Off-topic
Posted on
January 02, 1968 by
Rev. Stuart Campbell
For off-topic chat. Duh.
The world's most-read Scottish politics website
-
About
Wings Over Scotland is a (mainly) Scottish political media digest and monitor, which also offers its own commentary. (More)
-
Recent Posts
- 03-12
- 03-11
- 03-08
- 03-07
- 03-06
- 03-05
- 02-27
- 02-25
- 02-22
- 02-21
- 02-20
- 02-15
- 02-12
- 02-11
- 02-11
- 02-10
- 02-08
- 02-07
- 02-05
- 02-03
A tall tale
Wee Books
Video
Probably a robbery
Transphobia
Anent low dives, was it the Oxford Tavern that had a curtain & a bucket for the ladies?
@Smallaxe –
Aye, cheers for the link to the Plant Pot song.
Sinister stuff – I’ll have that tune in me napper for weeks.
Fred,
This wan?
link to oldglasgowpubs.co.uk
Ian B,
Your welcome brother, you should learn the words for your party piece.
Fred,
Here are some o’ yer pals,
“Go Lassie go” Live music in Scotia Bar, Glasgow
link to youtube.com
Ur you ther?
Good afternoon, aesthetes.
May I, on behalf of the PR Gaff Renaissance Committee, thank all of those who contributed suggestions towards the improvements required to make this famous locale a valuable addition to our modern life-styles.
Some observations: totally get where you’re coming from in terms of your decision re. the plant pot, Ian. I still reckon it’s marketable once sterilised in a surgical autoclave but w/o PR ony mair we’ll need a seat as you say, her lap not being available.
Cactus: should be nae probs with plunge pool and side-sauna but there may be a H&S issue with Embra crystal whisky tumblers in the vicinity. Ditto with cearc’s feather suggestion (possible allergic reaction situation).
Hate to be a Doleful Dan but it’s the modern litigious world wot we live in.
Fred: any thoughts? Your feedback/opinion is valuable to us.
Must go: Harvey wants me to go on a truffle-hunt with him doon the braes.
Great link to that site of old Glasgow pubs, Smallaxe. It’s now in my faves.
Meant to ask: should the marag dubh tapas be the Stornoway variety? I have a Dingwall butcher option up my sleeve if required.
Meanwhile, John and I are engaged in further product research:
link to youtube.com
Good afternoon, Tinto,
I had missed the suggestion from Cactus regarding a plunge pool but I think that we could skirt around the H&S regulations by just filling the said pool with booze and therefore dismissing any need for the Embra crystal glasses.
“Swimming Pools” (Drank) Kendrick Lamar
link to youtube.com
Say hi to Harvey for me.
Just saw your latest on the way oot the door, Smallaxe. Harvey’s getting a bit excited by the thought of fungi.
That’s a cunning plan to obviate the need for glasses. We could just make Kendrick the pool attendant, and no need for chlorine as a steriliser.
Quite brilliant, imho. Need to do something about his language, though. A bit fruity for The Laydees.
See youse all later, post truffles.
Tinto,
Don’t forget to do the,
“Truffle Shuffle”
link to youtube.com
Drum-roll in the pail at the Oxford! the very wan.
Murdo Fraser might help out with woodland fungus, a “Truffle-Hunt!” if ever ah seen wan!
Wow! That’s the kinda entry-control system we could use in the new, improved gaff, Smallaxe.
I like this sort of shuffle masel:
link to youtube.com
It’s my age.
Hows about,
Van McCoy,
link to youtube.com
I’ll be back in about half an hour.
I think that’s more a bad case of buttock fyke masel, Smallaxe.
Back soon. Nae truffles fun the day but Harvey picked a nice basket of sumfin he calls Avenging Angel.
Laters, haters…..
What’s happened to the lava lamp?
The lava lamp is lurking in the ladies lavvy, Ian, for some strange reason the ladies like singing to it.
“Lava Lamp”
link to youtube.com
@Smallaxe –
I dunno if Rev applies hammers for excessive alliteration, but he may start after that.
PS Came to me in lightning-bolt style t’other day what this ‘novel’ is about. The message is ‘Fuck The Tories’ and always has been, I just didn’t realise it. Nowt new, but it simplifies matters a lot…
“Fuck The Tories” seems like a very saleable title Ian, I can see that being a best seller.
Thank Fuck for that,
“Lightning Bolt”
link to youtube.com
Great title, Ian, but, unlike Smallaxe, I foresee difficulties at the publishing stage, unless you are employing post-modernist irony.
Me, I’ve got post-romantic angst.
link to youtube.com
Btw, Harvey finished all them mushrooms. now the rabbit’s wabbit oot.
That’s a funny bunny you have there, Tinto, it’s like a,
“Public Animal” Alice Cooper;
link to youtube.com
Loving all the changes going on. As long as you can still get an all day full Scottish Breakfast a brandy and a good Tune? Then I guess I am here forever
TC, Nae problem with ‘fruity language’ it’s a mere trifle.
That footage looks a bit rough, Smallaxe. That reminds me, must get my spandex jumpsuit dry-cleaned for my spring wardrobe.
cearc says:
“TC, Nae problem with ‘fruity language’ it’s a mere trifle.”
I suppose such language would be just desserts, cearc. Btw, can you supply the free range eggs for the new breakfast menu? Please advise.
Michael: nae probs. The PRGR Steering Committee are consulting on a breakfast menu shortly but there will be some hard choices to be made, imo, e.g.:
Fried tattie scone or oven-baked tater waffle?
Lorne sausage or beef or pork links?
Fried mushrroms or baked beans?
Sliced haggis/black pudding/white pudding (Stornoway or Dingwall style?)
As for brandy: Cognac or Armagnac?
No-one said this was going to be easy…..
TC, breakfast choices.
1. Fried tattie of course (oven-baked, wtf?)
2. Sq sausage of course.
3. both.
4. both
5. Armagnac.
I have just about enough eggs for my breakfasts at the moment.
Ian, How’s about ‘Frack the Tories’? Might flog a few to the environmental folk.
@cearc –
cearc: thank you. Your feedback is important to us in terms of improving our service going forward. The oven-baked potato waffle was the healthy option, btw.
Will endeavour to source free-range organic eggs elsewhere but thank you for your input.
Onwards, the Risorgimento…
A pair of kippers, fried soda-scone & Laphroaig for a vegetable!
I don’t think the guys allow vegetables in the conservatory so we’ll have to drink the Laphroaig ourselves.
Anyhows, I thought we were going to refer to it as the orangerie given that we aren’t in the conserving (innovative jam?) of tories business.
Fred: you’re talking my language, although can’t say I’m a huge fan of Laphroaig, but I could nobly struggle with my distaste given the importance of my five-a-day. Didn’t know whisky had been reclassified as a vegetable. New Scottish Government measure?
IMPORTANT KIPPER INFORMATION:
Was in the fish shop today, looking at the fine display of kippers in the window. The young ‘monger, a stalwart Yesser and fine fellow, informed me the best way to cook them IHO was to jug them in boiling water in a suitable container, placing a lid of some kind over the top and taking them off the heat. Leave them for seven minutes, drain the water and then devour them, poached egg optional.
No more kipper stink caused by grilling/frying.
It makes you think…
Though I don’t eat meat I do find fish felicitous fair for fair-minded folk.
Reluctant Nationalist
I’m actually trying to articulate a post-colonial perspective through post-modern critical social theory, if you want to get picky. This outlook values difference, whereas Marxists value the principle of universality. That’s why a sense of one’s cultural roots is important, as it tempers the Marxist tendency towards uniformity and cultural insensitivity.
Meat Beat Manifesto ?- Radio Babylon (Version Galore)
link to youtube.com
Reluctant Nationalist
…I’m actually trying to articulate a post-colonial perspective through post-modern critical social theory, if you want to get picky. This outlook values difference, whereas Marxists value the principle of universality. That’s why a sense of one’s cultural roots is important, as it tempers the utilitarian, Marxist tendency towards uniformity and cultural insensitivity. Tories and Marxist-Trots, two pees in a pod, both living in a world that is rooted in ideology centered around utilitarianism, without reference to lived experience in the everyday world. ?
I don’t know why that question-mark keeps popping up.
Reluctant Nationalist
Would an ideologue highlight the significance of human rights and make use of critical realist philosophy and stuff? Would a Tory or Marxist oppose Brexit? Do you think I’m a nationalist zealot?
link to onlinelibrary.wiley.com
link to citeseerx.ist.psu.edu
link to criticalrealismnetwork.org
Champagne jacuzzi & steam room to add per chance…
Costumes may be worn at all times.
Toga-tag-team.
31018
Not everyone’s cup of tea but some good stuff in here.
link to leftungagged.org
Cameron: do you think Reluctant Nationalist likes jugged kippers?
I note Yesindyref2 pulled his chain last night and he responded somewhat coarsely, not the mark of a gentleman, scholar or acrobat.
Cactus: I note the ambiguity of “Costumes MAY be worn at all times.”
Care to explain yourself?
Another couple of weeks & the Cod-Roe will be back on the menu, sliced & fried in breadcrumbs with some Ayrshire Bacon & a glass of something sparkly! Is that yer Ayrshire Bacon or are ye just warmin yer hauns? did I hear U say.
