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Wings Over Scotland


Posted on January 02, 1968 by

For off-topic chat. Duh.

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    39864 to “Off-topic”

    1. Michael McCabe says:

      Nana I know you like guitarists. I found this and I thought you would like this. never seen an instrument like that before. pretty good sound though.

    2. Michael McCabe says:

      @ Paula Rose. Curtains

    3. Scott says:

      Tory farming spokesman, Peter Chapman MSP called on the SNP to ditch its β€œanti-science” approach which led to the Government’s GM ruling last year and instead make decisions based on evidence rather than ideology.

      As this person is a farmer who gets a good deal of money from the EU and I would think GM crops would give him even more is it right for him to be the Tory spokesperson on farming is it not a conflict of interest but then again is it not the tory way look after our own.

    4. Smallaxe says:

      Michael McCabe, Thank’s for the song Michael, I had an early night last night.


    5. The Proctor Lewis says:

      Hello Smallaxe

      I did jump to your defence from the cruel Blog Master General, and his frankly Vile hammers. But my link to his nemesis MC Hammer (Don’t Hurt ‘Em) was rejected by his security who have embargoed all photos of the Rev in his baggy jodhpur’s dancing like a crabbit git.
      peace and love


    6. Smallaxe says:

      Hello, Procter Lewis my good friend, thank you for your attempt to come to my defence, many of my good friends here on Wings did so also, as you will have seen.

      I hope every thing is going well with you and the family. I know that you are still fighting the good fight and will continue to do so, as will I. πŸ™‚

      Celtic Battle Song

      I hope to hear from you soon my Friend

    7. David says:

      Oil and the Unknown Region

      (Tweets wot I wrote.)

      – A reallocation in oil trade stats from “no region” to Scotland.
      Truth will out.
      #YouYesYet, because #IBloodyWellAm.

      – Why did WMs crooks & liars need to hide Scotland’s immense wealth, through the use of the “Extra-Regio” or “Unknown Region” fiction?
      – Question to a unionist “Have you read the McCrone Report?” Their answer “I have not read it, but know what it’s about.” Dearie me!

      – So then, we produced oil for decades from a magical unknown fairy region, aye right!

      – Every single Scottish oil well is meticulously plotted to within a metre.
      To not classify them as Scottish was a deliberate WM/Treasury lie.

      – Try it yourself on a tax return, just for fun:
      “Ahem yes, I received some income from an unknown region.”
      You’ll be pulled up straight away by the taxman.

      – Westminster gov’t for 40 yrs has said “oh we found some magic beans err I mean oil&gas in a mystery unknown region that’s definitely not Scotland…”

      – “…even though it is in Scotland’s Territorial Waters as recognised by us and by international treaties. Still, Magic, eh! Cannae beat it!”

      – It’s like something out of Harry Potter, The Unknown Region Spell for Removing Rightful Revenue Allocations:


      All that subterfuge, over forty years (and counting) for the sole purpose of obscuring exactly how much wealth and export revenues are generated from Scottish sources.

      No wonder the McCrone Report was hushed up by both the Labour and Tory parties for decades.

      Westminster wanted to keep Scotland in the dark about the massive opportunities that North Sea oil would provide. Now the cat is out of the bag, and unionists are scrambling to find some way to deny the truth about both Scotland’s stolen wealth and the UK state’s deliberate lies and coverups.

    8. Nana says:


      Are there any wingers who can help a Male PHD Student at Aberdeen Uni who is looking for someone to share a 2 bed flat, rent Β£362.50 PCM/PP. Six month lease and monthly thereafter. Modern top floor flat with private parking.

      Alternatively if he can’t find someone to share he will need to let the flat go and find a room or flat share, somewhere in the King Street area. Can anyone help?

    9. Paula Rose says:

      I have just had a chat with one of the greatest people on Wings Pete the Camera

    10. Smallaxe says:

      Cactus @ 1:34am M/T; Don’t forget these guys,

      Junior Campbell:”Hallelujah Freedom”

      Dean Ford: “Doing Something”

    11. Cactus says:

      You betcha Smallaxe, them tunes are in there too!

      On the day and on the hour…

    12. Smallaxe says:

      Good man, Cactus, qu’est-ce que c’est? you may ask, I’m posting this for the uninitiated as you mentioned it last night.

      Talking Heads: “Stop Making Sense” (1984) 1:27:47

      We’re on the road to somewhere fa fa fa far better than the www. “Psycho Killer”.gov, fa fa fa far better;

    13. Cactus says:

      Hehe excellent Smallaxe, that Talkin’ Heids ’84 gig is genius!

      Makes ye feel like run run run running away from the you you kay.

      Well, we know where we’re going…

    14. Liz g says:

      Thanks for the welcome back.
      Didn’t think to say I would be away for a few days,and didn’t think anyone would notice.
      Was over on the main land EU getting myself a lovely new sister in law.

      Just catching up…..oh man Wingers canny half post.. LOL.
      But great to see you back in full flight,after you had been poorly.
      Stay well my friend and love to Mrs Smallaxe XX

    15. Brian Doonthetoon says:

      Hi Smallaxe.

      Your mention of Talking Heads reminded me of this.

      I was introduced to it in 1976, while visiting a guy called Phil Blacklaw, who was a hospital radio dj.

      It’s always struck me as a classic ‘pop’ tune.

      ‘The smell of burning leather as we hold each other tight.
      As our rivets rub together, flashing sparks into the night.
      This moment of surrender, darling, if you really care,
      Don’t touch me there…’

      ‘Unzip that jacket…’

    16. Rock says:

      Alex Clark,

      “What happened to your Truth Always sign off Rock? Scared to get tin canned?”

      Rev. Stuart Campbell,

      “β€œIf yer gonnae shout and ball at Smallaxe and he’s only been back on for a few days, for signing off β€œPeace Always” why haven’t you been having ago at that prick Rock, who’s been sarcastically signing off with β€˜Truth Always’ for the past few weeks?”

      Because I hadn’t noticed. Consider it applied to him too.”

      Yes, it was sarcastic to stop Smallaxe’s nonsense which had been going on for quite a while.

      WOS is a Scottish political blog, but the usual suspects want to turn it into a cosy chatting site.

    17. Rock says:


      “do not mistake a man who asks for peace for a pacifist.”

      Are you showing your true colours?

      As I said, Axe in one hand, Bible/Koran in the other?

    18. Brian Doonthetoon says:

      There are times when, after reading some shit on the web, I just want to type,


      But I don’t, because I’m an easy-going sort of guy.

      Sometimes you wonder about peeps. So, I retire from the literal fray and go and make my supper, the making and consuming of which gives me a great deal of pleasure – a lot more pleasure than some contributors to WOS seem to have in their sorry lives.

      I’ll leave this here, for anyone who feels it may apply to their own persona; those who seek their own pleasure in strange ways.

    19. K1 says:

      You’re a sad wanker, that’s the truth…always.

    20. Liz g says:

      Always did like your insights…
      Noo here comes the ah never insult anybody but they all do it tae me whine…
      And we are aw supposed to ignore the admission that things were personal towards Smallaxe in every post for weeks!
      And it’s Smallaxe who said not a word about it.

    21. cearc says:

      Oi! Somebody’s trodden in something and walked it all across the conservatory carpet.

      Even the lemon blossom can’t mask the smell.

    22. Brian Doonthetoon says:

      This is what happens when you invite others – you know, OTHERS, into ‘off-topic’.

    23. yesindyref2 says:

      It’ll all come out in the wash.

      Is this Rock?

    24. Smallaxe says:

      Hi, everybody, thanks for your posts, I have been out for most of the day and have only just seen them.
      ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ. Make up your own insult, I can’t be arsed and tell your boss Pearson that I was asking for him. Axe in both hands!

    25. Big Phil says:

      YE may take my land but ye’ll never take my Smallaxe.
      Its like a bully picking on the one that they see as being the biggest threat yet out of all wingers he’s the one that holds dear most of all what we all hold close(compassion to all). Rock is just a fanny.

      @ Liz g,
      Exactly as you said, he never utters a word of hate, and not once did he retaliate. lessons to be learned by all.

      Peace always BIGaxe.

    26. Smallaxe says:

      Peace Always to you, Phil, my Friend.

      Elvis Presley: “Trouble”: King Creole 1958 HD – complete scene

      Thank you, Phil

    27. Ghillie says:

      Nana and Smallaxe, think I’ve missed something.

      You guys ok ?

      Peace and Love = )

      The very best message we could ever send out into the World πŸ™‚

    28. Smallaxe says:

      Ghillie; Peace and Love, Nana asked me to let you, Macart, Dorothy and others who read her links know that she has some business to take care of and then she will be having a short break.

      I will keep you all updated if there is any other news, my friend.

    29. K1 says:

      Ghillie, all Nana’s links where posted on the ‘magic money rig’ thread this morning, both Nana and Smallaxe were about earlier today πŸ™‚

    30. Alex Clark says:

      @Ian Brotherhood

      Can you post that North Ayrshire SSP youtube video again where it was freezing in late 2013 or early 2014 an you guys were freezing outside a Better Together meeting room handing out leaflets.

      I asking for a friend, I couldn’t find it on Yewchoob.

      @Michael McCabe
      Sent you an email about tomorrow.

      @Paula Rose
      Work put back until Friday, do you want to come along tomorrow?

    31. Paula Rose says:

      That’s a shame Alex cos I’ve now made plans – going to be giving this place a deep clean after a certain unwelcome visitor.

    32. Alex Clark says:

      No problem Paula. Get the disinfectant out.

    33. Alex Clark says:

      After the state this place was left in yesterday it is time for a clean up.

      Thepnr awoke by the alarm gets out of bed and heads off to the fridge. Meantime Paula is taking care of the hovering while Nana reads the paper for the latest news and Smallaxe puts the kettle on. Ian Brotherhood does the washing up.

      Then Theprn puts his feet up and watches the day go by.

      Job done πŸ™‚

    34. Michael McCabe says:

      Hi Alex I will see your email and I will raise you this.

    35. Smallaxe says:

      Meanwhile, Smallaxe ponders on Coprolite! and,
      “The State of the Union”

    36. yesindyref2 says:

      I’m not entirely convinced that this whole thing isn’t a put-up job to get more publicity. Well, it’s working!

    37. Ghillie says:

      Oh thanks K1 !

      Smallaxe πŸ™‚

      Hope Nana’s stuff goes well = )

      Have a lovely evening folks πŸ™‚

    38. Smallaxe says:

      Ghillie, did you miss my reply to you?
      Smallaxe says:
      12 August 2017 at 2:56 pm
      Have a Song, Its a Beautiful Day: “White Bird”

    39. yesindyref2 says:

      It does seem the YES natives are getting restless. YES!

      Here’s the movers and shakers of the YES movement.

    40. yesindyref2 says:

      Mmm, won’t be long (I hope) before we’re all dancing to the same tune again.

    41. Ghillie says:

      Smallaxe, yes I did get your msj:)

      Oh thank you for that lovely song ! White Bird = )

      Takes me back!

      What a lovely start to the day = )

      Have a lovely and happy day folks πŸ™‚

    42. Michael McCabe says:

      A nice wee mellow tune to start a Sunday Morning.

    43. Smallaxe says:

      Good morning, Gillie & Michael, here’s another Sunday song,

      “Beautiful Sunday” Daniel Boone (1972

    44. Michael McCabe says:

      Morning Smallaxe. I am just popping out for a few hours to go and see the bold Alex at the fringe. By the way it is Alex Clark,s Birthday today. Happy Birthday Alex.

    45. Smallaxe says:

      Hi, Michael, enjoy yourselves!

      Happy Birthday Alex

    46. Smallaxe says:

      BTW, Alex, you share a birthday with this guy.

      “A Voice For Peace” Dan Fogelberg;

    47. cearc says:

      Happy birthday, Alex.

      Hope you had a good day.

    48. Liz g says:

      Happy Birthday Alex,and many more of them….in an independent Scotland ofcourse.

    49. The Proctor Lewis says:

      Happy birthday Alex

    50. Alex Clark says:

      Thanks for the birthday wishes, much appreciated. had a good day with Michael McCabe, Tam Jardine and my wife of course.

      Was an absolute shocker when I saw that Alex Salmonds guest (pal) was one David Davis the Brexit Secretary. As you would expect though the Edinburgh audience gave him a fair hearing.

      I really enjoyed it, wife not so much. She thought Alex Salmond should have told us more about dodgy deals etc LOL. Still he was very entertaining and is a natural with his audience.

      So a good treat for my birthday and now time to turn in after catching up with all the latest posts and news where we are.


      Passed on your regards to Michael and he asked me to return them, a little something for you too that can wait a few weeks πŸ™‚

    51. Smallaxe says:

      Och, Alex, noo ye’ve goat me awe excited.

    52. Brian Doonthetoon says:

      Hi Alex Clark at 11.55.

      Belated happy birthday!

      You typed,
      “So a good treat for my birthday and now time to turn in after catching up with all the latest posts and news where we are.”

      Like this, perchance?

    53. Alex Clark says:


      Speechless!!!! Smiled all the way through, just CLASS!

