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Archive for the ‘videogames’


Manic Minoer 6

Posted on March 03, 2011 by

or Why The iPhone Is The New Amiga, Part 17.

Minotron 2112 was released today (at the time of writing an iTunes or App Store search for "minotron" doesn't bring it up, but if instead you search for "llamasoft" it's there), the second outing for Jeff Minter's game-in-a-month Minotaur Project after the flawed but fun Minotaur Rescue.

(Which incidentally is apparently about to have many of the issues raised in the WoSland review – or "moaning", as Mr Minter refers to user feedback – fixed in a just-submitted update.)

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The worst videogame ever made 33

Posted on February 10, 2011 by

Ask a thousand people what the best videogame of all time is and you’ll only get back a tiny handful of names (with variants) – Super Mario, Half-Life, Grand Theft Auto, Call Of Duty, Naughty Ones, all the usual suspects. But ask the same thousand people what the worst game ever is and you’ll get a thousand different answers.

It’s time someone stood up and made a decision.

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It happened here 4

Posted on February 09, 2011 by

Does anyone recognise these two fine figures of chaps puzzling over how to deal with their recycling backlog? You know them well.

If you can't work it out from the plentiful clues found in the pic, click below to reveal the SHOCKING TRUTH!

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This is Free-App Hero 30

Posted on February 07, 2011 by

Many of you will know about this already, but for various reasons it's never actually been made official before now. Friends, colleagues, alert WoSblog viewers and the world in general, please welcome into your hearts and minds the infinite majesty of Free-App Hero.

Free-App Hero is an App Store tracker app with a difference – it delivers hundreds of fantastic free games without wasting your time with any of the thousands and thousands of terrible ones. Who wouldn't want that?

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Fuck the gameplay – feel the cardboard! 23

Posted on December 18, 2010 by

The funny thing about WoSblog’s recent Gran Turismo 5 piece (at the time of writing by far the most-read individual post in WB history, although the various Benchmark Reviews bits added together outstrip it by miles as the single most popular topic), is that everyone took it as being mostly an attack on Eurogamer, which was never really the intention.

This is, though.

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Who sexually abused Steve Jobs? 24

Posted on December 16, 2010 by

Come on. It must have been one of you, or someone you know, and it’s time to own up. Because until we deal with this serious issue and reach some sort of closure, Jobs is going to keep taking it out on the rest of us.

There’s simply no other remotely plausible explanation for the staggering hostility – no, make that absolute naked loathing – with which Apple continues to treat the hundreds of millions of customers who’ve made it so rich.

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The unspoken truth about Gran Turismo 5 31

Posted on November 24, 2010 by

Gran Turismo 5 is finally out! (Or possibly almost finally out!) Woo! It’s no more than four or five years late! And worth every minute!

I haven’t played it, obviously. But there’s something you should know.

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On review scoring 23

Posted on August 01, 2010 by

It's one of the most-observed truths of videogame reviewing that the entire concept of scoring is, as practised almost universally in all forms of current print, broadcast and online media, fundamentally broken.

Everyone knows that the marks awarded in game reviews – whether out of five stars, ten points or 100% – are not in fact sequential numbers as we were taught them in arithmetic lessons, but abstract ciphers whose true value is heavily encoded. In videogame reviewing, 4 isn't any bigger than 2, 6=7, and 10 is more than twice as many as 9.

And therefore – since the sole and entire point of scoring is to attach an instantly comprehensible numerical summary of the reviewer's opinion to the text – videogame review scores are functionally almost meaningless.

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Why metagaming is the only true gaming 4

Posted on June 19, 2010 by

Anyone who's been reading WoS or WoSblog for any amount of time will probably already have noticed that I have very little time for videogames that want to tell stories.

There are plenty of fields of culture available already for people who want to be told stories. Books, films, comics, TV,  theatre and even music are all ideally suited to story-telling, and frequently do a brilliant job of it. You wouldn't hire a footballer to come round and do your plumbing, so why would you look to videogames for storytelling?

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Why Tetris isn’t a puzzle game 10

Posted on March 31, 2010 by

It's weird how bad people are at looking even a tiny bit below the surface. All you have to do is quietly mention in passing somewhere that Tetris, Columns, Bejeweled or any of their millions of clones and derivatives aren't actually "puzzle games", and all hell breaks loose.

Even nowadays, with a resurgence in indie games making abstract graphics (relatively) popular again, most gamers angrily insist that if something doesn't look like a traditional spaceship, it can't be a spaceship.

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The least appropriate use of ‘Finally’ ever 3

Posted on March 03, 2010 by

Is this okay, or really really not very okay at all? I just can’t tell.

“Finally a SNIPER game where you play as a soviet soldier to help liberate the Auschwitz Nazi concentration camp!”

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The strange death of emulation 5

Posted on February 26, 2010 by

The PSP? Hwurgh! What is it good for?

Absolutely some things! Say it again!

