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A revealing turn of phrase 79

Posted on March 25, 2015 by

From an editorial leader in this week’s London Evening Standard:

“The man likely to lead the SNP in Westminster, former party leader Alex Salmond, has made it clear that he is contemplating keeping a minority Labour government in power on a case by case basis. ‘If you hold the balance, then you hold the power,’ he said yesterday.

His price: an end to austerity and to Trident.

Labour leader Ed Miliband has come out fighting against the threat.

Seems to sum it up pretty well.

Against a brick wall 191

Posted on March 25, 2015 by

As readers will know, when professional broadcast journalists can’t or won’t do their jobs properly, we’re not above jumping in ourselves.

So when someone tweeted to tell us that Jim Murphy had just started a phone-in on London station LBC, it seemed an ideal opportunity to quickly ring up and try directly asking him the question that Scottish Labour really, really don’t want to answer.

Here’s what happened.

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We are the 99.982% 52

Posted on March 25, 2015 by

An alert reader pointed us to this edition of Newsnight we’d missed earlier this month, featuring the renowned Conservative Party chairman and liar Grant Shapps MP.

The population of the UK, according to the 2011 census, is 63,128,000. Shapps just told us he only cares about 11,200 of them (or 0.018%), because apparently those are all the votes the Tories need to turn round to secure an absolute majority in May’s general election. We very much doubt that any of the 23 target constituences he mentions, across which the required 11,200 votes are spread, are in Scotland.

And that, readers, is what the Tories (and, for that matter, Labour) really think of “the democratic will of the British people”. You may want to keep it in mind when you vote.

A fundamental misunderstanding 118

Posted on March 25, 2015 by

Because almost nobody in Westminster, whether they’re politicians or the media, ever pays any attention to anything outside SW1A, Alex Salmond’s comment in London yesterday that the SNP would vote against any Tory government in the event of a hung Parliament – which to any Scottish person was news as surprising as a weather forecast for rain – has been greeted with seemingly-genuine shock and horror.

snpthreat

Reporter after reporter has treated the non-revelations (which have been official SNP policy for as long as we can remember, and were stated explicitly by Nicola Sturgeon in November) as a stunning bolt from the blue, and Tory politicians and the right-wing media alike have burst into frothing, spluttering rage, based on the fact that apparently none of them grasps how either the UK electoral system or basic arithmetic work.

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Planet of the twin Suns 87

Posted on March 25, 2015 by

We’re still not tired of these.

thesuns

Although we can’t help thinking that maybe internal email is the more appropriate medium for resolving this particular workplace dispute.

The devil in the details 161

Posted on March 24, 2015 by

We’ve had to illustrate this piece with a tweet from our old chum Duncan Hothersall, because at the time of writing the Scottish Labour account on Twitter has no mention of Labour’s “five point plan”, and nor does the branch office’s website.

5pdunc

And the reason for the absence of any more information is probably that the “plan” is another example of a Labour policy that looks like a tasty boiled egg until you crack its shell and discover that there’s nothing inside.

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A decent start 118

Posted on March 24, 2015 by

Respect to John MacKay of STV, who on last night’s Scotland Tonight asked Labour MSP James Kelly the question this site has called for about whether Labour would stand aside and let the Tories rule if the latter were the largest party after May’s election, but Labour had enough seats to win a confidence vote and form the government with backing from the SNP and/or other parties.

Kelly, unsurprisingly, flapped and blustered and totally evaded it. But then we doubt he has the authority to make the tea in Scottish Labour, let alone speak for the party on key policy issues. If the question isn’t put repeatedly by all of the media to more senior Labour figures until an answer is produced, we’ll be wanting to know why.

More free help for the UK press 387

Posted on March 23, 2015 by

Here’s Ed Miliband, giving a speech this morning to literally at least 20 Labour MPs, Labour MSPs, journalists and possibly a stray member of the public who accidentally walked through the wrong door in Clydebank, a place where Labour leaders used to address gatherings of thousands.

milibank

Unusually, Miliband took a few questions from the hacks, all of whom promptly wasted the opportunity by lobbing completely pointless softballs about coalitions and deals, all of which (a) have been asked a hundred times already, (b) were rendered moot by Alex Salmond on the Marr show yesterday, and (c) were only ever going to be batted away non-committally.

So here’s an actually worthwhile one they can ask instead next time.

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Under pressure 145

Posted on March 22, 2015 by

We have to give Jim Murphy credit – on this week’s Sunday Politics he started off with the subtle, misleading but technically-accurate version of Labour’s line about the “biggest party forming the government”, which involves making the true but irrelevant observation that in the past it’s usually been the case. (Mainly because UK elections almost always give the biggest party a comfortable majority.)

But it only took a couple of minutes of questioning for the Scottish branch manager to lose his cool and resort to the comprehensively debunked flat-out lie again.

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Paddington sequel announced 193

Posted on March 22, 2015 by

Featuring Scotland’s own very special bear.

Wow, Tories. Just wow.

Buyer’s remorse 174

Posted on March 22, 2015 by

We thought you’d enjoy this clip from this morning’s Andrew Marr Show, readers. It came after a very sensible interview, in which Salmond had calmly and reasonably laid out the SNP’s view on events should there be a hung parliament this May with the former First Minister’s party holding the balance of power.

