In the tropical heat
We never got a response to our last job application, but we’re not easily dispirited here at Wings, so we’re trying again.
So little is happening in Scottish politics at the moment that we need SOMETHING to do all day. And let’s face it, the bar to improve on the previous incumbent isn’t high.
The required criteria all seem to be met. We’re both essential AND desirable:
So let’s have a bash.
Blimey, what’s a “Dr.rer.nat.habil”?
Hmm, my ethnicity can be Scottish but my nationality can’t.
Absolutely no qualifications required! Yay!
My references are impeccable, covering the worlds of politics, media and academia.
(Oddly there was no option for “Rt. Hon.” as title.)
I attached the following as my covering letter/CV:
On accepting the role in April 2019, the previous incumbent of this position stated that its primary goal was to restore “faith in public service, politics and the political process” and promote “rational, evidence-based thinking”.
Given the current state of public faith in politics in Scotland – which I presume I do not need to detail at length to the Centre – it seems beyond any reasonable dispute that her incumbency was a spectacular failure in that regard. According to the Standards Commission for Scotland in 2022, just 5% of the public believe that “our elected officials are in it for the country’s best interests”.
Indeed, in November 2022 a poll conducted by Panelbase and specifically referencing the Centre and its previous Director found that 31% of Scottish respondents agreed with the statement “I have LESS trust and faith in Scotland’s politics and political process than I did in April 2019”, with 52% saying they had the same amount and only 16% saying they had more.
Since November 2011 I have been the editor of Wings Over Scotland, the most-read Scottish politics website on planet Earth. For the entirety of that time my work has been focused on investigating and exposing the reasons why the public lacks faith and trust in politics, and on debunking false assertions by establishing and disseminating verified, sourced facts, including via the commissioning of dozens of opinion polls.
I have managed scores of contributors and contractors, both paid and unpaid, over that period. This has included supervising large and complex projects like the production and distribution of the widely-acclaimed and influential “Wee Blue Book” to every corner of Scotland in 2014, where it was read by over 850,000 people.
For almost all of these 12 years Wings has consistently been read by hundreds of thousands of people a month, and on the basis of its record is trusted to the extent that they fund its work – the site is entirely supported by voluntary public subscriptions and donations, which have totalled over £1 million during its life, in addition to significant sums also raised for charitable causes.
(In addition to his academic qualifications, my referee Professor Murphy has in his capacity as a professional accountant handled my financial affairs for the last seven years and can attest to my fundraising abilities.)
This work has been widely recognised. To cite just a handful of examples:
– in 2014, STV called Wings “Arguably the most exciting, invigorating and innovative entrant to the Scottish media world in recent years.”
– and Journalism.co.uk described it as “irreverent, brave, challenging, intelligent and often carries brilliant analysis and debunking”.
– in 2017 the best-selling author Darren McGarvey observed in The Scotsman that “Whether you love, loathe or grudgingly respect him, the Bath-based nationalist is the Yes movement’s most influential opinion shaper – excluding Nicola Sturgeon herself.”
– in 2021 the New Statesman described how Wings had “irrevocably transformed online politics in Britain”, not just Scotland.
These are the exact qualities the Centre professes to seek in a Director – an ability to reach and engage with large audiences, to establish evidence-based findings, to raise funding, to manage teams, to set strategies, run campaigns, achieve measurable outcomes and most of all to change public attitudes and perceptions. And who better for the role than someone with an extensive track record of exposing misdeeds in political life for over a decade?
Conversely, the Centre’s previous efforts to achieve its goals by hiring failed/retired politicians – the very people in whom the public has so little faith and trust – appear to have met with no discernible success whatsoever. Recent research conducted by my site found close to zero public awareness of ANY work conducted by the previous Director in service of the Centre’s stated goals, let alone success.