One of my Dear Old Dad’s favourite sayings, Fred . He used to tease his sister in law, who always wore a housecoat which got grubby with the smuts from the range.
“Haw, Tina, I see you paid the coal man!” was one of his refrains.
Things were simpler in them there days.
Top breakfast suggestion too.
Hey TC, am demonstrating that anything is poss in an iScotland.
To always have the freedom of choice.
Yes you may… you choose.
Taps aff!
Just realised a few days ago that ‘navvy’ is from ‘navigator’.
Can’t believe I didn’t make the connection before now, esp given that my maternal granda was a navvy, well, a ‘pipe-layer’.
Great images with this version…
The Pogues, ‘Navigator’ –
link to youtube.com
Cactus says, “Taps aff!”
Currently working on the old pects to show off my new Bri-Nylon mankini collection for Palermo this May, young man.
May take some time, tbh…
My mantra while working out:
link to youtube.com
Twerking ain’t as easy as it looks, btw.
Meant to say, Ian B: you may like a new book on John Maclean by Gerry Cairns, “The Red and The Green” available from Calton Books (seems strangely unavailable on Amazon but I like to give CB the business any way).
Reality bites:
link to youtube.com
I’ve already had my mid-life crisis: wore brown Argyle socks with black patent leather shoes when I hit 50.
Sublime waawaa:
link to youtube.com
I now see it was a part of the seventh rock from the sun that got me.
Cheers for ‘Mon the World Cup 2018 too.
The planets are lining up.
@TC –
Cheers, I’ll add that to the list.
Maclean is someone I know next to nothing about apart from the usual. If only we had someone like him right now. Mhairi Black’s about the closest I can think of…
You only need three more to have the complete set, Ian:
John MacLean/Maclean by John Broom
Ditto by his daughter Nan Milton
In The Rapids of Revolution by the man himself.
He was a man of unbending principle and intellect who was vindictively imprisoned by a terrified establishment and hounded to the grave. Even my Tory-voting parents respected him as a man of honest conviction and bravery.
In the past thirty years I’ve loaned out several copies of the above and never got them back
If you’re lucky you can track down fairly cheap copies on Amazon and Abebooks. Prices fluctuate wildly according to short-term availability.
@TC –
Cheers indeed. If I’m good I’ll maybe get one or more for my birthday.
BTW, the easiest was to twerk is to get someone else to do it for you. But if you’re determined to master it, practise makes perfect – you’ll know you’re getting good if you can sit on the bottom step of the stairs then make your way to the top without actually moving yer legs.
Thanks Ian: working on my gluteus maximus as we TYPE, as BDTT would say. His Titan Uranus photo reminded me of my unfortunate time in a Turkish prison: a simple misunderstanding if ever there as one.
BTW, your advice doesn’t work for this guy:
link to youtube.com
That’s where I’ve gone wrong! I started at the top and worked my way down, very quickly I may add.
TAJ MAHAL & RY COODER:”By & By”
link to youtube.com
‘…you can sit on the bottom step of the stairs then make your way to the top without actually moving yer legs.’
Aye, stair lifts are great!
Ouch!
“Chairlift Bruises”
link to youtube.com
@ Tinto, if this Jerry Cairns is an Irish guy, I met him years ago in this bothy, I was completely knackered & starving having walked all day & passed the place bye, there were Irish guys hingin oot an upstairs windae, no other building around so I walked back & asked politely if this was the bothy. “What dye think it is the fookin Ritz!” came the reply. So thinkin this is gonnae be some night wi this lot I sat doonstairs heid in hauns! After a period of silence the call came from above “Are you gonna sit down there all night like a Trappist nun or come up here & get yer dinner!” Ice broken & a great night.
If on the other hand it isnae him I shall still get the book! Is he signing it?
Anyone drop this outside…
link to youtube.com
Hi, Lucia, I never dropped it but I picked this up;
Janis Joplin:”Ball and Chain” (at Monterey)
link to youtube.com
Devo:”Whip it”
link to youtube.com
According to the advert you need a new housekeeper – the map brought me here.
Lucia, you came to;
“The Right Place”
link to youtube.com
If you came in Peace.
You are welcome here if you did,
“I come in Peace” Joe Cocker;
link to youtube.com
I waited in all day for the flaming NHS to come and do my hoovering. What did they do? They sent me this flaming link.
link to youtube.com
Mmm, it’d be cool if that sort of thing went virus for those who do twotter.
#BloodyNHS
yesindyref2,
I agree with that but what they sent you was a shame.
“It’s a Shame” The Detroit Spinners;
link to youtube.com
Smallaxe
Apparently they’re going to give this to patients in A&E triage
link to youtube.com
yesindyref2,
That’s “The Games People Play”
link to youtube.com
Are you still there, Lucia?
Hey Smallaxe nice to see you
Got a wee tune for you, can’t believe this is almost 50 years old. Seems like yesterday.
link to youtube.com
@Smallaxe 11:34
“Whip It” was that a cover of the original by the Flowerpot Men?
Thepnr, Hi!
This was 47yrs ago and feels the same way.
link to youtube.com
These Flowerpot men?
link to youtube.com
Don’t know!
Or these?
link to youtube.com
@Smallaxe
That gave me the goose pimples because it was so long since I heard it and it brings memories back. The French bit made me think of this. A song my old man loved that I played once before.
Found a live version this time which must be rare. Enjoy a classic.
link to youtube.com
Your second link was closest Bill and Ben was what “Whip It” reminded me of because of their headgear lol.
Thepnr,
This French song gave me more than goosebumps back then
link to youtube.com
The memories…
Thepnr,
I thought you meant them. We’re all wearing tinfoil headgear now.
“Paranoid”
link to youtube.com
Everybody that posts on Off Topic is marked!
Your either a hippie; punk; peacenik; pacifist; anarchist; atheist or communist.
Listen to the shit that politicians speak and wonder what’s changed?
link to youtube.com
That’s you telt!
Lucia,
“Silence”
link to youtube.com
?
@Smallaxe
Have you saw this one before?
link to youtube.com
I was marked long before Off Topic!
hippie; peacenik; pacifist; anarchist; atheist, guilty as charged several times.
“The Story of My Life” (THEY wrote it for me)
link to youtube.com
Thepnr,
Never heard it played like that, it’s new to me but I’m A;
“20th Century man”
link to youtube.com
John Trudell and Bad Dog:”Wild Seed”
link to youtube.com
True Story!
Peace out People.
Christ is that the time
Off to bed. Watch this but you need to put it on full screen to appreciate it. It’s no bad if your looking for memories.
link to youtube.com
Mmm, well …
link to youtube.com
For you, Fred:
link to facebook.com
Sorry I missed the party last night guys but Salma Hajek unexpectedly appeared at the house to help me and Harvey re-catalogue my butterfly collection. She loves a clouded yellow, so she does.
Fred: ever slept in the bothy near Sandwood Bay?
Good morning, Tinto,
I’ve got,
“Friday on my Mind”
link to youtube.com
Some crowd there, Billy but I fear young Gary does not share our strange, almost unnatural beauty. Just the guy to sit beside for the team photo.
Hear that colossal dorkspangler Farage on Pravdasound4 a couple of hours ago and this ditty came to mind:
link to youtube.com
Anyhow, must get on. Have to cleanse the Augean stables wot are Tinto Towers afore the Home Secretary gets back from work. Ma wee feather duster’s almost wore oot.
Farage!
Tell him I said …
link to youtube.com
Twice!
@ Tinto, thanks for that, I know the pub! never been in it though.
Sandwood Bay would be Strathan, haunted bay? been in the other two as well & Kearvaig which is 5 star, off the Cape Wrath track. Halcyon days, where have they gone!
Fred says:
“@ Tinto, thanks for that, I know the pub! never been in it though.”
That’ll be a first, Fred.
Only twice, Smallaxe?
Ou sont les neiges d’antan, Fred, eh?
Looking for new hillwalking partners: had to ditch my last lot ‘cos they were closet Cringers and Brexiteers. Almost blood on the cairns on Ben Ledi last year.
I feel better now……
Yes, Tinto,
only twice, I am sick fed up to the teeth wasting my breath on the psychopathic paedophilic lying cheating arrogant bastards that somehow think that they are in power in my country. The people are the power in any country, without the people they have no power.
They have proved for centuries that they use any power given to them to control the masses and fill the bank accounts of the rich.
Power is a wonderful thing and the people must take it back and use it wonderfully for the benefit of all, not the few.
John Trudell
link to youtube.com
Namaste
Smallaxe: amen to all that, but at times I feel it will be easier to raise the dead than get some Scots to open their eyes and see how they’re being shafted and rooked.
No surprise John Trudell is a Native American. Funny how these “primitive cultures” understand completely how all life is interconnected and should be respected, otherwise the planet is doomed.
“Only when the last tree has been cut down, the last fish been caught, and the last stream poisoned, will we realize we cannot eat money.”
A saying of the Cree people.
Tinto Chiel,
I have always considered myself as part of an ancient and primitively wise culture. “I have no degree or even an o level but I know an enemy when I see it”. Smallaxe of the Twelve Tribes.
“They made us many promises, more than I can remember. But they kept but one–They promised to take our land…and they took it”. Chief Red Cloud, Sioux.
