The whether report
Posted on
December 13, 2014 by
Chris Cairns
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A tall tale
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Probably a robbery
Transphobia
For the good of Scottish Democracy it would be better if Neil Findlay wins. Jim Murphy is symptomatic of Labours problems, not the solution.
Murphy reads “winds over Scotland”.
Topper Chris, it’s hard to tell who is the biggest cock on that roof 🙂
Brilliant! Sums this idiot up completely.
Murphy must have had SLAB’s focus groups opining like banshees in the last few weeks. I sincerely hope a goodly number of them were taking the piss.
That’s him in a nut-shell Chris. Excellent!
BBC certainly very excited this morn over Eggs Murphy, he’s a Blairite you see. Jim’ll Fix It for you and you and you and youuuuuuuu! What a bunch.
Nice one Chris. Yeah, Murphy’s only political beliefs stem from anything that will damage his opposition. A man who is driven by the policy of expedience or convenience. Ideals, ethics, morals are for lesser beings.
On another tack, sorry, pay wall thingy, but I see Mr Ed has taken Cameron’s bait on EVEL. He apparently supports a limited English votes plan in a piece on the Herald. Anyone got the meat and bones on that? If true he’s just blinked in the face of pressure… again.
Great work Chris.The winds of change are coming and the Labour Party will be blown away.
Aye, it looks like Jim Murophy’s chickens have come home to roost.
Ha. Belter Chris, and Croompenstein.
I AM ALEX SALMOND ©Croompenstein.
The resemblance is remarkable.
Any way the wind blows..doesn’t really matter to me…to me…(apologies to all Queen fans)
Cracker of a cartoon.I have several titles for it; Thinking of expense how about ” Fiddler on the roof”
Murphy trying to play the part of TOPOL I.E. THE OLD PARTY OF LABOUR
I really want the egg man to win, we can all watch as Slab dig the hope deeper.
Expenses Fiddler on the Roof! 😆
I’m here all week, folks!
Good yin, Chris.
🙂
And i’m sure if you truly believed NF was going to win you’d already have something drawn and put on stand-by.
😉
____________
@ Bob Mack.
“Fiddler on the roof”
Belter – so apt.
🙂
____________
On a more serious note.
This article from late on last night already hinting at cries of “possible disaffiliation” coming from certain unions.
link to archive.today
Jim waiting on wind to help him blow smoke up your ass
Whose the vainer of the two?
[…] The whether report […]
@macart at 9:34
I don’t know if I’ve done this right, but looks OK.
link to archive.today
Another excellent cartoon.
Macart says:
13 December, 2014 at 9:34 am
It could be that Ed is accepting that he will not have many Scottish MP’s therefore he is hoping to hold his English defects to UKIP by this gesture. ( empty gesture )
It demonstrates that the union comes first ( meaning England)
He’s going to say anything and everything to save Labour in Scotland. He said last Labour government had scrapped teamGB nukes on an STV pre referendum audience Q&A debate. 5+ months of SNP bad, vote Murphy or else, belching out of Pacific Quay like a toxic waste dump over Scotland.
Murphy is certainly no Santa Claus and he wont be coming down anyones chimney anytime soon. Well not after the way him and the britnats conned, lied to and stole independence from the Scottish people.
I hope his Christmas cheers turn to tears at next mays GE. Payback.
That toon captures Murphy’s character, or lack of it, spot on.
Roland Smith says:
“For the good of Scottish Democracy it would be better if Neil Findlay wins. Jim Murphy is symptomatic of Labours problems, not the solution.”
While I agree with your personality analysis, I think Scotland will benefit more with Murphy because we will maintain SLab on its current course straight towards the iceberg and oblivion. Scotland needs completely new, left of centre untarnished parties … Not a reworking of SLab.
@ CYNICAL HIGHLANDER,
Absolute belter.
Of course he is such a greedy bastard he could be just trying to steal the lead
would take him more than a minute, would need to consult his diary first, to remind him what his political conviction was.
Yesterday, the day before that, the day befo………………………………………………………………………………………………………!
Nice one, Chris, you can see from the excellent quips, works on many levels. I like the two cocks comment!