(Indeed, if anything they have made the situation worse. In 2019/2020 your previous Director was found by four of Scotland’s most senior judges to have grossly defamed an investigative journalist with a highly offensive and entirely false slur while serving as a party leader. I was able to observe these events extremely closely, being the journalist in question.)
Perhaps it’s time for the Centre to adopt a new and more radical approach.
There we go. I’ll let you know if everyone at the interview is nice.
Good luck, keep us posted.
Your are awful , but I like you.
An amusing tilt at the windmills. Unfortunately, I suspect a prerequisite for the next Director will be a demonstrable, previous close proximity to Foggy Bottom.
Perhaps “Prof” Stephen Gethins will transfer from the University of St Andrews (although his area of expertise is international rather than domestic).
Angela Crawley isn’t standing at the next Westminster GE.
I mean, it’s a solid application. By all rights they should at least give you an interview because you are highly experienced in the field. Here’s a question, on the unicorns actually existing like chance they actually offered it to you would you take it?
Now, of course you could have submitted an alternative application, citing your achievements but in a non detailed fashion ( do we really think Kezia is a facts laden behemoth?) and seen if given the bait of such a worthy candidate, they did come back to you with a keen interest.
Of course we all know it will be some ex Politician\Honorable that gets it ( Jim Murphy is now too big back in with New New Labour lobbying, Dame Ruth has her new Rigby Podcast…Michelle Mone perhaps?) and in truth we wont even notice bar the occasional BBC Scotland interview or random appearance on Question Time from the Uni cloisters.
Just why is sponsored by the Scottish Government though? Surely there are better things to spend hundreds of thousands of pounds on?>
I fear you may be over qualified for the role but otherwise you should walk it. Good luck, Sir.
That New Statesman article is a bit of attack piece – Kezia Dugdale won, Wings is transphobic and a quote from Leasky to wrap it up!! But then what would we expect?
If you do obtain a job interview, I take it that it will be of the type we used to refer to as, “without coffee”.
They’ll see the Bath address and you’ll be straight onto the shortlist…..
Hilarious. Guid.luck wi that. Widnae had yer breath waiting for an interview, though. Ye dinnae kick wi the right fit fir these days, i.e. a wee rainbow badge, the new SNP Masonic symbol. Nice Clash ref, tae.
Good luck, with those references that skillset and provable track record you should be a shoo in. I look forward to the response
Obviously a “Rer Nat” is a Scottish term to describe only the most outstanding of nationalists going. Alex Salmond is absolutely a Rer Nat.
???? i suppose you can try Good Luck ??
Well done Rev, that’s you hired. When can you start?
I’d hire you.
Remember the diversity angle – most jobs these days GUARANTEE an interview to anyone who is disabled, “disabled”, or is just feeling a bit poorly in themselves and needs a hug.
Tell them you have ADD, ADHD, autism spectrum disorder, BPD, PTSD, anorexia, bulimia, fibromyalgia, endometriosis, you have special needs can only be interviewed by telephone.
If in person, demand wheelchair access, a support worker, an emotional support animal, and turn up in your motorised wheelchair wearing an oxygen mask.
– if the interview is not going well, say you feel it is not a “safe space” and demand such a thing; the threat of the lawsuit and employment tribunal should always be present.
This guy has the right idea.
https://archive.is/McfMO
Remember actual lying on the CV is okay these days, as everyone does it and it “shows initiative”.
Most corporations have moved away from “competency based criteria” anyway, and you just need to show the right buzzword count.
simpler days –
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XGEXECLc__0
if you are really serious, cuz sometimes we need the poppy, just tell them you went to Hogwarts
https://www.google.com/maps/@55.9616112,-3.224611,3a,46.7y,349.64h,96.77t/data=!3m6!1e1!3m4!1s_Sm1NmMhtPj2CiazBoAF7g!2e0!7i16384!8i8192?authuser=0&entry=ttu
Excellent. Over to you Glasgow Uni.
It will be very illuminating comparing your proven abilities with the abilities the shortlisted candidates claim to have.