A Tribe Called Red: “Sisters”
link to youtube.com
Namaste, my Sisters, you are the Mothers of all Mankind
Hi chaps, whit in the name o’ the wee man, hiv youse lot been up tae. Rearangin the hoose, ur ye quite share that Paula Rose has indeed shot the craw? Goad help the lot o’ you if she comes back.
Well, I seem to have lost my avatar, and canne mind how tae get it back. That would be a senior moment, sheesh. I’ve been kinda keepin an eye on the MT, but, jeez oh, this bloody nonsense is burstin my wee heid. When is independence day, is it ony time soon? I think I might jist huv tae tak a long walk aff a short pier.
link to youtube.com
They’ll no gte me mind, I’m no gon, and onywise I’m wearing my tinfoil hat, so there.
Oh look at that, my avatar has come back a’ by it’s wee self, Yipee.
Hi, Marie,
Just a wee change of emphasis, nothing to worry about.
Spirit I Am;
link to youtube.com
Namaste, Sister.
“Could You Be Loved”
link to youtube.com
Don’t let them fool ya,
Or even try to school ya! Oh, no!
We’ve got a mind of our own,
So go to hell if what you’re thinking is not right!
Love would never leave us alone,
A-yin the darkness there must come out to light.
“The Honourable Robert Nesta “Bob” Marley OM (Order of Merit)”
He that does truth comes into the light
For the younger O/T’ers:
Is this song about You!
“This Song”
link to youtube.com
Change it!
Maybe this is how we should approach Naysayers –
Extract from Wings Twitter: quote –
‘Robert
@RobDunsmore
Replying to @rosscolquhoun
He inadvertently makes the argument for a single market on these islands (sorry); independent nations trading together voluntarily, but not linked politically.linked politically. He doesn’t realise that’s what we’ve been arguing all along.’
51m
I repeat,
‘…a single market on these islands (sorry); independent nations trading together voluntarily, but not linked politically.’
Great to see that clip of Napoleon again, Marie. Reminds me of myself shortly before retirement.
Quite agree about all these unnecessary changes to Paula’s bijou maisonette: don’t know what Smallaxe is thinking of really. I’ve fought it all the way of course but, well, wotyagonnado?
“When a man moves away from Nature, his heart becomes hard.”
(Lakota saying.)
Ironically, when the US Govt. “resettled” the Navajo and Hopi (they of the nice silver jewellery) onto what it thought was worthless tracts of Arizona, it was unaware that it was full of oil and gas, which I believe is still unexploited and lying under the surface. Must try the planet-strippers mad.
NMPKT California has more NA reservations than any other state and, since the growing of medicinal cannabis is now legal there, huge areas of scrubby land is now being covered in cannabis farms, and in Arizona too, I think.
Karma karma karma.
Life’s too short to socialise wi Yoons Tinto, fuck them!
Some nice pics of Kearvaig Bothy by the sea, the right-hand bit of this bothy was once the school-room & the cliffs to the west are the highest in mainland Scotland I think? Hope this works? it should be https
link to flickr.com
Charles Trenet’s “La Mer!” would go with this Smallaxe.
Here you are, Fred,
Charles Trenet:”La Mer”
link to youtube.com
Gie’s a shout if ye waant any mer.
Tinto,
I notice that in your reply to Marie that you have (inadvertently I’m sure) slipped in a gigantic terminological inexactitude, I’m certain that you will strive to correct this nonsensical statement tout suite.
“Liar, Liar, pants on fire” Chingachgook, last of the Mohicans.
Ian Foulds, good idea Ian, thanks, nice to see you over here.
Fred: that’s a lovely spot, a bit like Camasunary on Skye, but more remote.
Sandwood Bay stuck in my mind because, in the early 70s I couldn’t sleep one night and put on Radio Clyde at 2 or 3 in the morning. “Night Hawk” had a feature on the haunting stories around there and after half an hour of that I lay awake until morning.
Have never worn PJs again…..
“I notice that in your reply to Marie that you have (inadvertently I’m sure) slipped in a gigantic terminological inexactitude, I’m certain that you will strive to correct this nonsensical statement tout suite.”
*Takes massive beamer*
I feel it, and admit it, Smallaxe mon vieux. Don’t know what came over me, tbh. Perhaps the fear of a 9″ stiletto heel up my schnozzle, but that’s no excuse. Hoping we can work through our differences to achieve a resolution in terms of amity going forward.
At least we’ll always have Gretna……
Btw, don’t Lucia Daines high heels remind you of Someone’s?
Or is it just me?
Since youse have pure brung up Mr Trenet’s chansons, Smallaxe, I append the following, about an artiste de pissoir who took his horse into a Med. night club or boite de nuit as we say in Cadzow. Things goes downhill from there.
Many years later he spins his grandweans a tale of his exploits as a pirate but the horse makes a comeback.
Chateau Lafite also plays an important role, it has to be said.
link to youtube.com
Or you can just sample the joie de vivre.
@Smallaxe
There’s wishful thinking and there’s the reality. Some light relief
link to youtube.com
Aye Smallaxe, I did notice Tinto’s er. wee fib. I’ve been keeping an eye on what you boys have been up to. You’ll be in deep doo doo if Paula turns up.
link to youtube.com
Thepnr,
If wishes were horses, beggars would ride. Grab a unicorn!
Riding the Unicorn
link to youtube.com
It’s Magic
Tinto,
Now that you mention it I thought that I caught a glimpse of a shapely well-heeled ankle disappearing into the ladies powder room last night.
Mmmm… muses thereon.
Marie,
I’ll be okay because I’m,
“Not Guilty” George Harrison;
link to youtube.com
Smallaxe:
Getting your drift.
Could it be?
Tinto,
I think that there is a good chanceibility of that! We may get another visit tonight, hopefully.
The games afoot, Watson…
Bring your army revolver.
Where’s my apostrophe?
Where’s my motivation?
Tinto,
“Where’s your head at”?
link to youtube.com
@Holmes
Guess I was a little slow on the uptake, did a hard reboot and everything seems to be operating normally now.
We should never have let the place get in such a mess last night anyhow.
link to youtube.com
C’est magnifique guys, Trenet is the jinkies! afraid my linguistic skills went nae further than wid-work!
“If You Go Away” Dusty;
link to youtube.com
“Come Back” The Equals;
link to youtube.com
“Where’s your head at”?
Och, Smallaxe, I just don’t know anymore…
Thepnr: please don’t blame yourself. My Speedoes were a terrible mistake when I see yon clip.
I think a period of self-reflection is required.
@Tinto Chiel
LOL that guy was some dancer though
*En route to cocktail cabinet*
Dinna fash , Fred, this is all you need:
link to paroles.net
Going to have a margarita evening and hearken unto the music of the spheres.
C youse aa ramorra.
Fred,
I only knew French Letters.
Thepnr, you’re very kind but…
*sinks third cocktail*
Regarding FLs (afore I finally go): a friend of mine was restoring an old farm house near Bergerac. ‘Cos he tried to speak French and was Scottish, the locals liked him a lot and he invited them to the finished article after about 18 months. He was explaining how he had applied preservative to the lovely wooden floor when the room went all quiet. In French, “preservatif” means a condom. Preservative is “conservateur”.
Oops!
Laters, haters…
Cleaner wanted: Apply within.
“Welcome to the Club”
link to youtube.com
“Saturday Saturday” Indeep Bakshi, Akriti Kakkar & Badshah;
link to youtube.com
This Flashmob Is Dedicated To Women’s Power And Peace On Earth;
link to youtube.com
Bob Dylan:”Tangled up in Blue”
link to youtube.com
And Red: Not for much longer!
Smallaxe: bait not taken, I see.
Last we’ll see of that party, I fear.
Meant to say: your 8.48 was very subtle, Smallaxe. There may yet be hope.
Have placed an ad in The Lady, too:
“Housekeeper required for Highland cottage. Light duties, French lessons p.m., flexible hours, Tuesdays off.”
Apply to B. Traven, Box 69, Helsinki.
Tinto,
I’ll do what any other poacher would and change the bait. Patience is a virtue.
Nas-Patience ft. Damian Marley;
link to youtube.com
Tinto, RE. Your ad.
Gies a job, ah kin dae that!
link to youtube.com
The only Patience I ever knew certainly had no virtue. Still got the limp.
But hope springs, etc.
Tonight bring your plumber’s rocket. Knock three times and ask for Sylvester.
Can Harvey come along to the may AUOB, Smallaxe?
He likes all the colourful flags and there may still be daffodils in Kelvingrove Park.
Rocket in the pocket, Sylvester.
“Knock Three Times” Tony Orlando and Dawn;
link to youtube.com
Btw, you may have noticed that I’m about as subtle as a brick in the face.
You’re storming the M/T today: great to see you in top form.
Subtlety is often over-rated in this mad world.
Btw, had a wee party of long-tailed tits in the garden yesterday: lovely wee things, like tiny helicopters.
Time for Gaia to take charge.
Your lucky to have long-tailed Tits in your garden, Tinto. I’ve still got that big feckin’ chicken ruling the roost in my little garden. The oven beckons!
Gaia? Tellus about her.
“Hasta Siempre Comandante” Jahmila;
link to youtube.com
Gaia? Tellus about her.
Smooth, Smallaxe, very smooth. Saw what you did there.
Remember Operation Stiletto tonight.
All of you – outside and play, this place needs a clean and what have you done with those palms!
