all the points that reasonable people wanted to be made, while giving Chapman ample time to answer uninterrupted.
Let’s break down how that went, with the help of our handy Bullshit Buzzer.
We’ll be honest, readers, we gasped out loud when we saw this.
That such a basic, fundamental truth of human existence should ever be front page news with the capacity to shock 100,000 years after we invented language is a sign of just how insane our world has become since 2015.
But magnificent as it is, it’s not even today’s BEST front cover.
For those among you who don’t have the time or patience to wade through 88 pages of judicial lingo, we’ve distilled today’s Supreme Court judgment down to its key points.
Much of it, of course, can be summarised as “the bleeding obvious”.
Because you certainly are a bit light-headed if you’re buying this horse-plop.
We don’t normally spend much time analysing opinion polls more than a year out from an election because it’s a complete chump’s game – too much can happen. But this one’s so absolutely batshit mad that we couldn’t resist a bit of a probe.
Dan on Faces In Sand: ““The same people with a flourishing space program and credible plans to exploit the Moon.” Oh aye, have they fired…” Oct 24, 22:52
robertkknight on Faces In Sand: “Posted without comment… Religion: CofE: 80.6% No, 19.4% Yes” Oct 24, 22:12
Geri on Faces In Sand: “See Shit face, there exists this little thing called international treaties. Those treaties carry international clout. They’re, supposedly, upheld by…” Oct 24, 22:11
Lorncal on Faces In Sand: “Hmmmmm… You may be right, H McH. I did read somewhere that some of the masks for medical staff were…” Oct 24, 21:36
robertkknight on Faces In Sand: “2014 Referendum Study Demographics Birth place: oUK: 57.1% No, 42.9% Yes rUK: 72.1% No, 27.9% Yes SCO: 47.3% No, 52.7%…” Oct 24, 21:35
Hatey McHateface on Faces In Sand: ““the real nations are the tribes and the country boundaries reflect nothing of this” Check out the big brain on…” Oct 24, 20:14
Hatey McHateface on Faces In Sand: “Having made the bulk of the transition to renewables (which I believe Norway has), it’s foolhardy to pull up the…” Oct 24, 19:49
Hatey McHateface on Faces In Sand: ““But guess what???” Hmmm, let’s see. I guess that EU Citizens, in addition to those of the Republic of Ireland,…” Oct 24, 19:32
robertkknight on Faces In Sand: “Our learned misnomer talks about democracy. LOL. If all were fair, equal, democratic and meaningful, then EU Citizens, in addition…” Oct 24, 18:35
Luigi on Faces In Sand: “Sigh. Is it too much to ask for our aspiring politicians to take an IQ test? No need to raise…” Oct 24, 18:34
Hatey McHateface on Faces In Sand: ““you can’t go swimming until you can swim” Let’s see now. That thing you’re doing when you’re out of your…” Oct 24, 18:23
Hatey McHateface on Faces In Sand: ““the same ppl who love a Jenny” I think I get what you’re on about there, Geri. You’re insisting that…” Oct 24, 18:13
Hatey McHateface on Faces In Sand: ““Thankfully – colonialism is over” Ah, c’moan noo, Geri, ye ken that’s a fib. The coloniser in the east, the…” Oct 24, 18:02
sam on Faces In Sand: “You might read this? https://justiceactionmaribyrnong.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Contemporary-Anti-Colonial-Self-Determination-Claims-and-the-Decolonisation-of-International-Law.pdf” Oct 24, 16:37
TURABDIN on Faces In Sand: “Referenda & elections are only as good as the data fed into them, rather like AI training. Corrupted or biased…” Oct 24, 15:45
Dan on Faces In Sand: “Interesting… #Ohm’sLaw content. Noticed that Norway is currently exporting 1.45GW to UK, but UK is currently exporting 1.35GW to Denmark.…” Oct 24, 15:44
robertkknight on Faces In Sand: “Hey, Mr Misnomer… Just for you: https://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/politics/independence-referendum-figures-revealed-majority-5408163.amp” Oct 24, 14:53
Dan on Faces In Sand: “Yay, for post responding to Hatey’s brake hack released from moderation. To add a bit more info. Brake fluid has…” Oct 24, 14:26
DaveL on Faces In Sand: “‘They need to see that the institutions will function, the economy will stabilise, and the transition will be orderly.’ In…” Oct 24, 14:14
Geri on Faces In Sand: “Do they really? So a slogan on a bus & parroting ‘take back control ‘ didn’t work for Brexshit? Who…” Oct 24, 13:30
factcjecker on Faces In Sand: “Geri, I note the impeccable logic of your position. When it refers to England: “They’re hard wired racists. If “foreigners”…” Oct 24, 12:37
Geri on Faces In Sand: “That rewinding prick should be forced onto the first bus out of here. Why isn’t he? He’ll be receiving government…” Oct 24, 12:34
Northcode on Faces In Sand: “A forward-looking, inclusive case for independence can only persuade if it feels real. That means it must be grounded in…” Oct 24, 12:32
Dan on Faces In Sand: “fc says: “Thanks for the kind and polite words, Dan. That’s the way to formulate an argument.” Nae bother, treat…” Oct 24, 12:10
Northcode on Faces In Sand: “Across the world, when territories recognised by the UN as non-self-governing (NSGTs) have voted on independence, the results follow a…” Oct 24, 12:02
Geri on Faces In Sand: “15 year + is the acceptable measure by our colonising overlords. Personally I’d make it much more because they’ve already…” Oct 24, 12:00
Geri on Faces In Sand: “Dan, It’s pure projection on their part. It always is. They’re hard wired racists. If “foreigners” were allowed a vote…” Oct 24, 11:43
factchecker on Faces In Sand: ““Dan says: 24 October, 2026 at 11:02 am @ “factchecker” You can go fuck yourself with that assertion ya word…” Oct 24, 11:29
Confused on Faces In Sand: “RUPERT LOWE is out-faraging the farage – farage will deport them all, but lowe will now deport the “second generation”…” Oct 24, 11:19
Geri on Faces In Sand: “They weren’t qualified to vote. They were blow-ins, seasonal workers & second home owners & every other waif & stray…” Oct 24, 11:15