I predict, you will not be getting an interview. And the excuse will be that you made the application public. I also predict, that they will hire yet another useless yoon.
If I was invited to be on the interviewing panel, I would decline their offer.
” They have only themselves to blame “.
I’m a bit worried they offer you the job.
Oh Stu, what are you like ahahahah
Just be careful there’s no kind of casting-couch deal going on, they might ask you in for interview and then try to pump you.
These things do happen!
🙁
You should have checked the box for disability. Then you’re guaranteed to be given an interview by law.
Good luck. Glasgow University needs you to restore freedom of speech. Freedom of thought. And free will.
If Ba Ba Blackford can’t shake them down for a seat in the house of Lords, and provided he knows where enough of the skeletons are buried (that don’t incriminate him also), then he would appear to be someone very interested… if only to fund the upcoming divorce.
Oh, you’re definitely a shoo-in! Your credentials are absolutely what they need (though not necessarily what they want) and they’d be lucky to have you accept the job!
But let’s be honest here, we know they’re not going to take you on-board. MORE’S THE PITY. But you’d only give them the credibility they don’t deserve.
Ask them if they can set out a fainting mat as well.
Just incase you feel a pseudo siezure coming on, like Emma Roddick. And your legs buckle at their line of questioning.
Oh and lastly, that you identify as black. Wear a black lives matter T shirt. And that you’re non binary. And that you believe that Scotland is a transgender country. Scottish by history. Identifying as British.
You’re hired.
Good stuff, would you have to move to Northern Britain to fulfill the role?
Brilliant! Oh, I wish I could watch the reactions of Dugdale & her Board. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Nah, sorry son, you’ve got a serious lack of measurable gobshitery on yer application.
Other candidates could include a certain Ms Sturgeon, Mr I Blackford, Ms M Black, Mr B Johnson, Ms E Truss, all could be seen more as “continuity candidates” than this site’s host. And continuity seems somehow more important than “capable, competent, literate, sensible”… Sorry Stu, but I doubt you have the necessary taint.
Wait! You missed out the “gender identity” question! Or is that too personal?
Ha, ha, ha.
You’re a shoe in
“Gizza job! I can do that!”
Love it !
Rev, through politeness you omitted to conclude the part on Dugdales court case that she was let off as being legally considered too thick to understand what she was saying..
Stuart, do you know who the University of Edinburgh recently appointed as their new rector? Simone Fanshaw, one of the group who created Stonewall.
In various sources he is described as a writer, broadcaster and activist who works as a consultant and practitioner in the field of diversity and inclusion. He is also described as a stand-up comedian (He apparently won an award at the Edinburgh Fringe way back in the early 1990s).
Sources all state he quit Stonewall due to their “extreme” position on trans rights. And that he has been at loggerheads with them ever since.
Good luck Stu.
First things to do when you get the post.
1. Rename the John Smith Centre (a bit boring) to something racier. – The Parallax Corporation perhaps?
2. Find out why Serbia and Montenegro are combined in the drop down nationality menu.
Bring back the Fred’s!
Clearly you are over-qualified, Rev, by a very long way.
Which is a pity because Steve @ 4.58 p.m. has produced a depressingly accurate list of the likely appointee – Sturgeon, Blackford, Black. No, hold on, it has to be a Labour politician of minimal talent – where to begin…
Nice one, but major error in forgetting to ask them if colouring in pencils and paper could be provided in the waiting room, to calm your nerves. But good luck!
Folks, my comment further up thread should read Simon Fanshawe and not ‘Simone Fanshaw’. I put the e the wrong way round.
I think one of the Alexander twins will beat you Stuart they’ve got the right sort of gravitas and they’re thick as shit , NO FFS I forgot about Shirley Anne Thick as Shit she’s a shoo in
Nice cover letter, however to get the job you’ll need to borrow Ian Murray’s union jack suit and wear it at the interview.
