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The End… OR IS IT? 131

Posted on December 18, 2013 by

Spain’s supposed threat to veto Scottish membership of the EU is like one of those serial killers on a student campus in a slash ‘n gore movie. No matter how many times the evil maniac is stabbed, hit over the head with bricks, shot 46 times through the lungs with a depleted-uranium blunderbuss, drowned in boiling acid or baked in a kiln with the pottery-class homework, he’s still stalking the heroine in the final scene.

handgrave

Today the vampiric figure of a Spanish EU veto threat received yet another silver, garlic-coated stake through the heart. But we expect it to get up and walk again every other week until September 2014 regardless.

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What Mariano Rajoy didn’t say 234

Posted on November 28, 2013 by

In “breaking news” during a dull ding-dong of a debate on Wednesday’s Newsnight Scotland, we were breathlessly told that Spanish Prime Minister Mariano Rajoy had made an important intervention in the debate about whether Scotland should keep paying for railway lines between London and Birmingham, weapons of mass destruction and Ian Davidson’s expenses. (We paraphrase.)

rajoy

Stopping just short of a drum-roll or mariachi band (yes, those are Mexican, but are you telling us BBC Scotland would know the difference?), viewers were dramatically informed that in a major new development Mariano Rajoy had said… exactly what he’s been saying for most of the last two years. 

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The Great Gingerbread Robbery 216

Posted on November 02, 2013 by

When you’re a full time carer, managing to get out for an hour or so to the local branch of Morrisons to get the weekly shopping counts as ‘quality me time’. It allows me to stock up on favourite munchies and comfort food. I like a wee slice of Kirriemuir gingerbread, slathered with butter. The other half enjoys a thick slab of it in a bowl, covered in Devon custard with a dollop of double cream. Bugger the cholesterol.

But the other day there was none in the usual aisle, just a pile of Christmas cakes.

gingerbread

I asked a guy stocking shelves where they’d moved it to. He apologised, and told me there wasn’t any in stock. All the ordering is done by Head Office down in England he said, and they’d sent instructions that no more would be ordered until the New Year in order to make space for piles of Christmas cake. In October.

Who eats Christmas cake in October anyway?

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    • Hatey McHateface on The Jokers: “It’s really wicked to hope somebody takes her down into the tunnels to sample at first hand, for a year…Jun 8, 10:27
    • TURABDIN on The Jokers: “OF COURSE to many in native Scottish politics this is by far more important. https://archive.is/fWe1Y The owl and the pussy…Jun 8, 10:11
    • Hatey McHateface on The Jokers: “OK, Xaracen, I stand corrected. You and Mia both. I constantly challenge you to give us some examples of how…Jun 8, 10:04
    • Hatey McHateface on The Jokers: “Thanks for your reply, Alf. I’m very happy with the idea of re-instating the Scottish Crown. That’s exactly the kind…Jun 8, 09:55
    • Xaracen on The Jokers: ““you would have noticed that Mia writes off every democratic vote in Scotland as illegal or invalid when it does…Jun 8, 09:40
    • Alf Baird on The Jokers: ““People don’t like being made a fool of.” Yes, quite, and in this regard we are still awaiting the response…Jun 8, 09:28
    • Hatey McHateface on The Jokers: “You may have a point, Alf. Never mind the 5.5 million Scots who have been hoodwinked by the hoax. There’s…Jun 8, 08:47
    • robertkknight on The Jokers: ““Would Scots crowdfund such a judicial review of the ToU?” This one would!Jun 7, 22:53
    • Alf Baird on The Jokers: “The petrifaction of Scotland’s elected national representatives and their ‘lack of courage at the decisive moment’ (as predicted by Fanon)…Jun 7, 21:49
    • Hatey McHateface on The Jokers: “How do you account for Ferguson? Has he been colonised?Jun 7, 20:19
    • Insider on The Jokers: “Hallelujah!Jun 7, 20:05
    • Xaracen on The Jokers: “Its not the Act of Union, whichever one you had in mind that’s invalid; it’s the Treaty of Union that…Jun 7, 19:26
    • Chris Downie on Ball Of Confusion: “I don’t know of any interview where he said that specifically, but I have no reason to believe it’s not…Jun 7, 17:59
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    • Anthem on The Jokers: “And exactly how do you achieve that without interference from Westminster? That’s right, you can’t! We even have English parties…Jun 7, 17:45
    • Hatey McHateface on The Jokers: ““analytical thought such as Mia exhibits” Mia’s “analytical thought” has led her to praise poot on here. And blame the…Jun 7, 17:18
    • Hatey McHateface on The Jokers: “Isn’t it odd how quickly people jump on the bandwagon of believing Scottish politicos have sold out to cash in…Jun 7, 17:00
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    • Hatey McHateface on The Jokers: “Wheesht, TURABDIN! Wingers mostly don’t like facts that contradict their preformed prejudices. Like the fact of which indigenous group first…Jun 7, 16:01
    • Hatey McHateface on The Jokers: “Is that you,Alf? 🙂Jun 7, 15:50
    • Hatey McHateface on The Jokers: ““Kingdom of Scotland” Hear, hear. I’m all for it. But first we have to get rid of those damn republicans…Jun 7, 15:47
    • Mia on The Jokers: ““For Scottish MPs to attempt to break the Union against the expressed wishes of the Sovereign Scottish people would be…Jun 7, 13:49
    • Jay on The Jokers: “Tony, Little do you know: if you do not put X in a box according to particular rules then it…Jun 7, 13:38
    • Mia on The Jokers: ““Can be arsed to go out and vote”? Why should they even waste their time in going to the polling…Jun 7, 13:36
    • factchecker on The Jokers: “Mia says ‘On the other hand, if the people of Scotland were not required to vote for the ratification of…Jun 7, 13:13
    • Jay on The Jokers: “Steven. Your last 2 lines are false. You either do not read enough or are a liar or delusional. Your…Jun 7, 13:08
    • Northcode on The Jokers: “I’ve copied some text from Alf Baird’s THREE PHASES OF DECOLONIZATION paper which I think is relevant to a comment…Jun 7, 12:46
    • Mia on The Jokers: “” Is there a more bitter, collection of fantasists anywhere in Scotland than those who post drivel on ‘Wings’ everyday,…Jun 7, 12:39
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