It’s really very hard to overstate what mendacious, duplicitous shite this is.
It did its job, though. As expected, the SNP conference comprehensively voted down the rebel amendments to Swinney’s motion on independence “strategy” and backed his grand plan of winning a majority, begging Keir Starmer for a second referendum – just like Nicola Sturgeon and Humza Yousaf had done before him with Theresa May, Boris Johnson, Liz Truss and Rishi Sunak – and then scuttling obediently away with his tail between his legs when Starmer told him to get lost.
The SNP conference opened today with Stephen Flynn (primary interest: the career of Stephen Flynn), Karen Adam (primary interest: any shiny or jangly object) and Susan Aitken (primary interest: MOAR PIES), which ought to be more than enough by itself to convincingly illustrate that these are not serious people.
But if you somehow still weren’t certain, there’s this:
That, readers – from Flynn, supposedly the party’s sharpest talent – is political strategising on the level of a football manager wearing his lucky underpants for a cup tie. David Cameron didn’t grant the 2014 referendum because he HAD to, he did it because he saw a political opportunity to kill off independence for decades by delivering a strong victory for the Union.
In the end he got away with the gamble, much more narrowly than he expected to, and no UK Prime Minister will make that mistake again. (Especially as Cameron foolishly DID follow it up with a repeat performance, over Brexit, and this time lost the vote and ended his political career.)
What’s embarrassing is not that Swinney and Flynn are publicly endorsing such an absolute joke of a “strategy”, but that they know it’ll be enough to see the SNP returned to government, where the strategy will fail (whether by not securing the majority or by doing so and having Keir Starmer briskly tell them to sod off), and they can safely trouser fat Holyrood salaries for another half-decade with all the pressure off.
But what if conference delivers a surprise defeat for the leadership during this afternoon’s debate? We don’t expect it to – conference is stuffed with the payroll vote these days, and holding it in Aberdeen yet again has made it as hard as possible for rebels to turn up en masse, short of booking a leaky bothy near Dounreay – but let’s allow it as a possibility just for the sake of argument.
We’ll be honest, readers, we’ve spent most of the last five days sorting out our iPod music library. It’s a task that would make Hercules wince. 2,700 tracks infested with title case and all sorts of other grammatical catastrophes by crappy algorithms (there are songs on there categorised as being by variously “Adam And The Ants”, “Adam & The Ants” and “Adam and The Ants”, FFS), incorrect attributions and missing artwork.
That involved dealing with (shudder) iTunes, the worst piece of computer software ever written by humans – at least until its replacements, Apple Music and Apple Devices, which we had to switch to when halfway through the process, iTunes simply stopped recognising music at all.
(As far as we can tell, it’s now exclusively for managing podcasts.)
We could easily pen you 2000 pretty spicy words on the hundreds of different reasons why everyone who’s ever contributed to the creation of these monstrously dreadful, hateful apps should be thrown into a sewer full of rabid scorpions, and the main reason we’d do that – other than saving ourselves a fortune on therapy – is that it’d still be more interesting than writing about this complete and utter pishdrivel.
The only notable thing about the hilariously pompous “memorandum of understanding” that these two collections of shameless grifters signed up to at the weekend is that The National managed to find a couple of pages of space in its Sunday issue for it, since it’s got absolutely nothing to do with Palestine.
It’d be quite hard to find an image that more completely summed up the wretched state of the SNP in 2025 than this one. Look at that tiny handful of miserable faces, sitting dejectedly around a near-empty function room. It’s so bleak Mike Leigh could make an entire movie out of it.
And we know what you’re thinking – that we sat through some internet livestream to find the most pitiful-looking freezeframe imaginable to show them in a bad light. But nope. Kevin Stewart MSP posted this cheery snapshot of his own free will on Twitter on Sunday morning, presumably in the hope of boosting party morale in some way.
We’ve written a number of extremely, painstakingly detailed articles in the last few months explaining why list votes for the SNP at next year’s election will be wasted, and will serve only to elect Unionist (and in particular Reform) MSPs.