Also you’ll need to pledge your undying fealty to the monarchy, the union, and to keep Scotland under the thumb.
On the upside (if you can call it an upside) doors will open for you, you’ll be most welcome at Queen Elizabeth House, and at the BBC HQ in Finnieston.
You’ll rub shoulders with opposite of the great and the good in Scotland, and find yourself invited to unionist do’s. If you impress the high heid yins, you might even do a Susan Calman and find yourself on telly, and like Neil Oliver doors at the NTS will magically open for you.
But the minute you start talking of the benefits of independence, you’ll be dropped quicker than a Sir Keir Starmer Labour candidate.
You will face fierce competition for the post and I trust you will be able to answer the important questions asked at interview-Remember they are looking for a failed Politician
1) Can you fill in an expenses form
2) Are you able to get up on your hind legs and lie at every opportunity
3) Do you have a selective memory and be able to state, without embarrassment ‘I don’t recall, I can’t remember, I will get back to you on that’
4) Is your neck made of brass
5) Can you manufacture tears on demand
6) Will you be able to find some minor position for your pals, at a grossly inflated salary
7) How good are your deflection and denial skills
8) Do you sometimes wear a frock
9) Do you receive abuse from the public at large
10) Can you explain, in great detail, the physical and mental problems you suffer from
Who knows, you might get some competition from a few of the posters on this site!
At least you have gone through the motions-a bit like swimming in our rivers and seas at times.
Good luck. If you are unsuccessful, which I suspect you might be, please don’t be too disappointed. You could always apply to be a Government Minister at Westminster. You don’t ever need to be an MP-just ask ‘call me Dave’ Cameron.
It is refreshing to see posts from ‘names’ I have never seen before. It helps to dilute the repetitive posts from the Wings ‘favourites’ who are on here every day.
As famously said by Sir Humphrey in Yes Prime Minister ( with a look of absolute horror on his face as one of Jim Hackers junior ministers had made a decision)
“ The position is an honorary one, its duties merely ceremonial, and its responsibilities are there to be enjoyed, not exercised !
You’ll also need to prove to the interrogators, I meant interview board, that you get physically excited when thinking of ways to f*ck Scotland over, you may be asked to describe a way to make Scots lives more miserable and poorer.
You’ll also need to be very enthusiastic about Westminster’s wars around the globe, the JSC is a big big fan of fracking, to get the bosses onside declaring your love of fracking at all levels no matter how detrimental it is to the environment will endear you somewhat to the board.
Also being half decent at darts, (you’ll need to hit Alex Salmond’s coupon on the dart board in the JSC cafeteria) will add gravitas to your claim, wearing the UJ suit whilst throwing the darts at Salmond’s coupon will help cement your position as one of the gang.
Let’s hope the jobs not being lined up for Sturgeon.
I think Republic of Scotland linked the John Smith Institute, future leaders programe. All Johnny Foreigner.
Our once proud Glasgow University, captured. The university of Glasgow. More like. The university of Guangzhou… And the John Smith Masonic lodge globalist wokeratii.
No native Scots need apply.
I don’t think your a cultural fit Stu. Your Gender Critical, capable of Independent critical thought. Honest to a fault, and your male and white. any chance your considering transitioning? Then forget it, you don’t tick any boxes. The best person for the job no longer applies.
While your experience, abilities and successes, much of it at an appropriate level, seem a good fit for this job,, I must advise you that we will not be taking your application further.
“You would (do not*) not fit into our culture. You do understand that, don’t you?”
(*As said to me when I was fired by a Local Authority, for pointing out that embezzlement was unethical.)
This isn’t a nasty little trick on your part to get a salary increase from us?
