Many expert observers have already noted that the document flatly contradicts the Scottish Government’s previous repeated and strenuous assertions that a Gender Recognition Certificate confers “no new rights” on trans people, and have published extremely detailed assessments which are frankly all but impenetrable to non-lawyers but basically conclude that the Scottish Government’s position is a mess.
Our favourite line, however, is this one.
So if you’re obliged to have a 50/50 sex balance in your boardroom, you can do it by hiring a man with a GRC saying he’s legally female, or by hiring a woman.
We believe that the young folk nowadays call that a “self-own”.
As a lifelong political geek and former SNP and Alba Party member, I’ve spent years supporting Scotland’s independence movement. However, over the last few years, I’ve watched the campaign (as opposed to support for independence) wither away. Being a Scottish nationalist has become increasingly disheartening, like watching someone you love succumb to a slow, debilitating illness. In frustration, I switched off from my homeland and turned my focus to the drama of US politics.
Over the last three years I immersed myself in it, watching both left and right-wing outlets. I became so hooked and invested that I jumped on a plane to Washington DC for the 2024 election. I canvassed with DC Democrats in rural Pennsylvania (that’s me third from the left in the pic below), attended Kamala Harris’s concession rally, and went to Trump’s only watch party in DC.
My journey led me to believe that Scotland’s independence campaign could learn a great deal from Trump’s victory and the Democrats’ failure.
We’ll give you three guesses as to the highly controversial and extravagantly taxpayer-funded organisation that has its rainbow fingerprints all over this story, readers.
So it looks like the USA has elected a mad orange rapist convicted of 34 felonies who could yet be in jail by the time of his inauguration. (He would remain President even if that happened, which would be really funny.) And we can’t even blame them for it, because the alternative they were offered was, remarkably and stupendously, worse.
To be honest, readers, the peculiar events of yesterday continued to nag at us all day as every news broadcaster in Scotland and beyond leapt eagerly on the ludicrous non-story from the Herald On Sunday’s front page. (It was even the #2 item on BBC Radio Wales, inexplicably).
For such an absolute nothingball of scurrilous sub-gossip to so dominate the entire news media was just too strange to ignore. We cannot remember the last time a low-grade freelancer managed to sell the same story to FOUR major Scottish newspapers – who normally, remember, only want exclusives for their big front-page splashes – let alone a crummy opinion columnist (not even an actual news reporter) who’s only been back in journalism for five minutes after a 15-year break as a failed PR guru.
(Once they’d all run the shoddy hatchet piece, TV and radio then had all the excuse they needed to blare it across the airwaves. “Oh, it’s not us inflating and amplifying this garbage, guv, we’re just reporting what the papers are saying.”)
So in our eternal quest for enlightenment and understanding we thought we’d see if we could find out a bit more about the little-known but recently-revived sleeper assassin with the ironic name: Carlos Alba.
Alex Salmond will be laid to rest in the green turf of Aberdeenshire today in a quiet and dignified private ceremony. (A public celebration of his life will take place next month.)
Most of Scotland’s press and commentariat beclowned itself shamefully after his death just as it did during his life, but below is a (regrettably short) collection of those who did otherwise and who deserve to be noted honourably beside the man himself.
Redaction is a tricky business, and comes with numerous pitfalls even if you’re being careful, which not everyone is. If you’re involved in creating a document you know will have to be redacted, there are a variety of safeguarding approaches you can adopt.
When I worked on a videogames magazine called Amiga Power in the 1990s, we ran a fun comedy feature about censorship. But because the company that published the magazine had had some unfortunate mishaps in the field, we took extra care by typing all the “offensive” words as random-length strings of Xs when we wrote the article.
And it was lucky that we did, because as you can see in the feature’s strapline, the art department misaligned the red redaction bar on some of them, and if there’d been a sweary in there it would have been easily identified.
