The world's most-read Scottish politics website

Wings Over Scotland


And I would ask 500 more

Posted on May 06, 2013 by

It’s indescribably beautiful that the No camp’s much-trailed “500 questions” PDF about independence actually features 507. At least they’re getting their arithmetic wrong downwards for a change. When all those are answered they promise hundreds and hundreds more, so we thought we’d give them a head start on Volume 2.

manyquestions-prog278

508. What’s that coming over the hill in an independent Scotland? Is it a monster?

509. War! HURGH! What will it be good for in an independent Scotland?

510. Who’ll put the bomp in the bomp-a-bomp-a-bomp in an independent Scotland?

511. Who’ll put the ram in the ramalamadingdong in an independent Scotland?

512. How much is that doggy in the window in an independent Scotland? (Not the one with the waggly tail, the other one. We won’t be able to afford ones with waggly tails, and nobody knows what currency we’d be paying with.)

513. What time is love in an independent Scotland?

514. Why do birds suddenly appear, every time you are near in an independent Scotland?

515. When, will I, will I be famous in an independent Scotland?

516. How much wood could a woodchuck chuck, IF a woodchuck could chuck wood in an independent Scotland?

517. Why does it always rain on me in an independent Scotland?

518. Is this the way they say the future’s meant to feel, or just 20,000 people standing in a field in an independent Scotland?

519. If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me in an independent Scotland?

520. Who let the dogs out in an independent Scotland? Who? Who?

521. What’s inside a girl in an independent Scotland?

522. If a picture paints a thousand words, why can’t I paint you in an independent Scotland?

523. What’s the frequency in an independent Scotland, Kenneth? (Presumably “of death threats from evil cybernats to your lovely daughter”.)

524. I would do anything for love in an independent Scotland, but I won’t do what?

525. Kelly, can you handle this? Michelle, can you handle this? Beyonce, can you handle this? I don’t think they can handle this in an independent Scotland.

526. What if God was one of us in an independent Scotland?

527. What would you do if you saw spaceships over Glasgow in an independent Scotland?

528. Is she really going out with him in an independent Scotland?

529. What difference does it make in an independent Scotland?

530. Did you fall off a building and land on your head, or did a truck in an independent Scotland run over your face instead?

531. WHAT’S she gonna look like with a chimney on her in an independent Scotland?

532. What’s so funny ’bout peace, love and understanding in an independent Scotland?

533. Do you take me for such a fool to think I’d make contact with the one who tries to hide what he don’t know to begin with in an independent Scotland?

534. Dancing at the disco, bumper to bumper – in an independent Scotland, where’s me jumper?

535. Ever fallen in love with someone you shouldn’t have fallen in love with in an independent Scotland?

536. All my people, right here, right now – d’you know what I mean in an independent Scotland?

537. You know I hate to ask, but are ‘friends’ electric in an independent Scotland?

538. Why don’t we do it in the road in an independent Scotland?

539. Where do we go from here? Is it down to the lake in an independent Scotland, I fear?

540. What costume shall the poor girl wear to all tomorrow’s parties in an independent Scotland?

541. What was it to you that a man laid down his life for your love? Were those clear eyes of yours ever filled with the pain of tears of grief? Did you ever give yourself to one man in this whole world? Or did you love me, and will you find your way back one day to Xanadu, in an independent Scotland?

542. Have you seen your mother, baby, standing in the shadow in an independent Scotland?

543. How do we solve a problem like Maria in an independent Scotland?

544. Grocer Jack, Grocer Jack, is it true what Mummy said – you won’t come back in an independent Scotland?

545. Did you think I would leave you crying, when there’s room on my horse for two in an independent Scotland?

546. Thurston! Watt! Thurston! I think it’s ten thirty, we’re calling from Providence, Rhode Island. Did you find your shit in an independent Scotland?

547. What’s new in an independent Scotland, pussycat?

548. Who’s the black private dick that’s a sex-machine to all the chicks in an independent Scotland?

549. Baby, where did our love go in an independent Scotland?

550. Jeepers creepers, where’d you get those peepers in an independent Scotland?

551. Voulez-vous coucher avec moi in an independent Scotland, ce soir?

552. Do you plan to let me go for some other guy you knew before in an independent Scotland?

553. Whose bed have your boots been under? And whose heart did you steal, I wonder? This time did it feel like thunder in an independent Scotland, baby?

