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Steadying The Ship 78

Posted on May 15, 2026 by

Looks like this, apparently.

The Broken Rainbow 158

Posted on May 13, 2026 by

The image below is a graph illustrating how many seats each party won in last week’s supposedly “proportional” Scottish Parliament election, compared to how many they would have won if the electoral system had been actually proportional.

The SNP and Greens are now over-represented by 37% and 50% respectively, while the Unionist parties are all under-represented compared to their vote share by (left to right) 26%, 19%, 20% and 23%.

The Additional Member System has failed very badly at its job, from either perspective. “Pro-indy” parties have 73 seats (57%) rather than the 52 seats that their 40.8% vote share should have earned, while Unionist parties have 56 seats (or 43%) when they should have 69 for their 56% of the vote.

(The other 4% of the vote was scattered among 24 other parties or independents, with 1.8% going to identifiably pro-independence candidates, increasing the total “pro-indy” vote to 42.6%, fully 10 points short of current polling for independence itself.)

It is, therefore, a little bit of a stretch – to put it mildly – to present the refusal of the UK government to grant a second independence referendum on the basis of the results as an outrage against “democracy”. Indeed, if any outrage against democracy has taken place, it happened last Thursday.

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The Hills Of Far Away 136

Posted on May 12, 2026 by

Anyone seeking to make a compelling argument for the proposition that Scotland’s politicians and lawmakers are simply too farcically incompetent to ever be trusted with running an independent country had a gift-wrapped Godsend delivered to them last week by the idiot student children of Edinburgh.

But we can’t really put the blame on the colourfully-haired, keffiyeh-clad cretin kiddies of the capital for that, because it’s their elders and betters who opened the door.

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And Nothing Happened Forever 353

Posted on May 09, 2026 by

Well, we told you so. We told you in March (and indeed long before then) that the 2026 Holyrood election was a giant waste of time and money that would deliver exactly the same useless Parliament we already had, and so it proved.

The SNP ended up giving half-a-dozen seats to the Greens, Labour donated a handful to the Lib Dems, the Tories split into two parties with 29 seats instead of a single party with 31 and that’s about it. The SNP, Greens and Lib Dems stayed first, fourth and last, while the right-wing split let Labour creep from 3rd to joint 2nd despite losing seats.

A pro-indy tally of 72 became a pro-indy tally of 73, big whoop, and almost every SNP list vote elected Unionists instead, just as we told you for almost a year it would do.

We also told you that the only place there was even a chance of an SNP list seat was in the Highland region, where they did indeed sneak one at the very death of play, only because they’d somehow pulled off the incredible feat of losing Kate Forbes’ old seat of Skye, Lochaber and Badenoch on a huge 21% swing, despite having started with a 15,000 majority in a seat where only 39,000 people voted.

So there we are.

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Pick Your Poison 207

Posted on May 07, 2026 by

At the end of last year we noted the unusual and persistent levels of divergence in Scottish political polling. As polls have become much more frequent during the election campaign, nothing about that has changed. The final polls, published yesterday, are so far apart from each other that they tell us basically zip.

Analysing this mess is meaningless, so we’ll just give you some highlights.

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The value bet 68

Posted on May 06, 2026 by

To pass the time on (praise be to Baby Jeebus) the last day of the Holyrood election campaign, we thought we’d do a catch-up summary of all the seat projections we could find from last month and this month. Here it is.

Now, as it happens we think the potential seat ranges are significantly wider. There are so many factors of uncertainty that while there’s no credible doubt who’s going to be the biggest party, we reckon SNP seats could potentially be anywhere from about 47 to 68 (most likely the upper part of that range), with corresponding ramifications below.

But there’s one potentially interesting thing in that bottom half.

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Anas Sarwar is a winner 31

Posted on May 06, 2026 by

Specifically, of the Single Most Toe-Curlingly, Face-Palmingly Cretinous Thing Said In The 2026 Holyrood Election Campaign, And Possibly Any Election Ever, Prize.

We mean, wow. We could easily write a 1000-word article purely on the top 10 things that are fatuously, obviously idiotic about those three short sentences, and so could you. So imagine how embarrassed the poor Daily Record must be today.

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Binfire Of The Vanities 181

Posted on May 04, 2026 by

For a nation that prides itself on hating the Tories, this is very odd.

And if you don’t see how, let us illustrate.

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Seven Days Too Long 315

Posted on April 30, 2026 by

It’s nearly over, readers. Just one more week of this to endure.

The most miserable Holyrood election campaign of all time will end next Thursday with an election which will deliver Scotland’s most miserable devolved government of all time. Only the exact form, colour and shape of the misery remains to be determined.

So as the SNP promise through forked tongues to cut the cost of living with a pledge they know full well they have no chance of being able to actually implement, while using the powers they DO have to INCREASE the cost of everything that makes life WORTH living, let’s look at exactly what flavour of dog vomit we can expect to be choking down along with our state-approved organic broccoli and fat-free gruel for the next half-decade.

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The Pit Of Vipers 249

Posted on April 19, 2026 by

It’s hard to know where to start with the Sunday Mail’s lead story today.

Especially if one doesn’t want sent to prison.

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The Narcissism Of No Differences 96

Posted on April 17, 2026 by

So that’s the full set of manifestos in.

You can download them all here in a oner, if you’re REALLY bored. But we don’t advise it, because we can just tell you what they say in a couple of minutes.

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Happy Anniversary 119

Posted on April 16, 2026 by

It was exactly one year ago today that the Supreme Court delivered its judgment in the case of For Women Scotland Vs The Scottish Ministers, a judgment which has still not been implemented by the Scottish or UK governments, so it was quite bold of the SNP to choose it as the launch date for their manifesto.