Hatey McHateface on The thickness of blood: “Wow! Lots going on in the world. Even happenings in Auld Scotia. Deid on here though.” Feb 18, 07:27
Young Lochinvar on The thickness of blood: “? True, but then again I always reckoned Glasgow looked best in the rear view mirror. Face it; the bulk…” Feb 18, 03:04
twathater on The thickness of blood: “Geoff if these arsewipes continue with their disciplinary procedure on Friday and SP’s lawyers are forced to go to court…” Feb 17, 17:15
Hatey McHateface on The thickness of blood: “I’ve tried everything FIoD. £50 says the problem lies in Bath. Karma for the leccy thieves ” Feb 17, 14:55
The Flying Iron of Doom on The thickness of blood: “Any update on the server problem? Anyone?” Feb 17, 14:04
Hatey McHateface on The thickness of blood: ““Apparently we have free speech and live in a democracy” I’m free to call you an eejit and vote out…” Feb 17, 12:07
James Gardner on The thickness of blood: “https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Crusades” Feb 17, 11:48
James Gardner on The thickness of blood: “Looks like Sandie can take them to the cleaners for harassment………..” Feb 17, 11:43
Marie on The thickness of blood: “She’s possibly been shadow banned by some entity intent on destroying free speech. Apparently we have free speech and live…” Feb 17, 11:11
Andrew scott on The thickness of blood: “Dr whatever is a BLOKE no gender certificate why was a bloke in a frock allowed-to go into the ladies…” Feb 17, 09:35
diabloandco on The thickness of blood: “Biology is no longer a hard and fast science in Scotland even in medical circles – utterly beyond belief and…” Feb 17, 09:30
The Flying Iron of Doom on Seeding the briar patch: “Is the site still useable on smartphones and tablets?” Feb 17, 08:51
Hatey McHateface on The thickness of blood: “MSM reporting that a gentleman reputed to be the world’s first openly gay imam, has been shot dead in South…” Feb 17, 08:47
Caledonia on The thickness of blood: “Why has the community notes disappeared from steve north tweet” Feb 17, 08:47
Hatey McHateface on The thickness of blood: “Thanks for posting that link, Geoff. It’s a disgraceful tale of madness, petty venom and open mis-use of taxpayer’s resources…” Feb 17, 08:35
Hatey McHateface on The thickness of blood: “Please clarify for us, gregor. Is it Him who’s been speaking to you, or just you that’s been speaking to…” Feb 17, 08:11
Hatey McHateface on The thickness of blood: “Is Rev Stu trying to tell us something? The state of this site mirrors the state of Scotland under the…” Feb 17, 08:00
Young Lochinvar on The thickness of blood: “The 2 types used to be generalised/ known as the flashers and the peeping Toms/ knicker nickers I.e. no outdoor…” Feb 17, 00:27
Geoff Anderson on The thickness of blood: “Now they are going to sack Sandie for “misgendering” https://archive.ph/XmNMj” Feb 16, 20:42
Southernbystander on The thickness of blood: “Same here as of Sunday evening. Click on anything much on the site and it tries to download this app.…” Feb 16, 20:19
gregor on The thickness of blood: ““For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who by their unrighteousness…” Feb 16, 19:18
Dan on Off-topic: “Test Site is still fucked and auto-downloading exe. file when trying to navigate the site. Multiple people commenting on the…” Feb 16, 18:11
twathater on The thickness of blood: “Rev I made 4 or 5 comments yesterday on my tablet and laptop which haven’t appeared , I also just…” Feb 16, 17:51
George Ferguson on The thickness of blood: “Stu we have serious issue with this executable attachment. I have very expensive anti-malware software. I can’t do anything to…” Feb 16, 17:51
Hatey McHateface on For Mridul And Sandy: ““Jist say naw tae nonsense” Looks like somebody was listening. And acted Geri first victim tae. Awww.” Feb 16, 17:50
Del G on The thickness of blood: “My cache/history are purged, yet that pesky client still shoves its tootsies into my download folder. I think you may…” Feb 16, 16:40
George Ferguson on The thickness of blood: “This executable file attachment is very persistent. I keep clearing everything but it pops up on each attempt to post.…” Feb 16, 16:35
Caledonia on The thickness of blood: “How did steve north get the community notes removed under his post of trans woman are woman” Feb 16, 16:08