Cocks are better together
The cock on the compass replies “you’ve been talking oot yer arse for years. Any mair shit & you’ll make a mess of they ridge tiles. Gonny beat it?”
‘When this old world starts getting me down….
..In the lords is magic as can be, and there no rules or laws apply to mee….’
Dugdale wins deputy leader. Good times ahead in Holyrood for Nicola!!
[…] The whether report […]
Just in.
It’s the wet puppy for FM’s questions.
Carly Simon: Jim’s entrance music.
link to youtube.com
A cock and a fanny on the one roof.
Murphy is the cock on the right.
Hee, hee, BritLab now have their own 45ers
Murphy is an arsehole, bring it on.
Cheers WJ, but still getting their pay wall thing.
This excerpt though:
Labour have backed proposals that would bar Scots MPs from some Westminster committees – in a bid to head off David Cameron’s “English votes for English laws” push.
Under Labour’s proposal a committee of English MPs would scrutinise and amend but not veto ‘English only’ legislation. All MPs, incuding Scots, would still vote on the legislation when it returned to the Commons.
@ Clootie
Yeah, that’s what I read from it. He’s playing to the balconies again and dancing to the Tory/UKIP tune at that. He believes he needs the votes from the marginals far more than he needs his Scottish MPs. In truth he needs both, but can’t please both, ‘caught between a Scot and a hard place as it were’. 🙂
His option? To break his referendum promises, thereby impressing the middle England vote, but lose Scotland forever. Toughie for him, but strangely I’m finding sympathy hard to find for ‘one nation Labour’ these days.
when Murph gets the shoe in , expect the best Labour manifesto ever. It will be lies and bigger better lies to con labours old support, will claim they have nothing to do with W.Minster , in fact the lying has already started
I see he’s consulting labour’s deity.
With apologies to Carly Symon:
# You’re so VANE, you probably think this vote is about you
You’re so VANE, I’ll bet you think this vote is about you
Don’t you? Don’t You? #
Now there is a surprise.
Noticed he was the only candidate interviewed on BBC Radio 4 10pm news last night.
Congratulations Labour London, Westminster is on its way to regaining full control of the Scottish Parliament, the big man from HQ has arrived to sort you all out.
The Imperial Masters are sending a Blairite to the Branch Office.
What are Jim’s views on torture?
Jim and “roof” side by side….siunds about right to me
Murphy says in his acceptance speech that he will “work with anyone who shares his values.”
You will need to go into a coalition with the Tories Jim to fulfil that dream.
‘The Murphy Salute’, carried over from previous thread –
link to youtube.com
So, its Murphy. Whilst I wanted him to lose just for annoyance value, his victory is an extra couple of percentage points for the SNP. I can see some union members resigning.
It would be a shame if he was beaten in the GE. Superhuman effort required by all independence parties to make it so!
All we need now is an update on SNP membership and it will be a Happy Jolly Christmas.
thats the smurf the new leader along with the dugs arse as his deputy dog
Murphys Winning Law – what Labour can fuck up..they will fuck up
link to bbc.co.uk
PictAtRandom says:
“Hee, hee, BritLab now have their own 45ers”
AYE, come next May they’ll all be P45ers.
🙂
Murphy’s win was inevitable. Good news and bad news.
Labour needed someone who can string a sentence together, but it comes at a price. A true red Tory, who isn’t fooling anyone when he tries to reinvent himself.
Hoist the Irn Bru crates the leader has been choosen Scotland 1st (repeat 3 times) pity he didnt put Scotland 1st on the 18th Sept,wee note to Jim on the subject of coronations Gordon Brown the unelected prime minister.
Who,s necks on the line to let Slim Jim stand for the Scottish parliament in a by election.
Great cartoon Chris Murph at the Apex of his career,the cock that did,nt doodle doodle do,an am no talking chicken.
MSM deliver same result
55%
45%
Labour 45
Magnificent Murphy strikes the first blow for Labour by telling the nationwide audience that he wishes he had led the team in green in the East of Glasgow. .Every Rangers supporter listening will be desperate to now vote for him. Well he can forget my neighbour for a start, who has just labelled him a “Tim” bastard.
