It’s hard to know where to start on picking apart the torrent of misrepresentations, distortions and flat-out untruths that “Better Together” campaign director Blair McDougall was allowed to get away with in the space of a few short minutes during a rather powder-puff interview on last night’s Scotland Tonight.
So let’s just pick one at random and see how we get on.
A comment from a reader sent us off on a spot of Googling this morning. If you type nothing but the word “Wimbledon” into the search engine, the top result isn’t actually a link, but instead some sort of unclickable wired-in tournament schedule data.
A striking feature of the data is the national flags beside each contestant. We couldn’t help wondering what would happen if we typed in Andy Murray’s name.
Each bright new day brings a fresh game of Spot The Magnus Gardham Headline here at WingsLand Towers, but we were a bit thrown by this morning’s front page.
“Economists say indyref could drive investors away” is pure Magnus, but that four-word qualifier tacked on the end is a bit out of character. What could be going on?
Seasoned readers will be aware of our as-yet-undiscovered mole at “Better Together” campaign headquarters. This morning the intrepid fifth columnist has managed to scan us the cover of the group’s handbook for activists (and forthcoming YouTube movie).
We’re sure more pages will be on the way soon, most days in the papers.
The weekend’s Scotland on Sunday contained another in a long series of doom-laden predictions about the state of an independent Scotland’s defences, including the assertion that current Scottish soldiers would choose to stay with the British armed forces rather than join Scotland’s because it’d be more exciting.
Today’s editorial leader in Scotland on Sunday is really interesting, from a language nerd’s perspective (ie very much on our turf). Entitled “A warning to No campaign”, the column – nominally on the subject of pensions under devolution – purports to criticise said group, noting that “the Better Together campaign, by repeatedly presenting the idea of change as a threat, is doing Scotland no favours.”
A recurring source of amusement for the independence camp is the weekly reader poll in Scotland On Sunday. Time and again the surveys fall victim to deeply-implausible sudden surges in backing for the Unionist option, often in the middle of the night and usually after Yes supporters have drawn attention to less favourable standings.
(The paper’s deputy editor Kenny Farquharson once memorably tried to explain away 25,000 overnight votes – in a poll which had attracted about a tenth that many* in the entire preceding week – as having come from American and Canadian readers, all having inexplicably decided to vote at once on the same day.)
A fairly typical example of the phenomenon, from back in April, can be seen here, but the No campaign’s IT black-ops department appears to have suffered from a bit of an itchy trigger finger this morning and pushed the bounds of credibility a little too far.
There’s an intriguing interview in today’s Sunday Herald with ‘Better Together’ campaign director Blair McDougall (described by the paper as a “Labour apparatchik”), to mark the anniversary of the campaign’s launch. We recommend buying the paper – our digital copy costs just 69p from PressReader – and reading the whole thing, but if you’re pressed for time the last few paragraphs sum up the content pretty accurately.
And if you’re really in a rush, the last two sentences will do.
We’ve got quite the exclusive for you today, folks. We’re indebted to the alert civil servant who’s managed to smuggle out of Whitehall a copy of the UK government’s draft document of its inaugural greetings to the people of an independent Scotland, to be delivered (naturally) by the Foreign Secretary, William Hague.
Given Mr Hague’s recent comments on how “baffling” the very notion of Scottish independence apparently was, readers may find the practical behind-the-scenes reality reassuring. You can read the speech in full below.
This is a genuine request for enlightenment, readers. Hopefully someone can help.
When we’re bored, we like to take a look at the Herald website front page and play Spot The Magnus Gardham Headline. It’s not usually too taxing a game – by way of illustration, we suspect you won’t have too much trouble with this example:
The actual story itself, though, has us bewildered.