Hi, Lucia,
So pleased to see you back, the jobs yours if you still want it.
“Ain’t No Sun Since You’ve Been Gone”
link to youtube.com
Well someone’s got to do it Smallaxe now lift those feet while I vacuum under that chair – busy bee me.
Just trying out a wee test.
Test passed with merit, Lucia, I hope you’ve made your mind up.
“Windmills of your Mind”
link to youtube.com
My dear Tinto, my deepest and sincere apologies old chap but I’ve just noticed that I missed a post from your good self at 10:51 am this very morning.
I do hope that Harvey took no offence when I did not immediately reply to your missive, of course, Harvey will most certainly be more than welcome to accompany us to the AUOB rally.
I’m acutely aware of his liking for a parade and banners and suchlike and if there does happen to be a few daffs still around then I can just imagine his excitement. Please extend my warmest regards to him. I remember the last occasion when he was slightly upset and we certainly wouldn’t want to see any repeat of that behaviour.
Drone footage shows Harvey’s destruction;
link to youtube.com
Nae probs, Smallaxe. Harvey’s playing quite happily in his ball-pit at the mo. He can get a bit tetchy if he gets over-tired, as your footage shows.
I also note an enquiry from a Miss/Ms Lucy Daines regarding operational matters at the Paula Rose Memorial Gaff. Who is this charming young lady, Smallaxe?
I think in future Qs on the running of this valuable cultural resource should be passed to the Steering Committee, mon vieux.
Can’t be too careful.
BTW, the Speedoes are history…..
Who left these under the sofa?
Dear Miss Daines,
Thank you for the enquiry.
Are they animal, vegetable or mineral?
PS: the palms are out for re-potting at the moment, although normally it is best to address Operational Matters to the Steering Committee.
Let me assure you no final decisions have been made as to the internal configuration of the PRMG at this time.
Thank you for your interest.
Tinto Chiel Take those clumpy boots off forthwith.
I don’t think we’ve been introduced properly but these “clumpy boots” of which you speak are in fact the finest Persian lounging baffies.
You thought you had it easy with Paula pfft!
Paula was not only a beauty but a cultural icon. Her gaff played host to the leading figures of 21st century Scottish Thought: Brotherhood, Smallaxe, Thepnr, BDTT und so weiter, and (soggy vollyvongs apart) her parties were legendary.
And you are?
We’ve probably had this one before, but not this video.
Slade, ‘Cum On Feel The Noize’ –
link to youtube.com
Blimey!
Shut yer eyes, this could be Big Country!
Slade, ‘Run Runaway’ –
link to youtube.com
Good to see we have a new housekeeper. Stilletos on steroids no less.
That should stop you guys leaving coffee cups full of dog-ends lying around.
Oh, and don’t forget to plump up the cushions before you pass out.
Nothing is more off-putting in regard to social discourse than a too moist vol au vent!
Cushion plumping and Persian lounging baffies! I thought that I’d woke up in a different dimension.
Wit’s happinin’?
link to youtube.com
A’hm feart!
I’m just going to pretend that everything is back to normal and play some music.
Jim Croce:”You Don’t Mess Around With Jim”
link to youtube.com
Things already seem back to normal.
Just a word about River City. The set and the production values are terrific and I thought that Sandy Morton doing the gangster Billy Kennedy was the best villain I had ever seen on the screen till I see Alex Ferns doing Rick Harper at the moment. Absolutely superb.
Getting addicted. Going to have to organise a visit to the set.
Dave Mc.H.,
Hi, Dave, I’ve never seen River City but my mother in law is addicted to it. I hope you get a chance to visit the set, let us know how you get on.
“Rockabilly Blues”
link to youtube.com
Fred,
I hope this makes up for the soggy vol au vents.
Nicky Tams a Bothy Ballad;
link to youtube.com
Enjoy!
Taxi. And don’t spare the horses. link to youtube.com
As if…
link to youtube.com
Talking equine,
Jerry Reed:”Mule Skinner Blues”
link to youtube.com
link to youtube.com
Rules of the Dance;
link to youtube.com
Can you hear it?
link to youtube.com
Morning Smallaxe. Here is one from your Modern one man band link to youtube.com
this Song is based on a true story. link to youtube.com
I will bid you all a great Weekend and leave you with. Your Baby ain’t sweet like Mine. link to youtube.com
Hi, Michael,
I hope everything is good and this new year continues to be so for you, my friend.
Mark Knopfler:”Bluebird”
link to youtube.com
Also true.
Goodnight all, I leave you with,
Dennis ‘Cannonball’ Caplinger:”Money” (Pink Floyd Bluegrass Cover)
link to youtube.com
link to youtube.com
Ronnie Davis:”You’ve Got To Come Back”
link to youtube.com
link to youtube.com
Cher: “Bang Bang”
link to youtube.com
Hallooo!
Coo’s tail here =)
Hi, Ghillie,
How’s your world? Here’s mine;
link to youtube.com
Cool =)
Lived in Trinidad when I was a wee girl. The colours and quality of light take me back
It was Calypso music and steel bands in those days!
Fair warms you up on a January night!
It’s a state of mind, Ghillie, I carry great memories of Jamaica that I draw on when required.
Bob Marley’s Place, Nine Miles, Jamaica;
link to youtube.com
Rastafari!
Goodnight,
Imagination (A Caribbean Lullaby)
link to youtube.com
“Broken Down Angel” Nazareth;
link to youtube.com
Thank you Smallaxe =) xxx
Your welcome, Ghillie, have a lovely peaceful Sunday.
“Sunday Morning Love You”
link to youtube.com
@Smallaxe:”The salt is on the briar rose, The fog is in the fir trees.”
Don’t want to come over as a bit of a Grumpus but shouldn’t Miss Daines work a probationary period as “new housekeeper”? I suggest a vollyvong test, followed by a margarita tasting.
There are clear procedure for this kind of thing, you know.
Or has a fait never been more accompli?
In other words:
link to youtube.com
???????????????
@ Smallaxe, Nicky Tam has obviously been blindfolded through the cauf-hoose door & has had the horsemans-word whispered in his lug!
Tinto,
“The road has many strange happenings but none stranger than at the X ROAD”
Re, Ms Daines,
Que Sera Sera;
link to youtube.com
Agree?
Fred,
So Mote It Be!
NAZARETH: ” Bad Bad Boy ”
link to youtube.com
TC,
Tests, probationary periods?
You clearly have no idea how hard it is to get staff these days!
cearc: quite so. Still putting up with the less than scintillating performance of Treacle, the “temping” butler at Tinto Towers, but sole applicant at the time and now unsackable.
I asked him for a Gibson and he whipped out a guitar.
I think Smallaxe’s Que Sera philosophy might be the sagest route through the bristling forest of staff acquisition.
Things would have been so much simpler if Paula Rose had just come back…..
*sighs, stares out of French windows at a bleaker world*
Whatismore, despite having no references, she does have her own cap and pinny.
I, personally, am inclined to honour her with a new feather duster just for putting in an appearance.
*lightbulb moment*
But can she speak Gaelic? Sine qua non, surely?
Btw, did you know there is no word for sine qua non in Gaelic?
Tinto,
I can barely speak English for fecks sake, methinks your standards may be too high even for Mary Poppins. Let’s just get the show on the road and get back to being unnaturalies.
The sea of space is my sea;
link to youtube.com
I warned you about strange things at the X ROADS
Gone Fishing, Laters!
Chris Rea;
link to youtube.com
‘Sadeal.
Twilight zone stuff, indeed, Smallaxe.
What’s with the plastic cups and glasses – they will have to go, standards please.
If we had standards we wouldn’t be here, love.
O/T haha
Here’s an interesting Wiki link, well I thought so anyway.
link to en.wikipedia.org
Everybody knows…
link to youtube.com
Oi you lot,
Hands off Lucia she comes highly recommended by my cousin DJT from Tong. And she’s a Ginger like her sister Mary link to youtube.com
Lucia, for you: link to youtube.com
Sleep tight.
Being the Proud Pedant that I am, an’ thah’, is it
Lou-cheeya
or
Loose-eeyah
?
Asking for a friend but also, a welcome to all the new usernames ‘off-topic’.
Last minute of this one, right here…how it will feel on indy day, when it all sinks in…
Stone Roses. ‘I Am The Resurrection’ (Live) –
link to youtube.com
Prejudice. Ha ha not what you think. link to youtube.com
@M McC –
Soo-perb!
Hi, Thepnr.
What gets me about yon list of endorsements for Yes in 2014 is how relatively few writers were prepared to commit themselves. I’m pretty sure Iain Banks would have been out and proud had he not died in the spring of 2013 but where are the likes of Rankin, Mina and Brookmyre?
I attended a lecture given by the last-named last year. He talked for an hour, all very professional and with humorous antidotes no doubt, but not a mention of the principal political, cultural and economic question to face Scotland in the last 300 years. Englishman Will Self has produced more supportive and lucid thoughts on independence than any of that trio, for example (Scottish wife).
Are such writers feart of losing sales, uninterested in the question or (heavens forfend) closet Yoonsters?
Can anyone enlighten me?
@ Tinto Chiel enlighten you. Yes but only if you buy my new book. Ha ha
Tinto,
I worry more about when the W/Minster Worms will start burning books!
