The turnout at the “independence march and rally” yesterday was so abysmally poor that it seems almost unfair to pick on any of the scores of SNP elected representatives who didn’t bother to show up.
But dear old Cosy Feet Pete Wishart had the most chef’s-kiss excuse of all.
The reason he didn’t fancy getting his wee Billy Whizz quiff blown about a chilly Calton Hill was that he had important business “taking on the far right” – who were of course nowhere to be seen – with “half a million” (50,000) of his British besties, a convenient short Tube ride away from his London residence, at a pretty openly anti-Semitic protest called, with a double layer of delicious comedic value… UK Together.
If events in Edinburgh today are anything to go by – when a march and rally announced with great fanfare seven months ago, backed by both the “independence” parties in the Scottish Parliament and featuring the First Minister as main speaker, attracted perhaps 1,500 people at the most to Calton Hill on a bright and sunny day – the independence movement faces an imminent final apocalypse.
So here’s how to prepare yourself for when the SNP win a landslide with 35%, Keir Starmer says “So what?” and then a deathly silence descends for another five years.
Even Kelly Given and Iona Fyfe didn’t show up for this one. That’s how bad it is.
The last faint hope of any remotely positive or at least interesting outcome of May’s election just left the building.
It wasn’t MUCH of a hope, and it’s absolutely no surprise in the wake of the comically shambolic, belief-defyingly inept farce that has been the birth of Jeremy Corbyn and Zarah Sultana’s fringe-of-the fringe party, but all the same its extinguishing means the next two months will be even more of a waste of time than they looked like being.
Frankly, readers, we may as well not bother having an election at all.
The number of parties who got MSPs elected at the last election is… five. (Though in fairness there are now six, Reform having a single MSP after Graham Simpson defected from the Tories. The Lib Dems are even outnumbered by independents, of whom there are seven.)
Which is handy, because today is also the day of the Gorton and Denton by-election in Manchester (fun fact: a seat we’d very likely have lived in ourselves if not for Osama bin Laden, but that’s another story), and that throws up some interesting parallels.
There is a not particularly funny joke that is sometimes told in legal circles about why a law student failed to finish his coursework – because he had no conviction. With rare exceptions lawyers aren’t renowned for their sense of humour but I can’t help thinking someone, at the highest levels of our justice system, is having a right laugh at my expense and those who have loyally supported me over the past six years.
I’m talking about the Lord Advocate, Dorothy Bain KC – a sitting member of the Scottish Government’s cabinet who was nominated by Nicola Sturgeon to that post in 2021, five months after I was acquitted.
For those unfamiliar with my case, I offer this brief summary. In March 2020 I made a short video on my mobile phone that was two minutes and thirty eight seconds in length. I hadn’t planned to make the video when I went out for a walk in a field near my home. But I was annoyed and wanted to articulate that annoyance, although at the time I recorded it I wasn’t intending for it to go much further.
Later that night, just before turning in, I uploaded it to my YouTube channel on a closed, unlisted link and then posted that link to my Twitter account that, at the time, had a modest 1000 or so followers. I then forgot about it.
Little did I know that short mobile phone video would result in me facing initially a criminal trial, then a five year legal battle in the highest civil court in Scotland and now, most likely, an appeal to the European Court of Human Rights in Strasbourg.
So on the one hand there’s obviously very little point paying attention to the SNP’s regional list candidates for May’s Holyrood election, because as this website has comprehensively demonstrated over recent months, the chances of the SNP having any list MSPs elected are remote.
However, nothing is impossible, so let’s take a look at the B team, which also serves as a guide to the party’s upcoming talent taking its first steps towards the gravy bus.
As the six-year fight for justice for Alex Salmond continues, we thought you might like to see this clip from this morning’s Mike Graham Show, interviewing Paul McManus, the businessman and drummer in Glasgow rock band Gun who’s stepped up to fund the Salmond family’s case against the Scottish Government despite disagreeing with much of what Alex stood for politically.
