Because almost nobody in Westminster, whether they’re politicians or the media, ever pays any attention to anything outside SW1A, Alex Salmond’s comment in London yesterday that the SNP would vote against any Tory government in the event of a hung Parliament – which to any Scottish person was news as surprising as a weather forecast for rain – has been greeted with seemingly-genuine shock and horror.
Reporter after reporter has treated the non-revelations (which have been official SNP policy for as long as we can remember, and were stated explicitly by Nicola Sturgeon in November) as a stunning bolt from the blue, and Tory politicians and the right-wing media alike have burst into frothing, spluttering rage, based on the fact that apparently none of them grasps how either the UK electoral system or basic arithmetic work.
We’ve had to illustrate this piece with a tweet from our old chum Duncan Hothersall, because at the time of writing the Scottish Labour account on Twitter has no mention of Labour’s “five point plan”, and nor does the branch office’s website.
And the reason for the absence of any more information is probably that the “plan” is another example of a Labour policy that looks like a tasty boiled egg until you crack its shell and discover that there’s nothing inside.
Respect to John MacKay of STV, who on last night’s Scotland Tonight asked Labour MSP James Kelly the question this site has called for about whether Labour would stand aside and let the Tories rule if the latter were the largest party after May’s election, but Labour had enough seats to win a confidence vote and form the government with backing from the SNP and/or other parties.
Kelly, unsurprisingly, flapped and blustered and totally evaded it. But then we doubt he has the authority to make the tea in Scottish Labour, let alone speak for the party on key policy issues. If the question isn’t put repeatedly by all of the media to more senior Labour figures until an answer is produced, we’ll be wanting to know why.
Here’s Ed Miliband, giving a speech this morning to literally at least 20 Labour MPs, Labour MSPs, journalists and possibly a stray member of the public who accidentally walked through the wrong door in Clydebank, a place where Labour leaders used to address gatherings of thousands.
Unusually, Miliband took a few questions from the hacks, all of whom promptly wasted the opportunity by lobbing completely pointless softballs about coalitions and deals, all of which (a) have been asked a hundred times already, (b) were rendered moot by Alex Salmond on the Marr show yesterday, and (c) were only ever going to be batted away non-committally.
So here’s an actually worthwhile one they can ask instead next time.
We have to give Jim Murphy credit – on this week’s Sunday Politics he started off with the subtle, misleading but technically-accurate version of Labour’s line about the “biggest party forming the government”, which involves making the true but irrelevant observation that in the past it’s usually been the case. (Mainly because UK elections almost always give the biggest party a comfortable majority.)
But it only took a couple of minutes of questioning for the Scottish branch manager to lose his cool and resort to the comprehensively debunked flat-out lie again.
We thought you’d enjoy this clip from this morning’s Andrew Marr Show, readers. It came after a very sensible interview, in which Salmond had calmly and reasonably laid out the SNP’s view on events should there be a hung parliament this May with the former First Minister’s party holding the balance of power.
Tory minister Anna Soubry seems to be experiencing a degree of regret about having begged Scots to stay in the UK. The body language says as much as the words.