Unfortunately, some people still don’t get it.
And that’s understandable, because super-detailed articles are long and people have terribly short attention spans nowadays, especially if there are large tranches of fiddly arithmetic involved. So let’s go the opposite way.
Nor was it even the fact that his death was captured in all its shocking, bloody horror on video, and inescapable on social media, nor that it came just the day after footage broke of another appalling killing in the States, the unprovoked stabbing of Ukrainian refugee Iryna Zarutska by a violent lunatic who’d been released on no-fee bail despite 14 previous arrests and should never have been at large.
In the end, the most chilling thing about this particular crime is this: Charlie Kirk was killed for doing exactly what civilised people are supposed to do.
(From reporting of the proceedings at Westminster Magistrates Court, it sounds very much like Watson has been directing and influencing Tarquin’s complaints to the police – which had originally been dismissed as baseless – and was largely responsible for the matter getting to trial.)
But Watson isn’t the only middle-aged trans-identifying man with whom “Tarquin” has a seemingly close relationship when it comes to the relentless, vindictive persecution of people who believe in biological sex.
We think (but haven’t been able to verify) that that’s Watson on the left of the thumbnail of the above video, in the facemask and with a brown bag amid extraordinary scenes as Tarquin left the court after giving his evidence.
But the burly, blond bespectacled man at the centre of it, who appears to be acting as some sort of official representative for “Tarquin”, is Stephanie Hayden – born Anthony Halliday, who changed his name in 2005 to Steven Hayden shortly after being released from the Sex Offenders Register (more on that below) before obtaining a GRC in the name of “Stephanie” in 2017.
Hayden is a convicted paedophile and self-described lawyer who, like Lynsay Watson, dedicates his entire life to the persecution of gender-critical campaigners.
And as remarkable as it might seem to anyone who read our previous piece, Hayden may be the more toxic of the two.
We’ve written already about the magnitude of the error transactivists have made in bringing about the arrest of Graham Linehan on trumped-up incitement charges. But thanks to the excellent work of court reporter Nick Wallis this week, the sheer scale of it is still only beginning to unfold.
At its heart is a scarcely-believable tale about how a tiny handful of deeply mentally ill men – at the core, just three – have for years orchestrated a campaign of vindictive, hateful intimidation and terror which has caused untold suffering to individuals, done catastrophic damage to the reputation of the police, and cost the taxpayer millions of pounds, all in a desperate attempt to validate their own delusions.
It’s going to be no small task to summarise it for you. But let’s do our best.
The Scottish Greens, who until last year were a party of government, claim to have 7,600 members. This month they conducted an election to choose two people as their “co-conveners”, from a list of four candidates, and almost 90% of the party’s members decided that they didn’t want any of them.
(All of which she chose to accompany with a series of photographs that made her look like a sinister Cockney chav crime matriarch in a Guy Ritchie movie. She once dubbed herself Scotland’s “chief mammy”, but now comes across more like Ma Baker.)
But we’ve only just finished reading the whole book, so here’s the actual review.