I prefer;
Burning Spear:”Legal Hustlers” (There’s a lot of THEM about)
link to youtube.com
@ Tinto, Val McDermott has clearly supported independence, Mina has UJ drawers!
Fred: how do you know? Have you seen them?
Michael: have title, will order
!
@Tinto Chiel
Having nothing much better to do I decided to look at the Wiki pages of all the authors that supported Yes and No in the last referendum. Some interesting facts arise.
There were 56 authors listed as supporting No, breakdown by country of birth:
England 38 (68%)
Scotland 8 (14%)
Other 10 (18%)
Of those 23 that supported a Yes vote the breakdown was:
Scotland 17 (74%)
England 4 (17%)
Other 2 (9%)
Of the 8 Scots authors that supported a NO vote, 2 were educated at Oxford, 2 at Cambridge, 1 in Birmingham, 2 in Glasgow and 1 in Edinburgh.
Those educated in Scotland were Neil Oliver who needs no introduction. Someone called Brian Lang who was a former Principle of St Andrews University though not without controversy.
“During his first year at St Andrews, Lang was accused of sexual harassment by a member of the University’s administrative staff.[11] Shortly before the start of the resulting employment tribunal, Lang made an out of court settlement with his accuser.”
The third is TV and film director Ewan Morrison, his Wiki page has an interesting snippet.
“He was originally a supporter of Scottish independence, however, he later publicly stated that he had changed his mind and voted for the union with the UK.”
Wonder if Eean has changed his mind back again yet?
Thanks for your analysis, Thepnr.
I had great respect for George Monbiot during that campaign.
I believe Ewan McGregor is now a Yes. James McAvoy, formerly a strongly dismissive No at one stage, seemed to be swithering last I heard.
But who knows what goes on in the secrecy of the voting booth? I still remember Jonathan Watson’s Only an Excuse sketch on Hogmanay 2014 when he played the Yesser with all the slogans and the pumping fist going into the booth, voting No, and then walking sheepishly out.
I know two people who admitted to doing that but then claimed they had cwied and cwied and cwied afterwards.
End of two beautiful friendships……
Don’t waste my time, suckas.
@Tinto Chiel
Another way to look at the support of Scots born authors who voiced an opinion. Just over 2/3 of them supported a YES vote.
That’s encouraging.
And anurrahing about the 2014 OAE show.
There was a sketch where the wife is gently imploring her husband (Jonathan Watson), who is sitting in front of a Christmas tree and lots of decorations, that, “It’s time to take them down now, darling.”
He eventually reluctantly agrees. Punch line is he goes up to the window and reluctantly takes down all his yes posters.
We laughed at Tinto Towers because we only took down our Yes posters fore and aft when we put up the Christmas decorations in the second week of December, mainly because, the day after the referendum, a dorkspangler of a neighbour asked me when I was taking them out of my windows because Scotland had voted No and I should get over it.
It’s a funny old game, Saint…..
Thepnr: agreed, but I just naively thought more Scottish writers would have officially endorsed the Yes campaign. After all, for all they knew, this was a “once in a generation” vote.
Lots of fence-sitters remain, it seems to me (e.g. the names I mentioned).
I freely admit, my patience is really running out. When I see and experience the commitment and enthusiasm of many Wingers who are just ordinary folk (and many of them older folk, often not in great health) I am underwhelmed by the response of a group in society who could really persuade many switherers if they came out for Yes.
FTS: RIP Cyrille Regis, a fantastic footballer and dignified fighter against the dreadful racism of Britain in the 70s.
Wotaguy!
@Tinto Chiel
I freely admit, my patience is really running out. When I see and experience the commitment and enthusiasm of many Wingers who are just ordinary folk (and many of them older folk, often not in great health) I am underwhelmed by the response of a group in society who could really persuade many switherers if they came out for Yes.
Very good point, it’s time for all of them to get off the fence and let’s have many more arguing for a positive future for an Independent Scotland.
Thepnr: after all, we’ll be old one day
.
Bet ye a nicker!
Old?
It’s worse than that!
Steve Earle:”I’ll never get out of this world alive”;
link to youtube.com
Auld mens songs, Scottish of course
link to youtube.com
I regret that I won’t be around in 100 years, to read the histories of Scotland, from the reconvening of the parliament in 1999.
It would be fascinating to read how Scotland changed, politically, particularly post 2007. The first indyref campaign would be interesting, looking at the arguments put forward by both sides.
The way the YES campaign girded its loins and kept on after the 2014 NO vote, through the 2015 GE phenomenon, then the doldrums of 2016/17, leading up to indyref2 in late 2018/early 2019, when Scots finally unchained the unicorn.
Then, as an independent sovereign nation, Scotland taking its place in the EU and the UN.
I’d read ’em…
BDTT,
I think we would all like to read that, Brian.
Matt McGinn:”Depth Of My Ego”
link to youtube.com
Thepnr: where did you get that footage of BDTT, Smallaxe, Fred and Kelly Brook?
Was probs at my Pilates class that night.
Pilates class that night you say, Tinto,
Did ye, aye?
Nothing to do with the Tag that’s on your left leg because of your association with the East Kilbride Lampost Loiterers?
Two Songs from our Cousins across the Water;
Goats don’t Shave:”The Volunteer”
link to youtube.com
Goats Don’t Shave: The Evictions
link to youtube.com
link to youtube.com
link to irishtimes.com
“Touche'”
Thanks cearc,
Tragic for her family and friends, sad for all of us who loved her voice. Irreplaceable.
The Cranberries:”Dreams”
link to youtube.com
A bright start to the Day
Bob Marley – Waiting in Vain
link to youtube.com
Scotland won’t wait in Vain!
***************************************************************
Hammers coming: It ran away from me, sorry Rev. Stu.
Two Tone!
The Selecter:”On My Radio”
link to youtube.com
C’mon peeps, it’s nearly tomorrow. Get Up!
All we are Saying!
link to youtube.com
Not much to ask for, is it?
“Get Out Of Your Lazy Bed”
link to youtube.com
This is not a drill!
Very sad news about Dolores. At least artists leave a legacy.
Thanks for the wake-up call, Smallaxe.
*adjusts Persian lounging baffies and exquisite crepe de Chine dressing-gown, lights Balkan Sobranie*
Cold and snowy where I am.
My legal representative as advised me to say that the EKLL were disbanded in 1983 and there is no record of my membership. The “tag” you refer to is in fact a Cartier ankle-bracelet given to me by a grateful French countess for services rendered in Menton in 1971.
In some circles the EKLL were regarded as a voluntary group engaged in important social outreach work.
“Get Out Of Your Lazy Bed” says Smallaxe.
Btw, just to let you aesthetes know that Bargeddie in Lanarkshire means “ridge at the lazy-bed place” in the Language of Eden.
Going out to make a snowman with Harvey now.
Snowman 1 to Snowman 2: “Can you smell carrots?”
FYI, chinas:
link to en.wikipedia.org
Tinto,
Your looking magnificent this morning, just as well the world has trendsetting icons like wot we is, intit?
John Mayer:”Your Body Is A Wonderland”
link to youtube.com
So’s mine.
Indeed, Smallaxe.
I look on us as the Jules and Jim of the Scottish fashion arena, bringing a little beauty and colour into an otherwise drab, quotidian world.
Harvey’s built an igloo and is frying mushrooms.
Got to go…..
We’re the Hans and Lotte of the haberdashery, Tinto. Tell Harvey that I think mushrooms are Magic!
Even badgers like them;
link to youtube.com
Maybe a bit too much!
link to youtube.com
C wot I mean?
C wot I mean?
link to youtube.com
“What in the World”
link to youtube.com
Eye candy for the ears, do you hear what I’m saying
Cannabis is a Gateway Drug: Proven!
link to newsthump.com
“Kaya”
link to youtube.com
Munchies Ya Bass
Hi fella’s, I haven’t had time to catch up with the O/T yet, it’s been one of those days.
Smallaxe, I was having a conversation today with my oldest grandaughter ( 18 ). She was asking what was happening on the indyref front. So, I was explaining to her that we’re a’ beginning to get geared up again, and that there was a march in Dumfries on 2nd June. ” Right granny, says she, I’m going to that March with you”, and I think probably her twin sisters ( 15 ) as well. There’ll be another one or two of us an awe, so that’s good.
I’ve been fair scunnert lately wi a’ the crap aboot the NHS Scotland, and the general bombardment of negativity, but the granweans hae fair liftit my auld spirits. Good to know that the young ones are up for the fight.
If you’re in touch with Nana, send her my regards, and I hope that she’ll be back with us soon. I miss her you know.
Bye bye, mibies catch up with you later.
What a musician Rory was, Smallaxe. So long since he died and still very difficult to believe.
Since this is the premier intellectual site for Scotland, I append this from La Grande Bellezza, an amazing film wot Mrs TC and I watched this afternoon in a very snowy Cadzow. Beautiful and strange, imo. Jeb Gambardella is a fascinating character and has my exquisite dress sense.
link to youtube.com
Get yer hanky out, Marie.
Hi Marie,
Ronnie Cameron was saying that nothing is finalised yet regarding the AUOB marches but I will let you know as soon as I know, Marie.
My grandkids are a real tonic for me also Marie, makes all the effort worth it to make sure that they raise their own kids in an independent Scotland.