Dan on A matter of class: “@Lorna What post of mine are you actually responding to with that wordy spiel? A Ctrl F search of page…” Dec 22, 23:05
Lorncal on A matter of class: “Dan: the problem is that this stuff is not going away any time soon. It has infiltrated every aspect of…” Dec 22, 22:10
Dan on A matter of class: “John Bot sounds a bit weary and lacking in accuracy as it churns out more drivel. A quick refresher, perhaps……” Dec 22, 21:16
agentx on A matter of class: “Alf Baird says: 21 December, 2025 at 2:05 pm Hatey, I assume you have good reason for suggesting that ethnic…” Dec 22, 20:27
Hatey McHateface on A matter of class: “You’ll eat and enjoy the traditional denner (not dinner) of True Scots everywhere: mince.” Dec 22, 20:20
Hatey McHateface on A matter of class: “Sure, Dan, you’ve stated a lot of things, in between the insults, the hair-trigger rants and the potty-mouthed childishness. And…” Dec 22, 20:16
Scot Finlayson on A matter of class: “North Briton`s Judges,everyone a public school twonk, Craig Murray was jailed by Judge for eight months for contempt of court…” Dec 22, 19:52
Dan on A matter of class: “Jesus fuck, if I’d wanted to hear from an arsehole, I’d have farted. But what a sad little bot twat…” Dec 22, 19:41
Hatey McHateface on A matter of class: ““decade’s worth of posts on here on a myriad subjects” Sure, Dan. I don’t doubt that. Just as I don’t…” Dec 22, 19:21
Dan on A matter of class: “Aidan says at 2:09 pm “The bigger picture Dan is that the only thing you seem to be in favour…” Dec 22, 18:32
Hatey McHateface on A matter of class: “Oh dear, Northy. If there are any psychologists reading here they’ll be in no doubt about what ails you. Get…” Dec 22, 17:05
Hatey McHateface on A matter of class: “Hey, Northy, you’ve succeeded in conveying a real sense of hysteria through your prose. If it’s genuine, and not just…” Dec 22, 16:54
Hatey McHateface on A matter of class: “Good one, Sam. “Sovereigntists”. Like it. Throwing a spelling error though. “Sovereign tits” doesn’t, so perhaps that’s what the author…” Dec 22, 16:51
Hatey McHateface on A matter of class: ““Surely any self respecting native Scot would communicate solely in their own language, not that of their oppressor?” This. 100…” Dec 22, 16:45
Insider on A matter of class: “For Christ’s sake ! Will ye just shut up woman and pit ma dinner on !” Dec 22, 16:44
Hatey McHateface on A matter of class: ““Bawbag”, eh, Dan? Let me guess – you’ve packed in the calls for productive dialogue on here as part of…” Dec 22, 16:40
James on A matter of class: ““…I actually worked in industry in the early 80s…” LOL. Aye,right.” Dec 22, 16:29
James Cheyne on A matter of class: “When England went Solo as an English parliament in 1800 so did Scotland, When the monarch of England went Solo…” Dec 22, 16:15
James on A matter of class: “Who’s “we”? LOL. You think anyone reads the shite that you post? What you might think you “know” in your…” Dec 22, 15:57
James Cheyne on A matter of class: “North Code, Scotland does need to wake up, and pretty quick, If England claims only Scotland is bound by the…” Dec 22, 14:29
sam on A matter of class: “https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1111/1467-923X.13214 “Exploring Sovereignty in Scotland” David McCrone Michael Keating “The largest proportion in the sample, 30 per cent are ‘Scottish…” Dec 22, 14:21
Captain Caveman on A matter of class: “I couldn’t care less whether the likes of you believes me or not – as I’ve already told you. Feel…” Dec 22, 14:09
Aidan on A matter of class: “The bigger picture Dan is that the only thing you seem to be in favour of is highest taxes on…” Dec 22, 14:09
Andy Ellis on A matter of class: “@Alf Baird 8.24pm Like any peoples language the Scots language plays ‘a vital role in shaping and defining ethnic identity’,…” Dec 22, 14:07
James on A matter of class: “We’ve only got your word for that though, haven’t we sweetie? You’re a Reform shill so probably a born liar.” Dec 22, 13:53
James Cheyne on A matter of class: “Alf Baird. Even with the trickery, bribery and deceit it must be remembered that the Scottish participation was only set…” Dec 22, 13:48
Captain Caveman on A matter of class: ““A braw chortle at young unionist Aidan whining about the demise of industries in Scotland.” Aw, look at old Dan,…” Dec 22, 13:17
diabloandco on A matter of class: “Just caught up with Led by Donkeys projection on Windsor castle – nice work!! And Nicola Jennings cartoon in the…” Dec 22, 12:33
Northcode on A matter of class: ““Scotland does need to wake up…” She surely does, James. Her bedside alarm is now ringing, at least, and I…” Dec 22, 12:32
Northcode on A matter of class: “I’ve always thought of the word ‘inchoately’ as being a particularly unhelpful word; a word with no clear and singularly…” Dec 22, 12:17