554. What if this party fears two in an independent Scotland?

555. Are we men, or are we Devo?

Join in any time!

Subscribe
Notify of
guest

691 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Ray

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but will chains and whips still excite me in an independent Scotland?

The only half-decent one I put on Twitter!

scottish_skier

How many roads must a man walk down in an independent Scotland?
Before he admits he’s lost anyway.

mogabee

 
Twist and shake in an Independent Scotland?

Eva

Are you lonesome tonight in an independent Scotland?

scottish_skier

559. Will February make me shiver in an independent Scotland?

mogabee

 
 A sense of purpose (a real sense of purpose ) in an Independent Scotland?

Joybell

Will there be a long and winding road in an independent Scotland?

Mister Worf

Why oh Why oh Why oh Why oh – will that still spell yoyoyoyo in an independent Scotland?

Have you seen this dog in an independent Scotland?

(Important one for me) Will Klingons still have to be off the starboard bow in an independent Scotland?

Will Captain Britain still protect an independent Scotland or will the fact barely anyone knows who he is still mean he’s completely useless?

Will “Nanomachines, Son!” be an acceptable answer for everything in an independent Scotland?

Will an independent Scotland force the rUK to replace trident with Metal Gear?

METAL GEAR?!

Snake?

Snake?!

SNAAAAAAKE!

Who was phone in an independent Scotland?

Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like in an independent Scotland?

Will we still be subjects of the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air in an independent Scotland?

Where on earth is Carmen Sandiego in an independent Scotland?

Where’s Wally in an independent Scotland?

scottish_skier

555. Are we men, or are we Devo?
🙂
560. Who wants want to live forever in an independent Scotland?
 

mogabee

 
 Do I predict a riot in an Independent Scotland?

Heather McLean

Hahahaha!! I thought I was reading a BBC Scotlandshire effort there for a moment! Love it Rev! 

Joybell

Will my chewing gum lose its flavour on the bedpost in an independent Scotland?

scottish_skier

562. Is this the final countdown to an independent Scotland?

Lobeydosser

563.  Will the stars fall down from the sky. Every time you walk by in an Independent Scotland

Marcia

Will things be Chirpy Chirpy Cheep Cheep in an Independent Scotland?

YesYesYes

Will Ziggy still be playing guitar with Weird and Gilly in an independent Scotland?
 
Will the coloured girls still go, ‘doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo’ in an independent Scotland?
 
Will the Valley Girls still be ‘ok, fine, for sure, for sure, in an independent Scotland?

themadmurph

will we be looking through Gary Gilmour’s eyes in an independent Scotland?

Erchie

564. When there’s something weird, in your neighbourhood, who you gonna call in an independant Scotland?

Marcia

Will there be March Winds and April Showers in an Independent Scotland?

Alasdair Mark

Well I’ve read a good amount of the literature available and considered myself a fairly solid Yes voter. However, I’ve just got to question number 160:-
What will be Air Passenger Duty /taxation regime for private planes?

You’ve won me over Better Together, how can I deal with this level of uncertainty…

Ron

I can’t see it, but I cant believe it’s not here yet ….
 Damn. it is. (thinking cap on … )

Morag

Gin a body meet a body, comin through the rye, gin a body greet a body, need a body cry [in an independent Scotland]?

Tris

When you’re alone and life is making you lonely will you still be able to go Downtown in an independent Scotland?

Kendomacaroonbar

Salmondchanted evening..in an independent Scotland ?

AmadeusMinkowski

#500questions trending in UK! 🙂
link to twitter.com

Ron

Are we human, or are we dancer … in an independent Scotland?
 
(hah!)

Morag

Will ye no come back again?  [in an independent Scotland]

inverisla

Are we not men? we are devo! I think is the correct quotation…….great list!
 
 
 
 
 

Ron

Doctor Who? in an independent Scotland.
(v. poor)

Kendomacaroonbar

Will we be allowed to drive on the left and use vowels in an ndpndnt Scotland ?

scottish_skier

566. If I went back in time and killed my grandfather in an independent Scotland, would I still exist?

Yesitis

At first I was afraid
I was petrified
kept thinking I could never live without you by my side
But then I spent so many nights
thinking how you did me wrong
and I grew strong
and I learned how to get along in an independent Scotland.