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    • sam on There May Be Justice: “sarah, The former Irish President, Michael Higgins said, “Our diaspora is one of Ireland’s greatest resources: through the contribution our…” Oct 9, 11:43
    • Hatey McHateface on There May Be Justice: “Now that Davey Paulden’s been put back in his box, the odds of an early WM GE have shortened. Plenty…” Oct 9, 09:49
    • Aidan on There May Be Justice: ““Professor Baird has knowledge of Scottish political issues, academic qualifications and long experience of maritime business. His involvement in the…” Oct 9, 09:38
    • Hatey McHateface on There May Be Justice: “@ Alan Austin says: 9 October, 2026 at 8:30 am “Your response is actually factually incorrect” Hmmm. I believe the…” Oct 9, 09:05
    • Captain Caveman on There May Be Justice: “😀 Imagine thinking Alf Baird is the answer to Scotland’s manifold woes – and is a shoe-in for leading the…” Oct 9, 09:04
    • Hatey McHateface on There May Be Justice: ““GlobalScot has more than 1,000 members across 62 countries (in 2021) supporting Scottish businesses in international markets and attracting inward…” Oct 9, 08:48
    • Alan Austin on There May Be Justice: “Your response is actually factually incorrect. Large oil Companies invest based on RONCE which is return on net capital employed.…” Oct 9, 08:30
    • Hatey McHateface on There May Be Justice: “@ Minceheid says: 9 October, 2026 at 7:54 am Thanks for the idea. But I think you’re overlooking something. When…” Oct 9, 08:24
    • Hatey McHateface on There May Be Justice: “Aye, sarah, it’s amazing hoo mony of us ken real colonisers. Ah hae a couple of rellies in Nova Scotia.…” Oct 9, 08:15
    • Minceheid on There May Be Justice: “Hatey McHateface says: 8 October, 2026 at 7:07 pm I’m having beans on toast for ma denner and I hate…” Oct 9, 07:54
    • sarah on There May Be Justice: “@ sam at 8.18. GlobalScot sounds a great organisation. You are right – the Scottish diaspora will help. Every Canadian…” Oct 8, 22:29
    • sam on There May Be Justice: “The Scots diaspora is likely to be a big help to a newly independent Scotland just as the Irish diaspora…” Oct 8, 20:18
    • Hatey McHateface on There May Be Justice: ““everything that happens in a colony is due to colonialism” I’m starting to come around to your way of thinking,…” Oct 8, 19:07
    • Hatey McHateface on There May Be Justice: ““the North Sea no longer has any oil that is economic to produce” It’s a fact not widely understood that…” Oct 8, 18:54
    • Hatey McHateface on There May Be Justice: ““you vote the useless shower out. We simply can’t do that to Westminster, the more alert of you may have…” Oct 8, 18:39
    • factchecker on There May Be Justice: “Fair comment, I think, Rob I can only see one way – vote the SNP out. Abstaining/spoiling a ballot paper…” Oct 8, 18:24
    • Alf Baird on There May Be Justice: ““You grab independence so you have all the levers to make things better” Indeed so. A colonized people have no…” Oct 8, 18:12
    • am firinn on There May Be Justice: “Sarah is right. The idea that you have to set up a perfect administration before you thrown off the shackles…” Oct 8, 17:44
    • Rob on There May Be Justice: “You would trust the current mob in any way at all, I think they make even Westminster look good and…” Oct 8, 17:40
    • Alan Austin on There May Be Justice: “The mines closed because the coal was not economic against oil so the miners lost thier jobs due to economics.…” Oct 8, 17:17
    • Aidan on The Love Of Big Brother: “@“James” – if you want some peace and quiet why don’t you log off the library computer and go and…” Oct 8, 16:50
    • factchecker on There May Be Justice: “sarah says: 8 October, 2026 at 2:44 pm Stay in the false union until we find better local administration? What…” Oct 8, 16:33
    • Aidan on There May Be Justice: “If you listen to Sam, insider, one of them could be our very own Alf Baird!” Oct 8, 15:58
    • Onlooker on There May Be Justice: “Thank you.” Oct 8, 15:48
    • Insider on There May Be Justice: “o.k. sarah! Spill the beans! Who are these honest,trustworthy,capable,inspiring leaders who will magically appear if Scotland becomes independent ? Where…” Oct 8, 15:12
    • sarah on There May Be Justice: “Stay in the false union until we find better local administration? What a very strange position to take.” Oct 8, 14:44
    • Aidan on There May Be Justice: “There are only two countries in the world with double or more GDP than the U.K. – USA 7.7x and…” Oct 8, 14:10
    • sam on There May Be Justice: “Source is BBC and UK government “England’s surface waters face significant chemical pollution challenges, with legacy substances like heavy metals…” Oct 8, 13:38
    • Hatey McHateface on There May Be Justice: “Exactly, Rob. We’ve had a number of examples since 2014 when it’s the WM government and the UK Supreme Court…” Oct 8, 13:06
    • Rob on There May Be Justice: “So we have two bad governors, one in Westminster and one in Holyrood. Removing Westminster, which on balance does less…” Oct 8, 12:40
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