Lacking anything better to do on a grey and cloudy day in Bath, we thought it might be a lark to go through every Holyrood constituency in Scotland and contemplate where it might go in next year’s election, based on the current state of polling.
And just to make things interesting, compared to our last assessment we’re going to give opposition parties the (often considerable) benefit of the doubt in a few seats for the sheer heck of it, and see if there’s any even slightly plausible outcome that means the SNP might win some list seats if all their voters vote for them on both ballots, or if they’ll waste a million votes for nothing and get dozens of Unionists elected like they did in 2021. [SPOILER: don’t prepare yourself for a surprise.]
Actual result: Labour 37, SNP 9, Lib Dems 6, Tories 5. The two horses in the two-horse race finished second and fourth, and won just 19% of seats between them.
And here’s John Swinney a week and a half ago:
The two horses finished second and third.
The matter of whether Yousaf and Swinney are a pair of massive liars, or are simply hopelessly out of touch with political reality, is one we’ll leave to your own judgement.
One of the very few phrases universally recognised in Scotland but which will draw blank looks anywhere else in the UK is the dry, dark “Well, ye ken noo”. Until recently it had no equivalent that we can bring to mind in the rest of the English-speaking world, although arguably that gap has now been at least partly filled by the acronym “FAFO”.
(We try not to swear on the site, so let’s say it stands for “Fool Around, Find Out”.)
So now the smoke has cleared, the troops have departed the battlefield and the winner is enjoying the spoils, what did we find out on Thursday night, and what didn’t we?
We must admit, we don’t quite get what the Daily Record is trying to achieve.
Having already told its dwindling band of readers that voting for both the SNP and Labour is the only way to stop Reform in today’s Hamilton by-election, for the last two days it’s deployed some random loony in a hard hat and the vegan former Rangers captain Graeme Souness to the same ostensible end.
Souness, famously a supporter of Margaret Thatcher and the Conservatives, tells Record readers today that they must vote Labour in order to prevent Thatcher’s right-wing heirs from winning the seat – even though Labour are dead, plucked, stuffed and cooked geese in the eyes of the bookmakers and voting for them only increases the chances of both Reform AND the SNP.
If you’ve been reading Scottish social media or the Scottish press for the last year and a half or so, the following graph is going to come as a bit of a shock to you.
We’ve just taken delivery of some REALLY interesting polling results, readers, but it’s going to take a while to fully analyse and write them up, so in the meantime let’s look at some slightly less interesting ones which came from the same poll – the Norstat one commissioned by the Sunday Times and published today, which we hitched a lift on.
The headline figures show an eight-point Yes lead, which is nice, although it’s also entirely abstract since the SNP has no current policy for translating independence support into actual independence (or even another referendum about it).
All the same, it seemed a good time to assess the wider picture.
If you’re a fan of lazy, superficial political analysis from the mentally unwell, you might have read this week about John Swinney’s great strategic triumph of having “coaxed” an “endorsement” out of the Daily Record for Thursday’s by-election in Hamilton.
And if so, you might be forgiven for thinking that that analysis looks pretty stupid now.
(Holiday Boy is still jetting his way around the globe, and indeed will be for the next few weeks, so in the absence of cartoons what else can we do but look at comics?)
But what, if anything, do those front pages tell us?
Alert readers will be familiar with this site’s ongoing quest for an explanation as to why controversy-plagued charity LGBT Youth Scotland continues to operate in dozens of Scottish primary and even nursery schools, pushing gender ideology onto children as young as four despite only having a remit to support 13-25-year-olds.
Last month we were, to coin a phrase, stonewalled by Scotland’s charity regulator, the OSCR, but we filed a review request and today we received – a couple of weeks past the deadline – a response.
The entire Scottish media and professional-politician community is currently in a self-righteous froth about a campaign ad being run by Reform for the Hamilton by-election targeting Scottish Labour leader Anas Sarwar.
Obviously none of the acres of press coverage trusts voters to see the ad and decide for themselves, because that simply isn’t how journalism works nowadays. You’re told that a bad thing happened – whether it be a campaign ad, a comedian’s joke or the supposed terrible abuse sent to a celebrity – and how outraged various pundits or other celebrities are about it, with the clear implication that you should feel the same, but you almost never get shown or told what was actually said.
So to start with, as a basic journalistic principle, here’s the ad itself in its entirety.