      @Brian Doonthetoon

      Well you had a hard act to follow and you did it with aplomb πŸ™‚ That had me smile and laugh. Wings is a tonic. Cheers Brian.

    54. Tinto Chiel says:

      Heard this recently and liked it. Vid a bit creepy, frankly, but I have been tree hugging and communing with Pictish stones.

      The alder and the rowan cleanse my spirit, groovers.

      Paula Rose: could run you up a few curtains si tu l’en veut, ma cherie.

    55. Smallaxe says:

      It’s still Monday

    56. Tinto Chiel says:

      And to The Artist Formerly Known As Thepnr:

      Been away so missed it.

    57. Smallaxe says:

      Tinto says, Paula Rose: “could run you up a few curtains”

      Factiod*1: Squirrels can run up curtains!

      Factiod*2: Tinto and Paula Rose can’t run up curtains!

      This is fake news at its most blatant!

      This is a wee song; πŸ™‚

    58. Tinto Chiel says:

      You’re a terrible man, Smallaxe.

      I find Turkish pines strangely attractive, btw…….


      Pinus brutia, ya bass.

    59. Smallaxe says:

      Pinus brutia: Gallipoli Lone Pine Tree; There is a lot of history in that tree, Tinto, as you probably know.

      Ben Howard:”Old Pine”

    60. Tinto Chiel says:

      Indeed, Smallaxe. Did Churchill lose any sleep? I think we both know the answer to that one.

      Saw it everywhere on Rhodes: a lovely, broad, open green pine, with handsome dark cones.

      Never heard BH before but really enjoyed it.

      Totnes is groovy too, at least when I was there in 1992 (!).

      Time flies, Wingers……

    61. David says:

      The Turkish pine for you too, Tinto Chiel.
      You must have made a good impression on them.

      In other news, Smallaxe filled in a survey about pub food. He was asked if he ate his pie with chips or with peas.
      He said:

      Peas Always

    62. Smallaxe says:

      Time flies, Wingers…Time Travel and move Westminster to where it belongs; 😎

      The Time Traveller song;

    63. Smallaxe says:

      Tinto, about Totnes…

      “Totnes Bickering Fair” Half Man Half Biscuit;

    64. Tinto Chiel says:

      “The Turkish pine for you too, Tinto Chiel.”

      Heehee, David. I hope not…… πŸ˜›

      The Cameronian (Scottish Rifles) Museum in Hamilton has some rather unpleasant details regarding their troops who surrendered to the Turks during the fighting around The Redan (not the pub beyond Maryhill) in WW1.

      It turns out the Scottish troops were subject to sexual assault, a fair consequence of their surrender in Turkish eyes.

      War stinks, indeed.

    65. Tinto Chiel says:

      Half man, half biscuit: Mr Tunnock, I presume?

      Haven’t bought any of that stuff since 2014, Smallaxe, mon vieux.

      I buy the generic bikkies you can find in Aldi/Lidl.

      I feel better now.

    66. David says:

      Oops, tried to post a video but forgot to remove the http bit, d’oh. Sorry, Rev.

      Just joking around, hope that was clear in my post. Respect to Tinto and Smallaxe.

      And now for some culture, from Spike Jones and his City Slickers

    67. Smallaxe says:

      Respect, we can live with that David, you just gotta believe,

      “I believe I can Fly”

    68. Tinto Chiel says:

      Nae probs, David, mon vieux.

      Moff up wood hill to Bedfordshire, masel’.

      Bonne nuit!

    69. Smallaxe says:

      Night Night Tinto, here’s a wee lullaby

      “Blue Jay Way” The Beatles;

    70. Smallaxe says:

      John Denver: Peace Poem & “Last Night I Had The Strangest Dream”

      We are all allowed to Dream


    71. Liz g says:

      Aye fine you lot ..
      It might be a good night for all of you!!
      But cause of all your chit chatting…. now I have the munchies !!!!
      No fur anything Tunnocks right enough.
      Anyhoo…. Sweet lovely crazy people X

    72. Macart says:

      No Nana today?

      I haven’t been about much myself recently, but hoping Nana’s OK.

    73. Smallaxe says:

      Hi, Macart, please see Nana’s post @
      Nana says:
      10 August, 2017 at 10:21 pm
      and my own @ Smallaxe says:
      12 August 2017 at 2:56 pm
      Ghillie; Peace and Love, Nana asked me to let you, Macart, Dorothy etc.

      Hopefully, Nana will be back soon, my Friend. πŸ™‚

    74. Tinto Chiel says:

      “Thanks”, Smallaxe for Blue Jay Way. Creepy!

      Sweet dreams says Liz g. In fact hadad a nightmare involving Malcolm Muggeridge and Ann Widdecombe and am still a bit shaky.

      Going out for some fresh air and wholesome thoughts.

      “Hello trees, hello birds, hello sky!”

    75. Macart says:

      Thanks Smallaxe. πŸ™‚

    76. Smallaxe says:

      @ Macart, you’re most welcome, my friend.

      @ Morning, Tinto;

      Joolz:”Hello Sky, Birds & Trees”

    77. Tinto Chiel says:

      Obscure American band pens love letter to Nana:

      Where’s Fred? He usually likes a good tree.

    78. Smallaxe says:

      Tinto, anent Fred, there’s been a terrible accident.

      Fred- A man and a tree

      Sad intit?

    79. yesindyref2 says:

      That link from RJS in the MT got me thinking, and what did happen for a time is that the likes of BDTT, thepnr, K1 and Smallaxe (and me sometimes) did some policing on older threads at the end – largely because of a certain National hating poster. Thing is that even old articles get looked at, and as well as the article visitors might read the first few comments to see what people are saying, skim though, and then go to the end to see the latest buzz. Which is often some spat or troll-fest. So the thing to do I think is either do some off-topic blether with 2 or 3 “police”, or maybe even something to do with the original article, perhaps something that’s happened later. Then the offending post or postings move up the last page and disappear out of view. It used to happen, but doesn’t seem to these days.

      Frustrating time as there’s not a lot anyone can do including the SG and SNP, just watch things happen with Brexit, Dickie Davis and the EU – and Ireland. That’s the main game at the moment, and everything’s hanging on it. Meanwhile we’re mostly picking out the fluff from between our toes.

      Kind of reminds me of this somehow:

    80. Smallaxe says:

      yesindyref2, still watching and I hope it makes those who mess with the ends of threads feel like this;

    81. yesindyref2 says:

      Yes, the last lobbies thread needs a bit of smothering, I think the “discussion” is needed, and am a culprit as such, but not to be left at the end of thread.

    82. Tinto Chiel says:

      Sad, Smallaxe, but he was aspen for it.

      Sorry, I’ll go and thrash myself with birch twigs…..

    83. Tinto Chiel says:

      Do you like my new lungi look? Been working on the pecs this summer too.

    84. Tinto Chiel says:

      Ah, Smallaxe, yer mad, mad ah tell ye…


      Still think I need to work on my smoulder, but.

    85. Tinto Chiel says:

      That’s not how you smoulder. His eyebrows are at the wrong angle and his animal magnetism’s all shot to hell.

      You should see the static I generate with my BriNylon mankini.

      Nufftae light up the Clyde valley.

    86. Smallaxe says:

      BriNylon Mankini, Tinto? if it’s the same one that you wore in 2014, then we’re all in for a real treat! πŸ™‚

      Ahkinharlywate neetherahkin!

      Beautiful Magnificent Scotland

    87. Tinto Chiel says:

      Wonderful stuff. To my shame, I’ve never seen them in the flesh, as it were.

      The Gaels call them the “fir chlis”, the dancing men.

    88. K1 says:

      Tae mine too Tinto, stunning (bookmarked, I’ve just created a file older wi Smallaxe as title….keep ’em coming ma dear)…would love to see them in real time too πŸ™‚

    89. Tinto Chiel says:

      So you’ve opened a Smallaxe file, K1?

      You should just have asked for MI5’s!

      A question for all you deep-thinkers on here:

    90. K1 says:

      MI5 ye say…I’ll just get a copy fae igneous, he seems to have an ample supply of folders on maist o’ us πŸ™‚

    91. yesindyref2 says:

      Bless you my son!

    92. Smallaxe says:

      I saw them down here at Hoddam Castle in 1992, even this far down they were still quite spectacular as there is very little light pollution around that area and it’s extremely quiet, in fact, there is only;

      Nouela: “The Sound of Silence”

    93. Alex Clark says:


      8:27 on MT πŸ™‚

    94. Tinto Chiel says:

      Oh, I see, igneous ROCK.

      I’m slow tonight.

      “Oh, no, there’s two o’ them!” on the M/T.

      Glasgow Empire circa 1967 (Mike and Bernie Winters).

    95. Smallaxe says:

      Tinto, what if God was one of us?

      God’s not up there looking down
      He’s yellow He’s white He’s black He’s Brown
      He is ours and We are His
      He’s All of Us He’s ALL that Is

      Hiv you no’ bib peyin’ attention?

      “Swimming in Your Ocean” Crash test Dummies

    96. K1 says:

      Lol Tinto, ah dare not say it’s name.

    97. Tinto Chiel says:

      At risk of hammers, but I like this madman, Smallaxe:

    98. Smallaxe says:

      Please change igneous for coprolite, I thank you, in advance. πŸ™‚

      Mighty Ions:”Australopithecus and the Coprolites”

    99. Tinto Chiel says:

      K1 and Smallaxe: I’m counting the minutes until we experience A Lithic Manifestation on here.

      Now I’ve got a criminal record…

    100. Tinto Chiel says:

      Ivor was a complete original, wasn’t he?

      Jonathan Watson/Denis Law voice: “He was unique, like so many others.”

    101. Smallaxe says:

      S’pose it depends on your,

      Taste:”If The Day Was Any Longer”

    102. Tinto Chiel says:

      Sadly, I’m not convinced Ivor would have been a Yesser but at least he cut up his tawse when he was a teacher.

    103. Tinto Chiel says:

      Smallaxe: Coughtrie?

      You doin’ a Thepnr?

      I can’t keep up!


    104. Smallaxe says:

      That effin name has polluted my computer for weeks, Good night Tinto;

    105. Alex Clark says:

      Sadly Thepnr has expired I mean retired πŸ™‚ Meantime Sir Humphrey explains the UK’s relationship with the EU.

    106. cearc says:


      I’ve got a stone pestle and mortar if that’s any help.

    107. Smallaxe says:

      My name is Bill and I’m a headcase!

      “I’m a Boy”

    108. Alex Clark says:


      On form tonight I see πŸ™‚ Get this, definitely your era.

    109. Alex Clark says:

      Did you spot who was “playing” the piano?

    110. Smallaxe says:

      Was it Rick Wakeman dressed up as Elton John?

      Rick Wakeman;

    111. Alex Clark says:


      The original name for this song from a Dundee band was Shithouse Door for some reason it got changed to Streethouse Door? I’m sure BrianDoonTheToon will have an explanation.

    112. Smallaxe says:

      Good band, Alex, I think back then the name would have been censored by the Mary Whitehouse brigade or some such nonsense.
      ******************************************************************Try to realize it’s all within yourself no-one else can make you change and to see you’re really only very small, and life flows on “Within and Without you”;

      Goodnight, Alex and All others,

    113. Alex Clark says:

      I know it’s late and don’t expect anybody to watch this at this time. However even if your just out of bed tomorrow then watch it now. I’m guessing you’ll smile πŸ™‚

    114. K1 says:

      I’m amazed at people’s creativity, just think how long dollart took to make that vid Alex…and yes it did bring a smile tae ma coupon.

    115. K1 says:

      Yonks later..

      Hi Smallaxe πŸ™‚

    116. Alex Clark says:


      I’m always astounded at the creativity of people. It really is amazing, you take care my friend.

    117. crazycat says:

      @ Tinto Chiel – yesterday at 7.41 pm

      I’m a bit late with this, but in Shetland the aurora is (are) referred to as da mirrie dancers, which is the same idea as the Gaidhlig.

      I’ve seen them twice from my garden/the road going home (which are not in Shetland, or Caithness). I’ve also signed up to, though unfortunately it’s always been overcast or raining when they’ve sent me an alert.

    118. Tinto Chiel says:

      Morning all, waiting in for the fridge man. It’s going to be a long day.

      So how did the “C” word appear on your computer, Smallaxe?

      I’m on my new bending exercises and organic quinoa regime this morning, supplemented with a roll ‘n’ tattie scone and black pudding.

      A fine vid, Alex. I WAS Horace Wimp until I discovered this:

      Interesting about yon mirrie dancers, crazycat. I’ve no chance of seeing them from Tinto Towers, malheureusement: too much light pollution here but I’ll save yon link, thanks.

      I’ve actually had a stammy-gaster of an experience this morning. Saw a neighbour out for his constitutional, wearing a T-shirt with a saltire and “Scotland” emblazoned just above it. Strange thing is, he was a hard-core NAW and even had posters and stickers to that effect on his house and car.

      Damascene conversion or ProudScotButtery? Must have a wee chat with him. Nice wee fella but he buys the Daily Mail.

    119. Tinto Chiel says:

      cearc: mortal and pestle, is it?