Groove, Italophiles, groove:
link to youtube.com
It’s still snowing!
“Tu Vuo’ Fa’ L’Americano” Hetty & the Jazzato Band
link to youtube.com
Jeezo, Smallaxe, not only can you shake it but you can whack your reed forbye!
Epic!
Nice lallies, too, btw.
I like mine medium rare, but more from Yon Film.
link to youtube.com
Homeless People in Scotland
I noted the sterling efforts being made by well-meaning people to assist the homeless at this time.
Do any of you in this blog know of any measures that might be taken by local authorities (especially SNP controlled councils) to commandeer the many abandoned buildings/factories etc which could be temporarily or permanently converted to refuges for our less fortunate fellow countrymen and women?
I cannot understand that owners of such buildings are allowed to create eyesores in all our towns and cities.
I like mine fiddled with.
Hanine: Arabia;
link to youtube.com
Smallaxe: I know you’re multi-talented, but if that’s not you, well, all I can say is, “Wow!”
12cms of snaw here already, and more to follow.
Smooth.
@Ian F.
I was in Glasgow a lot in December and have never seen so many homeless people on the streets. I always give what I can afford, particularly to the most vulnerable-looking. The saying, “We are three pay cheques away from homelessness” should always be remembered.
The main problem is that most councils are now Yoon coalitions against the SNP.
They don’t give a Carmichael for the poor folk living in what is potentially the richest country in the EU.
Yes, we are still in the EU. And 62% means we should stay there.
Love was my Alibi link to youtube.com
Mandolin Orange-Strawberry Wine link to youtube.com
“Dragonborn” Tina Guo;
link to youtube.com
Todays WEATHER FORECAST!
Met Office;
link to youtube.com
If it’s cold pull your vest over IT!
The Weathermen:”Poison”
link to youtube.com
Evening, sophisticates.
When I drive up to Skye, I like to stop here to hug a tree, have a look at the loch, and admire this fine multi-lingual monument.
link to caledonianmercury.com
Funny thing is, Harvey says he can still hear the heads speaking Gaelic.
Silly old Harvey.
A Wee bit of Back Stage Music link to youtube.com
“Open Your Eyes” (Before You Die)
link to youtube.com
Deja Vu?
CLANNAD:”Theme from Harry’s Game”
link to youtube.com
Our idea to have a poll on the enemies of Scotland (The Parcel of Rogues) at our Burns Night on the 27th is causing a lot of interest and amusement. We have over forty potential candidates now ranging from Edward I (The Hammer of the Scots) and the Butcher Cumberland to Jackie Baillie and the Krankies with, of course, political figures and the media well represented. Anybody got any interesting possibles?
We’ll let you all know the final count.
David Bowie:”Thursday’s Child”
link to youtube.com
The Seekers:”Island Of Dreams”
link to youtube.com
link to youtube.com
10cc were so called because that is the cubic capacity of the average male member, supposedly. They were previously known as Hotlegs, a reference to the habit of lazy, drunk football fans of urinating against a neighbouring fan on the sly.
DMH, re your poll: looks like a whole day’s work to me…
I see Twatman and Bobbin were out in force hier soir on the M/T.
*Sighs*
And this still says it all about the planet-destroying, sociopathic gangsters-in-suits who are responsible for so much misery in the world:
link to youtube.com
Och, going out to hug a tree…
Afore I go:
link to youtube.com
They obvs. never flew Ryanair.
“Elm hateth man, and waiteth” is my motto for the day. Think I’ll stick to the Scots Pine.
“YES I Am”
link to youtube.com
Hug a tree for me, Tinto.
Well Off-Topic! anybody remember the red roads of Lanarkshire? great in the headlights on a wet night, alas all black noo!
link to trekearth.com
Fred,
Ye cannie be off topic on off topic,
“Anything Goes”
link to youtube.com
Anything!
Scarts Heid?
Me tae!
link to youtube.com
Folks, link to trekearth.com
Yes, I am too Smallaxe. Never heard that track before, or heard of that album. Was it their last one?
Back home now. I hugged a tree for you, old pal. It turned out it was a slender birch called Doreen.
Think Harvey’s getting jealous.
I remember, I remember, Fred. Still a few stretches of the red stuff left, usually on what are mainly old farm roads. The main road between Leadhills and Wanlockhead had a sudden change from red to tarmacadam black as you passed into Dumfriesshire.
By the way, anyone seen our new housekeeper? The pink champers hasn’t been frapped in the fridge and these blinis are stale.
cearc did say you can’t get the staff these days, tbf.
Sir Alex Douglas Home used to say the same Tinto, couldn’t get his chanty timmed for love nor money, what! & cook has been at the sherry again.
Imagine being chief chanty-timmer to His Homeness, eh, Fred? Hope he/she gets issued with thae fancy Hunter wellies.
This is simple and basic, like my porridge:
link to youtube.com
Don’t think this young shaver’s been in her for ages.
Betcha he widnae tim a chanty…..
Now, big licks from the master:
link to youtube.com
Still spanking my plank (ooh, matron!):
link to youtube.com
Have played it afore.
Will play it again.
Wotcha goin’ to do about it?
Cue song…
“Don’t think this young shaver’s been in her (sic) for ages.”
Spot the mistake.
*Takes mega-beamer*
Garde a l’eau, you two Chanty wrastlers!
There has to be a margin drawn somewhere;
link to youtube.com
Tinto, careful with that typo.
Smallaxe! Thought you were out on special border patrol fornenst Gretna.
This is simply suggestive filth:
link to youtube.com
Btw, mon vieux, did you notice Lenny K’s extraordinary pantaloons?
In magenta water-silk for our spring collection?
Would value your input going forward in terms of a response.
Honestly! The obscenest metaphor du monde…
link to youtube.com
Something has to be done, surely.
Tinto,
Special border patrol complete, I cannot give details on this open forum but rest assured mon brave, all is well!
The obscenest metaphor du monde… ya Thaaink?
link to youtube.com
link to youtube.com
Smallaxe: yes, yes, see what you mean…….
I always think, at moments like these, it’s best to fall back on the old standby: honi soit qui mal y pense.
Personally, I blame Nana for not maintaining her moral monitoring of what has always been a dodgy thread and Fred for his persistnetly suggestive-digestive behaviour.
*Attempts to change subject quickly*
Anyway, Smallaxe, those pantaloons?
“Persistnetly”?
Sorry, been doing too many fingering exercises for my Rachmaninov Piano Concerto No2 at the miners’ welfare.
Tea towel for each of you now get on with the drying up…
link to youtube.com
Oh goody, Lucia,
I love doing dishes;
link to youtube.com
Lucia! Lovely to see you again: sonically, that was a valuable addition to our modern lifestyle.
Could I tactfully direct your attention to the Champagne Situation and ongoing Blini Deficit?
And oblige TC.
Tinto,
Pantaloons?
link to youtube.com
I suggest a rethink.
Hi Lucia.
You’ve been absent for a day or three. Can I ask you to read this comment?
link to wingsoverscotland.com
I have to know how to pronounce you name as I read the comments. I would hate mispronouncing your name in my head.
“Your dad is now the pantaloon.”
That’s deep, Smallaxe, deep.
I may have to go into the west wing of Tinto Towers and muse extensively.
If I’m not back in two hours, call the mountain recue.
Still no pink champagne, btw.
Tinto,
Brekkers;
link to youtube.com
I’m ashamed of myself for playing that.
Smallaxe: you caught me mid-winceyette pyjama and Euthymol with your latest. As my pipe-smoking (Three Nuns) granny would have said: think black, burning shame upon yourself.
All I can say is: SCREENS, NURSE!
Need a lie doon…..
PS: will txt ramorra re. still and worm situation. Need to tighten supply lines
Beedeeteetee Honey – Loo Chee Ah.
@Lucia –
I’ve no idea what sort of music you like generally, but this is for you anyway.
Hope you are settling in and not letting those cheeky men annoy you.
Honda Commercial, ‘Impossible Dream’ –
link to youtube.com
Too late, Tinto,
I’ve gone and done it again,
Andy Fairweather Low:”Wide eyed and Legless”
link to youtube.com
Hi, Ian,
I like this one,
link to youtube.com
@Smallaxe –
First time I’ve seen that. Utterly soo-perb!
Ye have to wonder, sometimes, what the likes of Disney would make of what’s happening now. It’s truly astonishing.
Family History, apparently an uncle of mine only got horizontally refreshed if he agreed tae dae the dishes! True Dat!
Smallaxe do U ever come across Rory the Tory doon there?
Bowie’s last performance of ‘Heroes’:
link to youtube.com
Disney would have loved today’s technology, Ian, it’s a modern art form now.
“Art for Art’s Sake” 10cc;
link to youtube.com
Some good clips so I’m not now but nevermind
link to youtube.com
Thinking of Bowie.
So I’m a 19 year old at a disco in Dundee, I’ve chanced my mitt with a few girls and getting nowhere fast.
Time is running out as it’s coming up to the slow ones and I need to be dancing with someone before then. This song started playing and I look around in a kind of desparation.
There has to be someone to dance with me.
Two tables back was a younger girl than me that I hadn’t noticed before as I don’t think I’d saw her on the dance floor yet. She wore a green shirt with a little ladybird badge on each collar.
I was intrigued as to why she wasn’t dancing with her pals.
