Labour MP John Mann has now given his account of yesterday’s goings-on around a misattributed quote in the Sunday Times and Herald. You can read it on his website, or look at this conveniently-located screenshot (click to supersize) instead:
Speaking as writers we’re especially impressed by the fifth paragraph’s use of no fewer than SIX exclamation marks after a single word. But it’s the next bit, and in particular the section we’ve highlighted in the image above, that’s rather more concerning.
It’s Monday morning, so rather than have an “And finally…” tonight we thought we’d cheer you up ahead of the grimmest day of the week with a couple of completely genuine unPhotoshopped images from this morning’s BBC Breakfast.
We’d love to imagine this was a satirical “accident”.
We hate to harp on. But it may be that there are still some people stuck in a cave somewhere in the Hebrides who think Johann Lamont is the “leader” of a political party called “Scottish Labour” rather than a regional branch manager of one based in London, and who imagine that the findings of her commission on devolution – should there actually be any before the referendum – will become official Labour policy.
The Labour Party’s clinging to the pretence of a commitment to multilateral nuclear disarmament is perhaps the most cynical of all the lies it still tells the electorate, on either side of the border. This weekend, as thousands of protesters congregate in Glasgow, Labour activists are mounting a frantic rearguard action pretending that independence and Trident are unconnected issues.
But the feeble smokescreen with which the party attempts to conceal the truth could be blown away by an asthmatic bee. It shouldn’t take too long to run through the logic.
We haven’t heard any more from Ian Taylor’s lawyers yet. But in a surprising development never previously observed on the internet, his attempt to silence various pro-independence voices appears to have resulted in people digging deeper into the affairs of Vitol, the oil-trading company of which he’s been Chief Executive since 1995.
One particularly interesting revelation that we don’t think was covered in any of the earlier articles relates to the company’s conduct in the Republic of the Congo, where they got up to shenanigans a little shadier than simply drinking all the Um Bongo.
There’s an old maxim that serves all writers well: “Perfection is when there’s nothing left to take away”. With that in mind, let’s see how few words we can render the complex issue of the future of welfare in the UK in.
But in case those aren’t enough, we’ll expand just a little.
(The next-biggest donator, author CJ Sansom, sent their £161,000 cheque from their home in Sussex, which we’re fairly sure also isn’t in Scotland.)
We’ve dropped Mr Sheridan a line asking if he finds non-Scottish-resident, tax-avoiding Ian Taylor’s huge donation to the No campaign “nauseating”. We’ll let you know his answer the minute it arrives, which surely won’t be long.
We were a little mystified, on watching last night’s newsgasm about Margaret Thatcher, to see the degree to which Tories were suddenly punting the ancient Labour line about the SNP being somehow responsible for her becoming Prime Minister in 1979, and therefore by implication for everything that happened subsequently.
Alan Cochrane of the Telegraph, Michael Forsyth and Ruth Davidson have all been enthusiastically joining the usual parade of absurd Labour pantomime sorts like Lord Foulkes over the last 24 hours or so, which struck us as a mildly odd joint bit of anti-independence smearing, reliant as it is on people not realising that the two parties are cynically colluding while making diametrically opposite points.
We don’t think the electorate is quite that dim, though of course it’s never wise to overestimate people who would repeatedly elect Michael Forsyth and George Foulkes in the first place. So we’re just going to leave this here:
Attentive readers will of course recall the shocking revelations from the No campaign earlier this year about the terrifying cost of independence to Scots – £1 a head. But what’s the latest info on the price of staying in the UK?
Glorying in the death of an individual is unseemly, especially one long past the time when they did their damage. Owen Jones put it well here. Today, though, with no shame whatsoever, we celebrate the death of an icon. Not the human being, but the values they stood for and their appalling toxic legacy of what was once a country one could be proud of being a part of.
That country died in 1979, and its corpse was dug up and desecrated in 1997. Nothing we could say, no matter how awful, would be a tenth as despicable as the changes wrought in Britain over those last 34 years. So we’re going to say nothing, and play a song with words that are impossible to make out. You might prefer some others.