 

cynicalHighlander

What colour will the traffic lights be in an independent Scotland?

pmcrek

Mah Nà Mah Nà Do doo be-do-do, Mah Nà Mah Nà Do do-do do, Mah Nà Mah Nà Do doo be-do-do be-do-do be-do-do be-do-do-doodle Do do do-doo do, in an independent Scotland?

 

YesYesYes

Will it still be easy when we yahbahdahbahdoo in an independent Scotland?

molly

Hi Rev, was meandering through the Belfast News and came across a link to a’ future for Catalans outside of Spain’ which then linked through to the Wilson Initiative. Really interesting on Catalonias economic outlook (by experts ) and also the role of the media BUT I do not know how to embed/link the articles ?
Will computing for eejits still be free in an Independent Scotland ?

Kendomacaroonbar

Will we have better weather if we have our own Met Office in Scotland ?

Tim

How long will a piece of string be in an independent Scotland?

Ron

Will we be dismissed as “cybernats” for simply voicing an opinion, in an independent Scotland?
 
(no.)

Ron

Will my toast land butter-side up in an independent Scotland? Why doesn’t Salmond come clean on this important issue?

AmadeusMinkowski

An Auld Alliance contribution to #500questions
<blockquote class=”twitter-tweet”><p>Voulez-vous coucher avec moi dans une Ecosse independent, ce soir? <a href=”https://twitter.com/search/%23500questions”>#500questions</a></p>&mdash; Andrew Haddow (@andrew_haddow) <a href=”https://twitter.com/andrew_haddow/status/331525440126730242″>May 6, 2013</a></blockquote>
<script async src=”//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js” charset=”utf-8″></script>

Kendomacaroonbar

Can we still use GMT in an independent Scotland ?

Iain mcewan

I don’t want to change the world I’m just looking for new England in an independent Scotland?

Geoff Huijer

572. Tell me why I don’t like Mondays in an independent Scotland

Lobeydosser

Will we be able to make the Kessel Run in 12 parsecs in an Independent Scotland

Indion

 
Should Scotland be an independent country in an independent Scotland?

AmadeusMinkowski

An Auld Alliance contribution to #500questions taken from twitter:
“Voulez-vous coucher avec moi dans une Ecosse independent, ce soir?”
***************
* Rev., apologies for the previous garbled-link of mine just above.

pmcrek

Will every day still be caturday in an independent Scotland?

Geoff Huijer

569. What do you want from life (The Tubes) in an independent Scotland?

Gordon Hay

Will every picture tell a story in an independent Scotland?

mogabee

570. Have we any wool in an Independent Scotland?

Ron

Will we only get a per-capita share of the UK air in an independent Scotland?

mogabee

Damn..too slow !!

Geoff Huijer

571. Should I stay or should I go in an independent Scotland? (stay!)

Kendomacaroonbar

Will gravity be taken seriously in an independent Scotland or is it running out ?

Ron

Can I still get Sky Atlantic in an independent Scotland!?

Jiggsbro

Should I stay in an independent Scotland or should I go?
 

MajorBloodnok

What direction will water go down the plughole in an independent Scotland?

pmcrek

Oh ye canny shuv yer Grannie aff a bus in an independent Scotland?

Jiggsbro

What’s the name of the game in an independent Scotland?
 
What do you get when you fall in love in an independent Scotland?

Boabyfett

Will the TARDIS still travel in time and space in an independent Scotland?

YesYesYes

Will the cool wind blow in Ian Taylor’s hair as he hands a brown envelope to Alistair Darling on a dark, desert highway in an independent Scotland?

Mad Jock McMad

I am worried for Schrodinger’s cat if Scotland is independent – will he be in the box or not?

Kendomacaroonbar

Will skid marks still be out of 10 in an independant Scotland ?

Lurker in the wings

Will you Take me to the dance and hold me tight
                I want to see the bright lights tonight
 In an Independent Scotland.

 

Baheid

Will l have sunshine on a cloudy day in an independent Scotland.
 

Derick

The Tay will teem with frogs in an Independent Scotland. They will come up into your palace and your bedroom and onto your bed, into the houses of your officials and on your people, and into your ovens and kneading troughs.
ribit
ribit
ribit
and will the fridge light stay on when we close the door in an Independent Scotland (no, because of the Darkness obviously)

Albert Herring

What’s the time in an independent Scotland, Mr Wolf?