Checked the LabourHame website and they were blogging live updates. The last one read:
admin
Running out of battery here so the live blog is probably done for today. Congratulations Jim and Kezia. A fresh start for tomorrow’s Scotland.
They canna get the batteries to work!!! Sums them up really…
Cock replies:
Who cares what your deeply held political conviction is-I may be a Cock but you’ll always be a Prick!
Frakkin ‘ell
link to tinyurl.com
@ Square haggis
Thanks for that frackin link. I needed a laff.
It lives! It lives! The cadaver is given a second life.
‘Jim Murphy MP’ – Grouse Beater – WordPress
His speech was the usual stuttering half-truths, lies, and empty rhetoric. For a man of little confidence he has a lot of chutzpah. The media still refuses to acknowledge a Labour group in Scotland, not a separate party.
Thanks for the cartoon Chris, numerous interpretations.
Even though it’ll probabl ymake it harder for Lab to win with Murphy in charge, my heart sank a bit at the news.
He’s such a devious, sneeky liar and we know that the BBC will big him up.
So yet another, hopefully only 6 months, of bitter dispute.
Also on the Labour hame blog updates:
link to archive.today
“Members of Neil’s campaign team taking a final opportunity to brief the press. Rather unnecessarily negative. The vote is over and whoever wins needs to get everyone’s support.”
Yet Big Jim says they are all united. I really don’t think they will be. Neil Findlay couldn’t look Murphy in the eye when they shook hands after the result. Their internal squabbles will continue as Murphy tries to pull them even further to the right. Some Unions will have a real moral dilemma and I look forward to hearing Len McCluskey’s revised thoughts. SNP trade union group need to be quick off the mark to capitalise further.
Dugdale will crack under the pressure of Nicola’s debating skills and will resign within a year.
Labour, tick tock.
Remember all orangemenn are so thick they’ll still vote for Murphy. After all they did what the Pope told them to do when he came out for the union pre 18th September.
So eggs murphy is the man destined to lead labour into oblivion in Scotland. Man on state tv said he has”street presence”, whatever that is. Maybe its like what a bin has or an irn bru crate.
@Bob Mack
Yep. What was Murphy thinking? As if they haven’t got enough troubles without alienating the blue half of Glasgow.
Not only that, it sounded like he’d have much rather lead the green team than the red team. He could have just made a whole load of labour folk think ‘what the hell?’.
If that is going to be the quality of his speeches there will be lots of fun to be had in the months to come.
Once again Labour copy SNP by now putting a “fitbaw loving man” in charge and a female lawyer as his deputy.
Sadly theyre only about 8 years behind the times.
In their Going For Gold quest..theyre forever playing catch-up
It’s an allegory of ‘Poor Little Half-Chick’ right?
With the added twist that Murphy, bouyed with his success with Chicken Licken, where he managed to persuade him the Sky would fall on his head, is now determined to persuade Little Half-Chick that lightning will not strike him in his new position.
Always though there was a missing link between those two fables.
Yawn! So it’s Jim Murphy, Whit a surprise, Yawn!
Whaap!!
Boney-M installed, and yet another coffin-nail hammered home. The remarkable thing is that they’re doing it from the inside.
No no no…Yes
Kezia and Ruth will no doubt try and make for quite the dynamic tag-team
You can picture Nicola smiling away already
@ SquareHaggis.
Thanks, best laugh i’ve had in a while, sore jaws and watery eyes.
🙂
I wonder if Jim will go on a Scottish tour like the First Ministers, after all he found the time for his last trip during the referendum, It would be interesting to compere turnouts if he did!
@Capella,
Chickens and aw that, hen 😉
Frackin aplenty here also
link to tinyurl.com
Caption: UKOK’s
Right then! Creepy Jim it is. *gets popcorn*
Is it not ironic that Westminster’s man gets the post only made available after the previous numpty quit and cited Westminster interference as her reason? Oh I forgot. Labour voters are too thick to see it.
Comments open, for once…
link to bbc.co.uk
Murphy & Dugdale – Labour’s Scottish Branch Office Dream Team? More like their Nightmare Pair!