      An excellent suggestion. You never know the minute…


    120. cearc says:

      Well no-one messes with me when I’m grinding the ‘erbs!

    121. Paula Rose says:

      Just popping my head round the door to check that all is well – how’s the Gretna plan coming along, got lots of lovely ladies wanting to come.

    122. Smallaxe says:

      Morning, Tinto, How? I was looking for lights for mine and my daughters’ house @ and now it keeps popping up everywhere, I must have copied and pasted it somewhere but I can’t find where any ideas?

    123. Smallaxe says:

      Hi, Paula Rose, Alex is making all the arrangements for the visit.

      I’m looking forward to seeing you down here where the Mundell Muppets roam. πŸ™‚

      “Booty Swing”

    124. Tinto Chiel says:

      Pert Shop Assistants

      [No.1 in an occasional series]

      I’ve been meaning to share this with you, sophisticates and this is Off Topic after all. Gather round the camp fire…

      Mrs TC and I were in Dunkeld for a wee jolly recently and we went into one of the wee coffee-houses in the main street. As usual, The Home Secretary was dithering in her choice (making a careful and reasoned selection, Ed.) from the proposed bill of fare.

      To pass the time, I cheerfully remarked to the waitress, β€œShe’s not very good at choosing.”

      She then looked me up and down quite slowly and said, β€œAye, I can see that.”

      And me wi’ ma Yes badge tae…..

      Cearc: so that’s why they call you the Highland Sage.

      I’ll get ma filibeg…..

      These matters are deep, Smallaxe, very deep.

      *stares meaningfully into middle distance*

      Let me muse thereon a while.

    125. Tinto Chiel says:

      Wow! She’s a beezer. What charm school did she graduate from?

      I was in the bookshop (not named for reasons which will become obvious) at Boots Corner in Glasgow a few years ago, waiting in the queue, and overheard this:

      “Do you have The Frogs?” (there’s a joke in there somewhere but I shall continue)
      “I’ll see, sir. Who wrote it?”
      “AristoFANNIES.” (I Carmichael you not)
      “AristoFANNIES?” *no reaction:stares at computer screen for a while, then…*
      “Hey, Janice do we have The Frogs by AristoFANNIES?”
      “AristoFANNIES? Aye, it’s in Classical…..”

      AH blame thae teachers, masel’.

    126. Smallaxe says:

      I think Kermit isn’t happy with what is being taught to kids these days, Tinto;

    127. K1 says:


      Ah went aboot fur years when ah wis wee trying to say oesophagus correctly…osayfaygus was as near as ah could manage and then occassionaly i’d get it…

      Another phenomenon was that some objects became aw one word, so right up till ah wis 18 I naturally thought chesturdrawers was just the name of that item. I can still remember the penny dropping instant when that word became three words!

      Funny auld brain intit. πŸ™‚

    128. Smallaxe says:

      Howisitgawn, K1, some o’ they wurds are awfy hard tae say riteannuff, try summotheez;

      Hard intit, πŸ™‚

    129. Smallaxe says:


    130. Valerie says:


      just in case you look here.

      Next Yes Cumbernauld meeting.

      Thursday, 31August, 2017 @ 7.30pm

      Midfield Community Centre.

    131. Valerie says:

      @ Liz G

      It’s Muirfield Community Centre. Damn autocorrect.

    132. Tinto Chiel says:

      True enough.

      I used to think there was a place in Glasgow called Sin Teenochs.

    133. Smallaxe says:

      Tinto, I’ve got a quote from Stanley Baxter awaiting moderation at the moment, soahiv. I hope it’s not going to be Hammers again, my poor napper cannae take it, soitcannae!

    134. Tinto Chiel says:

      Smallaxe, I’ll distract him with my peesie’s wing act, you run for the bushes.

    135. Tinto Chiel says:

      MTS….I’ve got an old Chic Murray joke up my juke, and I’m not afraid to use it.

    136. cearc says:

      Sin Teenochs! Sounds like extra-curricular activity on the golf course.

    137. Smallaxe says:

      I like to hide in bushes and catch a butterfly,

      Tiger Boo;

    138. Tinto Chiel says:

      cearc: this may explain the presence of bunkers on the links.

      Just a theory, mind.

    139. The Proctor Lewis says:

      The rev is unwell so this may cheer him up.

      I went to my allotment and found that there was twice as much soil as there was the week before. The plot thickens..

      I went to a seafood disco last week. I pulled a mussel!

      What’s worse than waking up at a party and finding a penis drawn on your face? Finding out it was traced.

      I told my mum I was going to make a bike out of spaghetti, You should of seen her face when I rode straight pasta.

      I just gave a scientist a book about Helium and he just couldn’t put it down.

      As I got out of my car this morning some guy threw milk, cream and butter all over my car. I thought how dairy!

      So what if I don’t know what Armageddon means? It’s not the end of the world

      I wondered why the Frisbee was getting bigger, and then it hit me.#

    140. Smallaxe says:

      Hi, Michael, good cover,

      John Denver, Glen Campbell, Roger Miller, Johnny Cash are The Six Million Dollar Band;

    141. cearc says:

      One springtime (long, long ago), my daughter, at about 5 yrs. old, wrote for her ‘news’ at school.

      ‘We went for a walk in the woods. There were lots of wooden enemies.’

      The teacher was too thick to realise that she meant wood anemones.

    142. Chick McGregor says:

      Q. What is the smallest number of trees required to make a forest?
      A. A trio.

      Get well soon Rev.

    143. Chick McGregor says:

      OK one more, you know I’m addicted to these things.

      Knock knock!

      Who’s there?


      Ivan who?

      I’ve a new door bell for you.

    144. Smallaxe says:

      Hi, Proctor, πŸ™‚

      I don’t want to brag, but I do speak pig Latin; I mean, I’m not fluent, but I’m sure if I ever went there, I could get by.

      I bought one of those tapes to teach you Spanish in your sleep. During the night, the tape skipped. Now I can only stutter in Spanish.

      When I lost my rifle, the Army charged me Β£85. That’s why in the Navy, the captain goes down with the ship.

      Red sky at night, shepherd’s delight. Blue sky at night, daytime.

      Why do dogs always race to the door when the doorbell rings? It’s hardly ever for them.

    145. Michael McCabe says:

      Afternoon Smallaxe. I Love this lady I think she has a great Voice. reading about her on Wikipedia she has went through a hell of a lot to get to where she is now. Anyway

    146. Chick McGregor says:

      Some Scottish Latin Smallaxe:

      Si ville der dego
      Forte lorez inaro!
      Demsno lorez,
      Demar trux
      Cusan dux.

    147. yesindyref2 says:

      I went for a walk in the bog and realised I must have eaten the wrong mushroom.

      I was going to make a bouquet garni but realised I didn’t have enough time.

      Cows eat a lot of grass which explains why they prefer to be spaced out rather than huddled together.

      My dog’s got no nose. How does he smell? Don’t be daft I said he’s got no nose.

      The cat loves mice but it’s unrequited love.

      I don’t know why I bother and unusually my wife agrees with me.

    148. Smallaxe says:

      Chick, Like it, πŸ™‚


    149. Smallaxe says:

      Tinto, there’s a farmer lives near me and he has so much land that he can afford a field just to keep two crows in.

      True story!

    150. Tinto Chiel says:

      Smallaxe: that farmer had better watch out, or he’ll get rooked.

      I’m thinking, on a serious note, that while the Rev’s not well, we need a bit of self-policing on the M/T. In the past when Stu’s been absent all sorts of Carmichael has occurred so I’m hoping we have non-engagement with The Usual Suspects.

    151. K1 says:

      Thought of that too Tinto the minute I saw his twitter earlier…we’ll all keep a collective eye for any shenanigans, it’ll likely be the usual suspects as it’s already a fairly old thread, the danger is more when we begin to eat oorsel’s, we could just try to keep it lighthearted and let it wander where it may.

      Ah intend to rebut Colin’s devolutionary advances robustly masel’ πŸ™‚

    152. Smallaxe says:

      On it! 😎

    153. K1 says:

      Ya! Yous ur indeed! I just caught up on MT, obsolete souum. πŸ™‚

      *puts oan a netflix filum*

    154. Tinto Chiel says:

      K1: I loved it last night when he kept putting it out there (“Ooh, matron!”) and everyone ignored his witterings. But let it all hang out, if the mood’s on you, cyberwarrior!

      I’m embroidering a sampler for Paula Rose, masel’ πŸ˜› .

    155. Alex Clark says:

      When the cat’s away? I’ll behave, promise πŸ™‚

    156. Smallaxe says:

      And the band played believe it if you like, Alex, πŸ™‚

      Time for a tune?
      The Temptations: “Stay”

      Yield not to Temptations!

    157. Smallaxe says:

      I’m starting to get;

      “That lonely feeling” Dean Ford and the Gaylords: 1965

    158. Cactus says:

      Ahm ready and rarin’ tae go tae Gretna 2U September Smallaxe…

      With all ra amazing o/t Wingers with ye!


      That is all (we need)


    159. Smallaxe says:

      That’s cool Cactus, sub zero in fact, I’m pleased to hear that, looking forward to having you down here in the Deep South.

      Holiday: Nazareth;

    160. Alex Clark says:


      Mind bring your guitar, looks like 9th Sep still working out the fine detail though. Drop me a line at theprn03 [at] gmail [dot] com and I’ll keep you in the loop.

    161. Smallaxe says:

      Acoustic guitar on the premises may need tuning.

    162. Cactus says:

      The guid news.. I’m FREE on the 9th of September ’17.

      The bad news.. n/a n excellent.

      Take that one to heart X.

      Mon down.

      Be free.

    163. Smallaxe says:

      The Ramblers that you spoke about Cactus on M/T;

      “Love Automatic”

    164. Cactus says:

      Mailed ye Alex, sorted.

      Music SA.

    165. cearc says:

      Any plans as to what we might be doing when we get to Gretna?

      I’m already busy darning my best socks for the occasion.

    166. Alex Clark says:


      I’m planning on finishing reading War and Peace, what’s your plans Maria πŸ™‚

    167. Cactus says:

      By ra way, ah’ve gotta crash south of Gretna if need be S’axe n co.

      Love your iScotland off topic.

      Wise ones come here.


    168. Smallaxe says:

      The Soggy Bottom Boys:
      “O Brother, Where Art Thou? – Constant Sorrow”

    169. cearc says:

      That will probably take less time than darning my socks.

    170. Paula Rose says:

      I’ve been for a walk…

    171. Smallaxe says:

      Seen, Cactus, whatever it takes man;

      Quo; “The Wanderer”

    172. Paula Rose says:

      I remember that night *blushes*…

    173. Cactus says:

      Jist landed back in o/t Saxe

      Been listening to muchos “Boston” headphone style.

      “It’s been such a long time..!”

      Ra moon is waning…

    174. Cactus says:

      Wow, see when ye see yer name on the “recent comments…” like that.

      Reminds me when I used ride the motorbike sims in Ra Curlers on Byres Road, West End. Used tae be Jock Tamsons bar upstairs. Wiped the board did I! Unbeaten.

      Mon ra TT!

    175. William Wallace says:

      Sma axe chopping michty trees. Gaid ti see ya back.

      Truth always and rock can get tae fuck πŸ™‚

      signing aff in direct contravention o rule echt.

      Seen as the big man is ill.

      Love yiz ah! Keep up the good work πŸ™‚

    176. William Wallace says:

      Hiv eh tae post it twice Stu πŸ™‚ Yir meant tae be affy no weel. Tak the day aff πŸ™‚

      Sma axe chopping michty trees. Gaid ti see ya back.

      Truth always and rock can get tae fuck πŸ™‚

      signing aff in direct contravention o rule echt.

      Seen as the big man is ill.

      Love yiz ah! Keep up the good work πŸ™‚

    177. Cactus says:

      Wings Over Awesome X.

    178. Smallaxe says:

      Keeping it mellow this morning.

      “Make it easy on yourself”

      “Don’t let the sun catch you crying”

    179. cearc says:

      Freshly plucked mushrooms with eggs for breakfast.

    180. Tinto Chiel says:

      Holy Moaly! With a bluidy mess in here! If Paula R sees this she’ll go mental.

      I see the dreaded upside-down plant pot has made its appearance again on the lounge carpet. And who’s been riding a motor-bike up the stairs?

      Looks like a job for the HD Marigolds and Swarfega.

      Oh, and I think a badger’s been in PR’s smoke-house.

      Smallaxe: saw your ironing reference on the M/T. I usually start with the yoke and sleeves. How about you?

      Mrs TC says my seams are magnificent *blushes*.

      Going out for some fish…..

    181. cearc says:

      I’ve never found sleeves in my eggs…

    182. Smallaxe says:

      Sorry about the mess, O/T was busy last night with Wingers seeking good music and even better company.

      Make sure you get your fish well mongered.

      “Salmonchanted Evening”

    183. cearc says:

      Never iron my eggs either…

    184. Smallaxe says:

      cearc, I don’t blame you. Do not try this at home!

    185. cearc says:

      Well that looks like a really good excuse for not ironing his shirt.