Kendomacaroonbar

We we still be able to send England food parcels from an independent Scotland ?

cynicalHighlander

Will gravity still work in an independent Scotlad

Jiggsbro

Will I still be too sexy for this shirt in an independent Scotland?

Karamu

It (500 questions) talks about the Post Office as though it delivers some sort of amazing service….I beg to differ! Hey, may be we will get a guarantee of two deliveries a day (you know like we used to).

Jiggsbro

I’m a loser baby, so why don’t you kill me in an independent Scotland?

Derick

Will we see clearly when the rain is gone, in an Independent Scotland?
OH YES
albeit the bastard midgies may still obscure the view

AmadeusMinkowski

Will it still be called the Higgs Boson in an Independent Scotland?

Jiggsbro

What if I say I’m not like the others? What if I say I’m not just another one of your plays in an independent Scotland?

AmadeusMinkowski

Will Pythagoras’ Theorem still hold in an Independent Scotland?

Hetty

we’re on a road to nowhere, without an independent Scotland…
will it be raining men? in an independent Scotland?
 

Kendomacaroonbar

Will we Tie a yellow ribbon round an old oak tree in an independent Scotland ?

Jiggsbro

Tommy, can you hear me in an independent Scotland?

pmcrek

Will three positive integers a, b, and c satisfy the equation an + bn = cn for any integer value of n greater than two in a seperate Scotland?

fizzinghumanbomb

will my g-spot still be up my arse in an independent scotland?

AmadeusMinkowski

Does hope still die last in an Independent Scotland?

cynicalHighlander

Will tomorrow ever arrive in an independent Scotland

scotty

what is the sound of one hand clapping in an independent Scotland?

muttley79

You were working as a waitress in a cocktail bar when I met you in an independent Scotland.

Jiggsbro

Where will bears shit in an independent Scotland?

kininvie

And, as #500questions trends everywhere to universal ridicule on Twitter, DH tweets that the ‘important thing was to get it trending’. There are positive trends….and there are disasters. Most people can tell the difference.

cynicalHighlander

Will a bird in the hand be better than two in the bush in an independent Scotland?

HoraceSaysYes

Should auld acquaintance be forgot in an independent Scotland?
 
Is this love, is this love, is this love, is this love that I’m feeling in an independent Scotland?
 
Will you still look good on the dance floor in an independent Scotland?

The Man in the Jar

“Woke up this morning” in an independant Scotland

Kendomacaroonbar

Will tribute band Jockny Rebel be allowed to gig in an independent England ?

Frazzle dazzle darling

No no, no no nono,no no nono limits for an independent Scotland. More of a statement than a question. Can you pump up the jam tomorrow in a scotland duped into passing by the chance of a lifetime?

Baheid

Will l wait 40 mins for a bus then two will come along in an independent Scotland ?

jon abroad

 
What would you do if I sang out of tune,
would you stand up and walk out on me in an independent Scotland?
 
Say”Goodbye” with a little help from my friends in an independent Scotland.

The Man in the Jar

There`s no lights on the Christmas tree mama, they’re burning big Louie tonight. In an independent Scotland

Jiggsbro

How many beans will make five in an independent Scotland?

Marcia

Is it true the sun ain’t gonna shine anymore in an independent Scotland?

Lobeydosser

Will we serve strangers in blue suede shoes in an Independent Scotland?

Jiggsbro

Will I still be pretty fly for a white guy in an independent Scotland?

Iain

Jonathan Swift (1738) – “A fool can ask more questions than the wisest can answer.” True or false?

Patrick Roden

Will ‘Wee Willy Winky’ still run through the toon, upstairs doonstairs in his nightgoon,
In an Independent Scotland.

pmcrek

These are not the droids you are looking for in a seperate Scotland?

Kendomacaroonbar

Will Mackies ice cream still be made in Britain in an independent Scotland ?

mogabee

 
Will I be staring at your window with a suitcase in my hand in an Independent Scotland?

