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Archive for the ‘wtf’


Tartan Messiah 2 80

Posted on March 08, 2025 by

We don’t need a cartoonist today. How could he be funnier than this?

Please let us one day discover who the wailing colleague was.

Why I’m Never Leaving Twitter 236

Posted on February 27, 2025 by

You just don’t get this sort of quality content on Bluesky. (They’d faint, poor lambs.)

And all the furry nappy porn is a poor substitute.

The Zone Of Interesting 134

Posted on February 21, 2025 by

A couple of days ago a reader asked on Twitter if we thought Reform, who continue to lead in UK opinion polling, might allow a second indyref if they actually got into power, as it would for obvious reasons be hypocritical of them not to. And to be frank we dismissed it out of hand, because Nigel Farage is the ultimate British nationalist, he’d have no obvious political reason to, and since when did hypocrisy bother politicians?

And then last night a longstanding Courier/Press & Journal reporter (who despite that is an all-round decent chap and indy supporter) tweeted this:

And actually, on further thought, that’s not the craziest idea at all.

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The Solution 22

Posted on August 30, 2024 by

All one can hope is that this was an unfortunate slip of the tongue.

Otherwise, folks, you’ll just have to buck your ideas up.

The Golden Shot 239

Posted on August 07, 2024 by

As any moderately heavy internet user will tell you, it’s very easy to get into a situation where you have literally hundreds of browser tabs open at any one time.

Every now and again you’ll go to clean them up and find something that you’ve been meaning to write about in a quiet moment, and this certainly counts as a quiet moment in Scottish politics, so let’s do this one now.

Because the story above is from March, but we don’t think we’ve ever seen anyone anywhere talk about just how weird it is, or what it tells us about the 2024 SNP.

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How To Punch Women In The Face 368

Posted on August 01, 2024 by

(And Get Away With It)

You’d have to be living in a pretty strict prison not to have heard the big story from today’s Olympics in Paris, in which male Algerian cheat Imane Khelefi was put in a boxing ring with young Italian woman Angela Carini and allowed to hit her in the head for 46 seconds until she retired, in tears and in fear for her safety, saying “I had to preserve my life”.

Sound like your kind of fun, men? It’s surprisingly easy!

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Sandwich Down 139

Posted on July 04, 2024 by

We had to go and check for ourselves to make sure this really happened.

But it did.

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The Absence Of Pride 67

Posted on June 24, 2024 by

When you’ve been watching Scotland playing football for 50 years of your life, you become accustomed to disappointment. You expect disappointment. Anything better than disappointment becomes a bonus.

You also come to expect injustice, like last night’s inexplicable failure of VAR – which has unfailingly spotted micro-infringements like a player’s toenail being offside – to even take a look at a nailed-on stonewall penalty in the last minutes of the game.

But because you’re so used to these things, you’re not expecting rage.

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An Offer You Can’t Understand 110

Posted on June 20, 2024 by

This is one of the strangest political campaign videos we’ve ever seen.

Join us as we try to make sense of it.

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Step right up for the clown show 196

Posted on June 15, 2024 by

Holiday Boy is still off single-handedly feeding the cats of Greece, but the modern SNP is all the cartoon you need.

The Circus Of Hate 286

Posted on May 09, 2024 by

Well, what a nice statement of unity and tolerance this is:

And only slightly undermined by coming from THIS guy:

But Smith’s new message of tolerance hasn’t fully penetrated the party ranks.

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The Labyrinth Of Stupidity 142

Posted on April 26, 2024 by

It’s probably as good an illustration of the madness currently engulfing Scottish politics as anything that the most unusual suspect, Anas Sarwar, may have just – temporarily at least – saved Humza Yousaf’s job.

And although our head hurts already, we’ll try to explain why.

