I always like to try to salvage something of value out of the most worthless commodity of the digital age: spam. Most of the cast of characters in Hell Yeah! are named after the "senders" of spam emails, and earlier today I was going through the followers on the Twitter account of my Scottish politics site blocking all the pornbots and noticed a slightly odd shared characteristic in the process.
Almost every one had a single-word biog, and as I went down the list it seemed to have a certain poetry. I had just enough syllables to make two haikus (plus titles), with four left over. If you can do better with the words, send 'em in.
There are two reasons I’m incredibly happy about suddenly and unexpectedly rediscovering it – as I just have – of which the first is the less important.
Alert readers may recall a few weeks back I gave an interview to a blog written by a bunch of – well, let's call them "games journalists" for want of a more accurate term. A straightforward enough business, you might think – ask questions, get replies, publish, done. It didn't work out quite that simply.
While the interview caused a huge hit spike on the site and an unprecedented number of comments (over 100 compared to their usual three or four), this sudden influx of visitors and attention caused great consternation among some of the blog's editors other than the charming and talented young writer who'd done the interview.
Two of them – a pair of particularly lily-livered Future Publishing corporate drones – whined all over Twitter and elsewhere that the (incredibly mild) arguments in the comments were so beastly and upsetting that they were considering deleting the entire site, rather than attract all these awful, horrid people (ie, readers) to it by speaking to such a nasty man.
Long story short, to spare the hurt feelings of the less-popular stories on their blog (which is to say, all of them) the interview has been quietly deleted. So I've retrieved it and posted it below for posterity.
Man, I've been waiting for this to happen for ages. A long long time ago, when I was barely half as old as I am now, there was a magazine called Cut. A sort of artsier Scottish version of the NME, it was a music-and-culture-and-politics newspaper that came out either weekly or fortnightly, I forget which.
Either way, in 1989 Cut began publication of a comic strip written by Grant Morrison (the eccentric/mental creator of Zenith and The Invisibles, among many others), called The New Adventures Of Hitler.
Young Lochinvar on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: “He’s thrown himself into the arena of public consciousness. Taking notes in his book of grudges and pulling his nostril…” Jul 26, 02:14
Young Lochinvar on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: “Fingers crossed. I suspect there is a lot of money backing it though..” Jul 26, 01:58
Young Lochinvar on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: “Just exactly the same “green and pleasant England” propping up failed Scotchland too wee too poor too stupid, begging bowl…” Jul 26, 01:42
Young Lochinvar on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: “Correct. It was a dynastic takeover following on from the Picts apparently taking the biggest hit (hierarchy wise) from standing…” Jul 26, 01:31
Mark Beggan on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: “The damage is being acutely felt across every sector. This Upton maniac has not only shown himself for what he…” Jul 26, 00:28
Hatey McHateface on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: “What makes you think it was an accident, Rob? The sterling efforts by the Covid Spreaders, long after it had…” Jul 26, 00:27
Hatey McHateface on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: “What make you think it was an accident, Rob? The sterling efforts by the Covid Spreaders, long after it had…” Jul 26, 00:24
Hatey McHateface on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: ““Do the Norwegians lie in their beds at night fretting over whether their country has an impact out of proportion…” Jul 26, 00:14
Hatey McHateface on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: “Given the historical concerns over the damage to the environment (and human health) caused by female hormones found in fresh…” Jul 26, 00:05
Rob on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: “Everyone believed it was possible, it has been for some considerable time. What no-one believed was that it was possible…” Jul 25, 23:54
Hatey McHateface on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: “Northcode breaking entirely new ground on Wings BTL. He’s been colonised to the power of two. Colonised squared in other…” Jul 25, 23:51
robertkknight on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: ““However there is no doubt that we had an impact out of proportion to our size. The problem will be…” Jul 25, 23:49
Fearghas MacFhionnlaigh on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: “3-YEAR-OLD WITH PUBERTY SYMPTOMS AFTER EXPOSURE TO FATHER’S ‘SEX CHANGE’ DRUGS A three-year-old has experienced signs of puberty after exposure…” Jul 25, 23:22
Hatey McHateface on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: ““ardent nationalists for a madeup “country” they couldn’t find on a map” What was it the Burns boy wrote? Something…” Jul 25, 23:01
Northcode on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: “This: People who identified themselves as Picts formed a majority group in the new kingdom, and most of them remained…” Jul 25, 23:01
Nae Need! on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: “Yip. A criminal mafia. And a disgusting bunch of perverts to boot.” Jul 25, 22:22
Mark Beggan on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: “Call me anglophobic but there’s a little England in NHS Fife.” Jul 25, 22:10
Hatey McHateface on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: “@Rob I suspect you may be new on here. So you won’t know that according to the usual Wings BTL…” Jul 25, 22:04
Fearghas MacFhionnlaigh on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: “Marie, as a Scottish Republican and Christian, I’ll post this comment here if I may — SOME HISTORICAL SCOTTISH CONTRIBUTIONS…” Jul 25, 21:54
Hatey McHateface on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: “@Rob says: 24 July, 2025 at 1:54 pm All that needs to be said, and can be said, to summarise…” Jul 25, 21:49
Hatey McHateface on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: “FFS, Marie. Open the een the Guid Gowd gave ye. Learn to deal with the world as it is -…” Jul 25, 21:38
Hatey McHateface on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: ““Tnere’s no two way’s about it.” Erm… two way’s of what?” Jul 25, 21:32
Hatey McHateface on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: “Good to see you self-identifying as a Pict, NC. I can happily address my racist bigotry at you. And I…” Jul 25, 21:30
Xaracen on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: ““Yes – you’re happy to waffle endlessly about how the treaty doesn’t “subordinate” Scotland to England, but as soon as…” Jul 25, 21:26
Andrew scott on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: “Uphisbottom went out of HIS way to create confrontation The barsteward” Jul 25, 21:23
Hatey McHateface on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: “Their chromosomes? Ah ken we believe it to be impossible. But only a few years ago we all kent that…” Jul 25, 21:22
sarah on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: “Interesting to read elsewhere that Upton kicked up a row on a placement at another hospital. On a home visit…” Jul 25, 21:20
Nae Need! on Everybody’s Normal Nowadays: “Aye, cos I actually agree with Lorn on many matters, this wee disagreement actually matters. Lorn, we are a colony.…” Jul 25, 21:09