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Archive for the ‘wtf’


Does anyone speak Dugdale? 359

Posted on March 17, 2017 by

Scottish Labour’s regional branch manager (North Britain) clearly thought this was so important she needed to say it twice:

But that’s not helping us make any sense of it. All sarcasm and snark aside, we can’t figure out what on Earth it’s supposed to mean.

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When one plus one is one 186

Posted on March 10, 2017 by

We don’t want to fall into the trap of portraying the Liberal Democrats as a party of any political relevance or consequence in Scotland, but for the sheer comedy value alone Willie Rennie’s interview with Gary Robertson on today’s Good Morning Scotland is worth a couple of minutes of your time.

(Good Morning Scotland, BBC Radio Scotland, 10 March 2017)
.

So, are we all clear?

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The silent trumpet 123

Posted on February 07, 2017 by

We weren’t sure we’d woken up properly when we read this morning’s Times.

trumpet

“Much-trumpeted”? That’s, um, not quite how we remember things.

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The next pages of the script 203

Posted on January 20, 2017 by

It’s morning in America, readers.

booth0

Judge Dredd: Origins was published in 2007, although in fact the basic story of how Bad Bob Booth became the last President of the USA and what he did next was established right back at the 1970s beginnings of Dredd’s parent comic 2000AD.

We actually have a theory that it’s all the Lib Dems’ fault.

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Just following orders 163

Posted on December 08, 2016 by

Reiner Luyken is a 65-year-old German journalist who’s spent more than half of his life in the Highlands, and seems to have a knack for upsetting the neighbours.

luyken2

We’re sure it was just an unfortunate one-off misunderstanding.

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What they expect you to believe 309

Posted on November 25, 2016 by

For some reason the Unionist community has this week been turning the bullhorn up to maximum on the subject of pensions. Most likely provoked by the publication of Dr Craig Dalzell’s fascinating “Beyond GERS”, the usual suspects have returned to the scaremongering tactics deployed during the indyref, attempting to terrorise the elderly with blood-curdling threats of destitution once again.

mcdougallpensions

It’s a bewildering approach, given that the situation regarding pensions is one of the few around independence about which there is known certainty. The UK government already pays the state pension to millions of people outside the UK, under rules which would apply in exactly the same way if Scotland became a “foreign” country.

But just for fun, let’s look at exactly what the situation would be in the monumentally implausible event that Blair McDougall was telling the truth for once.

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The Prophecies 261

Posted on November 23, 2016 by

One of the videos below is a genuine “Better Together” campaign broadcast, pulled from TV at the last minute (despite costing £50,000 to make) and today revealed by Buzzfeed. The other is a spoof we made in June 2014.

Good luck figuring out which is the real one, folks.

Wait, what did we miss? 108

Posted on November 13, 2016 by

You did WHAT in May now?

sldwon

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The China Crisis 315

Posted on November 12, 2016 by

Even seasoned and cynical observers of the Scottish opposition and press such as ourselves, readers, have been rubbing our eyes in startled disbelief this week at the spectacular about-face performed by the aforementioned parties with regard to the Scottish Government’s £10bn Chinese investment “deal” that was never an actual deal, and which may or may not have collapsed.

But today’s Times just about boggled our minds completely.

timeschinaml

Well, who could disagree with that? Who would suggest otherwise?

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The stupidest thing ever said 109

Posted on October 25, 2016 by

We realise that there’s some stiff competition for that accolade, even if you restrict it solely to things said by Kezia Dugdale, but this needs preserving for posterity.

povertyindependence

A couple of questions do spring immediately to mind: (1) how does every country on Earth that isn’t Scotland, Wales or Northern Ireland do it, and (2) given that Scotland has now been in the Union for 309 years, how much longer is it going to take before the two things are finally eradicated?

We look forward to hearing the answers from Labour any day now.

Mathematician Of The Week 111

Posted on October 24, 2016 by

The former Chancellor of the Exchequer in today’s Press & Journal:

darlingcount

55-45 is “far more decisive” than 62-38? We think we’re finally beginning to understand why the last Labour government left the British economy in such a mess.

The Count 274

Posted on October 19, 2016 by

An article by Nick Cohen in the Spectator last night fairly had social media ablaze with a heady brew of anger and mockery.

nickcohenisabawbag

It’s the most extraordinary outpouring of deranged, spittle-flecked arsewash we’ve seen outside of a Daily Express comment thread in a very considerable time, and it merits attention solely because we think it might have broken a world record for the number of empirical falsehoods contained in an article in a respectable media outlet.

Get your clickers out, readers. You’re going to need a fast trigger finger.

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