Alf Baird on Irony you can’t buy: ““Tony Blair was born in Edinburgh and Gordon Brown was born in Giffnock” So that makes three centuries of colonial…” Mar 22, 17:30
Young Lochinvar on Irony you can’t buy: “Agentx JBG clearly means forthwith. Anyway; Teflon Tone survived so long as he made himself more English than the English…” Mar 22, 17:28
agentx on Irony you can’t buy: ““That being the case London will make sure that there will NEVER ever be a PM who is a SCOT”…” Mar 22, 16:54
James on Irony you can’t buy: “It is not a derogatory racist term as ‘scot free’ has zero to do with Scots or Scotland, see posts…” Mar 22, 16:09
sam on Irony you can’t buy: “Yes, Andy. The majority of people in Ireland (south of border), around 66% favour reunification. Their wishes are likely to…” Mar 22, 14:48
James Barr Gardner on Irony you can’t buy: ““Scotland is entirely FREE to leave only if its granted by the PM @ Westminster”. That being the case London…” Mar 22, 14:40
Geri on Irony you can’t buy: “What we need is a revolution & a spot of regime change. Forget Ayatollahs – we’ve got the fckn parasitic…” Mar 22, 14:24
Confused on Irony you can’t buy: “why? https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2026/03/21/drilling-north-sea-answer-energy-crisis/ – surely the city, being the engine of wealth creation, can solve all problems via the free market…” Mar 22, 13:05
Sven on Irony you can’t buy: “Mark Beggan @ 09.49. Twinkle, Twinkle, little star. I don’t wonder what you are. I surmised your spot in space…” Mar 22, 12:14
Northcode on Irony you can’t buy: “Could Sturgeon be a plagiarist? The quote “If everything is a scandal, nothing is.” is attributed to Mary Anne MacLeod…” Mar 22, 12:04
Andy Ellis on Irony you can’t buy: “even if NI wanted a border poll it down to the PM granting it even though its state they can…” Mar 22, 11:57
Northcode on Irony you can’t buy: “Professor Aileen Mcharg is English and a unionist (colonist if preferred… same thing)… so not much point in listening to…” Mar 22, 11:38
100%Yes on Irony you can’t buy: “George Galloway, maybe the only person to show the Labour supporters who want Independence that voting for the SNP is…” Mar 22, 11:34
100%Yes on Irony you can’t buy: “Aidan, I couldn’t post to you above as there was no reply option. Reading between the lines the SNP leadership/SG…” Mar 22, 11:20
Mark Beggan on Irony you can’t buy: “And when the Lefty’s were thrown down into hell. They cried! ” Lord forgive us we didny Ken” And the…” Mar 22, 10:56
agentx on Irony you can’t buy: ““William George Walker (SNP politician) A case was brought against Walker and was heard at Edinburgh Sheriff Court on nine…” Mar 22, 10:56
Northcode on Irony you can’t buy: ““So Scotland Independence hopes within the UK system is dead…” Such hopes were never alive, such hopes were never real,…” Mar 22, 10:48
Geri on Irony you can’t buy: “That is wrong. Scotland is a sovereign nation & there were preconditions before the Act of Union ever took place.…” Mar 22, 10:35
agentx on Irony you can’t buy: “Scottish Oath Taken: King Charles III took the statutory oath to uphold the Presbyterian Church of Scotland at the inaugural…” Mar 22, 10:29
Geri on Irony you can’t buy: “Instead of watching baby Trump maybe you should educate yourself. Iraq had emptied its war chest being a proxy for…” Mar 22, 10:24
Northcode on Irony you can’t buy: “An alien spacecraft from another world did not crash land in America’s Area 51. The Illuminati is not a sinister…” Mar 22, 10:08
Mark Beggan on Irony you can’t buy: “Blue blue windows behind the stars. Yellow moon on the rise. Big Missiles flying across the sky. Throwing shadows on…” Mar 22, 09:49
Aidan on Irony you can’t buy: “You’re right 100% Yes – the only route to Scottish independence within the UK’s legal system is for an act…” Mar 22, 09:36
Cynicus on Irony you can’t buy: “sam says: 22 March, 2026 at 7:46 am “Ye cannae spell. Loser” ========== How do you know that?” Mar 22, 08:43
100%Yes on Irony you can’t buy: “What surprised me was the audience actually clapping Professor Aileen Mcharg, when she was stating clearly that Scotland had no…” Mar 22, 08:40
twathater on Irony you can’t buy: “Geri, Joanna is another one who sat on her arse and said fuck all about what was going on under…” Mar 22, 03:30
twathater on Irony you can’t buy: ““Thatcher was a necessary evil, presumably you didnt live in pre-Thatcher times” There speaks a good old tory with his…” Mar 22, 03:18
Mark Beggan on Irony you can’t buy: “That comment. Or was it a rant. No one knows. I never read it but it proves that AI is…” Mar 21, 23:16