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    • Stuart on Safety First: “The trans gender nonsense continues, this time in the shape of Museums and Art Galleries Scotland, this from the Herald.…Jul 27, 23:37
    • Mark Beggan on Safety First: “What’s the penalty for pretending to have a bomb on an aeroplane these days? Boy! This lads ass is grass.Jul 27, 22:53
    • Mark Beggan on Safety First: “‘colonially subjugated’ I find a glass of warm water with a teaspoonfull of cider vinegar does the trick.Jul 27, 22:49
    • Fearghas MacFhionnlaigh on Safety First: “Encouraging high-register article by KATHLEEN STOCK on UNHERD (25 July 2025) – ‘IS THIS THE END OF TRANSGENDERISM: We are…Jul 27, 22:38
    • Mark Beggan on Safety First: “Under Thatcher they would have taken away the wheelchair.Jul 27, 22:37
    • Southernbystander on Safety First: “@Dave L. International fees can be set by the university. International fees in an ordinary ni in England are about…Jul 27, 22:31
    • Alf Baird on Safety First: “Yes James, a colonized people are ‘procured’ (Memmi), the wages of colonialism (‘Equivalent’) paid to native elites, many already assimilated…Jul 27, 22:27
    • Hatey McHateface on Safety First: “@NN! You need to prove that you are not paid to come on here and make Scotland and Indy look…Jul 27, 21:45
    • GM on Safety First: “Welcome. Anything to report since you have been away?Jul 27, 21:35
    • Hatey McHateface on Safety First: “Yes NN!, I have considered the matter. For a start, my considerations lead me to believe it’s not a “fact”…Jul 27, 21:26
    • MaryB on Safety First: “Sarah, Northcode etc I find that inde-car ie Gordon Ross, also known as Partick Driver, is the best place to…Jul 27, 21:06
    • Captain Caveman on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: “@Xaracen ‘… I’m disinclined to acquiesce to your request.’ Oh, I bet you are. Imagine my surprise.Jul 27, 21:05
    • Nae Need! on Safety First: “Well, I enjoy Confused’s posts, sometimes simply cos they annoy YOU so much, but mostly cos they’re excellent. None of…Jul 27, 20:56
    • Southernbystander on Safety First: “@Young Lochinvar. English students pay the same as they would in England yes. I suspect overseas students from China, India…Jul 27, 20:49
    • Andy Ellis on Safety First: “Folk are of course free to support the referral to the UN using the process and procedure which is in…Jul 27, 20:39
    • Xaracen on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: “@Captain Caveman; I’m disinclined to acquiesce to your request.Jul 27, 20:38
    • DaveL on Safety First: “So how much do they pay?Jul 27, 20:38
    • Stuart on Safety First: “Mr Ellis, how dare you mention the obvious solution! Not when those pushing this farce at the UN can keep…Jul 27, 20:26
    • Nae Need! on Safety First: “Laughing out loud here 🙂 There’s an awful lot to unpack, Confused, when it comes to a witty come back…Jul 27, 20:23
    • Nae Need! on Safety First: “No, Agent X, it’s not a laugh, and we’re not treating it as a laugh either. Like wot Willie says,…Jul 27, 20:14
    • Andrew scott on Safety First: “O/t FFS Engerlannd win the footiieJul 27, 20:04
    • Nae Need! on Safety First: “Asides from your entirely unnecessary jibes/aspersions on my character, of which there were too many lolz, Mr Hatey, I do…Jul 27, 20:01
    • Nae Need! on Safety First: “Yes. Of concern to me to.Jul 27, 19:49
    • Nae Need! on Safety First: “Hatey, Ever considered the fact that those outwith those two categories of behaviour might actually be fewer than you think?…Jul 27, 19:46
    • Hatey McHateface on Safety First: “Ah, c’moan noo, Andy. 1000 to 1 says absolutely delusional. With a healthy side order of “give me Indy, but…Jul 27, 19:42
    • Hatey McHateface on Safety First: “Commiserations on your hyperactive imagination. Perhaps your only recourse is to spend your conscious hours seeking rapid paralytic unconsciousness through…Jul 27, 19:38
    • Northcode on Safety First: “I also meant to add a link to this report dated 28th May 2025 submitted to the UN by Justice…Jul 27, 19:36
    • Nae Need! on Safety First: “Och, Willie, I’m loving your thinking. ” reflecting the deep meaningful thought that pervades our Scottish Government.” They’re astounding and…Jul 27, 19:36
    • Andy Ellis on Safety First: “So as many of us already thought, this process is of doubtful utility and could take some undetermined amount of…Jul 27, 19:31
    • Hatey McHateface on Safety First: “Tch, NC. Line the weans up bareback on a garron, eldest at the front, wee-ist at the back. Don’t even…Jul 27, 19:19
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