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Wings Over Scotland


Archive for the ‘what a scorcher’


Standing on one leg 8

Posted on December 13, 2012 by

The office is the coldest room in my house. Facing north it doesn't get a lot of sunlight, and the radiator is directly underneath the window, so much of what heat it generates disappears outside immediately. So I have a little halogen heater to keep the place cosy in winter, which also gives off a bright and pleasant firesidey glow and saves you having to turn the light on then wait 45 minutes for the useless "energy-saving" piece of shit to actually reach some sort of vaguely worthwhile level of illumination.

(Never mind about the Iraq war – I'd put Tony fucking Blair in prison for the rest of his life just for robbing us of proper lightbulbs, the wanker.)

The heater has three replaceable halogen elements. This is the process for replacing one of them (click to see the whole thing):

I have two questions for the manufacturers.

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The Olympic enclosures 1

Posted on July 25, 2012 by

As the sun made its first appearance of the summer at the weekend, Wings over Sealand wasn’t slow off the mark. On the “B” of the “BANG!”, we leapt onto a train for a scenic two-hour journey to the seaside, specifically the lovely south-coast town of Weymouth. It’s a remarkable place, changing character every time you turn a corner.

The front is a traditional resort promenade, with beaches and ice-cream stands and arcades. Just behind it is a picturesque working harbour town, tatty fishing boats mingling with some extremely fancy millionaires’ yachts. (Don’t miss the tasty and gigantic battered faggots at Bennett’s On The Waterfront fish and chip shop, by the way, the closest thing you’ll find to haggis in an English chippy and heavenly with a splash of onion vinegar.) Adjacent to both is a scruffy but bustling town centre, almost entirely free of the empty shops littering every other urban conurbation in Britain.

And if you embark on about five minutes’ leisurely stroll from the western end of the prom or the busy, noisy harbour and marina, you’ll find the town’s only sizeable area of public green space, in the form of the beautiful and peaceful oasis that is The Nothe.

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Flame wars 7

Posted on May 20, 2012 by

As huge crowds of primitive villagers turn out to marvel at some fire this weekend, here's some old-fashioned journalism to ponder. Click the image to read the article.

Enjoy the torch (possibly the last spectacle invented by Adolf Hitler to still be regularly performed and celebrated), and the two weeks of the Games while they last. Try not to get sick, in either sense of the term. Try not to be alarmed if anyone sticks a missile battery on your roof (and slaps an eviction order on you for making a fuss about it or for just not being lucrative enough), or a sonic cannon, or by the bored police with machine guns hanging around your train station waiting to shoot anyone who tries to protest or take an unlicenced beverage or snack into one of the state-of-the-art stadia.

Enjoy all the top events (on telly, unless you're a corporate sponsor), and as Boris Johnson gallivants around turning them into a giant Tory showpiece, take a moment out to give thanks to Tony Blair and the rest of Labour for making it all possible (with our money, of course) for him. Who needs hospitals and schools anyway?