    186. Smallaxe says:

      A bad excuse is better than none, in any language. πŸ™‚

      Eine schlechte Entschuldigung ist besser als keine

    187. Chick McGregor says:

      Midgie was fair bitin’ the day, took a while tae swat.

    188. Smallaxe says:

      Chick, I think that it’s climate change that brings them out biting. The (political) climate seems to be annoying the little Blighty-ers.

    189. Tinto Chiel says:

      Smallaxe, I’m still waiting for your ironing tips.

      Yoke and sleeves first or back and front? Cearc’s been trying to confuse me with her yolks.

      Went to the monger of fish. No witch sole, just lemon. Almost a tenner for two bits!

      God knows what Mrs TC’ll have for her tea. Mebbes some corned beef at the back of the fridge.

    190. Smallaxe says:

      Tinto, I normally iron, right front, left front, back, sleeves and collar. I avoid leaving a line down the sleeves as it makes them look as if they are new and unwashed when in actuality they are freshly laundered.

      Ps, as our friend Michael pointed out, not so long ago, I always take it off first. This method makes me,

    191. Smallaxe says:

      Tinto, please accept my commiserations for your being unable to purchase a lovely portion of Glyptocephalus cynoglossus.

      Promises, Promises;

    192. Tinto Chiel says:

      Whit? You take it off first? Yes, yes, I remember now Michael said something along those lines……

      No wonder I sweat when I iron.

      My favourite JT single, that. I think Ian Anderson had a croft on Skye in the 70s. He was kinda Catweazle-on-Speed, wasn’t he?

      His dentist could have made a fortune.

    193. Smallaxe says:

      Ian Anderson has a fish farm on Skye called Strathaird, he’s a wee tiny guy when you meet him, I think that the camera shots taken back in the day were filmed from below to make him look taller.

      One of my favorites;

    194. Tinto Chiel says:

      Yes, he played that Faure piece really well. I remember a very scary BBC thriller called The Scarf from the early 60s which had this piece of music or something similar. It really scared me ‘cos the victims were strangled and the titles had a swirling scarf while the music played.

      I think the tapes were scrubbed so it seems to be gone but not forgotten.

      I really didn’t like A Passion Play though.

    195. Smallaxe says:

      Tinto, I’m ashamed to admit that when it comes to Gabriel FaurΓ© I’m as;
      “Thick as a Brick”

    196. Tinto Chiel says:

      Sod old Gabriel (not literally, obvs).

      Smallaxe, you’ve almost single-handedly kept this thread going for months. When you’re not well, we tend to go quiet.

      You’re a star: your experience, humanity and internationalism are an inspiration.

      PS: Mrs TC says your ironing tips are “controversial” πŸ˜›

      So that’s you sorted….

      Does anyone else remember “The Scarf”?

      Is no-one out there as old as me?



    197. Smallaxe says:

      Tinto, my dear friend, Thank you, for your very kind and much-appreciated compliment. The truth is, I could not do much without good people like yourself and all the others on O/T inspiring my ramblings and at times showing genuine concern for my health and well-being. I thank you and all of the others and wish you all Peace Love, Happiness and Independence.

      Btw, I think Santa Claus is a day older than you.
      “The Scarf” 1959;

    198. Tinto Chiel says:

      “and Independence” indeed, old fruit. I am convinced my two chielettes will see it, at least. They take no Carmichael from anybody re. The Bright Path.

      Thanks for your reference. Looks like no copies of The Scarf have survived, Smallaxe. It reminds me of the time my wee diddy team beat The Queen’s XI 5-2 in a cup game at Castle Grayskull in 1962 (!): I cite Socrates MacSporran as a material witness.

      The point is: all tapes have been erased/reused. No record now exists. Strangely TQXI records seem unaffected by these external factors. But I’m just a whining grievance-monkey, obvs.

      It’s a funny old game, Saint.

      Chiz, chiz.

    199. Brian Doonthetoon says:

      PART 2.

      Going back to Seabraes.

      In March 2014, me and son went to a YES meeting in the Roseangle Gallery. The only speaker I remember was Peter A. Bell.

      Onnyhoo, we walked back “doon the toon” with Karen Brownlee, who is a keen photographer. We were blethering about various stuffs and when we reached the Seabraes bog, I drew attention to it.

      We went for a recce and found the stairs boarded up but the skylight, made up of glass bricks, had one missing. So I stuck my camera through and took a couple of pics.

      You can see them if you go to the following link and click on the “Seabraes” album.

      As you can see, the premises are “derelict” but it appears to be mostly dirt and neglect. I’m sure I could see brass pipework but couldn’t get a pic. If the walls, floor and fitments have all been sealed up for years, I think it could be possible to renovate to original appearance, in which case, it could be a tourist attraction.

      A turnstile at the top of the stairs and an attendant down below and we could be cooking by gas!

      Edwardian/vintage toilets seem to ‘take a turn’…

    200. Brian Doonthetoon says:


      PART 1 has gone to the waiting room in the ether – which means PART 2 offers no context…

      Such is life…

    201. Ian Brotherhood says:

      @Smallaxe et al –

      A wee poser fur the Weegie literary types amongst ye’s – name the poet who penned ‘Holy Ghostie Men’, and where did that title come from?

    202. Tinto Chiel says:

      Sorry, Ian: je n’ais pas de scoobie.

    203. Smallaxe says:

      Hi, Ian, wis it no thon Tam Leonard thit rote that wan?

      He wis aboot 6year aulder thin me, me an’ him wentae diffrent schuls thi gither.

    204. The Proctor Lewis says:

      Hate never triumphs under our sun.

      This planet is billions of years old, the religions of Judaism Islam and Christ are only a few thousand years old and are unrecognised from what the were a mere few hundred back.
      They will fade into the nothingness whence they came, conjured into a reality to make sense of a world that frightened them in their ignorance.

      But fear not, don’t lose faith in the goodness of man to overcome evil.

      Peace and Love

    205. Smallaxe says:

      Hi, Proctor, you always seem to brighten the day for me when you make one of your all too infrequent visits to O/t.

      I hope you are well and happy my good friend.

    206. Paula Rose says:

      Making tea – anyone want one…

    207. Tinto Chiel says:

      Paula Rose: could I have a Black Russian?

      Sorry about your carpet, but it wisnae me.

      Ian, Smallaxe: saw Tom quite recently in the West End, looking well. I always remember his Special Brew reworking of A.A. Alvarez’s poem about the cold plums in his fridge.

      Can’t find it easily on the web tonight. Paula Rose probs knows too.

      They’re watchin’ me, ah tell ye, watchin’!

    208. Smallaxe says:

      Paula Rose, I’ll Just Have a Cup of Coffee;

      Tinto, thi reasona talk wia BBC accent iz coz yiwidny wahnt mi ti talkaboot thi trooth wiavoice likwanna yooscruff.

      Wot say you, did you perhaps notice the intrusion of my kitten on the main thread. I kid you not, old boy, indy is 7 months old and One can only presume that he has been walking across my negligently unattended keyboard.

      My sincerest apologies if he inconvenienced you in any manner, old fruit.

    209. Ian Brotherhood says:

      @Smallaxe, Tinto et al –

      Aye, Tom Leonard.

      I’ve got a wee battered A4 Xeroxed softback called ‘Holy Ghostie Men’, by ‘Galloping Dog Press’. Found it in a charity shop in West Kilbride yonks ago.

      It’s a treasured thing, but has no value. Betcha Leonard would love to see it though!

      ‘In the name of the father, the son, and the holy ghostie men!’

      So be it!


    210. Tinto Chiel says:

      Smallaxe, Ian.

      You caught me doing Last Call for the night in my stylish wincyette fuchsia PJs with Velcro attachments.

      Have you really been aware of our wee pal so long, Smallaxe? Pare wee sowill, he fair got gralloched ce soir. Son of Insensate Dave?

      Ian: have you any idea where TL stands on Indy? He seems to me to be a bit of a blank.

      A demain, proud seps.

    211. Cactus says:

      “And who’s been riding a motor-bike up the stairs?”

      May have been me in the small oors Tinto Chiel:

      I do do a party piece though.
      See above.

      Ahm ahn animal.

    212. Tinto Chiel says:

      Cactus: nae probs: great vid. Managed to smooth it over with PR, I think. Said it was Ian B on his Vespa. The Laydees just can’t gauge tyre treads, bless ’em.

      And now, into the arms of Morpheus, punters!

    213. Smallaxe says:

      “And now, into the arms of Morpheus, punters!”

      Tinto, careful with that Morpheus, it will make you constipated!

    214. Cactus says:

      Fursday funnies.

      Bloopers – Young Frankenstein (GW):

      Igor is also ahn animal.

    215. Dave McEwan Hill says:

      I’m having my 75th Birthday party in Dunoon Burgh Hall next Wednesday with a rock’n’roll theme. Anybody in the vicinity is very welcome to come (for a fiver -all proceeds to the Forward Shop, Dunoon and the small charity FirstAid4Gambia). I’ll be playing a lot of the rock’n’roll on my two online shows on
      ArgyllIndependentRadio from 7 tomorrow night.

    216. cearc says:

      Dave ,

      A kind invitation. I doubt I will be leaving my garden, a long way from Dunoon but I hope you have a great birthday party and many more.

    217. Smallaxe says:

      Dave McEwan Hill, I hope you have a great Birthday, Dave.I won’t be there but I would like to donate the price for a couple, to your nominated organisations. Paypal?

    218. Cactus says:

      More funny videos furra Friday morn:

      Having fun and laughing is good.

    219. Alex Clark says:

      @Dave McEwan Hill

      Happy birthday when it comes, 75 is a wow. Will try and tune in tomorrow for the show, well done you and the team for keeping it going.

      How’s about a wee dedication to a listener from Arbroath over on the East soast? First song I danced with my wife to when I met her 40 years ago which is kinda hard to believe now πŸ™‚

    220. Alex Clark says:

      coast not soast, butter fingers LOL

    221. Paula Rose says:

      This was big back in the day – size matters…

    222. Alex Clark says:

      @Paula Rose

      Hahaha still brings a big smile to meh coupon πŸ™‚

    223. Alex Clark says:


      I’m guessing the Rev would give a thumbs up to this version of Alice.

    224. Alex Clark says:

      By the way DO NOT WATCH if you of a nervous disposition or in any way suffer from nightmares. You’ve been warned.

    225. Smallaxe says:

      I used to live there in the sixties Alex, go ask Alice;

    226. Alex Clark says:


      Yes it is, just read it and left a mark.

    227. Dumb Unicorn says:

      The BBC has an article today about ‘UK’ salmon boosting food and drink exports. It quotes the total for all UK food and drink exports as Β£10.2bn. The article is very careful not to refer to Scotland except in one of the quotes from the salmon industry rep.

      Interestingly they had an article in March this year which says that Scottish exports of food and drink totalled Β£5.5bn – so does that mean that Scotland contributes more than half of the UK total?

      Too wee, too poor, too stupid πŸ™‚

    228. Tinto Chiel says:

      Morning, Smallaxe.

      Anyone heard from Fred? I want to bore him with my Orange Tips.

      Give us a wave, Fred, if you’re about.

    229. Chick McGregor says:

      Dumb Unicorn

      I am somewhat reluctant to visit the BBC sites.

      However, I did look at this in some detail after indyref1.

      Scotland’s contribution to UK food and drink exports was then, about 1/3. It may have increased proportionately since then.

      Approximating from memory.

      The average annual grocery bill per person, per year, the amount of money required to supply the food and drink they consume, is/was around Β£1k. It may well be a bit more now.

      i.e. about Β£60 billion for the UK

      The UK as a whole, while exporting a lot of its own produce, is a net importer to the tune of about 40% of its food and drink requirement i.e. Β£20+ billion.

      A massive annual bill, dwarfing peak oil revenue, which we all have to ‘pool and share’ in one way or another.

      But note, Scotland’s contribution to food and drink export revenue alone, about Β£5 billion, just about covers the required annual grocery bill for Scotland plus there is a significant extra amount of Scottish produced food and drink consumed in Scotland and exported to England (but not included in the overseas export figure).

      Note, if Scotland became independent, not only would the rUK lose that Β£5 billion from its food and drink trade balance but Scotland’s exports to the rUK would in that situation also count as imports on their balance sheet.

      Although Scotland has 2/3 the area of England, we only have about 1/5th of the arable and good pasture land. But, OTOH, we only have 1/10th of England’s population.
      So overall, agricultural production per head in Scotland is twice+ that in England. The + coming from the fact we have a vastly greate area of rough grazing and hill farming than England (sheep, hill cattle etc.) and considerably more fisheries produce.

      Regarding salmon farming, or aquaculture as it is known, it had already surpassed conventional Scottish fishing in revenue terms. And Scottish landed conventional fishing produce alone accounted for more than half the UK total.
      The very high percentage of UK salmon production seen in Scotland is not due to some act of benevolence on the part of Westminster but is rather a matter of yet another blessing of nature. The numerous sea inlets on Scotland’s West Coast and Islands providing ideal locales. We can never really hope to compete with Norway on that score (I think Slartybartfast must have done the West Coast of Scotland on his day off) but we do have better than most.

      I also looked at other comparative resource statistics.