AmadeusMinkowski

Will CYBERNAT still mean “Countering Your British Establishments Relentless Negativity and Tripe” in an Independent Scotland? #500questions

The Man in the Jar

Tomorrow belongs to me. In an independent Scotland

Jiggsbro

Will I be able to get you out of my head in an independent Scotland?

Kendomacaroonbar

What will be the cost of a shot on the dodgems in an independent Scotland..Salmond needs to come clean !

BuckieBraes

Is it live or is it Memorex in an independent Scotland?

Kendomacaroonbar

Will north sea gas smell saltier in an independent Scotland ?

Nairn

I’ve heard that in an independent Scotland, not only will there be no mice, buzzards or toasters, but all pop songs will have to be re-written to replace any foreign place names with Scottish ones. Does this mean it’ll now go ‘Hot Dog, Jumping Frog, Auchtermuchty?’ just after they play ‘Do You Know The Way To Auchenblae?’ What is the SNP’s plan to deal with this?
Still – at least that Abba song won’t need to change. So that’s something.

Lobeydosser

Will Frightened Rabbit feel safe in an Independent Scotland?

YesYesYes

Will Ian Smart ever learn to sing the world is black, the world is white in an independent Scotland?
 
How much will that doggy in the window be in an independent Scotland?

Morgwn C Davies

Where have all the flowers gone in an independent Scotland?

Kendomacaroonbar

Will Frankie Goes to Holyrood in an independent Scotland ?
 
 
 

Marcia

Will it still be  Breakin’ Up Is Hard To Do in an Independent Scotland

The Man in the Jar

Give peace a chance. In an Independent Scotland
Power to the people. In an Independent Scotland
Whatever gets you through the night. In an independent Scotland
Stand by me. In an independent Scotland
Just like starting over. In an independent Scotland
I’m losing you. In an independent Scotland
Watching the wheels go round. In an independent Scotland
John Lennon was an indie. Who knew?

Kendomacaroonbar

Will it might as well rain until September because we have so many MacLeods in an independent Scotland ?

ron17

Imagine All The Freedom in an Independant Scotland.

Kendomacaroonbar

To see a future grandchild in an independent Scotland…Imagine 

scotty

if you go will you send back a letter from America to an independent Scotland?

Lobeydosser

Will a Scotsman an Englishman and an Irishman still be able to walk into a bar in an Independent Scotland.

Ron

Will this beat your previous most-commented blog post Stu … (in an independent Scotland)

Yesitis

Will Cowdenbeath win European City of Culture 2018 in an independent Scotland?

mogabee

 
Will I be Queen of New Orleans in an Independent Scotland?

Kendomacaroonbar

What will the price of mince be in an independent Scotland ?

Morgwn C Davies

Who crying now in an independent Scotland?

Kendomacaroonbar

Will border collies need passports in an independent Scotland ?

Michael Granados

Who says Scots don’t have a sense of humor…  I’ve been howling reading through all this.  500 questions is an amazing gift from the no campaign.  Please say you are going to post answer and mock one question a day till the referendum!

YesYesYes

Will Susan Calman still be crying over you in an independent Scotland?

pmcrek

Will the sand people still ride in single file to hide their numbers in a seperate Scotland?

Jiggsbro

Will she be born with it in an independent Scotland or will it be Maybelline?

mogabee

 
Baby it’s cold outside in an Independent Scotland…isn’t it?

cynicalHighlander

Will it still take 24hrs to Tulsa in an Independent Scotland?
 

Kendomacaroonbar

Will MP3 players have to be converted to MSP3 players in an independent Scotland ?

HighlandMartin

Will these voices in my head still have a scottish accent in an Independent Scotland.

BuckieBraes

Will I ever get used to not living next door to Alice in an independent Scotland (for example if I was in Coldstream and she was in Cornhill on Tweed)?

Kendomacaroonbar

Will English mustard cut it in an independent Scotland ?

cynicalHighlander

Will GMS be linked to a cartoon channel in an independent Scotland?

megz

my absolute favourite was Chris Stephens “Would you like me to be the cat?” totally pmsl at that one

HighlandMartin

Can you still Voulez Vous in an Independent Scotland.

Kendomacaroonbar

Will Glen Campbell be a malt whisky in an independent Scotland ?

Lobeydosser

 Which direction will Swallows fly come the winter, in an Independent Scotland?                
 Will Santa still come down the chimney in an Independent Scotland?

