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Taking our breath away

Posted on October 01, 2012 by

You do sometimes have to admire the sheer barefaced chutzpah of Scotland’s Labour MPs and MSPs. Take this solid-gold passage from Douglas Alexander’s speech to the Labour conference today, which he apparently delivered with a straight face:

“Just two years into Government and that’s David Cameron in a nutshell: out of touch at home; out of his depth abroad.

But what’s the Conservatives’ strategy for the EU? Nothing, it’s a blank page.

What’s the Conservatives’ strategy for the G20? Nothing, it’s a blank page.

What’s the Conservatives’ strategy for the WTO? Nothing, it’s a blank page.

What’s the Conservatives’ strategy for NATO? Nothing, it’s a blank page.”

No, you’re not imagining that, folks, it really happened – a senior figure from Scottish Labour genuinely just criticised someone else for having no policies on something, less than a week after his own supposed leader had announced that we’ve got at least two more years to wait before their party will deign let the people of Scotland know what they stand for on any subject at all.

We take our hat off to Wee Dougie. Maybe he can hide his bright red face behind it.

20 to “Taking our breath away”

  1. Davy says:

    It takes decades of barefaced lying to achieve that level of hypocrisy, typical labour politian.

    Reply
  2. Peter A Bell says:

    If you want to know why politicians generally are held in such low regard by the public, look no further than Douglas Alexander.

    Reply
  3. MajorBloodnok says:

    Harsh, but fair.

    Reply
  4. scottish_skier says:

    Are the Tories using the same venue once Labour are finished? Would save them a few bob. Already decked out with union jacks to the max. 

    Even the red (socialism) ties are being dumped increasingly for purple ones. Gone is the yellow of liberal; but then they gave up on that a long time ago.     

    Reply
  5. Betsy says:

    And there it is the extent of Labour’s vision. The tories are bad…the SNP are bad. And that’s it. They stand for nothing other than the pursuit of power. Utterly depressing.

    Reply
  6. Doug Daniel says:

    Douglas Alexander is a special breed of politician. My blog explains what I think of him, although in truth you just need a four-letter word rhyming with “runt”. He’s the most fork-tongued politician going, and his behaviour when he was last on Question Time alongside Nicola Sturgeon showed up what a cretinous little twat he is.

    @s_s – not only is it already decked out, but they can just recycle the speeches too. Just score out “Tories” and write in “Labour” whenever a party is mentioned.

    Reply
  7. scottish_skier says:

    This is a Labour party conference?

    Holy shit.

    link to tinyurl.com

    Last year had the first signs of it, but this year. OMG.       

    Reply
    • Rev. Stuart Campbell says:

      Amazing, isn’t it? Blue backdrop, pastellised Union Jacks everywhere, all traces of red obliterated. Nobody from the 80s or early 90s would believe it.

      Reply
  8. Morag says:

    There was a time, back in the 1990s I think, when they used a weird sort of minty shade for the background.  Inquiring minds were informed that it was “pistachio green”.  This prompted the following to appear in Tom Shields’ Diary.

    The people’s flag’s pistachio green,
    A sicker sight I’ve never seen.
    It isnae quite like Tory blue,
    But in the mean time it will do.

    So raise your gin and tonic high,
    And welcome in the CBI.

    [sorry my memory fails me here]
    We’ll have no red flag flying here.

    They’ve gone the whole hog now, have they?

    ETA: I just googled it. It was 1994.

    Reply
  9. EdinScot says:

    Their hypocriscy is staggering no actually its quite frightening.     I wonder if they are in full knowledge of the parody theyve become and are just throwing caution to the wind in a kind of ‘what the hell; kind of mindset or do they actually beleive theyre all the guff they spout about theirselves in that they really are still on the left and are the greatest thing since sliced bread.  Scary people either way in my book!  Their split personality isnt even  worth their comedy value its quite stomach churning and should  come with a proper government health warning. 

    Sadly i was unfortunate enough to witness wee Dougie’s propaganda broadcast from his red Tory party conference on Labour state television formerly known as BBC Scotland on the sunday politics show where he ranted uninterrupted forever pleaded with Isobel Fraser to ‘let him speak’  as he tried and failed to save Lamont and his new Tory party further permanent damage.  A  shambles.
     

    Reply
  10. YesYesYes says:

    @scottish_skier,
     
    I wouldn’t advise anyone to tune in to the red Tory conference this week. I’ve seen mair life in a morgue.
     
    You know they’re speaking, you can see their lips move, and you can hear echoes of their new public management speak but, for the life of me, I can’t remember a single word any of them have said so far –  it’s just like listening to the Lib Dems. It’s so politically unthreatening, it’s scary.
     
    For the Scottish Labour contingent, the task this week is straightforward. Like Alex and Ariane in the film, ‘Goodbye Lenin’, who had to persuade their grandmother that, after she awoke from her coma (during which the Berlin wall had been pulled down), communism was still thriving, they have to persuade Ed Miliband that the remote northern outpost of Scotlandshire is still safe in Scottish Labour’s hands. Poor Ed, he doesn’t know what’s in store for him when he wakes up. 