Ferguson Marine: Glen Sannox sets sail on first round of sea trials
https://www.heraldscotland.com/news/24117056.ferguson-marine-glen-sannox-sets-sail-first-round-sea-trials/
David Hannah @ 6:50 pm
“More like. The university of Guangzhou…”
Yes, very few Scots academics (maybe 4 or 5) in this joint Glasgow/Strathclyde dept comprising over 100 academic staff, mostly from China, Turkey and Greece: https://www.strath.ac.uk/staff/?department=navalarchitectureoceanandmarineengineering
Very few Scots are now educated to be naval architects, which helps explain why we cannae build ferries; but China and Turkey are building plenty of ferries, including several for Scotland.
Does not take a rocket scientist to figure out what is happening here.
It is an organisation focused on increasing the people’s confidence in politics and public policy. You would widen the appeal of the organisation and strengthen its credibility across Scotland. It might be a goer. Who is the competition?
Other important factors on getting your foot in the door so to speak, are you must at all times when in strange company or on tv say with a straight face ( a slight smile is acceptable) that you are a Proud Scot.
Also when outside the JSC shibboleth, when asked a question on Scotland, you must always say that you are working to better Scots lives even though that’s an outright lie and the opposite is the real truth.
Smiling and waving a lot in public is a good way of deflecting doubters, and endearing old grannies to you.
You would have a pretty good chance of being hired if you agreed to abandon Wings Over Scotland.
But then the accusations of betrayal by your loyal readership would make accusations against the biggest betrayer in Scottish history sound trivial.
For the sake of Scottish independence and the best journalism in the country, we wish you bad luck with your application.
1st question Stu “ How old is yer granny” ? . Please give an instantaneous answer (standard question for establishment hierarchy position).
As Confused suggested, work the disability angle to the max. Ludicrous endometriosis claim plus leg-shaving and Chanel Little Black Number should ensure success.
Claim you wrote biography of Keir Hardie (nobody checks).
Sorted….
Is there some way you can self identify as a “New Scot”?
It’s possible that New Scots will be automatically short-listed for interview. They certainly are for some less senior jobs.
David Hannah probably has the right idea. If Sturgeon wants the job, it’s hers.
She has waited long enough for the international job offers to come through. They’re nae coming noo.
Doug @ 5.45
Haha “bring back the Freds”
Showing ur age.
You must have been on a proper course where you got up before lunchtime.
It’s terrible Alf Baird. None of these people want to stay in Glasgow when they finish their studies. And they go home for the holidays and after graduation. Gone is Glasgow’s shipbuilding. I go to a men’s shed club and there’s so many old guys that would be amazing lecturers with great banter we can all relate to from the yard.
The middle class Glaswegians are the worst of them all. They speak with a snooty clarity that would embarrass most entonians. They let themselves be minstrel dollies. And drape about the west end in a trendy jacket – with an LGBT, EU and I love Nicola badge – but know none of Glasgow chill.
Their daddies are flying down to Canary Warf while they eat Scottish smoked Salmon for breakfast.
These people are part of the problem. The John Smith gentrified mafia. There a disgrace.
I can’t help but think of that documentary from the 1980s with the woman lecturer from Glasgow University that went undercover in the easy end. Does anyone know her name? I’m also reading Young Mungos. Fantastic book.
Nothing’s changed. Glasgow University is not for the working class of thd east end. Not with this SNP cutting places for Scots.
Rev. Stu – Blimey, what’s a “Dr.rer.nat.habil”?
Good old Wikipedia answers the question:
In many European and non-English-speaking countries, Habilitation is the highest university degree, sometimes abbreviated Dr. habil.
Germany differentiated between doctorates in philosophy and doctorates in the natural sciences, abbreviated as Dr. rer. nat. and also doctorates in the social/political sciences, abbreviated as Dr. rer. pol.
Did Glasgow Uni miss out rer. pol. for this illustrious job? Tsk.
My point is this. None of the John Smith Institute has felt the chill of the city of Glasgow and her needs.