      For example, electricity production.
      At that time, Scotland produced on average about 26 kWh of electricity per person per day whereas in England it was only about 13 kWh per person per day. Again, about half.

      For timber production.
      Scotland produced the equivalent of a reasonable plank of wood per person per day whereas England produced the equivalent of about a wooden ruler per person per day.

      In all available measures of basic resource to population ratio, Scotland is a viable i.e. self-sufficient country whereas England needs to rely on manufacturing and whatever it can scam in financial services to make up its resource deficiencies.

    230. Tinto Chiel says:

      Excellent post, Chic.

      Unfortunately, this only means the Establishment will try all the harder to hold on to our essential resources, by hook or by crook.

      That 70% gin statistic Robert P mentioned is astonishing.

      “London gin” my erse.

    231. Chick McGregor says:

      We were watching RT when the Turku attack news broke. We have a boy there so we had a bad few minutes trying to get through to him on his mobile, took several attempts.

      He’s OK but phew!

    232. Smallaxe says:

      Realy good news, Chick, it must have been a very worrying time for you and the rest of the family.

      Really pleased to hear that your boy is safe and well and lives in Peace Always.

      It deserves a wee song to celebrate;
      Capital Cities:”Safe And Sound”

    233. Alex Clark says:

      Just started with Wings DJ Dave McEwan Hill broadcasting live from radio Argyle.

      Worth a blast if you like 70’s and 80’s music.

      Very impressed Dave you come across as a really Sensible Dave πŸ™‚

    234. Tinto Chiel says:

      Fancy some exciting sax?

    235. Alex Clark says:

      @Dave McEwan Hill

      Just heard you say on the trannie you bought the Record for the racing.

      Pikarnia in the second race at 14:35 tomorrow at Perth is worth a close look.

    236. Chick McGregor says:

      Thanks smallaxe.

      It was a bit harrowing there for a minute, but only for a few minutes.

      The Christchurch earthquake was much worse for us. Our daughter lives there and we couldn’t get through for hours.

      Her house had to be demolished but she was OK as well.

    237. Ian Brotherhood says:

      @TC –

      Now you mention it, I don’t think I’ve ever heard Tom Leonard express a view on indy, ever. Quite strange really. Mind you, I’d be astonished and mightily disappointed if he wasn’t on our side.

    238. Marie Clark says:

      Happy birthday when it comes Dave McEwan Hill, lang may yer lum reek.

      Away tae bedybyes now, night folks.

      Can I just leave this here.

    239. Dave McEwan Hill says:

      Pikarnia it is, Alex.

    240. Chick McGregor says:

      Aye Tinto

      At the time I did the research I came across the claim that Scotland now (then) produced most of the gin but it wasn’t quantified, although I think I did mention the fact here at the time.

      Ob humour (but classy)

    241. Chick McGregor says:


      “Comes to us all.”

      Vuggsache man! Wir no deid yit.

      Very few get older than 35 inside and those that do usually achieve it at about 16.

      Loved the Janacek but.

    242. K1 says:

      Makes sense, I was about 29 on the inside when I was 16, then when I was 29 on the outside, that was it, nothing has ever been quite as it was from that year onwards. I’m still 29 on the inside, but I’m still hoping for post adult enlightenment.

      *think ahm wishing rather than hoping*

    243. Smallaxe says:

      Ah still don’t know what ah want tae be when ah grow up!

    244. Alex Clark says:

      I used to think that our older folk were all very wise, I also believed that our politicians particularly those that ran the government were the creme de la creme, else how could they have possibly got into these positions.

      I wasn’t so old before I realised my illusions had been shattered.

    245. Paula Rose says:

      All skipping about me cos I’ve never acted my age for decades.

    246. Smallaxe says:

      Mr. McGregor, sir, one of my proofreaders (whom I have since dismissed from my employment,) has deeply embarrassed me to the depth of my very core, so deep is my shame, sir, that my venerated ancestors will also bear this burden with me.

      I would be humbled, sir, if your good self could very kindly allow me to explain the circumstances that have wrought this abominable curse upon my wretched and unworthy being.

      I happened to be idly and I must admit, thoroughly enjoying browsing through the highest amount of unsurpassed academia in our dramatically beautiful and welcoming Kingdom Nation of Scotland, namely the Wings over Scotland off topic commentators with their vast encyclopedic selection of prose poetry and highly entertaining intelligently constructed humour.

      In the midst of these fountains of knowledge, this, the Pierian spring of which I was, of course, drinking very deeply indeed, I was astounded and horrified when my gaze alighted on my own base and tawdry epistle to your most eminent personage, so madly consumed as I was with rage and grief, sir, that I had great difficulty withdrawing from the immediate and spirit consuming dark thoughts of embracing the ancient Hawaiian practice of manewanewa.

      How and ever, lest perchance that you noticed the unspeakable and preposterously committed failure of the said ex-employee to omit one of the necessary two of the letter l from the very first word that I dictated to my p/a, earlier this very evening, sir.

      That word which was so ingloriously and negligently vandalised, sir, was “Really”.

      May I humbly implore you to bestow upon my undeserving and mortally wounded dignity, your forgiveness for what I readily admit, was, in the end, my own damned fault for my failure to adequately scrutinise the curriculum vitae of my prospective employees.

      Please rest assured that this most unseemly perversion of language will be absent from any other correspondence emanating from my own hand or from any other persons or employees to whom I generously allow entrance to my estate, leaving aside the visitors and tourists, paying to view the house and grounds (No photography inside the main house and annexes)

      Please accept this l to repay, in a small way the entirely unintended insult that was wreaked upon you by the aforementioned ex-employee, who, now that I remember, was one of those types of which our society is seeing more of by the bloody day, always whining about wanting equal rights and doing things for themselves, by George Chick! Now I remember what that stupid little pauper was he was one of those…Yessys or is it gnats they’re called.

      I do know that there’s a club or something full of them, the…esenpes or… or…Just forget I wrote this stupid chuffing letter Chick, it’s that Nicola Sturgeons SNP. It’s their fault it’s the bloody SNPs fault…and their daein it Deliberately!

    247. Paula Rose says:

      Smallaxe You can do no wrong in my eyes ever ever ever – we will always love you forever.

    248. Tinto Chiel says:

      Chic: that guy’s got a great voice and I note he and I have the same finely-chiselled features. Sad story behind the Janacek but you probably know that anyway. Glad the family are all well. Frankly, I was ignorant of the events in Finland ‘cos Pravdasound4 was endlessly going its buns about Bruce Forsyth.

      Smallaxe: stay away from that Pierian spring: tap watter’s better, or acqua di robinetta, as it’s known in Auld Cadzow.

      Need some advice: K1 obvs. thinks my pashmina look still has some mileage (“I’ll always seem him in his pashmina” brought a tear to my eye) so ah’m hinkin’ ah may have bucked the zeitgeist with my Nana-induced switch to the Lungi Look for my autumn collection.

      Question is: do I still have the lallies for it?

      Would appreciate your input.

      IanB: you can never be sure, as I know to my cost. Two intelligent (ex-)pals of mine of a literary bent became intractable Noes, adoring the phenomenon that is Muriel Gray. Further social contact became pointless, I’m afeared.

    249. Smallaxe says:

      Tinto, do you have the lallies for it? Where did this unseemly self-doubt come from? Balderdash, man, this lack of confidence in your lallies is completely unfounded and can only be a temporary mental aberration coming from the man who’s strong oak tree-like appendages stunned the red carpet rabble at last years Cannes Film Festival.

      Back then, you stood like a colossus, towering above the envious gazes of those who knew that they themselves could never carry off the brushed velvet heliotrope mankini that you adorned yourself in, with such panache.

      Get a hold on these totally unfounded doubts that you seem to have within yourself this morning, have some brekkers and put a smidgeon of good Scottish London gin into your Earl Grey Yorkshire tea, I’m sure that this will dispell the entirely needless mental torture that you are displaying on this fine North British morning.

      Others are seeking you out to try to find the secret of your illustrious and ethereal beauty;

      Good morning, my friend, hopefully, you will now dispell these uncharacteristic fanciful notions.

    250. Ghillie says:

      Hey there Smallaxe = )

    251. Tinto Chiel says:

      Those words mean a lot to me, Smallaxe. Intellectuals like wot we are can sometimes experience moments of searing self-doubt but you have dispelled my momentary shadows with the Phoebus-like quality of your wurds.

      It was heliotrope AND EAU-DE-NILE. btw. And the brushed velvet was something of a mistake in that heat but I think I really stunned The Laydees, bless ’em.

      Motto for the day: Got it? Flaunt it!

      Fanx for everything.

    252. Smallaxe says:

      Hi, Ghillie, good morning, still fighting the good fight, I see.

    253. Tinto Chiel says:

      MTS: this my favourite peom about Lallies:

    254. Smallaxe says:

      Tinto, you, of all people, are most welcome, my dear boy, I can understand why on occasion we mere uber mortals can have our passing moments of doubt, I myself admit to having the same ridiculous moments of uncertainty on occasion.

      I soon cured myself by remaining pissed as the proverbial newt for this past decade or so. We fashionistas do sometimes have our doubts about the golden path that we follow.

    255. Tinto Chiel says:

      Amen to that, mon vieux.

      Still weeding out my faves, and came across this tortured genius. Yo don’t really need to understand Dutch to follow the gist. Bet that there Ian B kens a’ aboot him.

      Not for the faint-hearted, so be warned.

    256. Smallaxe says:

      The flatlanders don’t scare me in the slightest, Tinto, one of my daughters has had one of those fingerinthedykers as a partner for yonks, so no worries in that respect.

      Jules Holland and Ruby Turner: “Peace in the Valley”

      Feel free to join in the fun!

    257. Ghillie says:

      Smallaxe = )

    258. Smallaxe says:

      My name is Ozymandias, King of Kings?

      I’n’I is afraid dat dis statement cyaa be true, Tinto. Wi all kno dat Ras Tafari be king of kings an conquering lion of di tribe of Judah.
      Bob, im seh;

    259. Chick McGregor says:

      Realy enjoyed your elaborate errata. (And soooo glad I didnae point oot yer typo afore ye postit. πŸ™‚ )

    260. Smallaxe says:

      Tinto, just in case my absence worries you, I’m going round to give my grandson a bike as it’s his birthday on Monday and he will be back at school. toodle pip dear friend, laters.


    261. Tinto Chiel says:

      Nae probs, Smallaxe. I’m appreciating Nazareth the more I re-hear them.

      While you’re away, I’ll ponder why a guy from Brisbane ended up being immortalised in the Sinai desert.


    262. Tinto Chiel says:

      Just before I go, a song for Paula Rose which came into my mind yesterday for some reason.

    263. cearc says:


      Nae need to fret. The joy of a pashmina is that you can wear it with anything, pj’s, onesies, sparking bri-nylon mankinis etc. etc.

    264. cearc says:


      Love your per person per day calculations. So easily understandable to anyone (rather than big numbers) and who could forget the plank/ruler comparison?

      Fermi would be proud.

    265. K1 says:

      Just in from being oot. I think you’ve had ample and quite honestly terribly frank advice on your lallies issue dear man, your doubts as pointed oot were tae nae avail, handsome is as handsome does, and as cearc so pointedly reminds us a pashmina is for aw and any occasion, and can show aff a man wi such beautifully sculptured lallies such as yours in the best possible manner. A man of your elegance hus not a jot tae fear when deciding whit tae wear. Gaun yersel’ as they say…doon the Byres Road. πŸ˜‰

    266. Tinto Chiel says:

      K1, cearc: many thanks, chinas, for your kind thoughts and fashion tips. Your aesthetic support at this difficult time means a lot to me.

      Might go for a fuchsia-inspired cruise down Byre Road tonight to The Curlers but since Cactus drove his Harley through the public bar it’s not quite what it was, I’ve heard.

      A braw lad he is, if a wee tate impetuous. His taste in hats is sublime, btw.

    267. K1 says:

      Fancy a Scottish robot dug?

      Whit aboot gien an apprenticeship tae a Scottish robot?

    268. Ian Brotherhood says:

      @Alex C –

      Saw yer tip was pipped by a 20/1 shot.


    269. Tinto Chiel says:

      Hey, Ian: do you have a printable view on Crumb, given your GSA background?

      As one contributor said, his cross-hatching is pretty cool.

      I loved the reverse sequence @ 37′ from Modern Urban Grim to Arcadia. Every time I walk through Brigton and The Calton (“Hazel Wood” in Gaelic), this sequence comes into my head.

      First saw it on The State Propagandist a long time ago but enjoyed it on YT recently.

    270. Smallaxe says:

      Hi, Ian, narrated in American English, this 4min 20s long film shows… Ach jist watch it, anybody can watch it, it reminds me of what we already know, it’s good to reinforce that, now and again.

      The 4th Monkey “Levez Vous” 2014

      I’ll try to find something cheerier to listen to in the meantime.

    271. Smallaxe says:

      Tinto Chiel says:

      “Hey, Ian: do you have a printable view on Crumb, given your GSA background?”

      I’ve been a big fan of Crumb for years now Tinto if I can help just let me know, I’ve got every album that he’s ever made and his greatest hits album also. All on vinyl!