Tory minister Anna Soubry seems to be experiencing a degree of regret about having begged Scots to stay in the UK. The body language says as much as the words.

Is there a doctor in the house? 266

Posted on March 21, 2015 by

Our dear old pal Blair McDougall tweeted this at a minute past midnight today:

brokenleg

Maybe someone can explain it to us.

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    • James on Yelling at the tide: “# Who’d be Hatey?Jan 25, 21:50
    • Southernbystander on Yelling at the tide: “Exactly. Why do people think using lies to justify an argument will work? We have all seen the videos and…Jan 25, 21:37
    • Northcode on Yelling at the tide: ““Were they not still Scots?” Certainly… as Sturgeon is a Scot, and Swinney is a Scot, and Tony Blair is…Jan 25, 21:37
    • DaveL on Yelling at the tide: “Caring Hatey rides again. If anybody had posted about it the chances are you would’ve laughed at them and shit…Jan 25, 21:00
    • Marie on Yelling at the tide: “Looking forward to the mid-terms Mr Brownshirt? You’ll be needing the tissues doll.Jan 25, 20:50
    • Fearghas MacFhionnlaigh on Yelling at the tide: “‘When a Language Won’t Awaken: The Hard Truths of Linguistic Revitalization’ Thanks TURABDIN for the link to this essentially sound,…Jan 25, 20:25
    • sam on Yelling at the tide: “Thanks, Northcode for your answers upthread. Yes, Fergusson and Burns wanted to be more widely read and both had a…Jan 25, 20:08
    • Hatey McHateface on Yelling at the tide: “As we all weep bitter, outraged and angry tears on the worlds most-read Scottish Independence site for the man cut…Jan 25, 20:04
    • Hatey McHateface on Yelling at the tide: “I’m at hame the nicht. But in ma younger days, oan Burns Nicht, we wud always get a few shots…Jan 25, 19:49
    • Hatey McHateface on Yelling at the tide: “Aye, Northy, I hae absaelootly nae doot ye’re a much better poet than Burns ivver was. The langer ye go…Jan 25, 19:45
    • sam on Yelling at the tide: “…so I could put a few shots in him.Jan 25, 19:35
    • Hatey McHateface on Yelling at the tide: “Sure, Alf, it’s racism that I don’t want to lose my livelihood because I’m not fluent in one of Scotland’s…Jan 25, 19:29
    • Hatey McHateface on Yelling at the tide: “Here’s a question, x. Is it true that with widely available apps, it’s possible to make all protagonists involved in…Jan 25, 18:45
    • Northcode on Yelling at the tide: “Here, aw this tak o the braw Scots leid haes pit mi in mind tae write doun anither o ma…Jan 25, 18:45
    • Hatey McHateface on Yelling at the tide: “Bang! Whoops! My bad for startling you. I honestly didn’t think you’d have a wee accident like that. Have some…Jan 25, 18:39
    • agentx on Yelling at the tide: ““Hello love welcome home – how was your day today?” “Just normal darling. My 3 colleagues were holding a guy…Jan 25, 18:38
    • Hatey McHateface on Yelling at the tide: “All to do with colonialism, sam. You’re long overdue to spend a few hours of quality time with Fanny and…Jan 25, 18:36
    • Hatey McHateface on Yelling at the tide: “C’moan, noo, it’s a foregone conclusion. Scotland will win bigly and return home, dripping with gold.Jan 25, 18:32
    • Northcode on Yelling at the tide: “The answer to your first two questions is: “MONEY!” (The mercenary pricks). There was obviously a bigger market for stuff…Jan 25, 18:32
    • sam on Yelling at the tide: “Anent this post Northcode. Some questions. Why did the poets (Roberts) Fergusson and Burns begin to write in both English…Jan 25, 18:10
    • agentx on Yelling at the tide: “Happy Burns Night.Jan 25, 17:58
    • Northcode on Yelling at the tide: ““However, i do agree the ethnolinguistic archeology stage is over… ” Thank fuck… I was a bit concerned that you…Jan 25, 17:26
    • TURABDIN on Yelling at the tide: “….their true language….what a can of worms you open there, more than a can of worms a veritable chasm. However,…Jan 25, 17:02
    • Northcode on Yelling at the tide: “The Scots language is not, by any reckoning, a dead language – nearly half of Scots living in Scotland still…Jan 25, 16:28
    • Marie on Yelling at the tide: “James @1.10pm. Indeed James. McHatee has “form” when it comes to celebrating extra judicial killings.Jan 25, 16:25
    • agentx on Yelling at the tide: “Not for me I have done it many times. (Maybe add a few spaces after your paste)Jan 25, 16:02
    • Alf Baird on Yelling at the tide: ““the few who think like you?” As we know, “colonialism is based on psychology” (Memmi). At least half of Scots…Jan 25, 15:44
    • TURABDIN on Yelling at the tide: “AI is neutral, it is sophisticated technology, but like the simple pencil it may be used to produce the sublime…Jan 25, 14:30
    • Sven on Yelling at the tide: “Sorry “James”, please bear with an old duffer, I’m still not clear on if you feel being curious enough to…Jan 25, 14:25
    • Aidan on Yelling at the tide: “@Alf – do you not feel that you are perpetuating the subjugation of Scotland by continuing to converse in the…Jan 25, 14:23
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