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    • TURABDIN on The Party Of The Dead: “security, war & collateral damage futures, a stock that never fails…certainly worked in Iraq. But first you must destroy &…Aug 12, 08:53
    • gm on The Party Of The Dead: “Well spotted Turabdin. The Ruling Class.Aug 11, 22:05
    • James on The Party Of The Dead: ““….Who is the pathetic twat?” Still you, Bubba.Aug 11, 21:10
    • Hatey McHateface on The Party Of The Dead: “Generally speaking, TURABDIN, in our culture, we don’t expect the offspring of anybody to be held accountable for the sins…Aug 11, 21:06
    • Hatey McHateface on The Party Of The Dead: “Isn’t that how to deal with a fatberg? Divide it into smaller lumps that can then be individually flushed.Aug 11, 20:56
    • Aidan on The Party Of The Dead: “What useful activities do you spend your day doing that you can be “diverted” and “distracted” from?Aug 11, 20:40
    • Young Lochinvar on The Party Of The Dead: “OL Probably to hide the fact he hadn’t fully thawed out, plus all the resuscitation equipment he requires when brought…Aug 11, 19:39
    • Young Lochinvar on The Party Of The Dead: “HMcH I suspect it was the Diet Coke supplies that got hardest hit. He’s a fan apparently.Aug 11, 19:36
    • Young Lochinvar on The Party Of The Dead: “Well hold on there Bald Eagle! True. I uncharacteristically missed that one 🙂Aug 11, 19:31
    • James on The Party Of The Dead: “Well said, diabloandco. Those 4 Yoon trolls are endless. Here all day, every day to divert, distract and divide. As…Aug 11, 19:29
    • Aidan on The Party Of The Dead: “Have you thought about moving to South West Scotland? It’d be nice to get some more English voices into the…Aug 11, 19:21
    • James on The Party Of The Dead: “What a fucking clown you are, Adrian. You keep good company. Cue the SP.Aug 11, 19:20
    • TURABDIN on The Party Of The Dead: “FILTHY LUCRE… https://archive.is/AkQ3T the spawn of a major war criminal keeping it in the family.Aug 11, 18:42
    • Captain Caveman on The Party Of The Dead: “Sure! Keep the cash rolling in. £20 on the meter so far. 🙂 Never done a good grift before, sounds…Aug 11, 17:53
    • Minceheid on The Party Of The Dead: “Captain Caveman says: 11 August, 2026 at 4:39 pm No, no Aidan, I’m actually quite touched that Fatso would give…Aug 11, 17:34
    • Captain Caveman on The Party Of The Dead: “*margarita even 😀 Jeez, what a typo… don’t want Fatso to think I’m holding a French white daisy for him…Aug 11, 17:21
    • Oneliner on The Party Of The Dead: “Gordon Brown had a black-windowed cavalcade of Range Rovers when he went to his ‘How To Save The Union’ meeting…Aug 11, 17:17
    • Captain Caveman on The Party Of The Dead: “I’ll be sure to do so too, just for him – marguerite in hand. 😀Aug 11, 17:16
    • Aidan on The Party Of The Dead: “He probably hasn’t twigged that you’ll still be able to post on the internet, exactly as today, from another location…Aug 11, 16:58
    • Stevie on Anatomy Of A Grift: “Mentally ill, delusional, perpetually-victimhood-angry, self-righteous = dangerousAug 11, 16:43
    • Captain Caveman on The Party Of The Dead: “No, no Aidan, I’m actually quite touched that Fatso would give me his life savings to help move out. :)…Aug 11, 16:39
    • Aidan on The Party Of The Dead: “lol as if you have £20 JamesAug 11, 15:45
    • James on The Party Of The Dead: “Means ‘not you’.Aug 11, 15:20
    • James on The Party Of The Dead: “£20 towards your moving expenses, no problem. Just say the word. Good riddance.Aug 11, 15:18
    • Aidan on The Party Of The Dead: “Some of this “analysis” borders on being absurd and is clearly written from the standpoint of another agenda. – Nobody…Aug 11, 15:04
    • Hatey McHateface on The Party Of The Dead: “Somebody would have had to count the pies and sandwiches, etc, before and after. If it’s the same employee that…Aug 11, 14:29
    • Hatey McHateface on The Party Of The Dead: “I guess the imperial nationalist Scots aren’t “True Scots”, what with being brainwashed and all. If they might be concerned…Aug 11, 14:20
    • Captain Caveman on The Party Of The Dead: “I daresay even an airport catering truck is preferable to, say, a luxury campervan paid for with embezzled funds. 🙂Aug 11, 14:14
    • Young Lochinvar on The Party Of The Dead: “Batman had the Batmobile, the Pope has the Pope Mobile, JFK an open top saloon, the King a carriage and…Aug 11, 13:50
    • Alf Baird on The Party Of The Dead: ““definition of “Scot”” An interesting point, Hatey. We may say there are different forms of nationalist ideology at play, and…Aug 11, 13:49
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