She had been left at the table on her own, her pals had already got up to dance and she hadn’t joined them as I think she was just too shy.
I seized the moment! My charm was too much for her without her pals to protect her and she got on the dance floor with me. Then the slow ones came on right after that song ended and we carried on dancing.
So begun a new chapter in my life almost 40 years ago as that girl became my wife, so thank you Mr Bowie
link to youtube.com
@Thepnr
Nice, damn, something in my eye.
WAKE UP!
FatBoy Slim Cornershop:”Brimful Of Asha”
link to youtube.com
Thepnr,
You picked a good one, hope to see you both again. Soon!
link to youtube.com
Thank Goad there’s no-one else here, Smallaxe. A well-wisher (Q Division) has just sent surveillance footage of our new and mysterious “housekeeper”. Don’t know how to break it to you, old fruit.
link to youtube.com
I foresee difficulties…..
Tinto,
The geese are laying eggs in flight!
“I See A Bad Moon Rising”
link to youtube.com
If I disappear for a while don’t worry. I’m just taking the Lady who lunches to… wherever she demands! ;-(
I should have left that last tin of beer in the fridge
Thepnr,
Why?
link to youtube.com
@Smallaxe
I’m impressed! Fine Scottish band, good bit of peaceful traditional folk music
I didn’t realise they had a new album, can’t wait till Father’s Day. It was someone on the Grun in 2012 posting a link to this that got me buying their albums.
link to youtube.com
Thepnr,
First prize goes to you;
link to youtube.com
‘England compensated Scotland for undertaking to share responsibility for England’s national debt by payment of an equivalent of £398,085 10 shillings.’
I understand that this amount was never fully paid.
Why do we not have grounds for default, in regard to uniting the Parliaments?
Ian, the terms of the Union have been broken in many ways over the years. In narrow legal terms, Scotland has had many reasons to say the terms of the Union have been infringed and it’s game over but you have to take people with you by achieving a majority in a referendum or, if it were SNP policy, a majority of Scottish seats in an election.
And of course, for almost all the 310 years since Union, Scotland has been represented at Westminster by PSB Unionists who didn’t want to rock the boat/gravy-train.
In tribute and to the memory of Bredren Steve “Grizzly” Nisbet
(15 March 1948 – 18 January 2018)
“Rally Round” Steel Pulse;
link to youtube.com
Rest easy with Jah mi bredda, I’n’I wi miss yuh.
This popped into my head as I was doing some necessary house-keeping…
link to youtube.com
@Loo-Che-Ah
Check out this old gadge, you’ll like it I know
link to youtube.com
Omg thepnr – I was chatting with one of the team just yesterday!
@Loo-Che-Ah
Spooky eh! I guess we’re on the same wavelength
@Smallaxe –
Sorry to hear of yer man passing, and thanks for the link. I remember seeing Steel Pulse mentioned all over the place, esp in the NME back in the day, but I never got any of their stuff. Will certainly have a look now – shocking how few views that link has had.
Hoots tae ye mister, and regards to yer better-lookin half.
Steel Pulse originated in Handsworth, Ian. They were a great live band. The man I mentioned above (Grizzly) more or less started the band and was the drummer.
Steel Pulse:”Handsworth Revolution” (Live 1979)
link to youtube.com
Miss Daines: sorry I missed you last night. Could I bring up a small issue? There’s still Christmas-themed bog roll in the downstairs shunkie and we’re now well into the New Year.
That said, I think I speak for many regulars when I say I find myself warming unexpectedly to your feminine mystique and allure…
link to youtube.com
Thanks Tinto Chiel at 4.09pm.
naw ah hivnae done ah test
@ronnie anderson –
A test for what?
Have emailed you re possible short-notice Friends of WOS social.
Last night I talked with my Glasgow cousin on Facebook as I plan to visit shortly. He has always voted SNP and voted for Independence.
He’s a Rangers die hard but until now has believed Independence for Scotland was what was best. So I was gobsmacked when he told me he wouldn’t support Independence in a second referendum.
So I asked why, his response had me scratching my head “Why swop Westminster for rule from Brussels?” Oh dear I wasn’t going to go there at that time of night.
It brought it home to me though how difficult it can be to not just win new supporters of Independence but even hang on to those we already had. I’ll be having a word with him again when I’m in the right frame of mind.
It’s ignorance that is killing us!
Hi Thepnr.
RE: your cousin’s skewed thinking. Maybe you could send him these two graphics and follow with a discussion about how the political power in Scotland is now (no change) and how things can be in the future?
link to imgur.com
link to imgur.com
@Brian Doonthetoon
OK sent him those links, I’m interested in hearing back from him
@Thepnr
I’ve seen stuff on the EU thing “Westminster – Brussels” and never know whether the poster is genuine or not in a lot of cases. So you saying that about yor cousin is very useful, thanks, as that’s someone close to you so you know it’s not bull.
But I’ve seen a bit of something similar on a defence forum about the EU. I think maybe what happens is that someone (A) cares about defence and has no opinion about the EU. But then someone (B) says thank God we’re leaving the EU otherwise the UK would be forced into the EU army. A trusts B so from not caring about the EU either way becomes very anti-EU because A does care about defence.
That EU army thing is rubbish by the way but not a lot of people know anything about it, in fact the UK opted out from the beginning even before the EU Ref – and participation in PESCO is totally voluntary – and the member state keeps control of the forces promised to it anyway.
Maybe your cousin is really strongly interested in something, just to be silly, snail racing. Someone he trusts has “found out” the EU will insist that snails wear hard hats and body armour. “But that’ll kill off the sport”. So from not really caring, he’s now totally anti-EU – from total misinformation. After all, some countries in the EU eat snails
Why are Scots so thick and stupid – oh hang on they think it’s a choice between Brussels and London FFS don’t allow them autonomy they just can’t do complex stuff.
The Independence Anthem:”Scotland Forever”
link to youtube.com
Thepnr: I got exactly the same response in May when canvassing from a woman with SNP badges on her car. She said her husband was out voting SNP but she wasn’t this time because she didn’t want to be ruled by Brussels/Merkel.
I tried all the usual arguments but you could see she was gone behind the eyes and I went on to the next house. We only scraped in with a couple of hundred votes from a previous five figure majority.
The devil has all the best tunes but Yoons are very good at manufacturing snappy factoids which their MSM rinse and repeat relentlessly.
You’ll hear a lot more of that particularly mendacious meme next year.
Hope this linky works, Jock Scot has competition.
link to soundcloud.com
BBC spooftastic –
link to youtube.com
Here’s a beezer with Peter Woods four sails to the proverbial. Ignore the vid as it doesn’t match and just distracts from the magnificent slurring.
link to youtube.com
@hackalumpoff –
Goodness gracious and michty-me, the Yoons must be spittin feathers over all this non-stop mockery. It’s as relentless as it is brilliant.
Januarys going in quick… will soon be Feb:
link to youtube.com
Smallaxe may have played this already
@ Cactus 2:18am it was me who played it. Anyway happy new year to you my friend.
Thepnr @ 22:53 (20.Jan),
This shallow equivalencing between WM and “Brussels” seems to have become a major attack point by the BtitNats now. Another unfortunate legacy of the EURef. More unfortunately, it’s even being pushed in the likes of the letters columns of The National by a small number of the usual suspects. (Whether they are even indy supporters at all is open to question.)
There still seem to be plenty of ignorant people around who just don’t realise that for us here in Scotland, the EU has been a powerful and positive counter to WM interference. Once out of the EU, we will be subject as in the past to the full icy blast of WM control. That’s what “taking back control” was all about. Everything controlled by WM, suckers.
Trite and mendacious equivalencing is just so typical of the Leaver propaganda toolkit, though. Find a simple and superficially-appealing slogan and pump it to the max. (Never overestimate the awareness of the disengaged general public.) Countering it is complex and not nearly so easy to convince.
One suitable short response though to folk like your cousin is to say: “as members of the EU in our own right, we can leave at any time we please. How easy is it though to leave WM’s deadly embrace?”
There’s a very real difference being a member of a bowling club (say) and being a guest of HM in one of her slammers.
“BtitNats”? (Freudian slip, or what…? =laugh=)
Afternoon Michael, cheers for that one 2, good shout, there’s some cracking tunes on their “A’s, B’s & Rarities” album, like ‘Steps’ along the way.
Awe ra best for 2018 tae yersel too M8.
As we’ve finally gotten around to talking about women’s bits Robert, I going to risk a bit more whitemansplaining. This will turn some cold but it seems to be a thing on the Rev.’s twitter. ‘Coincidentally’, an issue that is intrinsically bound up with the issues of political agency and self-determination.
As I’ve said, I’m probably old fashioned in thinking there are two sexes (with multiple transitional variants), and many genders, which are located in the mind. After that, it all gets very post-structuralist, though I’m sorry to be vulgar and suggest self-identification should not be allowed to undermine biological women’s rights, which are also human-rights, after all.
link to sagepub.com
link to undsoc.org
link to tandfonline.com
@ CameronB Brodie all the best for the year ahead my Friend ?
That? is meant to be a ?
Same to yourself Michael.
That? is meant to be a thumbs-up
Inspired by Cactus’s “sailing ships” over on the MT made me remember this, the first band I ever went to see at the Apollo.
