Prolonged exposure to the unfamiliar phenomenon of sunshine appears to be getting to some on the Unionist side in Scotland today. Firstly, Johann Lamont’s spin doctor Paul Sinclair is having some sort of nervous collapse over on Twitter, seamlessly blending every piece of absurd smearing about Alex Salmond from the last couple of weeks into a single thread of tramp-in-a-bus-station lunacy.
(Summary: he’s fat, Saltires are bad, liking golf is bad, the FM is in some way similar to the popular footballing racist John Terry, and there’s even enough time to squeeze in a quick reprise of the classic “cybernat hordes forcing X off Twitter” routine.)
It’s not even today’s best breakdown, though.
Below is a picture of Torcuil Crichton’s column in this morning’s Daily Record.
Just for flavour we’ve included a bit from the lead item, in which Wee Mental Torcuil refers to “the SNP’s ‘Bannockburn’ history of English oppression” (what?), but the real prize is the boxout below, in which some sort of dispute among Welsh arts types about singing at rugby or something has somehow been contorted into a bewildering attack on the Scottish independence movement.
We still haven’t quite managed to work out what on Earth the poor overheated reporter is trying to actually say. Can anyone translate the piece into sane for us?