Now let’s look at what you’re being ordered to think about it.
factchecker on Holiday Relief: “On a statistical basis, presumably around 45% of those involved in the transportation and counting process were supporters of independence.…” Jun 19, 15:14
Andy Wiltshire on Holiday Relief: “‘Why aren’t you posting in Scots, Confused?’ I think perhaps he’s a mighty warrior on the interweb, but in real…” Jun 19, 15:05
James Cheyne on Holiday Relief: “Aye I was here in 2014 noting purdah and transporting the votes through the night , in both case connected…” Jun 19, 15:05
James Cheyne on Holiday Relief: “Dan, I notice the influx of people demographical changes here where I live too.” Jun 19, 14:56
James Cheyne on Holiday Relief: “I did not miss the the referendum vote, I only missed the tranporting of the referendum votes through the night,” Jun 19, 14:53
James Cheyne on Holiday Relief: “Nothing to do with whatsoever with Westminster parliament, where you in 2014 Hatey McHateface? As I recall David Cameron was…” Jun 19, 14:51
Alf Baird on Holiday Relief: ““And even though my English isn’t too bad… it’s beginning to feel more and more alien” Aye Northcode, as a…” Jun 19, 14:48
Hatey McHateface on Holiday Relief: ““it is Westminster parliament, politicians and the Crown that always refuse independence of Scotland” You should have been in Scotland…” Jun 19, 13:49
James Cheyne on Holiday Relief: “There is no disconnect between the Westminster parliament form of democracy and the devolved Scottish government form of democracy for…” Jun 19, 13:28
James Cheyne on Holiday Relief: “100% yes. I agree with you regards SNP and the Scottish government are democracy deniers, however it pays not to…” Jun 19, 13:21
TURABDIN on Holiday Relief: “cleabhair gàidh, iù!” Jun 19, 11:57
100%Yes on Holiday Relief: “The reality is and I’ve constantly been saying it for years, that the democracy deniers are the SNP and Scottish…” Jun 19, 11:35
James Cheyne on Holiday Relief: “The elite, cough cough, talk of a great reset of society. I totally agree. We should start with them at…” Jun 19, 11:33
James Cheyne on Holiday Relief: “Sven. I apologise for not responding to your post yesterday due to being busy, things are beginning to function a…” Jun 19, 11:28
diabloandco on Holiday Relief: “Ola , Prickly Pal!” Jun 19, 10:54
Captain Caveman on Holiday Relief: “@Baird You’re speaking English, though I’d agree it is bad and terribly misspelt. Honestly, it’s like explaining to a 9…” Jun 19, 10:51
Hatey McHateface on Holiday Relief: ““volkgiest” There’s still time for you to make it big on the comedy circuit, Northcode.” Jun 19, 10:46
Hatey McHateface on Holiday Relief: “@ Alf Baird says: 19 June, 2025 at 9:27 am “biased in favour of the minority Gaelic language over the…” Jun 19, 10:45
Captain Caveman on Holiday Relief: ““e.g. an englishman will whine that he couldn’t get “a full english breakfast” on HOLIDAY IN PORTUGAL” Actually, this Englishman…” Jun 19, 10:44
Northcode on Holiday Relief: ““Ma Englis isna too bad, tho Englis is niver ma mither tongue.” Mine isna tae bad aither, Alf. An like…” Jun 19, 10:28
Southernbystander on Holiday Relief: “There is a level of irony you are missing Northcode (tune up those synapses!) – the ‘boom boom’ was there…” Jun 19, 10:16
Alf Baird on Holiday Relief: ““I would think Urdu,Punjabi and Arabic are the second most spoken languages in Scotland after English,” Naw, Scots langage is…” Jun 19, 10:09
Xaracen on Holiday Relief: ““the highly vaunted “approach to the UN” has been completely rebuffed at the first hurdle” No, Aidan, it has not,…” Jun 19, 09:35
Alf Baird on Holiday Relief: “Ma Englis isna too bad, tho Englis is niver ma mither tongue. The first thing a liberated people grasp is…” Jun 19, 09:27
Dan on Holiday Relief: “@ Anthem Aye, much the same around my rural area with increasing numbers of white flighter “refugees” from England. There’s…” Jun 19, 08:28
Anthem on Holiday Relief: “No, he isn’t. I know exactly what he’s talking about. It’s the same on the Fife coast.” Jun 19, 07:57
Oneliner on Holiday Relief: “Obair mhath, Fearghas” Jun 19, 05:12
Insider on Holiday Relief: “Northcode… Why aren’t you posting in Scots Northcode ? Your English is appalling !” Jun 18, 22:36
Insider on Holiday Relief: ““Scot” “Was down the East coast ,North Berwick to St Abbs, last weekend,full of posh English immigrants being attended to…” Jun 18, 22:27
Fearghas MacFhionnlaigh on Holiday Relief: “ODASAI-FÀNAIS ALBANNACH 2025 A Hàil, Fosgail an doras… Fosgail saitse an spàil-fhànais, a Hàil… Cha chreid mi gum fosgail, a…” Jun 18, 22:11