Morag

Will MP3 players have to be converted to MSP3 players in an independent Scotland ?
 
Bwahahahaha!

cynicalHighlander

Kendomacaroonbar says:
6 May, 2013 at 11:49 pm

Will Glen Campbell be a malt whisky in an independent Scotland ?
 
Scrag End at best or Tripe.

scotty

if i were  a Carpenter,and you were a lady,would you marry me anyway in an independent Scotland
 

Steve McKay

Way down deep in dependant Embro
The Tories joined the LibLabs and formed a moneyfesto
Emboldened like new lovers, they danced a dainty tango.
But poll dancing now forced them to call it Um…..Devo

Clancheif

One that gets banned from an independent Scotland
You wont get me i’m part of the union

pmcrek

The big ship sails, through the alley, alley oh. the alley, alley oh, the alley, alley oh. The big ship sails, on the alley, alley oh. On the last day of September in a seperate Scotland?

GP Walrus

Will Johann Lamont be available for comment in an independent Scotland?

hooch

Supercalifragile dipstick expi KY jelly in an independent Scotland? (Sorry)

David Smith

Hey Mr Spaceman, will you please take me along for a ride in an independent Scotland?

Morag

Guys, I know I’m not very good at this, but half of these aren’t questions, they’re just statements you’ve tacked a question on to.
 
Does haughty Gaul still invasion threat to an independent Scotland?

AmadeusMinkowski

Will Plank’s Uncertainty Principle become even more uncertain in an Independent Scotland?

Iain

What will the union flag look like if Scotland becomes independent?

Kendomacaroonbar

Will there be enough telephone numbers left in an indpendent Scotland ?

pmcrek

A cat, a flask of poison, and a radioactive source are placed in a sealed box. If an internal monitor detects radioactivity (i.e. a single atom decaying), the flask is shattered, releasing the poison that kills the cat. After how long can the cat be thought to be both simultaneously alive and dead in a seperate Scotland?

YesYesYes

Will Ian Smart still be waiting for an alibi in an independent Scotland?

Morag

Will we have to reinvent the wheel in an independent Scotland?

Clancheif

When will i, will i be famous in an independent Scotland

Lobeydosser

Will it still be ok to use a bucket n spade to make sandcastles in an Independent Scotland

GP Walrus

Will there still be colours in an independent Scotland or will everything go back to black and white like during WWII?

Kendomacaroonbar

Will the Edinburgh Fringe have to be coiffured to a more manageable ‘shed’ in an independent Scotland ?

AmadeusMinkowski

Will the Northern Lights still shine on an Independent Scotland?

cynicalHighlander

Will the residents of Dallas have to relocate to Dallas?

Baheid

Will Charlotte need planning permission for her web in an independent scotland 
 

GP Walrus

Will my bum look big in an independent Scotland?

Kendomacaroonbar

Will my shoe size become smaller in an independent Scotland ?

cynicalHighlander

Kendomacaroonbar says:
7 May, 2013 at 12:14 am

Will my shoe size become smaller in an independent Scotland ?
 
Your shoes will be the least of your worries!

Jiggsbro

In an independent Scotland, Doctor Who?

Kendomacaroonbar

CH
 
you’ve met my wife I guess >

Clarinda

Will Donald still be teased about his lack of troosers in an Independent Scotland?

Jiggsbro

How independent will we be in an independent Scotland if we still speak English?

Morag

Cosi fan Tutte in an independent Scotland?

The Man in the Jar

Will Jackie Baillie ever tell the truth in an independent Scotland?

Lobeydosser

Will cats still meow and dogs bow wow in an Independent Scotland?

Kendomacaroonbar

Will we see a return of white dog poo in an independent Scotland ?

Yesitis

Will Lake of Menteith be renamed Lake of Personteith in an independent Scotland?
 
Thanks Rev Stu and everybody, tonight has been good 🙂

jon abroad

 
Can you tell me where my country lies… an independent Scotland?
 
…selling England by the pound.

scotchwoman

Will Charlie Be My Darling in an Independent Scotland?
Will Alastair Still be their Darling in a rUK?

cynicalHighlander

Will we be Lonesome Tongiht in an independent Scotland?

Holebender

Haven’t read all the comments so apologies if someone has already asked this one: will 42 still be the ultimate answer to the ultimate question of life, the Universe, and everything in an independent Scotland?