    Reply
  11. Erchie says:

    What are the qualifications of the Alexander twins to public office?
     
    What deep experience and broad ranging skill set make them suited?
     
    Oh aye, their dad was pals with Donald Dewar

    Reply
  12. Dcanmore says:

    Apologies if you have seen this before, I published it on NNS comments.
     
    Just look at wee Dougie’s track record…
    1988 … worked for Dukasis’ Presidential Election campaign. (failure)
    1990 … speechwriter for Gordon Brown. (make the coffee)
    1993 … worked as a solicitor for six months. (gave up)
    1995 … failed to get elected at the Perth and Kinross by-election. (failure)
    1997 … failed to get elected for Perth constituency at General Election. (failure)
    1997 … parachuted into Labour safe seat of Paisley South. (Gordon Brown-nosing does get you somewhere)
    2001 … held the Labour safe seat of Paisley South (surprise)
    2001 … appointed Minister of State at the Dept of Industry by Blair as a reward for his involvement in the 2001 election campaign. (sook)
    2003 … promoted to Minister for the Cabinet Office and the Duchy of Lancaster (get connected)
    2004 … moved to Minister of State and Trade. (future directorships)
    2005 … held the Labour safe seat of Paisley South. (did he turn up?)
    2005 … became a member of the Privy Council. (future knighthood in the bag)
    2006 … appointed Secretary of State for Transport and Scotland. (okay somebody has to do it)
    2007 … control of Scottish Labour election campaign. (failure)
    2007 … after Brown becomes Prime Minister Alexander is appointed Secretary of State for International Development. (remember me the coffee boy)
    2010 … held the Labour safe seat for Paisley South. (thanks plebs)
    2010 … appointed Shadow Secretary of State for Work and Pensions. (rather be in a Gulag)
    2011 … appointed Shadow Foreign Secretary. (that’s more like it)

    He has voted FOR: Foundation Trust Hospitals; Trust Schools; Government Control Orders outwith courts; ID Cards; Iraq invasion; Nuclear Power; Post Office closures; new anti-terrorism laws; Trident replacement and university tuition fees… but don’t call him a Tory.

    SPLOOSH into the trough he goes, successful through association and firmly up the arse of the British Establishment. Not too bad for an empty suit. Can anybody really remember what this guy has actually achieved in government in or out? Won’t be long before he’s off to the House of Lords Sir Dougie.

    link to publicwhip.org.uk

    Reply
  13. Appleby says:

    Astonishing. We’re through the looking glass.

    Reply
  14. Stuart M says:

    @dcanomore:
    from Dougie’s CV, you’ve missed :
    2010 – Coordinator for Labour’s General Election campaign (failure)
    2010 – joint campaign manager for David Miliband’s leadership campaign (failure)
    You may begin to note a pattern…

    Reply
  15. Luigi says:

    The fact that Douglas Alexander and Jim Murphy are considered to be the big hitters of Scottish Labour tells you all you need to know about the state of the party. Any member of the SNP B team could wipe the floor with these jokers.

    Reply
  16. Arbroath 1320 says:

    Ah that nice wee fella Dougie Alexander. Doesn’t he have a wee sister, oh that’s right wee Bendy Wendy. She resigned her position as Labour “leader” in Holyrood. I guess she couldn’t take the continual put downs from wee ‘Eck!
     
    As Dcanmore clearly shows, he is a walking FAILURE.
    Nice to see that he has done “some” work in the REAL world. SIX months as a solicitor WOW! I guess the reality of doing REAL work got too much for him then.
     
    Nice to see that he doesn’t like being questioned too closely by anyone, especially Isobel Fraser, about Lamont’s plans for the future of Scotland. Just as well he wasn’t being questioned about anything serious then!

    Reply
  17. scottish_skier says:

    Canny help hersel.

    link to bbc.co.uk 

    I wonder if they’ll use the blue background. Would make for a crackin pic. 

    Reply
  18. MajorBloodnok says:

    Interesting BBC article – and a useful few bubble bursting paragraphs at the end.  I like that Carwyn Jones – he’s a very useful stick to poke Lamont with.

    When Gary Robertson was interviewing her this morning on GMS he did raise this issue and her response was that they can have free prescriptions in Wales because they have to pay tuition fees (equivalent value?  I doubt it).  She also more or less admitted that she wanted to bring back means testing. He also challenged her on the fact that Ian Murray MP had questioned why the SG wouldn’t cut income tax by a penny “to stimulate the economy”.  She said this was all part of the debate that the SNP were refusing to have.  Bonkers.

    Speaking of Ian Murray, I saw him smirking to himself walking through Bruntsfield last night.  I knew it was him becuase you don’t often see wee guys in grey suits wearing red ties in our part of the world.

    Reply
  19. Doug Daniel says:

    Here’s Johann’s new hat, which she can wear while addressing a handful of people in front of a blue background.

    link to t.co

    Reply


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