      Your welcome, πŸ™‚

    272. Tinto Chiel says:

      Smallaxe: MTS I hope your wee one enjoys his first day at school.

      They’re unrecognisable from our day and the young teachers are much more understanding and supportive.

      That’s all I’ve got: no cynicism on this particular subject.

    273. Smallaxe says:

      Tinto, thank you, my friend, I’m sorry that I clumsily only gave the bare details. My grandson will be 9yrs old on Monday which is the day that the schools go back after the summer holiday, so we gave him his presents early to give him a chance to enjoy them before he goes back. Thanks again, for your very kind thoughts.

      No cynicism from me either, Tinto, he goes to a great local school here, staffed by some very good and enthusiastic teachers, and he has always had excellent reports.

      Proud grandpa, soanamur! πŸ™‚

    274. Smallaxe says:

      A wee London band, not too pleased about a few things


      Not too happy about a few things myself, tbh.

    275. Tinto Chiel says:

      My younger one is a primary teacher, Smallaxe, in a very deprived school.

      The stories she tells me the poverty she encounters in her working day is pretty heart-breaking, given the wealth of the Good Ol’ UK, most of which is artfully directed to the 1%, most of the time.

      The SG is fighting back on pocket-money but so many good people are involved in education now that there is hope.

      I just hope Honest John Swinney listens to the right people in his reforms, and not just The Inspectorate and the SQA (pass the garlic, righteous ones).

      Christ! Perilously close to On Topic!

      Hey, Smallaxe, what’s your favourite colour?

      And don’t say fuchsia, FFS!

    276. cearc says:


      Fashion tips are me. I learnt everything about fashion from oor Paula Rose, the expert extraordinaire.

    277. Tinto Chiel says:

      cearc: thanks very much for that but I’m afraid PR hasn’t spoken since I describes her vollyvongs as “soggy”.

      If only I could take back time…..

      One wee mistake, one wee mistake, goddammit!

    278. Smallaxe says:

      My favourite colour, Tinto? Like music genres, I have many favourite colours and without a doubt, many of them are the colours that I see around me in Scotland.

      I mean that, even the colours of our wildlife blend to the landscape. Highland cattle, foxes, stoats weasels red squirrels and the Monarch of the Glen fully adorned with his crown held high in the gloaming. I was once privileged to come face to face with a wildcat in a small piece of woodland now sadly cleared to allow for the M8, he/she was magnificent, we exchanged a long glance at each other before he/she silently slipped back into cover.

      I could go on, Tinto, but I’m sure that you know what I mean and you’re probably sorry you asked. πŸ™‚

      Other;”Colours” that I love;

    279. Tinto Chiel says:

      Capisco, Smallaxe.

      “The drunkenness of things being various.”

      That Donovan track was one of his best, although I play Jennifer Juniper to my younger one just to annoy her.

      Maybe she’ll get it when I’m gone.

    280. Alex Clark says:

      @Ian Brotherhood

      Aye Ian, not just a 20/1 shot but a 10 year old horse having it’s 45th race and had never previously won in it’s life. Ach well, sorry DMH if you backed it.

    281. Dave McEwan Hill says:

      I did, but not to worry. Very small stake. I actually back horses generally at 11/2 or above because, after a lifetime of backing horses (and working W Hills as a relief settler for several years in the old days when settlers had to be able to count),I have realised if you are gambling the only important thing is the price. I actually introduced bookmaking to Nigerian racecourses when I was on the board of the five racecourses in the North of the country.I’ll probably go to hell.
      Anyway I backed a 25/1 winner today – it was 6/1 in the papers.

      I came onto off topic to talk about something else.

    282. Dave McEwan Hill says:

      What I wanted to say was that I was advertising our online radio to indicate it is a huge potential for contacting support, giving out information and having debates.

      It is easy and it is cheep and it can be heard all round the world. In recent times I have had people in Nigeria and Italy listening to me not to mention all over the UK as long as they are on broadband or have a smart phone. Our licenses and streaming cost us less than Β£400 per annum and this allows us to stream to 9,999 listeners. You do need to have access to broadband. Pay more get more streaming is the rule.

      The local Oxfam here talks to all its members and plays their requests and so on. Argyll Independent Radio is not part of our YES organisation (we rent a part of our premises)but the local YES organisation and local SNP branches are planning to start hiring a weekly hour to start doing a weekly round up with invited guests etc.

    283. twathater says:

      Hi guys I’m new here on o/t usually just lurking and liking the banter , I’m here to ask advice from the body of the kirk, i have been looking at various VPN’s and the more i look the more confused i become ( it’s daen ma heed in ) lots of sites recommend IP vanish does anyone use them and does it give the protection it advertises , also is it easy to use, and it seems quite competitive price wise , any advice would be gratefully received thanks back to lurking

    284. Chick McGregor says:

      ‘I’ use Cactus VPN. Apostrophes because it was my son-in-law who chose and set it up for me. He is an IT professional at quite a high level.

      TBH I am not entirely sure what it does or protects me from but apart from occasional requests to ‘validate’ my address, usually from BBC sites (although I only go there when I must) it is pretty much transparent.

    285. Chick McGregor says:

      PS I asked him about security after I discovered someone with a Cumbernauld registered IP address was regularly logging on to my machine. I’ve only been to Cumbernauld once when visiting a friend who only stayed there a short while.

      It seemed to help get rid of the intruder, but hard to say as I also tried various virus and malware removers and did a fresh Windows install.

    286. Brian Doonthetoon says:

      Hi twathater.

      I have installed and occasionally use “Hotspot Shield”.

      Coz it’s free. It only offers you the appearance of being in the USA but it is free.

      One drawback – I have my email app set to download new emails every 5 minutes so, if it tries to download while I’m connected through the VPN, I get a warning from Plusnet, because they doesn’t recognise the address. The two times I have used the VPN recently, Plusnet has told me that a machine in California and then in Oregon was trying to connect to my account.

      You just accept that it is YOU, then emails download as usual.

      Worth trying for free. You could then always pay for one that gives you multiple choices for location.

    287. Brian Doonthetoon says:

      doesn’t = don’t.


    288. Paula Rose says:

      It all happened tonight…

    289. twathater says:

      Hi Chick & BDTT thank you both for your info, it’s just so hard to get info on these things , I start investigating then end up tying myself in knots , as for the adverts and tech side they can promise anything again cheers

    290. Tinto Chiel says:

      Dear Mr BDDT.

      Some time ago you sought elucidation regarding a demotic term I had employed O/T, namely “teaker” (a DL expression meaning “something splendiferous, worthy of approval, etc.”).

      I note your recent use of “shazbat”. Could you explain its meaning?


    291. cearc says:

      Shazbat originated in the Ottoman empire. It is, of course a type of bat used to play shaz.

      A once popular game across the empire which disappeared (as did lots of people) during the division and partition imposed by the ‘western allies’.

      As the ‘new’ countries no longer had the diversity of peoples it was no longer possible to assemble the diverse, multi-ethnic teams that were the basis of this fine game.

    292. Brian Doonthetoon says:

      Hi Tinto Chiel.

      After much searching on tinterweb, it seems that I have been spelling in wrongly for years. Apparently it should be “shazbot”.

      It was the expletive used by Mork in “Mork and Mindy”, much as we would exclaim “curses!”, or flip, or jings or [insert your own here].

    293. Chick McGregor says:

      Having been in NZ for the whole of July with no internet access, the tablet I brought wouldn’t access Wings from there, I am only just beginning to realize some of what has been going on.

      The Common Space attack, even for one well acquainted with the narcissism of those who aspire to lead on the left, left me shocked.

      I suppose I’d better say no more, since it is possible this may be connected to Stu’s reduced output and he has posted asking people not to speculate on that, but just felt I had to let off that little bit of steam.

      No response please.

    294. Tinto Chiel says:

      cearc and BDTT: thank you for your erudite and persuasive responses.

      Since they are somewhat at variance, I have decided to take them to Avizandum.

      And if he’s out, I don’t know what to do.

    295. Smallaxe says:

      Tinto, sorry for my vanishing trick on Saturday but I went into the twilight zone after my grandsons 9th birthday rave and have been sleeping since.

      I woke up this morning, (sounds like a blues tune,dintit?) take your time considering the meaning of Brians word shaz..t I think it has several meanings, anyway time is on your side. πŸ™‚

    296. Tinto Chiel says:

      I suspected as much, old fruit. I had an image of you, face down in a pool of Irn-Bru, surrounded by Victoria sponge birthday cake and hunners’n’thoosand sprinkles.

      “Oh, Smallaxe, what a falling-off was there… (poetry).

    297. Smallaxe says:

      Aye, Tinto that incestuous, that adulterate beast felled me over the weekend but luckily I had my light fawn suit on, so no harm was done.

    298. K1 says:

      Hi Smallaxe πŸ™‚

    299. Smallaxe says:

      Hi, K1, I’ve not had a look at the threads yet to see what you and the rest of the reprobates have been up to. I hope I don’t hear this;

    300. Smallaxe says:

      fillossfay and handy household tips!

      Life is circular and so too is a roll of sellotape. Always let the tape stick back onto itself, by doing this, you will enjoy searching for the lost end, this will make you appreciate that life is always circular.


    301. Smallaxe says:

      Typo: Fillosoffay!! ah ment. Stupit soaum

    302. Tinto Chiel says:

      “Oh what a falling-off was there! (Part Two)”

      Confession: Tinto takes the train.

      Don’t tell Nana, please.

    303. Smallaxe says:

      I’ll say nothing, Tinto if you do the same.

      A big boy done it and ran away!

    304. Tinto Chiel says:

      It’s a deal!

    305. Fred says:

      Greetings Manky Mates! second attempt at this!

      Natalie Merchant, Bully Bragg & Michael Stipe on Glesga Green.

      Ben Oovi under watter.

    306. Fred says:

      Online dating? hmmmm try again, should of course be Billy Bragg!

    307. Paula Rose says:

      Who brought in the widescreen telly – it’s blocking the paintings, remove at once.

    308. Alex Clark says:


      Don’t know how you managed to do that as it’s not been possible to embed Youtube videos for a long time, you could embed Vimeo ones but yours is definitely Youtube LOL.

      Nice to have you back.

    309. Paula Rose says:

      Covered up that lovely portrait of you *won’t bother dusting that again*

    310. William Wallace says:

      Eh dinnae ken whether to start being serious and posting a wee bit mair insightful and thought provoking material or continue being a drunken eejit.

      I quite enjoy being the latter because it comes withoot responsibility or expectation and to be honest it can be a rare laugh (even if it’s only me that finds it funny). πŸ™‚

      What ti dae, Help iz oot wingers. Serious or stoopid?

    311. Smallaxe says:

      Fred, say a big boy done it and ran away.

      do we need a telly licence noo?

      Ah didnae laugh, ah jist screamed til ah wis incontinent.

    312. Smallaxe says:

      William Wallace, whatever takes your fancy Wull, whatever floats your boat, it’s all cool;

      “Whatever it Takes”

    313. Alex Clark says:

      @William Wallace

      Serious and insightful is good, I try to do that. A drunken eejit
      is good and done that many times.

      The truth is that I know who I am and that I can be both serious and an eejit in the same night! But the folk on Wings know that and I’m usually forgiven for being an eejit, in particular by those that have met me. It’s me that worries and has to shrug it off LOL.

      De yeh want meh advice? Just be yourself always πŸ™‚

    314. William Wallace says:

      @ Sma Axe

      Eh dinnae feel like ehm pittin a proper shift in.

      Eh could contribute a bit mair and level up but iz wiv seen, it can get ye arrested and intae mair bather than a man that’s raising hiz femily can be arsed wi the now.

      At the same time, eh feel like ehm no dain enough fir the cause because ehm too busy acting the goat.

      But o a dilemma.

      Enjoy being under the radar but eh wanta start a fkin riot.

    315. William Wallace says:

      @ Alex

      loud and clear mate

    316. Alex Clark says:

      @William Wallace

      That was a serious post no matter how you look at it. What I hear is your passion and maybe a bit of anger. Well we’ve all got that Wullie and feel exactly as you do.

      Got to bide our time for now, who knows which way the wind will blow tomorrow, every good card player knows when to go all in eh!

    317. Smallaxe says:

      You look after your family Wull, we are all doing what we can in our own way, with our own methods.

      I know exactly how you feel (I’ll show the scars one day) we’ll take it as it comes and we’ll deal with it and if that means manning the barracades, I’ll be right by your side and so will many others, in the meantime, peace always!

      How it used to be done!

      and it worked.

    318. William Wallace says:

      Aye alex.

      As the diamond said

      Know when to hold em
      Know when to fold em
      Know when to walk away
      Know when to run


      Meh problem is Eh am “in the mood fir dancing”.

    319. Alex Clark says:


      Great tune over on MT, love it.

    320. William Wallace says:

      @ sma axe

      Meh wife and son understand that I might hiv tae stand up. They ken what this means tae me. They are supportive o it.

      Ehm constantly togglin wi indy an family. It’s no because o them but because o me. Aywiz trehin ti dae the right thing.

      Ehm sitting here wi a match and a but o blue touch paper on one side and ah the people eh care maist aboot on the other.