The judgment (which the SNP are in fact still fighting in court) is not referenced in the document and the phrases “women’s rights” and “single-sex” do not appear anywhere in it, although it does say “We are committed to upholding and protecting the human rights of trans people as far as possible within our powers and we will do all we can to ensure that trans people’s identities are recognised and respected”.

So, y’know, more of the same to come for the next five years.

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    • Peter McAvoy on You’ll Have Had Your Supper: “Just seen the video at the top of the article. We are fucked.Aug 25, 02:05
    • Rev. Stuart Campbell on You’ll Have Had Your Supper: ““This video featuring the party’s MP Melanie Ward”Aug 25, 01:42
    • Cynicus on You’ll Have Had Your Supper: ““… as is being reported, there are emails between very senior SNP and establishment discussing how woke and gender policies…Aug 25, 00:49
    • Graf Midgehunter on You’ll Have Had Your Supper: “She’s an imbicile Worse a Labour imbicile which is nearly as bad as an SNP imbicile Where’s the mealie puddin…Aug 25, 00:19
    • Dramfineday on You’ll Have Had Your Supper: “My Geography teacher, Mr Duncan in 1968, for one.Aug 24, 23:20
    • Red on You’ll Have Had Your Supper: ““Scotland hasn’t got the highest energy prices in the world” Oh, it’s ‘only’ the fifth highest energy prices in the…Aug 24, 23:01
    • Hatey McHateface on You’ll Have Had Your Supper: “Scotland hasn’t got the highest energy prices in the world. That’s an easily verifiable fact. Quite a few of the…Aug 24, 22:40
    • Hatey McHateface on You’ll Have Had Your Supper: “Asking fer a mate. Fit’s the surest way tae mak ye cock the spandau? Haud oan noo. That’s nae a…Aug 24, 22:30
    • Red on You’ll Have Had Your Supper: “Scotland 2026: A Fish Tale You go to order a fish supper. It costs £15 because of Labour’s employment taxes,…Aug 24, 22:14
    • Confused on You’ll Have Had Your Supper: “next up, she explains GERS www.youtube.com/watch?v=gd44JZsPrkc this is what the fragrant people eat https://archive.ph/pyNWz differnt kind of munchie boxAug 24, 22:10
    • msean on You’ll Have Had Your Supper: “About right,lol.Aug 24, 22:09
    • robertkknight on You’ll Have Had Your Supper: “Deep-fried patronising piece of sh*t of a broadcast. Vote for them? I’d rather smear myself in peanut butter and jump…Aug 24, 22:07
    • Frank Gillougley on You’ll Have Had Your Supper: “sorry , forgot to add the all important – ur whit? as it adds that somewhat desperate note of dependencyAug 24, 22:03
    • Confused on You’ll Have Had Your Supper: “my mate had this senile old labrador, a fat bastard to boot, that would aggressively obsessively try to hump your…Aug 24, 21:55
    • Hatey McHateface on Before Action: “Twa an a hauf oors, W.W.W. Fit ye been dain a’ that time? As if we dinna ken. 🙂 Mind…Aug 24, 21:46
    • Hatey McHateface on You’ll Have Had Your Supper: “Where’s the pish-soaked, jakey tramp in the queue, ranting about hotpot not being available and accusing the boy behind him…Aug 24, 21:39
    • Frank Gillougley on You’ll Have Had Your Supper: “Ur yoo, gaun tae gie me a pruscripshun, fur ma fuckin’ medikayshun?Aug 24, 21:36
    • James on Before Action: ““Post something clever, original or relevant…” You first, Prick.Aug 24, 21:36
    • Hatey McHateface on You’ll Have Had Your Supper: ““decreased income, poor housing” Just as well uncontrolled immigration never contributed to these two. See what you should do, sam.…Aug 24, 21:32
    • Oneliner on You’ll Have Had Your Supper: “My bad – I got her confused with another one (Joani Reid). They all sound the same.Aug 24, 21:31
    • Scotspine on You’ll Have Had Your Supper: “Mealie Chud Alex, Mealie Chud.Aug 24, 21:25
    • Young Lochinvar on You’ll Have Had Your Supper: “Strange how she didn’t mention Messr McCrone to explain how we bought the bulk of all those slightly smaller fish…Aug 24, 21:20
    • Oneliner on You’ll Have Had Your Supper: “Fish supper eh? I thought her man preferred Chinese.Aug 24, 21:09
    • McDuff on You’ll Have Had Your Supper: “Exactly what I believe Willie.Aug 24, 20:59
    • Calum on You’ll Have Had Your Supper: “OMG, I can feel my intelligence shrinking in response to such utter pish. Well done Slab on reminding us that…Aug 24, 20:58
    • sam on You’ll Have Had Your Supper: “https://www.heraldscotland.com/news/homenews/23018965.20-000-excess-deaths-scotland-linked-tory-austerity-policies/ “Scots researchers have calculated that between 2012-2019, almost 335,000 more people died than would have been expected across the…Aug 24, 20:56
    • Confused on You’ll Have Had Your Supper: “They should show someone ordering a fish supper, then getting a spam fritter because the guy in the queue in…Aug 24, 20:56
    • msean on You’ll Have Had Your Supper: “Aye,it pools in London then shared by their rules.We can do better ourselves.Aug 24, 20:54
    • willie on You’ll Have Had Your Supper: “Busted flush of a party bereft of any policy and beholden too to mother Labour Great Britain. The days of…Aug 24, 20:47
    • Hatey McHateface on You’ll Have Had Your Supper: “Good spot. Fuck all about the dualling of the A96 too.Aug 24, 20:41
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