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Wings Over Scotland


Once upon a time 152

Posted on March 24, 2016 by

“Dry your eyes. On your feet.”

Sometimes the world’s random turns throw up a charmed piece of timing. That was the first tweet that I read on 19th September 2014, sitting on the side of the bed, eyes burning, wondering what on Earth I could possibly do with a day for which I’d bought champagne, but which broke my heart before dawn.

dryeyes

I’d resisted Twitter for a while, then fallen in love with it, weirdly comfortable with the disembodied voices of strangers. Small phrases, 140 characters: at its best, little postcards that made me smile, laugh or think.

For whatever reason, that tweet cut through, its arrival perfect to give me a virtual shake. I’d tell the writer – if I knew who they were – that I managed to carry out half of their instruction to us hollow-eyed, political orphans that day, though I failed miserably for a while on the first bit.

Today we should have become independent. We’re not, and it’s not okay, but since I don’t think we can ignore the power that time and timing can possess, and since words are all I’ve got, I’d like to tell you a story.

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The £5bn miracle 138

Posted on March 24, 2016 by

Two front pages in the same newspaper, two weeks apart.

miracle

The top image is Scotland within the UK. The bottom one is an independent Scotland.

£5 billion better off with independence? We’d call that a no-brainer.

The Wee Black Book 315

Posted on March 24, 2016 by

Scotland isn’t independent today.

wb2b

Let’s not get fooled again.

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The little guy 128

Posted on March 23, 2016 by

We hadn’t heard of the Joseph Rowntree Reform Trust until today. It turns out that it’s a sister organisation to the highly admirable Joseph Rowntree Foundation, which does great work highlighting and fighting issues around poverty and social injustice.

jrrt1

The Reform Trust, not so much.

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Yesterday, when they were mad 177

Posted on March 23, 2016 by

To mark the day when Scotland would have become independent had it voted Yes in 2014, the Scottish Conservatives have hired someone who sells dog food (not very successfully) for a living to produce a 37-page dossier about how absolutely dreadful Scotland is and how it would be the most bankrupt country in Europe – poorer than Greece, poorer than Latvia and poorer than Cyprus.

mentalkevgraph

It wasn’t supposed to be released publicly until tomorrow, so that all the papers could splurge their loads on it, but someone found a copy that had been left on a bus and sent it to us. It’s incredibly dull, but if you really want to read it, it’s here.

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All bad things to everyone 86

Posted on March 23, 2016 by

We’re very confused today.

mailaspiration

Okay, so that’s all straightforward enough. The SNP are bad because they’re going to hit “middle Scotland” with more tax. Bunch of dangerous tax-and-spend lefties. Right?

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A probability quiz 126

Posted on March 23, 2016 by

Q: What are the chances of us NOT having something special for you tomorrow?

A:

image

A failure to communicate 75

Posted on March 22, 2016 by

From the Scotsman tonight:

ssasscotsman

As previously, we’re having quite a lot of trouble understanding the difference between “independence” (39%), and “the Scottish Parliament should make all the decisions for Scotland” (51%). We’re going to drop the SSAS a line and see if they’ll ask for us.

Something to do 104

Posted on March 22, 2016 by

Barring some sort of unforseeable apocalypse, Scottish Labour aren’t going to win the Holyrood election in May, so it doesn’t really matter what their policy proposals are – they’re never going to happen.

Nevertheless, it’s pretty much our job to examine stuff like their plan to “scrap council tax”, and it’s more fun than watching the news today, so let’s give it a go.

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First off the mark 186

Posted on March 22, 2016 by

Brussels terror atrocity = SNP BAD.

gallagherbrussells

Chris Deerin, Iain Martin, Alan Cochrane and Ian Smart will be hopping mad.

The other kind of soaring 167

Posted on March 21, 2016 by

Even by the low, low normal arithmetical standards of the Scottish media, yesterday’s Scottish Sunday Express humiliated itself with the most stupendously factually wrong articles we’ve seen in a newspaper for some time.

expresssoar

James Kelly on Scot Goes Pop! has already eviscerated its comically inept bumbling in detail, but we thought we’d just quickly give you a visual version.

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Coming very soon 92

Posted on March 21, 2016 by

We’ve got a little surprise for you this week, readers.

weeboo

Stay tuned.

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