      Strike or submit? It’s a big question fir me. Once eh mak the leap there is nae going back.

      It’s ah or nuthin.

      What do eh dae?

    321. Smallaxe says:

      Thanks, Alex, I thought it was on topic and appropriate.

    322. Smallaxe says:

      You look after your family! no if’s no but’s.

      If the time ever gets that desperate, we’ll ALL be there wull. Now is Not the Time! (to quote a pig in knickers in London)

      “One Love”

    323. William Wallace says:

      As an old friend of Haz Manor πŸ˜‰

      Movement of Jah people πŸ™‚

    324. Smallaxe says:

      We don’t want to be acting as if we’re in something like a gangstas paradise;

      “Something “like” a Gangsta’s Paradise”

      Cheer up Wull, it wis an awfy day the night the lum fell in

    325. Alex Clark says:

      @William Wallace

      It’s ah or nuthin.

      We’re no there yet, we can’t let our impatience fuck up all the progress made so far. It took me nearly 40 years for me to support Independence because of the brainwashing, I knew no better.

      Depite that between 2012 and 2014 support for Independence went from 25% to 45%. So we got something right, we need to convince people. We have to win the people over, these are our people mind. That’s what we must still focus on, Northern Ireland didn’t become a part of the Republic despite 20 years of agony and conflict.

      I’m having none of that in this country, our voices need to be raised and be heard because only by saying what you want will you convince others. What we have to overcome is not an army but a propaganda ridden media.

      A campaign against the TV license would be a good start, boycott of the newspapers, all this has value. Scotland will win it’s Independence by defeating the media and US, people like you and I encouraging those closest to us that it is in their best interests, not with force, never. It’s as simple as that.

    326. Alex Clark says:

      @William Wallace

      We neither strike or submit, we fight with our gubs as that is the only effective weapon we have..

    327. Smallaxe says:

      Well said, Alex. I bid you all goodnight.

      “Things We Said Today”

    328. William Wallace says:

      Sorry guys but

      This is not the first riot I’ve tried to start and for the most positive of reasons.

      I’m the middle parting guy straight out the eighties in the previous video.

      What shall we be and what would we like to be?

      I am gonna start a riot instead. πŸ˜‰

      I’m just a fool anyway, naebody cares what Eh hae ti say onyway. πŸ˜‰

    329. William Wallace says:

      @ pnr

      Nae chance.

      Ehm gonna kick aff.

      You can wait and wait and wait.

      Or you can change it.

    330. Fred says:

      Nae idea how the Big Picture happened, it jist happened. Not the Glesga Green by the way, it’s the bandstand on the Clyde at the suspension bridge, a John Pryne number I think!

      Must dash, a funeral. Death can be fatal! Where’s that Daldowie coat?

    331. William Wallace says:

      Disclaimer: Eh dinnae mean an actual riot wi “burning and looting” afore somebody takes athin oot o context. πŸ˜‰

    332. Alex Clark says:

      @William Wallace

      Morning Wullie I think I’ll away oot and get…a haircut this morning πŸ™‚ Have a good day all.

    333. William Wallace says:

      On reflection “Agitate for change” in a peaceful but boisterous way through direct action might have been a better choice of words. I would never advocate for anything other than a peaceful approach to social change.

      Thought I should make that clear.

    334. William Wallace says:

      Morning Alex.

      Was eftir reading your last paragraph back through eh thought a disclaimer might be required here. πŸ™‚

    335. William Wallace says:

      @ Alex

      The middle parting wasnae the worst o it. I grew it lang and had it in a ponytail at one time. Eh cringe looking back through some auld photos.

    336. Tinto Chiel says:

      Chic @2.41 yesterday: now that we know the real reason for recent events, I feel free to agree with your comments regarding CS and the Right-On Left in general. I was so angry I stopped commenting in case I said something I would regret.

      And yet today, one of the Usual Suspects and National columnist manages to drag Scotland into the Trump/Charlottesville debacle. It’s a good thing to remind us of Scotland’s shameful connection with the slave trade but I note she fails to balance this with one of Scots Law’s most inspiring judgments, namely in the Joseph Knight case, when slavery was simply not recognised in Scotland. It’s all the more amazing when you consider how harshly the Scottish judges treated Thomas Muir and his associates for desiring “just a little” democracy.

      I have to ask: what was the point of this article? How does it hasten the journey to independence? How will it persuade undecideds to vote Yes?

      Self-indulgence seems to be the main trait of the coffee-house Left. They should try canvassing in the schemes next time and do something useful.

      Off to crush a grape and apologies in advance.

    337. Smallaxe says:

      William Wallace: Good morning, Wull.

      I had dreadlocks until I turned 50, so don’t worry about your hair. Are you down with that Luton Crew right enough? Askin’ for a friend.

    338. Smallaxe says:

      I think that I may have inadvertently posted a youtube link without first removing the https// prefix.

      My sincere apologies.

    339. Smallaxe says:

      Fillosoffay; For alert readers. (without a link)

      Remaining Alert!

      Find a broken mug and glue the handle back on. Now, whenever you drink coffee/tea from this mug you will be on Full Alert!

      I’m going to have to start using this method when posting links.

    340. The Proctor Lewis says:

      One for you Stuart

    341. Smallaxe says:

      Hi, Proctor; still up to your old tricks, I notice.

      “Your Honour” Pluto Shervington;

    342. Alex Clark says:

      @William Wallace

      I’ve played this a couple of times on Off Topic but not sure if you might have ever saw it. This time it’s for you.

    343. William Wallace says:

      @ Sma Axe (belated good morning)

      I spent a fair part of my teens/early twenties back and forward at Haz. It was a great place and I learned a lot from the people there.

      Some of us went on to form similar projects and sound-systems over the years that followed with varying degrees of success. Nothing quite on the same level as the original collective though.

      I stopped putting on events around the time my son was born. I’d had enough by that time anyway as things were changing and straying too far from the original ethos.

      Don’t regret any of it but, glad I got out when I did.

    344. Smallaxe says:

      William Wallace: Good afternoon Wull, (it’s nearly tomorrow) πŸ™‚

      I worked for a time with Ron Bailey and Jim Radford back in the day with the Family Squatting Movement, the Luton crew that I was aware of was involved in the same kind of thing. Were you into that movement?


    345. William Wallace says:

      @ Sma Axe

      As someone who experienced homelessness in my teens (which led me to HAZ in the first place), I ended up volunteering and working within the sector. I still do some volunteering to this day in a project for homeless people with mental health problems and drink/drug related homelessness.

      Did a bit of volunteering and table manning at events for ASS many years ago and did a fair bit of squatting myself back in the day. Used to perform at quite a lot of lefty type events too in various squats around the UK for groups like RTS etc.

      Was fairly involved in different direct action movements over the years but, wouldn’t want to say which ones exactly for obvious reasons (that’s a chat for round the fire) :).

      It’s a side of my life that has largely been on hold as I get on with the business of fatherhood. Won’t be long until the young lad is done with school and hopefully off to university and I might be able to get back into things a bit more again.

    346. Alex Clark says:


      I loved Paul Simon’s music and this one is another that I loved. Think I told you previously that I believed we were cut from the same cloth? Now I have no doubt.

    347. Fred says:

      Big Ben! It’s a fucking clock!

    348. Tinto Chiel says:

      Hi, Chic.

      Now that we know why things went wonky on Wings, I feel free to comment on CS and the Right-On Left (not to be confused with the Real Left) following your post of 2.41 yesterday. I got so fed-up with that shitstorm that I stopped posting for a week or so (no unseemly cheers at the back, please) in case I said something actionable.

      I see possibly the most windswept and winsome of the Cool Left has an article in today’s National in which she drags Scotland into the Trump/Charlotteville debacle and reminds us of Scotland’s role in Caribbean slavery. Fair enough if you want to rake over the coals of a shameful episode none of us today would condone, none of us were responsible for, and none of us have profited from, but why not introduce some balance by mentioning Scots law’s judgment on the Joseph Knight case?

      At a time when the Scottish legal establishment moved swiftly to crush Thomas Muir’s attempt to establish free speech and political liberty, it is quite remarkable they refused to recognise slavery, and rejected Wedderburn’s appeal too. This effectively made Joseph Knight, a Caribbean slave, a free man in Scotland.

      My question is: what was the point of this article? Would it further the Yes campaign? Would it persuade No voters to vote yes in Indyref2? Or does it actually play into the You Scots are Actually Pretty Shite and Racist narrative we are so familiar with?

      Next week: β€œThe Scottish roots of the KKK” (give us your cribs, Neil).

      I should point out I got my political education largely from Communist colleagues with whom I argued with vehemently at times (not least about Scotland’s dire condition), but whose commitment and intellectual rigour I respected. They devoted their lives to their vision of a better society and suffered for it in their careers, too.

    349. yesindyref2 says:

      And with the pinned tweet at the top, that’s the game and bogey.

      Did I ever tell you in the wild old days of UseNet I was approached by Pinkertons offereing me a job? That and a different invitation to a dark hangar at Northolt for some odd reason is why I posted thereafterwards as something at

      Often wondered what that was about, all the same.

    350. Tinto Chiel says:

      Yesindyref2: re the Pink Panther and his groovy motion……

      Mrs TC said, “And do you have a little list?”

      “No,” I replied, “it’s just the way I walk.”

      I’ll just go now…..

    351. Smallaxe says:

      William Wallace; Seen!

      I’n’I tink wi ave walk di same path mi bredren nuh suh lang ago.

      Ziggy Marley And The Melody Makers:”Tomorrow People”

    352. Smallaxe says:

      Alex did we not agree that we were cut from the same cloth/Tartan!

      Boom Boom Clap: That’s my title for this song!

    353. Alex Clark says:


      Never saw that one before. Freddie was something else though was he not? Pure class.

    354. Smallaxe says:

      Tinto, Worth a look.

      Dear Mr Mullen,

      I read that you are publishing a book on Slavery and wonder if you will be mentioning the Jacobites transported as slaves to the West Indies. They inter-married with the Africans. However, I doubt if you have any knowledge of these facts as Scottish History is not taught in Scottish schools and Scotch Historians only copy Anglo-Centric [expletive removed] from Unionist Historians. I do not think any of the above would own plantations in the West Indies but no doubt many of them would have [expletive removed] the African women working with them. Yours sincerely, [illegible signature].

    355. Smallaxe says:

      Freddie was a sad loss to us and to music, Alex. I wonder who we’ll lose next, at least if there is an afterlife the music will be excellent.

      Who Wants To Live Forever?

    356. yesindyref2 says:

      I’m with the import of the letter, not the article.

    357. Tinto Chiel says:

      Thanks, Smallaxe.

      I came across this some time ago and was very sceptical about Mr Mullen’s position.

      I’ll await his being Pittocked, I think, or at least until I can examine the records myself.

      Question everything, mon vieux.

    358. Smallaxe says:

      yesinyref2, They just love me! and I’ll love them “back” someday;

    359. Alex Clark says:

      Just saw the post on the MT from IB and decided to read again from the beginning LOL. Now here’s the kicker read from the beginning while listening to the song Smallaxe posted on the same thread.

      If your like me you’ll get goose pimples while reading πŸ™‚

    360. Smallaxe says:

      Nas & Damian Marley;
      It’s crazy when you feed people the truth you don’t know how they’re gonna react
      You’re scared of wrong doers, people that just ignorant
      You’re scared of the truth, be patient for now!

      One Love!
      If needed.

    361. Alex Clark says:


      Sorry my man none of they two tunes tickled my boat lol. Each to their own eh.

    362. yesindyref2 says:

      Oh well

      though I prefer this one, a driving song

      Play it loud with the windows open and wake up the lorry drivers!

    363. Cactus says:

      πŸ˜‰ !

    364. Alex Clark says:

      A message for us all that you cannot ignore!

    365. yesindyref2 says:

      On the motorway of course, during the night.

    366. Smallaxe says:

      Nobody likes every song, Alex, but that’s allowed on O/T. There’s a lot of lot of songs that I haven’t liked in;

      “My Life” Billy Joel;

      “We didn’t start the Fire”

    367. Alex Clark says:


      You surprised me there but my era and liked it.

    368. yesindyref2 says:

      Oh well then, here’s one I met my wife to at a party

      It was my new album, my party and she never left, ‘cept to get her things.

      I think there were other guests, can’t really remember.

    369. Alex Clark says:

      Supporters of Independence will hate me for this one, who cares I liked the song at the time and to be honest it’s a parody of British Nationalism LOL.

    370. Smallaxe says:

      Alex, that must have been a;

      “House of Fun”

      I first heard this while I was leaving for a train and my girlfriend asked;

      I’ll tell you the rest of that story when I’m sure that you’ve forgotten the first part. πŸ˜‰

    371. Alex Clark says:


      Can’t keep up, watched your two Billy Joel ones all the way through. Yes brilliant, had to have a comeback and Tenpole Tudor was it LOL.

      Now you are hitting me with more! Will I ever get to bed?

      YES eventually hahhaha.

    372. Alex Clark says:


      I know the song from Ellison, I can wait and would like to hear the story. We’re never alone when we have Wings eh!