I can’t vouch for the veracity of this quote but it’s in the comments on the BBC article I linked to earlier…
“Jim Murphy got 55.77% of the votes.
So 1673 people voted for him”.
Reminder of a wee swatch at Caltonjock’s article
link to caltonjock.com
The 55% vote attributed to Murphy was, I believe, from one section of the Labour juggernaut. It was as low as 13% in another. I’m sure Wings will publish the full breakdown.
10-1 Murphy is not in the same job 2016.
Has James ‘this man Murphy is too modest to allow himself to be called a hero’ Cook delivered his impartial view of the Second Coming on BBC Murphy yet?
Oh wait, he just has. Boak.
Like was said earlier he won 55.77% of the vote, almost the same as the no vote in the referendum, 55.30%. Surprise, surprise. Things can only get better. So who will be the spokesperson for labour in the Scottish Parliament? Jabba the Hut maybe?
Stephen.
Xmas comes early.
The Smurph leader , hahahaha Oh how good is this. Labour supporters everywhere now have a problem voting for someone they hate. 🙂
R.I.P labour
Chris , check the comments , your toon has Wings on comedy overload.
Now we prepare for the usual BBC propaganda telling us of the return of the savior. The ” New , New, New labour ” the answer to WM problems with those Nasty Nat Scots .
Does it get any better. 🙂
How long before someone names him “The Cock o the North”
OH?
Congratulations to “The Undertaker” R. I. P. Labour in Scotland.
Mighty Murphin’ Mutant Ninja Turtle?
Another Lurch to the right?
Here’s hoping Murhy’s Law will prevail for Labour. ‘All that can go wrong, will go wrong’.
The myth master of 100 towns in a hundred days rides again supported by the creators of that myth, and others ,like the vow .The media. We can see he actually spoke to less than 500 people on that farce of a tour if we examine all the clips. He will however, be reincarnated by the media to be fit for public consumption, as was obvious this morning. A man of the street. Better hope you don’t meet me on the street Jim Boy. I’m Glasgow through and through and will not for an instant hesitate to tell you exactly what you really are, whether you are happy about it or not, you slug of a man. In other times we called someone like you a “turncoat”.
Either my KB or me needs new batteries, keep dropping letters.
Does anyone know why there are people missing from this list? Gordon Brown, Anas Sarwar…
Sarah Boyack MSP was nominated for Scottish Labour leader by……
Claudia Beamish MSP
Sarah Boyack MSP
Malcolm Chisholm MSP
Shelia Gilmore MP
Rhoda Grant MSP
Mark Lazarowicz MP
Lewis Macdonald MSP
Margaret McDougall MSP
Sandra Osborne MP
David Stewart MSP
line
Neil Findlay MSP was nominated for Scottish Labour leader by…….
Jayne Baxter MSP
Katy Clark MP
Michael Connarty MP
Ian Davidson MP
Neil Findlay MSP
Cara Hilton MSP
Graeme Morrice MP
Elaine Murray MSP
Alex Rowley MSP
Jim Sheridan MP
Elaine Smith MSP
line
Jim Murphy MP was nominated for Scottish Labour leader by….
Douglas Alexander MP
Jackie Baillie MSP
William Bain MP
Claire Baker MSP
Richard Baker MSP
Gordon Banks MP
Anne Begg MP
Neil Bibby MSP
Russell Brown MP
Alistair Darling MP
Brian Donohoe MP
Gemma Doyle MP
Mark Griffin MSP
Tom Harris MP
James Kelly MSP
Hanzala Malik MSP
David Martin MEP
Jenny Marra MSP
Jim McGovern MP
Anne McGuire MP
Fiona O’Donnell MP
John Pentland MSP
Margaret McCulloch MSP
Ken Macintosh MSP
Pamela Nash MP
Graeme Pearson MSP
Frank Roy MP
Richard Simpson MSP
Catherine Stihler MEP
I am not well up on whether the majority of M.Ps who voted for Murphy were predominantly Westminster or not. Any clues? Could signify Westmonster Labour preferring one of their own at helm, rather than trust SLAB
@ Pauls Rose
You’re the Yin to my Yang Paula.