Kendomacaroonbar

last un from me,,,,
 
Will the labour party ever become Scottish in an independent Scotland ?

Lobeydosser

Can we still ask for a full English breakfast in an Independent Scotland?

Baheid

Will Wullie Rennie still be as welcome as a hole in a lifeboat in an independent scotland

Lanarkian

If it takes a man a week to walk a fortnight in an independent Scotland, how many apples will there be in a barrel of grapes (Scottish ones) ?

G H Graham

Will one legged men still be allowed to compete in arse kicking competitions in an independent Scotland?

YesYesYes

Will Jock please stop tickling Elaine Murray at FMQs when Scotland becomes independent?

Lobeydosser

Will our water still be soft in an Independent Scotland?                                                            
 

G H Graham

Will we be informed before boarding buses & trains that “Your papers are NOT in order!” in an independent Scotland?

jon abroad

 
If I said I thought Susan Calman had a very strong animus, would you hold it against me?

The Man in the Jar

Will motorcycles have to be fitted with ashtrays in an independent Scotland?

GP Walrus

Will we still be allowed to have middle names, if we can afford them, in an independent Scotland?

Chic McGregor

Why? why? why? De Liars?  (apologies to Tom Jones)

Hello, is it Free your lookin for? (apologies to Lionel Ritchie)

Will U’s Still Love Me Tomorrow? (apologies to Carol King)

Finally, to switch from questions to answers, whether Scotland votes Yes or Scotland votes No, the answer when pro-independistas are asked about its status post referendum will be the SAME, albeit for diametrically opposed reasons  i.e. “We told you so.”

Robert Bryce

Will my socks still work in an independent Scotland?

G H Graham

666. Will the southbound carriageway of the M6 at Carlisle be nicknamed “Highway to Hell” in an independent Scotland.

Holebender

You may find yourself living in a shotgun shack You may find yourself in another part of the world You may find yourself behind the wheel of a large automobile You may find yourself in a beautiful house with a beautiful wife You may ask yourself, well, how did I get here? (in an independent Scotland)

Cath

Do you know the way to San Jose from an independent Scotland?

cynicalHighlander

Kendomacaroonbar says:
7 May, 2013 at 12:18 am

CH

you’ve met my wife I guess >
 
:;):

muttley79

Will everybody be homeless and unemployed in an independent Scotland? 

Clarinda

Will Lorne sausage have to be triangular in an Independent Scotland?

Cath

What are dark matter and dark energy? I’ve asked the SNP this numerous times and they cannot provide an answer.

G H Graham

888. Will Jackie Bailie stop munching through 11,000 calories a day in an independent Scotland?
 
(That’s the same number as the one she made up when she described how many jobs would be lost at Faslane/Coulport.)

The Man in the Jar

Will the sky still be blue in an independent Scotland?

Clarinda

Cath – we had enough problems with Gray matter until it disappeared into a sandwich franchise.

Jiggsbro

Will.i.am in an independent Scotland?

Doug Daniel

Oops, I’ve tweeted so many that I’ve reached my daily Twitter limit…

The Man in the Jar

Will Michael McMahon join the Orange Order in an independent Scotland?

Patrician

In L’Oreal adverts will they still say “because I’m worth it”? in an independent Scotland

The Man in the Jar

Will I have to live in a mud hut and forage for nuts and berries in an independent Scotland?

G H Graham

69. Who’s ya daddy ….. in an independent Scotland?

Baheid

Will things still go bump in the night in an independent Scotland ?

YesYesYes

Will I still have much in common with my long haired lover from Liverpool in an independent Scotland?

G H Graham

747. Strangers in the night. More or less likely that the groundlights will fail in an independent Scotland?

Holebender

AmadeusMinkowski says:
7 May, 2013 at 12:00 am

Will Plank’s Uncertainty Principle become even more uncertain in an Independent Scotland?

 

It’ll still be Heisenberg’s Uncertainty Principle!
 

YesYesYes

Momma, just killed a man in an independent Scotland.

G H Graham

999. When attempting to cross the English border at Carlisle, will we be refused entry by UK Border Agency staff dressed like the Gestapo, inexplicably announcing “Nein ! Nein! Nein!”, post independent Scotland?