Alf Baird on Learning Insanity: ““SNP Scottish Government has been corrupted and controlled” Yes indeed, as Fanon wrote: the dominant national party is ‘co-opted by…” Jan 15, 16:03
TURABDIN on Learning Insanity: “The great thing about the Burqa is that no one can tell what you are or what you’re hiding or…” Jan 15, 15:51
lothianlad on Learning Insanity: “Excellent piece again Stu. Without you, we would be rudderless. An SNP Scottish Government has been corrupted and controlled.” Jan 15, 14:29
Lorna Campbell on Learning Insanity: “The Jewish American author, Ira Levin, wrote “The Stepford Wives” in 1975. On one level, it can be viewed as…” Jan 15, 14:23
Fearghas MacFhionnlaigh on Learning Insanity: “STONEWALL REPORTS ‘SPECTACULAR FUNDING IMPLOSION’ Stonewall’s annual report reveals its income has fallen by 40 per cent in four years.…” Jan 15, 14:06
Lorna Campbell on Learning Insanity: “Recent studies have found a large correlation between brain and body, James, so it would seem that they are interlinked…” Jan 15, 14:01
James Cheyne on Learning Insanity: “OT, I see Italy is to change their rules based to indigenous populations preference, as France and many other Countries…” Jan 15, 13:09
James Cheyne on Learning Insanity: “Regardless of my own dyslexia and appalling education I still would not want to be sticking my neck out claiming…” Jan 15, 12:54
TURABDIN on Learning Insanity: “ONE DAY AI might provide the means to be anything or anyone you choose in a cyberpunkish universe. No need…” Jan 15, 12:25
James Cheyne on Learning Insanity: “Not so far fetched a scenario as the Scientist and government already consider experimenting on children, babies in the womb,…” Jan 15, 11:52
TURABDIN on Learning Insanity: “IN DEFINING SEX AND GENDER, it seems hormones and a thing called brian dimorphism are involved…maybe also a touch of…” Jan 15, 11:43
James Cheyne on Learning Insanity: “In the future scientific world I could envisage the removal of the brain from its wrong body to replace the…” Jan 15, 11:40
James Cheyne on Learning Insanity: “And I do have a questions, 1: Are the bodies who push this able to define if they were born…” Jan 15, 11:28
James Cheyne on Learning Insanity: “Paid activist, from tax payers money, that no one voted for, Political Phonexology comes to mind. = political evil. This…” Jan 15, 11:05
Cynicus on Learning Insanity: ““I think bollocks is the only acceptable spelling.” ======== Derived from “bullock”, meaning a castrated male calf. “Bullock” and “…” Jan 15, 10:25
Vivian O’Blivion on Learning Insanity: “The John Smith Centre, at the University of Glasgow, announce an upcoming, relaxed conversation, debate format between Deputy First Minister,…” Jan 15, 10:12
Phil on Learning Insanity: “Great analysis of utter bollocks. Sort of off-topic but I’ve just watched a clip of proceedings in the Scottish parliament…” Jan 15, 09:28
turnbulldrier on Learning Insanity: “Thanks for the KLF link. That was a fine start to the morning. As for everything else, “Woo Woo” seems…” Jan 15, 07:31
Willie on Learning Insanity: “This article reinforces, if reinforcement be needed, just how how huge anounts of scarce resources like money and time are…” Jan 15, 07:15
Iain More on Governing For Beginners: “P.S I forgot to add – Get that fuckin Yank NAZI Boat out of the Moray Firth” Jan 15, 01:12
Charles Findlay on Learning Insanity: “I think bollocks is the only acceptable spelling. Anything else would be bollocks.” Jan 14, 22:44
Charles Findlay on Learning Insanity: “I think bollocks is the only acceptable spelling. To spell it bollox would definitely be bollocks.” Jan 14, 22:43
Watching from afar on Learning Insanity: “Should there not be commas between the adjectives? or hyphens somewhere? 😉 (Sven has already pointed out “upon which they…” Jan 14, 21:20
Kate L on Learning Insanity: ““who like all women share an abiding love of steam engines” almost made me spit out my drink. I’ll thankfully…” Jan 14, 20:59
Sven on Learning Insanity: “How very correct my old friend Northy is in suggesting that folk posting upon public Forums upon which they happen…” Jan 14, 20:20
Northcode on Learning Insanity: ““Free speech should have its limits…” – attributed to Jenny-Anne Bishop OBE by an ITV reporter. I agree. Far too…” Jan 14, 20:01
David G on Learning Insanity: “I know Wings serves varied constituencies, but I do so enjoy these more than the ones about the list vote.…” Jan 14, 19:45
Nae Need! on Learning Insanity: “What a lot of money and status is lauded on these individuals. They are afforded a respect they don’t deserve.…” Jan 14, 19:32
Aidan on Learning Insanity: “Are you seeing if you can bag yourself one last NCHI before they get rid of them Stu? I feel…” Jan 14, 19:29