To be honest, I wasn’t sure how much longer I could continue to care about anything really. Your stroking has helped me see things more clearly and diminish the conflict in my hart. 😉
Any chance of popping over? I’m still not sure which direction to take from here. I need a bit more stroking. xx
Lonnie & The Carollons – You say
link to youtube.com
Weathervanes going up in Scotland, TV aerials coming down.
Let’s keep the wind behind us always, and the propaganda out from our ears.
@ R type grunt, Just saw your post which answers my question, Seems Westmonster M.P.s preferred one of their own to hold the reins. Speaks volumes for faith in members of S.L.A.B. does it not?
Now can Millband do the following:
1. Congratulate Murphy sincerely.
2. Explain to the rest of us why he is the best man for the job, given his Blairite credentials.
3. Tell us how Labour intend to square the differences, ‘the political and economic drift’, between England and Scotland.
4. Convince his own backbenchers that Labour Scotland is in good hands.
5. Ratify Murphy’s recently found support for devolution of all incomes tax.
Now that Murphy is ‘in’ … He should be steadfastly ignored by YES groups. Nothing he says or can say, is worth discussing or arguing over. We all know that it is rhetoric and nothing that needs to be delivered in reality. That’s the way of Labour. That’s the way of Murphy.
Murphy – Concious incompetent.
Dugbreath – Unconcious incompetent.
For comparison…
Sturgeon and Salmond – Unconcious competents.
Mike Russell – Concious competent.
Liz
He’s such a devious, sneeky liar and we know that the BBC will big him up.
He’s a Fabian, so you couldn’t really expect anything else. Does that sound paranoid? 🙂
Cameron
‘He’s a Fabian, so you couldn’t really expect anything else. Does that sound paranoid?”
No sounds like an anagram.
He fibs an a a’
Chic
I’m a wee bit dyslexic, so I’ve never really been that good with anagrams. I try to avoid cross word, as well. 😉
Welcome to New Scottish Labour.
Just think – every thursday at Noon FiFi will be pressing her well-used Verbal Diaorrhea Button for our delectation.
Its another Jim lie. It never takes a minute to say “Whats in it for me?”
Cut & Paste for Mr Milliband. Feel feel to amend, personalise or improve. Add you email address and send.
Ed Miliband Campaign Office,
Room 502,
10 Greycoat Place, London
SW1P 1SB
Edmiliband.org
020 7960 6585
Dear Mr Milliband,
Having watched a number of your speeches and presentations where you invariably assure us of your honesty, integrity, commitment, transparency and many other wonderful values, I am confident that you can answer a few questions that allow me to assess the strength and attractiveness of the Labour Party branch in Scotland.
My wife and I are currently deciding whether to join up and we will be voting for Labour in May.
But we are stuck with the following questions that are very pertinent to our decision.
1. How do you expect Murphy to redress the ever widening ‘economic, cultural and political gulf’ between Scotland and England.
2. Do you believe that Murphy will successfully convince enough of the Scottish electorate that the Labour Branch (and Murohy) had an epiphany and a subsequent U-turn on previous held beliefs.
3. How strong is the Labour Party in Scotland? My wife and I understand that it’s membership is shrinking and is now under 5000 real members. Perhaps you could enlighten us.
4. When 70% of the people in Scotland (YES and NOs) are against Trident renewal, to what extent do you agree that this presents a special democratic problem since the majority of the residents in the country of Scotland do not want to spend more money on Trident when there are so many other priorities.
5. Finally, do you appreciate that in the even of an EU referendum where Scotland votes to stay in and England votes out, Scotland should be allowed this as a democratic right. And may well be an argument through the Courts of Human Justice. We have been EU citizens for forty years.
Now this is your test. Can you answer all of these questions, openly, honestly and accurately without reverting to politic-speak and meandering round each one. For once, demonstrate that you are smart enough not to prevaricate. Residents of Scotland are terribly tired of the succession of lies that come out of London and Westminster.
We look forward to hearing from you.
Best regards