They don’t have a fucking clue. Their das were not being put out if work on the river Clyde or pulling slag from the coalfaces of cardowan. There not living in box flats paying £850 for a 1 room in the west end while trying to make ends meet. They own the flats. They rent them out. They rip off the locals. The west end is China town.
No wonder trust in politicians is so low. Especially when the SNP betray Scotland. The nationalist party now the Judas party.
I hope Campbell gets the job in the John Smith Institute and tears it up. And all of their pish woke future leaders campaigns for Johnny Foreigner.
This is a scottish university. In the yes voting city of Glasgow. Of the ancient kingdom of Scotland. The second city of the empire. The land of invention and enlightenment.
Sort it out. And take our universities back. They’ve been captured for too long.
The John Smith masonic lodge has felt no pain. It doesn’t feel poverty. Bills. Isolation. Lonliness and lack of opportunities. Alcoholism. It’s not been beaten down.
They’ve probably came up with the 65p tax, and increase on business rates in Glasgow as a good idea.
All the pubs are shutting down. Men are taking to drink at home and dying of lonliness. And Asian food shops are all over the West end.
Stick your chopsticks up your snooty nose. That’s how I feel. I can’t stand what they are doing to our way of life.
Look at Maryhill road. All the pubs have gone. The Wyndford has shipped out all of the locals and 600 flats are empty. As Alex Salmond shed light on.
Last thing I’ll say. The entitled woke students are given free rail travel. 18-24. Free travel. They are so entitled. Then they have a mental breakdown when the real world hits. They have no right to lecture us on hardship. Or morals. They haven’t a clue.
We need help. I’m glad you’ve made this post. I hope it humiliates the institition. Absolutely humiliates them. This is what I think. Of your green emission zones. Your LEZ and your cycle lanes. You’re a joke. And you’ve failed the city. And destroyed it. And you’re killing the working class by the day.
And the very final thing I’ll say. You can’t understand a, bloody word the foreign lecturers are saying. And their thick accents. Their heart is not in it. Value for money. You can’t take it all in. You only take in 10 per cent of lecture. And then you miss the 10 per cent, because you can’t understand Japanese or South Indian. Sorry. Not sorry.
It’s a fact. And it ruins the experience of learning. You feel cheated.
Oh! The places you’ll go!
@David Hannah 9:50,pm
Many months ago or a year ago I predicted the MUP would rise to 65p on this blog despite the evidence being based on a theoretical exercise between the difference of Englands consumption and Scotland during Covid lockdowns. A false evidential base. I don’t know about the rest of you but I think the release of a SNP/Green Scottish Government would do wonders for reducing our alcohol consumption in Scotland. And the salient point is the Scottish Government are driving public opinion rather than remembering their manifesto on which they were elected. They serve us.
Dear Rev…
If poss, please post their response…
Good luck!
Would say a lot if MI6 give it to Sturgeon
Sorry, I fear your success in such a role would only highlight the complete waste of money that Dippy Dug was.
You don’t promote Labour and you cannot turn a blind eye to the disaster they have been for the last 55 years and their pathetic attempt to held the worst Tory party in history or form an
agenda that might win the next election.
The ideal candidate can find the truth, distort it and bury it on behalf of the London parties.
Good Luck!
But you may be deemed to have dangerous terrorist supporting motives. Don’t tell me you didn’t pick that video for the paragliders neat the start.
Also, which Samoan nationality did you choose? The 1st Samoan option or the 2nd?
Tell them Hatuey sent you, and if the man asks at the interview why you want the job, tell him you don’t; tell him you want his job.
Someone actually told me to say that once, as serious advice. I was young back then, younger than I am now, just starting to come to terms with being a genius…
David Hannah @ 9:21 pm
“Sort it out. And take our universities back. They’ve been captured for too long.”
Indeed so, and much like all the institutions in a colonial society:
https://yoursforscotlandcom.wordpress.com/2024/01/17/the-colonisation-of-scotlands-universities/
If they were really smart they’d give you the job. It’s their best chance to shut down your blog.