    373. Big Phil says:

      cheers Smallaxe. peace always buddy. πŸ˜‰

    374. Smallaxe says:

      Peace Always to you Phil. Goodnight, my friends.

      It’s been another;
      Perfect Day

    375. Alex Clark says:

      Think I’ll stick a song on the MT just to wind them up LOL.

    376. Paula Rose says:

      OMG what have I done on the MT!

    377. Cactus says:


      Jist wanted tae say…

      Awe ra best tae yer good lady, yer boy, an yerself, William Wallace πŸ™‚

      Cheers Scotland.


    378. Big Phil says:

      Cannae take her anywhere. tut tut tut. lol πŸ˜‰

    379. William Wallace says:

      @ Alex 3:42pm

      One the subject of street artists and homelessness, here is one from some lads I met a couple of year ago called Phat Bollard with a song called “Millionaire”.

      This one by Phat Bollard is for Stu (Hope it cheers you up)

      When life gets you down – Busking in Bath 24/04/2015

      @ Cactus 1:30am

      Richt back at ya and ah the best to you and yours.

      PLUR tae ah the wingers on off topic.

    380. Tinto Chiel says:

      Loved your Miss Ellison in particular, Smallaxe.

      I woke up this morning with this tune in my head, although I can’t ever remember listening to it.

      Think I’m getting my autumn melancholy in early. Going to whip out my Keats.

    381. Smallaxe says:

      Tinto, your mention of autumn brought this thought to me.

      Add an autumnal hue to your home by putting apple cores down the sides of your armchairs or sofa and leave them to mature, this will give you the fragrance of autumn all year round.

      The Kinks: “Autumn Almanac”

    382. Tinto Chiel says:

      Ah, the sublime Kinks. Ray was a poet, sure’n’he was.

      Thanks for your innovative ID styling suggestion, Smallaxe, but I’m more of a hedgehog man myself.

      Going out for some fish, although if it’s anything like last week I’ll need my MasterCard.

    383. Smallaxe says:

      A MasterCard, just for a bit of fish, Tinto, why don’t you invest in a fishing rod and enjoy the innocent pleasures of some sea fishing. There’s nothing to be afraid of when catching your own.
      Buy a boat, Buy a big one! never know what you might catch.
      Or vice versa.

    384. Tinto Chiel says:

      Chilling, Smallaxe, chilling.

      Reminds me of the time I went to Arbroath to see my diddy team play in the Cup. Gayfield Park is right on the shore and they employed a Chiel in row boat to retrieve any balls blootered oot the park.

      When our right back duly obliged he set off into the North Sea haar and was NEVER SEEN AGAIN.

      I leave you to draw your own contusions…..

    385. Tinto Chiel says:

      Life is but a melon cauliflower…

    386. Tinto Chiel says:

      That’s bingo!

      Apologies for the first 11 seconds or so.

      Gwoosome, simply gwoosome…..

    387. Alex Clark says:

      @William Wallace

      Loved the vids of Phat Bollard, especially millionaire.

    388. William Wallace says:

      @ Alex

      Glad you liked it. They are a decent bunch with a good philosophy.

      What do you guys think about the idea of getting a band together to tour Scotland’s towns and cities with a pro indy & anti Westminster/Tory message? Would anyone be willing to get involved with something like that?

      I could do the sound engineering/PA side and possibly a bit of songwriting/singing if required and there are plenty talented people here for lyric writing, instrument playing and other roles. I know a couple of others who might be well up for something along these lines too.

      Could be combined with the battle bus idea I mentioned a while back and perhaps utilised for other purposes such as giving out pro indy lit, wbb, phantom film screenings, music cd distribution, debunking Yoon mythology and general entertainment/enlightenment.

      Just throwing the idea out there. Maybe start generating some real world momentum by getting an indy show on the road so to speak.

    389. Alex Clark says:

      @William Wallace

      Probably should have asked about 30 year ago and I think you would have got a few taking you up πŸ™‚ Most of us are past it now but I do think it’s a great idea.

      I’m going to park it for now in the pending folder and maybe when the next referendum is announced we could have another look and I will help as best I can. Get a bus on the road along with a couple of campers for kipping in for a couple of months, I’m sure we could raise funds.

      Indyroad show would be a blast, kickoff Dundee of course πŸ™‚

    390. Alex Clark says:

      A wee tune in memory of Glen Campbell not that one.

    391. Cactus says:

      On a guest tv… feature length Taggart just started.. Yes!

      Death Trap ‘brexit’!

      Aye SO checked out Lana Del Rey at ra Glasgow Hydro ra nite.

      Good vibrations.

    392. yesindyref2 says:

      Here’s one for FK15, probably aka John Alexander probably aka OBE.

      Problem for him is, it’s the same one. He’s running his own rings around himself.

      Some things don’t change πŸ™‚

    393. Nana says:

      Last links this morning for a while as I am having to go for more steroid injections [deep joy] so I won’t be able to type.

    394. Brian Doonthetoon says:

      In case anyone is mystified by my “Film at 11…” sign-off…

      It comes from the spoof news reports in “The Kentucky Fried Movie”.

      You’ll find a sort of trailer at this link:-

      The full movie is worth a watch, if you’re into the “Police Squad/Airplane” sense of humour. You can download it in two parts (mp4) here:-

      I enjoyed it in 1977 and last year, when I watched it again.

    395. Brian Doonthetoon says:

      Hi Alex Clark.

      In case you miss it…
      I’ve just replied to your ‘flood’ post in “The fine art of omission” topic. Enjoy the map!

    396. Tinto Chiel says:

      Best wishes, Nana. You’ve been working very hard recently.

      BDTT: hope you don’t mind but I’ve started looking at those burn names. Is Dighty pronounced Dytie or Dichty?

      Fowlis is “Fo ghlais” or wee stream in Gaelic.

      It all aids restful sleep…..

    397. Michael McCabe says:

      Hi Nana you have a nice break from the typing and we will look forward to your return. I know this is not Electric but a good bit of Guitar work if I say so Myself.

    398. Daisy Walker says:

      A wee request.

      I’m looking for the link to the video footage of the guy who ran the Better Together Campaign. He was giving a talk in Europe about the tactics of the campaign and how/why they did what they did.

      Pretty sure I saw it on Wings. Can anyone remember / post the link.

      And secondly – a few days ago, possibly on Twitter there was a poster of Europe with Wales highlighted in red – as one of the poorest regions in Europe – after 90 years of voting Labour.

      Can anyone find it. I want to print it off.

      Many thanks.

    399. Nana says:

      Cheers Tinto, hopefully won’t be too long till I’m back and in the meantime Smallaxe is well trained although he seems to have gone awol.

      Loved that Michael, and thanks to you I’m totally hooked on Luna and her Gayageum, simply wonderful.

    400. Brian Doonthetoon says:

      Hi Tinto Chiel.

      It’s “Dichty”, rhyming with “michty”.

      Hi Daisy Walker.

      Is this the video you’re after?

    401. David says:

      Daisy Walker, here`s an image of Wales:

    402. Liz g says:

      All the best Nana X

    403. Daisy Walker says:

      Dave, Brian – thanks exactly what I was looking for.
      Cheerie the noo.

    404. Marie Clark says:

      All the best Nana, you have my sympathy as I have arthritis in my hands as well. Take care.

      Smallaxe, any word yet on Lesley-Anne? I know that you were going to make a few discreet enquiries, but I haven’t been on the MT very often recently. I wondered if I had missed your answer.

    405. Smallaxe says:

      Marie Clark;

      Hi Marie, sorry, I’ve been having IT problems but all seems ok now, (Hopefully). I’m still having inquiries made about LA, the annoying but correct thing is that my daughter is the convener of our local SNP branch and has her address but of course can not give the information out even to me.

      I will let you know immediately if/when I find out anything.

    406. Marie Clark says:

      Thanks Smallaxe, it’s always a bit concerning when wingers go missing.

    407. Smallaxe says:

      I will do my best Marie, we are definitely talking about the same person, my daughter is trying to find out the situation from other members who may know her.

    408. Paula Rose says:

      Smallaxe also concerned about Lesley-Anne, in the meantime here’s a genre we haven’t enjoyed much of…

    409. Paula Rose says:

      Looking through my 45s for some more lovely bhangra and found this – totally O/T but…

    410. Brian Doonthetoon says:

      For all you peeps who have enjoyed “The Kentucky Fried Movie” today,

      Here’s a follow-up in the same vein.

      As usual, the links for download are underneath the big graphic.

    411. Liz g says:

      Add my concern for Lesley Ann too..

      While we are on the subject of missing Wingers
      Can anyone tell us if Cameron B Brodie is ok ?
      I haven’t seen him around for a wee while either!

    412. Smallaxe says:

      Will do Liz, CameronB hasn’t been on for a while either.

    413. Cactus says:

      They WILL return when they are ready to return.

    414. Liz g says:

      Aye they will Cactus.
      But we still miss them eh!
      I hope you are no thinking of going anywhere…
      Who would take care of the main thread through the night?

    415. Cactus says:

      Let the main thread flourish.

      Goodnight William Wallace ~

      If anybuddies gonna start a RIOT in this fine place…

      I’d love it to be you!

      Cheers bro.


      Times waits for no man (or girl)

    416. Cactus says:

      Mwah Liz g, aye the early morning is a beautiful place x.

      Back on ra Mama’s and ra Papa’s!

      “Cause it’s getting… better every day”

      La la la lah La la la lah La la la lah La la la lah La la la lah

      Ahm on a political staycation.

      Gies a shout YOUS TWO!

      When yer ready.

    417. Cactus says:

      And now…

      The shipping forecast.

    418. Cactus says:

      SO what’s been your favourite WOS article of the week SO far?

      Mines is this one:

    419. Cactus says:

      It wasnae disney wassit?

      Trust in me:

    420. Cactus says:

      Lists can be good:

      Jenny’s Burn

      Howde fellow iScots.

    421. Cactus says:

      “Dream a little dream” of you Scotland.

      Does yer Mama know?


    422. Cactus says:

      For future thought…

      Is there anywhere in Bonnie Scotland that begins with the letter Z?

      Working me way backwards now.

      It’s good to be off topic.

      Do what you do, you.

    423. Cactus says:

      Batter in night-commenting Wingspeople, ahm just out for a run.

      It’s good to be off topic!

    424. Cactus says:

      Aweright Rev ~


    425. Alex Clark says:


      Bed now! lol πŸ™‚

    426. Cactus says:

      And not one swear word tonight…

      That must be a fucking record.

      For the love of Ivy.

    427. Cactus says:

      Mornin’ Alex,

      Almost there.. be still, the music is too good to go to sleep.

      Just like the groove πŸ™‚

      Roll on soon.

    428. Cactus says:

      Cause ahm a real straight shooter if ye know what ah mean.

      Play it.

    429. yesindyref2 says:

      Anyone remember being at the disco, dancing with a girl, mouthing to the words as though you actually knew them? I loved this one.

    430. Smallaxe says:

      Marie Clark,

      I have been told by a gentleman that LA has been out and about although he never spoke to her, I will keep trying to find out more and let you all know ASAP.

    431. Tinto Chiel says:

      Smallaxe: thanks for the lovelybreakfast links but take S&G’s advice at the start:

    432. Smallaxe says:

      Tinto, thank you for your kind concern, my manky mate.

    433. Marie Clark says:

      Smallaxe, well that is good news that Lesley-Anne is out and about.

      At one point last year or maybe the year afore, she did take an extended break from posting, as she was being trolled big time by some clown on twitter. Hope it’s not that again.

      Anyway as long as the lass is okay an gon aboot, that’s no too bad.

      Thank you for all your endevours. Take care now.

    434. Smallaxe says:

      No problem, Marie, I know her twitter hasn’t been active for a while so maybe that’s the cause. Any other news I will let you know. Thank’s, I will take care.

    435. Tinto Chiel says:

      @BDTT: your Wuerzburg stuff was sobering. God knows why we targeted it. Shameful when we were supposed to be the Good Guys.

      Anyone fancy a little squeeze?

      I would have played this but I’m not really that kinda girl.

    436. Alex Clark says:

      @Brian Doonthetoon

      The Gelly burn eh! We called it the Gilly burn hence I thought the reason for the street name being Gillburn Rd. Learn something new on Wings everyday so you do.

    437. Tinto Chiel says:

      “Blessed are the cheesemakers.”

      Had to drive Mrs TC to a boring meeting today and hing aboot until it was all over.

      Repaired to adjacent Waitrose for a coffee, not a gaff I am familiar with. Passing through, I noticed a panel on the wall at the cheese counter with outlines of France, Italy, Netherlands and the UK.

      The UK panel showed there is apparently no cheese anywhere in Scotland, but four English cheeses were shown.

      Puzzled, I asked the lady at the heavily-stocked counter what Scottish cheeses she had for sale. “Just Orkney,” she said.

      One cheese, one feckin’ cheese…..

      The only uplifting experience was in the cafΓ©, where some vile sep had obviously left a copy of The National among the Heils and Hootsmans.

      And mine made two.

      Every day’s an insurgent day.

      Every little helps…..

    438. Alex Clark says:

      @Tinto Chiel

      A bit cheesed off then? No surprised.

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