robertkknight on Faces In Sand: “Hey, Mr Misnomer… Just for you: https://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/politics/independence-referendum-figures-revealed-majority-5408163.amp” Oct 24, 14:53
Dan on Faces In Sand: “Yay, for post responding to Hatey’s brake hack released from moderation. To add a bit more info. Brake fluid has…” Oct 24, 14:26
DaveL on Faces In Sand: “‘They need to see that the institutions will function, the economy will stabilise, and the transition will be orderly.’ In…” Oct 24, 14:14
Geri on Faces In Sand: “Do they really? So a slogan on a bus & parroting ‘take back control ‘ didn’t work for Brexshit? Who…” Oct 24, 13:30
factcjecker on Faces In Sand: “Geri, I note the impeccable logic of your position. When it refers to England: “They’re hard wired racists. If “foreigners”…” Oct 24, 12:37
Geri on Faces In Sand: “That rewinding prick should be forced onto the first bus out of here. Why isn’t he? He’ll be receiving government…” Oct 24, 12:34
Northcode on Faces In Sand: “A forward-looking, inclusive case for independence can only persuade if it feels real. That means it must be grounded in…” Oct 24, 12:32
Dan on Faces In Sand: “fc says: “Thanks for the kind and polite words, Dan. That’s the way to formulate an argument.” Nae bother, treat…” Oct 24, 12:10
Northcode on Faces In Sand: “Across the world, when territories recognised by the UN as non-self-governing (NSGTs) have voted on independence, the results follow a…” Oct 24, 12:02
Geri on Faces In Sand: “15 year + is the acceptable measure by our colonising overlords. Personally I’d make it much more because they’ve already…” Oct 24, 12:00
Geri on Faces In Sand: “Dan, It’s pure projection on their part. It always is. They’re hard wired racists. If “foreigners” were allowed a vote…” Oct 24, 11:43
factchecker on Faces In Sand: ““Dan says: 24 October, 2026 at 11:02 am @ “factchecker” You can go fuck yourself with that assertion ya word…” Oct 24, 11:29
Confused on Faces In Sand: “RUPERT LOWE is out-faraging the farage – farage will deport them all, but lowe will now deport the “second generation”…” Oct 24, 11:19
Geri on Faces In Sand: “They weren’t qualified to vote. They were blow-ins, seasonal workers & second home owners & every other waif & stray…” Oct 24, 11:15
Dan on Faces In Sand: “@ “factchecker” You can go fuck yourself with that assertion ya word twisting twat. There’s plenty evidence posted btl over…” Oct 24, 11:02
Geri on Faces In Sand: “You’re as thick as ever, shit face. Brussels is run by the yanks & the IMF. NATO is run by…” Oct 24, 10:44
Northcode on Faces In Sand: “The idea that inward migrants automatically vote No is one of the easiest fear-buttons to press, but it doesn’t survive…” Oct 24, 10:41
factchecker on Faces In Sand: “Our learned professor of boats says 24 October, 2026 at 10:08 am “In any event there is no democracy for…” Oct 24, 10:22
Captain Caveman on Faces In Sand: “It’s all very well pointing out the obvious (in TURABDIN’s case) that “referenda have their limitations”. Like, no shit Sherlock,…” Oct 24, 10:11
factchecker on Faces In Sand: “Get says “Fact checker not checking their facts again. Scotland voted YES in it’s wee “open to all” pretendy opinion…” Oct 24, 10:10
Alf Baird on Faces In Sand: “In any event there is no democracy for a people who continue to be made subject to territorial alienation and…” Oct 24, 10:08
Hatey McHateface on Faces In Sand: ““Don’t go preaching about fair democracy in the UK and claim it is a unitary State when there are not…” Oct 24, 10:05
Hatey McHateface on Faces In Sand: “@ Geri says: 24 October, 2026 at 9:35 am Way to go, Geri. Always educational and informative to read a…” Oct 24, 09:59
factchecker on Faces In Sand: “Geri says ” It wasn’t a democratic vote. You removed EU citizens & migrants from the vote … Democracy my…” Oct 24, 09:59
Captain Caveman on Faces In Sand: “@Dan Electoral franchises and constitutional matters are hardly my area of expertise, but surely it’s obvious that EU nationals living…” Oct 24, 09:55
Factchecker on Faces In Sand: “Agreed. But most of the same reservations apply to actual elections. The turnout for the Referendum was higher than for…” Oct 24, 09:48
Hatey McHateface on Faces In Sand: ““They’re a nobody” Yet somehow they’ve got Scotland crushed, oppressed, asset stripped, robbed blind, colonised and doun hauden. It’s so…” Oct 24, 09:45
Geri on Faces In Sand: “Slippery falsefact sassanach. The legal mechanism for Brexshit happened AFTER the Brexshit referendum. It was a glorified opinion poll that…” Oct 24, 09:35
Hatey McHateface on Faces In Sand: ““diversity stress: a kind of constant, low-grade anxiety associated with having to negotiate normative and linguistic differences, public-resource competition, and…” Oct 24, 09:35
Captain Caveman on Faces In Sand: “Hotpot. HOTPOT ENGLISH HotpotTttt! EEEENGLISHHHHHH HOTTTTPOTTTTT!!!11!!!1!111!1!1!11 AARRRGH!! hotpothotpothotpothotpottttt FLIBBLE ANGLOS111 FRANG!!!!!” Oct 24, 09:27