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Wings Over Scotland


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Standing on one leg 8

Posted on December 13, 2012 by

The office is the coldest room in my house. Facing north it doesn't get a lot of sunlight, and the radiator is directly underneath the window, so much of what heat it generates disappears outside immediately. So I have a little halogen heater to keep the place cosy in winter, which also gives off a bright and pleasant firesidey glow and saves you having to turn the light on then wait 45 minutes for the useless "energy-saving" piece of shit to actually reach some sort of vaguely worthwhile level of illumination.

(Never mind about the Iraq war – I'd put Tony fucking Blair in prison for the rest of his life just for robbing us of proper lightbulbs, the wanker.)

The heater has three replaceable halogen elements. This is the process for replacing one of them (click to see the whole thing):

I have two questions for the manufacturers.

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The Olympic enclosures 1

Posted on July 25, 2012 by

As the sun made its first appearance of the summer at the weekend, Wings over Sealand wasn’t slow off the mark. On the “B” of the “BANG!”, we leapt onto a train for a scenic two-hour journey to the seaside, specifically the lovely south-coast town of Weymouth. It’s a remarkable place, changing character every time you turn a corner.

The front is a traditional resort promenade, with beaches and ice-cream stands and arcades. Just behind it is a picturesque working harbour town, tatty fishing boats mingling with some extremely fancy millionaires’ yachts. (Don’t miss the tasty and gigantic battered faggots at Bennett’s On The Waterfront fish and chip shop, by the way, the closest thing you’ll find to haggis in an English chippy and heavenly with a splash of onion vinegar.) Adjacent to both is a scruffy but bustling town centre, almost entirely free of the empty shops littering every other urban conurbation in Britain.

And if you embark on about five minutes’ leisurely stroll from the western end of the prom or the busy, noisy harbour and marina, you’ll find the town’s only sizeable area of public green space, in the form of the beautiful and peaceful oasis that is The Nothe.

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Flame wars 7

Posted on May 20, 2012 by

As huge crowds of primitive villagers turn out to marvel at some fire this weekend, here's some old-fashioned journalism to ponder. Click the image to read the article.

Enjoy the torch (possibly the last spectacle invented by Adolf Hitler to still be regularly performed and celebrated), and the two weeks of the Games while they last. Try not to get sick, in either sense of the term. Try not to be alarmed if anyone sticks a missile battery on your roof (and slaps an eviction order on you for making a fuss about it or for just not being lucrative enough), or a sonic cannon, or by the bored police with machine guns hanging around your train station waiting to shoot anyone who tries to protest or take an unlicenced beverage or snack into one of the state-of-the-art stadia.

Enjoy all the top events (on telly, unless you're a corporate sponsor), and as Boris Johnson gallivants around turning them into a giant Tory showpiece, take a moment out to give thanks to Tony Blair and the rest of Labour for making it all possible (with our money, of course) for him. Who needs hospitals and schools anyway?

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    • Dunx on Just Good Friends: “The SNP might also like to consider whether sixteen year old children are mature enough to vote in any future…Jul 11, 22:01
    • Alf Baird on Just Good Friends: “” I think that any kind of extreme dehumanizing and/or hatred of any group of people is a form of…Jul 11, 20:31
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    • Lorn on Just Good Friends: “I absolutely agree on the alignment. Both groups utilize the exact-same tactics and their aims are very similar. The official…Jul 11, 18:31
    • Hatey McHateface on Just Good Friends: ““continually displayed abhorrent behaviour and used derogatory language to describe other fellow humans” Check out the synthetic outrage from Dan.…Jul 11, 18:15
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    • Alf Baird on Just Good Friends: “Manipulation, divide and rule, paternalistic colonialists, and finally partition when all else fails – all are part of the colonizer’s…Jul 11, 18:12
    • Hatey McHateface on Just Good Friends: “That’s blethers, TH, even for you. If we have a People’s Assembly to sack politicians who don’t do as the…Jul 11, 17:56
    • Dan on Just Good Friends: “@Lorn says : “I think that any kind of extreme dehumanizing and/or hatred of any group of people is a…Jul 11, 17:50
    • twathater on Just Good Friends: “And THAT is where a REAL people’s assembly would EXPOSE and destroy the REAL purpose of these deviants and perverts…Jul 11, 17:39
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    • Hatey McHateface on Just Good Friends: ““partly to make the Scottish government look good (just being different even if that amounted to nothing at all)” Damned…Jul 11, 17:35
    • twathater on Just Good Friends: “I very seldom agree with anything you post Mark unionist Beggan but that comment is right on the moneyJul 11, 17:27
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    • Lorn on Just Good Friends: “Hatey: you are absolutely correct. It was never about the women and girls. Always about the men in frocks. Personally,…Jul 11, 17:03
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    • Alf Baird on Just Good Friends: “The reality of a colonial society such as in the Scottish context provides for a more complex picture in regard…Jul 11, 14:46
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    • James on Too Tight To Mention: “Amen to that, brother.Jul 11, 11:56
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