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As you were 103

Posted on April 01, 2023 by

Minority Report 131

Posted on March 31, 2023 by

It’s not often we have to correct the figures of an esteemed KC like Joanna Cherry, but she’s made a straight-up mistake in her column for The National today.

Because of course Ash Regan and Kate Forbes did rather better than that.

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Before the storm 394

Posted on March 29, 2023 by

To be honest, Humza Yousaf’s new Cabinet satirises itself – everyone’s picking on the absurdity of noted idiot Shona Robison becoming Finance Secretary but the funniest is surely omnifailure Shirley-Anne Somerville as Trans Rights – sorry, “Social Justice” Secretary – so rather than waste our breath on it today we’re going to catch up on some results from our latest Panelbase poll that we haven’t managed to squeeze in amid the mayhem of the last couple of weeks.

They tell us some interesting things about the Scotland the new FM now leads.

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Better living through higher prices 331

Posted on March 28, 2023 by

Well, we’re off to a flying start.

This is certainly what the public want. So let’s see his plans.

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The beginning of the end 361

Posted on March 27, 2023 by

The beam on Kate Forbes’ face was quite something.

She’d clearly been exhausted by the contest some time ago, and must have been dreading winning and having to continue fighting the assault from within her own party. Her evident delight and relief at her own failure was a revealing moment.

The great unknown in this election was just who the SNP membership was. No poll could tell us, and with over 50,000 people having quit the party in the last three years, nobody knew who was left. But we know now: idiots.

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Empty Space 204

Posted on March 25, 2023 by

Humza’s Sneaky Peek 85

Posted on March 24, 2023 by

Wait what now?


And how would he know that, exactly?

Spinning the wheel 439

Posted on March 22, 2023 by

We’ve been thinking about it since last night, and we’re not sure if Humza Yousaf now still has ANY of the policies he started the leadership election with.

But this one‘s got us extra-specially perplexed, since at the start it was pretty much the main unique selling point he was hanging his whole campaign on.

Maybe you can help us out, readers.

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Fantasy Island 202

Posted on March 21, 2023 by

We can’t even satirise this stuff.

We might have a day off.

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The Final Insult 183

Posted on March 20, 2023 by

According to SNP President and acting CEO Mike Russell, SNP members are too thick to understand the concept of changing their vote, and integrity is “disruptive”.

We’re not very clear on why a revote would be susceptible to “hacking” in any way that the original vote isn’t, but we’re sure there’s a great explanation.

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The Casting Vote 150

Posted on March 20, 2023 by

There can surely be no credible disputing that the SNP leadership election – and therefore that of Scotland’s next First Minister – is, to put it very mildly, under a cloud.

The list of let’s call them “irregularities” is almost endless. The artificial truncation of the contest, against the SNP constitution; the packing of the hustings with Humza Yousaf supporters; candidates being denied any knowledge about the size of the membership until voting was under way, and then the party’s press chief and CEO both resigning over lying about it; the apparent existence of 6000 more ballot papers than the party has members; one of the Scottish Government’s most senior officers being improperly seconded to the Yousaf campaign (and then also resigning as a result); numerous documented examples of non-members being given votes while fully-paid-up members weren’t; we could, frankly, go on and on.

As things stand, whoever wins will be forever tainted by the process – easy meat for the Unionist opposition in the Holyrood chamber and the media and a potential legal challenge could cause untold further damage to the party.

With six days still left for voting, the case for a reballot – an administratively fairly trivial task in an election being conducted almost entirely online – is now unanswerable, and needn’t even involve a delay.

Only one person stands in the way.

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Cleaning the stables 114

Posted on March 19, 2023 by

So we were a couple of days early on this one.

In fairness to the Scottish press, it’s had a lot of stuff to fit in recently.

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    • agent x on A different school: “Has anyone asked if Fergus Ewing will stand as a Liberate Scotland umbrella candidate?Jun 23, 21:40
    • Lorn on A different school: “Actually, Aidan, you could not be more wrong. Modern law stems from earliest times in both Scotland and England. It…Jun 23, 21:28
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    • WhoRattledYourCage on A different school: “Wee bit ay Scots poetry fir light relief: https://whorattledyourcage.blogspot.com/2025/06/darknight-lightshow.htmlJun 23, 20:35
    • James on A different school: “It’s Scots I’m mainly aiming at, Sven; we were regularly scolded and belted for speaking in oor ain tongue.Jun 23, 20:14
    • Insider on A different school: “Watch out, Hatey ! “Puir auld Alf” has his ouija board out again to talk to his deid pals. More…Jun 23, 20:12
    • Hatey McHateface on A different school: ““A language is a dialect with an army and navy” Uh oh! So that’s Scots fucked then. Or as we…Jun 23, 20:11
    • Callum on A different school: “Party before Country has been SNP’s position for the last decade. Indy supporters who intend to vote SNP in 2026…Jun 23, 20:09
    • Mia on A different school: ““The second group are those who want Scotland to be independent but do not vote. Some have never voted; some…Jun 23, 19:53
    • Andy Ellis on A different school: “The Danes tried to suppress the Faroese language for centuries. Given current circumstances I reckon most Scots would take a…Jun 23, 19:49
    • Hatey McHateface on A different school: ““world gone mad” Ah ken fit ye mean. I really struggle when Cooper, a politician I have detested since the…Jun 23, 19:48
    • Xaracen on A different school: “It’s a constitution, Aidan, not a system of modern democracy, and it has sod all to do with running an…Jun 23, 19:43
    • Sven on A different school: “James @ 19.16. Indeed they did not, James, and I share what I’m guessing is your entirely justified and righteous…Jun 23, 19:40
    • Hatey McHateface on A different school: “This is powerful stuff, NC. Who knew that the Scots for “internalised oppression” is “internalised oppression”? Or that the Scots…Jun 23, 19:30
    • James on A different school: “But Sven….did the Faroese parents and/or teachers ever belt their weans for speaking in their ain language though?Jun 23, 19:16
    • Aidan on A different school: “@Twatselfhater – Can you find me a single example of a recent case where the outcome was determined based on…Jun 23, 19:15
    • Hatey McHateface on A different school: “@ Lorn says: 23 June, 2025 at 4:27 pm “So you anticipate a breakdown of civilization as occurred in the…Jun 23, 19:13
    • Sven on A different school: “Kanska skuldi eg stríöst fyri á mínum forfedramáli, føroyskum. No, it may be this Scots ancestral tongue,however I do believe…Jun 23, 18:49
    • wullie on A different school: “S. N P Scotland Not ProsperingJun 23, 18:45
    • sarah on A different school: “🙂 🙂 🙂Jun 23, 18:30
    • Sven on A different school: “My online friend, Northy. Thank goodness then for such as I, who happily post using my very own heritage tongue,…Jun 23, 18:10
    • Rev. Stuart Campbell on A different school: “It’s an idea proposed by Wings in 2020. https://wingsoverscotland.com/the-snp-manifesto-2021/ (Although it makes more sense to use the constituency vote.)Jun 23, 18:09
    • twathater on A different school: “So ayden “The obsession with trying to dig up ancient documents and relitigate 1707 has got to be in the…Jun 23, 18:09
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