As readers may already be aware, my main hobby to distract myself from my day job in the profoundly depressing world of politics is to delve into retro videogaming via my Retropie. It’s an endlessly rewarding fount of discovery and entertainment for many reasons, but sometimes the two spheres collide in extremely unexpected ways.
So let’s talk about GORF.
Midway’s 1981 arcade hit was a pioneering and innovative game. It was the first game to be comprised of multiple highly distinct sub-games, boldly including direct lifts of other people’s coin-ops in the form of Space Invaders and Galaxian. And while it wasn’t the first arcade game to feature synthesised speech – it was beaten to that punch by the likes of Berzerk and Wizard Of Wor the previous year – it was famous for the extensive and iconic vocabulary with which it taunted and goaded the player.
It got numerous conversions of variable quality to various home systems, whether as contemporary licences or later homebrew ports, and that’s where we come in.
It’s taken me four weeks to write this, because I barely knew where to start.
Channel 4 showed the singular and vastly wonderful The Banshees Of Inisherin at the weekend, and as brilliant as it is in its own right, it also came loaded with all sorts of resonances and finally prodded me into action.
The equally singular and wonderful Jonathan Nash, who will be known to readers of this isolated and quiet island parish under a variety of names, died last month, of death. It was sudden yet expected, and in those respects very much the opposite of the man himself.
The Spectrum community is arguably more on top of the machine’s history than any other in the world of gaming, so it’s always quite noteworthy when something and/or someone escapes its notice entirely. And so it is with Lukasz Kur.
The screenshot above is of a game called a_e Adventure, or sometimes a_e in King Chrum’s Gold Mines. (According to Kur the character’s name represents “a portion of a forum member’s user name which inadvertantly looked like an emoticon of sorts – a little face with asymetrical eyes.”)
This page lists the various contract tariffs for the imminent iPhone 4S on O2. If you add them up, you get some pretty strange results.
(For the purposes of these calculations, we've worked out the total cost for the term of a 12-month contract, including a £6 "Bolt-On" for 500MB of data, and based on purchasing the 64GB model.)
Not least because I essentially don’t give a shit about the environment. (The result depicted in the image below is from Scottish Vote Compass, and my non-Scotch chums might find it interesting to take the test too.)
I do believe human activities are causing global warming, and that we’re rendering the planet incapable of sustaining human life at a terrifying rate – via greenhouse gases, pollution and overpopulation – to the point where mankind could in my view have well under 100 years left of anything recognisable as our current lifestyle. It’s just that I think that’s a good thing.
Hatey McHateface on The Land Of No Laws: “So is this a good week to be looking to restore the Stuarts to the throne, Confused? You know you…” May 18, 18:59
Hatey McHateface on The Land Of No Laws: ““It’s not the eighteenth century any more” Quite a lot of the time, on Wings BTL, it is. As Northy…” May 18, 18:40
twathater on The Land Of No Laws: “YL I wish people in Scotland had the same enthusiasm and desire for independence as they do about fucking football…” May 18, 18:14
Dan on The Land Of No Laws: “You should try to get along to Knockhill racing circuit and support Scottish motorsport. There’s just been an excellent weekend…” May 18, 15:06
Mark Beggan on The Land Of No Laws: “The Special Needs Party are to scared to condem the Celtic Thugs. Well let me condem them. Scum!” May 18, 13:24
Fearghas MacFhionnlaigh on The Land Of No Laws: “Stuart Campbell writes: THE LAND OF NO LAWS: « But every single person reading this knows that despite the situations…” May 18, 13:03
Confused on The Land Of No Laws: “Hearts are identifying as “trans champions” and holyrood is issuing them a certificate. – there’s a lot of folks “clutching…” May 18, 12:54
Owen Mullions on The Land Of No Laws: “I may be wrong but I don’t think the clock is stopped after a goal is scored so the 30…” May 18, 12:48
Alf Baird on The Land Of No Laws: ““without England’s help we’d have remained a religiously-intolerant backwater.” Should that not read: “with England’s help we remain a religiously-intolerant…” May 18, 12:44
Northcode on The Land Of No Laws: “Since there’s fuckall going on in here I thought I’d follow my last braw comment with a mair chirpy upbeat…” May 18, 12:26
Northcode on The Land Of No Laws: “Ken McGoogan offers a balanced view without ever retreating into neutrality. His work is honest, evidence?driven, and capable of holding…” May 18, 12:06
David Ferguson on The Land Of No Laws: “You claim to be a ref and you appear to know nothing of the laws of the game. The clock…” May 18, 11:56
David Ferguson on The Land Of No Laws: “Here’s an alternative scenario from Saturday: Ni-nil going into eight minutes of added time. 1 substitution and four yellow cards…” May 18, 11:19
Maxxmacc on The Land Of No Laws: “I used to watch Formula 1 until it became obvious that Sky TV were gerrymandering the races to ensure the…” May 18, 11:00
Bilbo on The Land Of No Laws: “Don’t want to be hitting on Glasgow but the city is finished. The main attraction of Glasgow was shopping and…” May 18, 07:52
Willie on The Land Of No Laws: “A most topical article by the Rev. And many very interesting comments thereafter too. Football most certainly invokes popular interest…” May 18, 07:33
Robert Hughes on The Land Of No Laws: “hahahahahaha what joy, seeing all the Glesga haters trying desperately to undermine/tarnish Celtic’s brilliant late season recovery and ultimate League…” May 18, 06:55
GM on The Land Of No Laws: “The richest club in Scotland by a massive distance and that’s 15 out of 16 titles in a row. 15…” May 18, 00:22
william G Walker on The Land Of No Laws: “JAMBO of Hearts says that “there are only three inavoidable rules in life – death, taxes and the Scottish Football…” May 17, 23:01
sarah on The Land Of No Laws: “I’m happy with facts, Martin! Truth is essential in all things. I saw a graphic which was showing the leading…” May 17, 22:48
Young Lochinvar on The Land Of No Laws: “Lighten up folks! I reckon the “chaps” going for a Saturday afternoon stroll onto the pitch might perhaps be discouraged…” May 17, 22:29
Owen Mullions on The Land Of No Laws: “He didn’t cut it short though. There were 30 seconds left when Celtic scored and the clock doesn’t stop when…” May 17, 22:04
Red on The Land Of No Laws: “A scunner of a game. I don’t think Celtic FC realises how unpopular they’ve become with neutral Scots. The neddery…” May 17, 21:25
John from Fife on The Land Of No Laws: “PS. The SEA have apologised for hearts not being awarded a penalty against Motherwell. If the had been given it…” May 17, 20:44
Northcode on The Land Of No Laws: “Yes, you are correct — Herman argues that the Scots invented the modern world, but, as you say, he also…” May 17, 20:42
Martin on The Land Of No Laws: “Except that isn’t true and it depends entirely on the remaining home or away fixtures owed. Celtic despite being top…” May 17, 20:21
Martin on The Land Of No Laws: “He didn’t cut it short. 45 minutes at a minimum were played both halves. Time added in added time is,…” May 17, 20:18
Martin on The Land Of No Laws: “2 seasons ago the added time directive from UEFA came out, concerned about how little ball on play time there…” May 17, 20:15
Martin on The Land Of No Laws: “Sorry Stu, but you’re wrong. The laws you quoted are for normal time. The clock doesn’t stop with goals and…” May 17, 20:03