Northcode on Irony you can’t buy: “An alien spacecraft from another world did not crash land in America’s Area 51. The Illuminati is not a sinister…” Mar 22, 10:08
Mark Beggan on Irony you can’t buy: “Blue blue windows behind the stars. Yellow moon on the rise. Big Missiles flying across the sky. Throwing shadows on…” Mar 22, 09:49
Aidan on Irony you can’t buy: “You’re right 100% Yes – the only route to Scottish independence within the UK’s legal system is for an act…” Mar 22, 09:36
Cynicus on Irony you can’t buy: “sam says: 22 March, 2026 at 7:46 am “Ye cannae spell. Loser” ========== How do you know that?” Mar 22, 08:43
100%Yes on Irony you can’t buy: “What surprised me was the audience actually clapping Professor Aileen Mcharg, when she was stating clearly that Scotland had no…” Mar 22, 08:40
twathater on Irony you can’t buy: “Geri, Joanna is another one who sat on her arse and said fuck all about what was going on under…” Mar 22, 03:30
twathater on Irony you can’t buy: ““Thatcher was a necessary evil, presumably you didnt live in pre-Thatcher times” There speaks a good old tory with his…” Mar 22, 03:18
Mark Beggan on Irony you can’t buy: “That comment. Or was it a rant. No one knows. I never read it but it proves that AI is…” Mar 21, 23:16
robertkknight on Irony you can’t buy: “Truth is to Sturgeon what intelligence is to Trump.” Mar 21, 22:55
William G Walker on Irony you can’t buy: “Does Nicola Sturgeon Tell “Frankly” Fibs About Three Political “Casualties”? I have now read Nicola Sturgeon’s Memoir, “Frankly”, and am…” Mar 21, 22:45
willie on Irony you can’t buy: “Bad management got bad unions. Two cheeks of the same arse. A bit like saying free enterprise good, state ownership…” Mar 21, 21:56
Mark Beggan on Irony you can’t buy: “Baby Mark says I love life. Thankyou IDF.” Mar 21, 21:22
Mark Beggan on Irony you can’t buy: “No. whoever you are. I’m on Freedom.” Mar 21, 21:19
Young Lochinvar on Irony you can’t buy: “Angus Yes that just seems to have been forgotten about in the unearthing of sneaky Pete (allegedly) getting his hand…” Mar 21, 20:56
Young Lochinvar on Irony you can’t buy: “Beggars You’ve been on Baby Trump again haven’t you? 🙂” Mar 21, 20:43
Mark Beggan on Irony you can’t buy: “The story so far….. Big beautiful Lefty meltdown. I knew they would. Everybody knows this. They tried to play poker…” Mar 21, 20:36
Young Lochinvar on Looking up at the stars: “Asian Superspreader. I will be honest, if not Canterbury, but at least Kent was originally said a bit tongue in…” Mar 21, 20:04
Angus on Irony you can’t buy: “Has the £600,000 stolen by high ranking SNP officials when Sturgeon was SNP leader been found and recovered? Have the…” Mar 21, 20:02
sarah on Irony you can’t buy: “But don’t forget, 100%Yes, that the Claim of Right DOES still exist and is legally enforceable. We just need to…” Mar 21, 19:50
Young Lochinvar on Irony you can’t buy: “Happy anniversary tomorrow of the 1421 Battle of Bauge. Called to assist their French allies reeling under English occupation and…” Mar 21, 19:47
viscount ennui on Irony you can’t buy: “Politicians from across the gender spectrum came together to defeat a law aimed to legitimise the killing of terminally-ill policies.…” Mar 21, 19:37
Aidan on Looking up at the stars: “I’m just not supporting a wartime crisis that will be close to a national lockdown to prevent the spread of…” Mar 21, 19:22
Mark Beggan on Irony you can’t buy: “Did I forget to mention the Tranny’s. Well shame on me.” Mar 21, 19:10
Mark Beggan on Irony you can’t buy: “The Iranian regime has spent 47 years perfecting the art of lies. It’s what they do. Remember Baghdad Bob? During…” Mar 21, 18:54
Mark Beggan on Irony you can’t buy: “Edinburgh today. The only people waving saltires these days are the ‘Right wing’ the Left have abandoned the Scottish flag…” Mar 21, 18:42
Young Lochinvar on Looking up at the stars: “Asian Well you are just determined to be a superspreader aren’t you? Doing something about it? – “noooo, it’s just…” Mar 21, 18:36
DWARDMAC on Irony you can’t buy: “Yes well I was there as well so let’s not ignore the hundreds and hundreds of billions of pounds siphoned…” Mar 21, 17:30
100%Yes on Irony you can’t buy: “I was looking at YouTube today and came across a video from The Independence Forum, here is the video link…” Mar 21, 17:13