Kendomacaroonbar

midges !!!!!

pmcrek

If a plane crashes on the border between England and a seperate Scotland, where will they bury the survivors?

Kirriereock

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood in an independence Scotland?
And, related to wood:
Will lumberjacks still be okay and be able to work all day and sleep all night in an independent Scotland? 

Jiggsbro

Would you rather fight one horse-sized duck or fifty duck-sized horses in an independent Scotland?
 

G H Graham

750. In an independent Scotland, will Dunkirk spirit be readily available duty free in 750cl bottles?

Clarinda

Will I have to slap my thigh with a wet Arbroath Smokie in an Independent Scotland?

Dal Riata

Will only fools rush in to an independent Scotland?
 
Will Jock stop his tickling, a-tickle-ickle-ickling in an independent Scotland?
 
Will Maggie wake up if think I have something to say to her in an independent Scotland?
 
If I’m in a band and it starts playing different tunes, will you see me on the dark side of the moon in an independent Scotland?
 
Will there be a hi, ho, silver lining, everywhere I go in an independent Scotland?

YesYesYes

Will Ruth Davidson in the name of love, stop asking her interminable questions at FMQs in an independent Scotland?

YesYesYes

Will Ed Miliband dig a pony in an independent Scotland?

Anne (@annewitha_e)

Are we there yet?

YesDivit

If George Osborne speaks in a forest with no-one around to hear it, is he still wrong?

Lobeydosser

The road is long with many a winding turn in an Independent Scotland

jon abroad

 
Lobey: damn. Beat me to it.
 
 
It’s a long long road, from which there is no return
While we’re on the way to there, why not share in an independent Scotland?

Etrigan

Will there still be Pot Noodles in an independent Scotland?

Jiggsbro

Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like in an independent Scotland?

Nairn

Will we still be able to contribute to random periodic bombings of Middle-Eastern states in an independent Scotland?
Will our national media still be largely controlled by one megalomaniacal Australian in an independent Scotland?
Will our beloved television and radio icons of the 1970s turn out to have been compulsive sexual predators with a truly depressing, yet astonishing regularity in an independent Scotland?

Well, we’re going for 500, right?

Anne (@annewitha_e)

will there be more pandas than conservative AND Liberal MSPs in an independent Scotland?

Lobeydosser

Will symbiotic relationships be allowed in an Independent Scotland?

Lobeydosser

Will dust still gather in the same places in an independent Scotland?

Lobeydosser

Thanks Rev Stu.  This has been fun, never posted here before as I fear I’m not as articulate as some nor as witty as others. I enjoy this site so much and I’d recommend it to anyone interested in the debate. Anyhoo, night night all, its been a pleasure.

Etrigan

Can we still have an independent Scotland in an independent Scotland?

Dal Riata

Will you be walking on broken glass in an independent Scotland?
 
Will you be able to hide your lyin’ eyes in an independent Scotland?
 
If you look for a job and then you find a job, will heaven know you’re miserable then in an independent Scotland?
 
Will they know it’s Christmas time at all in an independent Scotland?
 
Who’s going to pay attention to your dreams, plug their ears when you scream and then drive you home tonight in an independent Scotland?

scotty

would i still be considered left handed in an independent Scotland?

Matt

246. Will the M8 have to be renamed the M1 in an independent Scotland?

Will Elizabeth II have to be renamed Elizabeth I in an independent Scotland?

Taranaich

Let’s get a Metal Injection into proceedings:
 
Would you still bring your daughter to the slaughter in an independent Scotland?
 
Revolution in their minds, will the children start to march against the world in which they have to live and all the hate that’s in their hearts in an Independent Scotland?
 
Will electric eyes take a pride in probing all our secret moves, and will their tearless retinas takes pictures that can prove, in an independent Scotland?
 
Will 6, 6 6, be the Number Of The Beast in an independent Scotland?
 
Will the only card you need in an independent Scotland be the Ace of Spades?
 
In an independent Scotland, can you hear the banshee scream?
 
Will light still be required to exit and night to enter upon the Sandman’s coming in an independent Scotland?
 
Will the Metal Inquisition sentence you to death by guillotine in an independent Scotland?
 
In the event of heavy metal or no metal at all, will the wimps and posers in an independent Scotland leave the hall?