“Ships in The Night” Be Bop Deluxe
link to youtube.com
Their Wiki page is very interesting “I never knew that”.
link to en.wikipedia.org
Mornin’ Cactus (and everyone else). Happy sailing.
This is night music really but so what? Nancy has the answer.
link to youtube.com
Cactus: watch your rowlocks.
I think Smallaxe is taking it easy at the moment, so hope this aids restful sleep. This remains quiet and serene amid the great currents of life (poetry):
link to youtube.com
Afternoon all ~
Did a turn last night on the stage and was thereafter presented with several glasses of whisky. Ah didnae go to the casino in the end, probably a good thing.
Sailing ships by Whitesnake:
link to youtube.com
The End of the UK is nigh.
Really, I’ve got to ask coz I’m perfluzzled.
How did Ann Widdicombe manage to become a media personality? I mean, really…
link to youtube.com
Isn’t Miss Pierson wonderful?
Doris Karloff? (Grues)
Happened to be in the capital today so nicked into Bonham’s saleroom to see the wee exhibition of the Broomhall Treasures. Mostly empire loot but Robert the Bruce’s sword was cool & a cast of his skull. The Portrait Gallery have another cast but enough culture fur wan day!
See any Butcher’s Aprons in the Far East, Fred?
Getting all my favourite Burns’ songs stacked up on the dansette for tomorrow night.
Nae Butcher’s Aprons Tinto but a crackin fishmonger aboot Broughton Street who smokes his fish in-store in a big fuck-off smoker! Ah the peat-reek! Got some strange looks on the train back!
Fred: remember to jug you kippers in boiling water for 7 mins. (off the heat). Recommended by my monger of fish.
Your peat-reek comment reminded me of the time I opened a new bottle of Ardbeg for research purposes, and poured two figures thereof. Comment from Mrs Tinto, “Is there something burning?”
Miss Daines: may I advise that you Sandy Shaw it around your dansette tomorrow? High heels can be dangerous in vigorous dancing.
Tinto, like the peaty stuff but draw the line at Ardbeg, a mortuary bucket springs to mind. Kippers OK at Ben Oovi but stinks the close oot & attracts passing cats! pissing cats even worse!
Arbroath Smokies for me. Visit Arbroath harbour and you can find a few places still smoking them the traditional way.
You walk through a wee close and there’s a kitchen of sorts where the fish brought in that day are cleaned, heads removed etc, then a bit further back you’ll see them hanging on racks over an open smokey fire.
Bought fresh like that, delicious.
No stink with the jugging process, Fred, if you cover the jug/ receptacle during the process.
I struggled manfully with the Ardbeg and found it not too bad after a couple of stiff ‘uns. Very popular in Germany, I’m told: they like smoky flavours in food and drink.
The last word on Flegs, for today?
link to youtube.com
One for Mark E Smith RIP
The Seeds – Pushin’ Too Hard
link to youtube.com
The most beautiful word, given the Martyn Bennett treatment:
link to youtube.com
Takes about a minute to warm up…..
Big concert of his work on Sat @ SECC.
@hackalumpoff: that was so funny and ridiculous at the same time. There’s a farm between Hamilton and Strathaven with a flagpole atop the old central tower of the farm-house. Its big saltire never fails to cheer me up as it lifts in the breeze.
Thepnr: I was having a football awayday in Arbroath for a cup tie in the 70s and, after some light refreshment in the Tuttie’s Neuk hostelry (needs a thread all to itself), went for a stroll before the game.
I noticed a house near Gayfield with a bell and a sign which said, “Ring for fish”. So, I rang for fish and this nice wee wummin came to the door. She had a smoke-house out the back and I managed to fulfil the smokie orders I had taken from some culinary sophisticates back in EK.
@ Tinto, I will certainly try the jugged kippers.
@ hackalumpoff, a belter kid!
And as you said Fred, it’s cod roe season.
Any recipes wot u mite have to go with a lightly frapped chardonnay? he ponced.
@ Tinto, slice your cod-roe & dip in beaten egg, cover with breadcrumbs & fry in the oil in which you’ve previously fried the Ayrshire middle to serve with the cod-roe. Chardonnay would be the very tipple.
Sounds perfect for a lazy Sunday breakfast, Fred ( Chardonnay optional).
Fanksabunch!
The Dansette is fair filling up…
link to twitter.com
Great play list Ms.Daines.
and Tam Dean Burn singing about your shoes! (I think).
There is an ignore function now lol
Save yourselves folks. Hit the big X next to my name and never again suffer my puerile diatribe – masquerading as a sensible contribution.
Who is on your iggy list so far?
Mornin’ William Wallace, ah’ve only got ma own name iggyed oot.
That should be enough. How’s yours?
New feature
Fred: CR purchased.
Ruskoline, fishmonger’s own breadcrmbs or panko?
Plz advise.
Afternoon Cactus.
No one on ignore yet but, I can think of one or two from the main topic that I would not mind skipping past. I think I will follow your lead and ignore myself
I am sick and tired of my crap. 
Tinto, Ruskoline sounds just the job. Bon appetite kid!
Mind warm the plates!
Just in case folks who lurk aboot these shores huvnae seen Rev’s comments on m/t, the ignore button disnae work and we’ve tae stoap mentionin’ it noo.
As you were
Can’t wait for breakfast tomorrow now, Fred. Have a stinking cold and Mrs Tinto has just gone to get a bottle of Crabbie’s for a whisky mac. Wot is going on? Mmmmmmm…..?
K1: I just use my scroller for TUS now, but it’s getting me down.
Managed to jouk it up till noo Tinto. The crisis seems to be over!
Reset is good.
Classic Wings Over Scotland.
The Original and Best.
Made fae Wingers.
Full sugar.
Yummy.
Early…
link to youtube.com
A button to dispense electric shocks would be cool! like they have for dugs!
Been off grid for a wee while and had new tech installed, just testing for now.
For Smallaxe.
Missing ye brother.
Easy Star All-Stars – Dub Side Of The Moon
link to youtube.com
Despite BBC and STV having nothing about Robert Burns on on Burns Night (which is celebrated all around the world) Holy Loch SNP had a great Burns Night at Dunoon Pipe Band Hall and thanks to the many who contributed and assisted. The poll we did on the Parcel of Rogues Enemies of Scotland was interesting and illuminating.
Tenth place was shared by J K Rowling and Murdo Fraser
Ninth was the Daily Record and Tony Blair
Eighth place was shared by Jackie Bird , Brian Wilson and Edward I (Hammer of the Scots),
Seventh was ” Lord” George Robertson
Sixth was the Butcher Cumberland
In fifth place were Fluffy Mundell and the Daily Mail
Fourth – Ruth Davidson and the Orange Order
Third went to Gordon Brown
Second place was for Theresa May
But the clear winner in first place by a long way was the BBC.
What Ian said:
link to youtube.com
@Historywoman
It’s quite honestly chilling that you were allowed anywhere near impressionable students, given the apparent naivety of your world-view and your support for ‘British nationalism’, the contemporary form of which is an expansionist form of increasingly authoritarian, populist, English nationalism. You are aware that the majority of Scots voted to stay in the EU?
link to psychologytoday.com
link to theriskyshift.com
link to un.org
Anent the capitol. Jakey Rowling now has a pub named in her honour!
@Jamie Green MSP
Do you understand what philosophy your party espouses? Do you support the principle of universal human rights? Thomas Carlyle one of your heroes?
link to digitalcommons.colby.edu
link to thegreatthinkers.org
link to scholarsarchive.byu.edu
*skips about clearing up*
link to youtube.com
I should probably point out that “Nationalism Rises: Survival, the State, and War”, is from the neo-classical Realist perspective, which differs from Critical Realism, focusing as it does on foreign policy analysis, not ontology, causation, structure, persons, etc.
Different philosophical perspectives view nationalism in their own particular way. Just in case anyone needed clarification.
Re. Transgender Equality.
link to stephaniedaviesarai.com
Is sex a biological construct or a social construct? How can this be expected to impact on the social empowerment and human rights of ‘women-born women’? Can you take a thing too far?
link to communication.oxfordre.com (full article)
While I’m at it.
link to repository.law.miami.edu
Self-Determination
link to oxfordbibliographies.com
RE-THINKING SELF-DETERMINATION: A CRITICAL ANALYSIS OF CURRENT INTERNATIONAL LAW THEORIES
link to surface.syr.edu
Fancy some shoogly sub-Hammer 60s Sci-Fi with faces you know but names you don’t?
Then you need this:
link to youtube.com
Fred: where is this Jaikie R pub in Embra? Dying to know so I can avoid it.
Tinto, it’s aboot Broughton Street, where that cool fishmonger’s is. How did the cod-roe go doon kid?
I know Broughton Street well, Fred
I deny any knowledge of Danube Street, of course.
CR given the Ruskoline treatment and it was orgasmatronic, thanks. Where has it been all my life?
Hope the season isn’t too short. I was talking to one of our most famous and irreplaceable Wingers this morning who said a favourite breakfast was “naked” sliced CR, done in a little butter with fried potatoes.
Tinto…Fred,
Forget 60s Sci-Fi, cod roe and another pub tae get yersels expelliarsed oot ae. Drone me doon some spiced Raw Beef Ham an’ naebdy’l get hurt.
Here’s a wee pal o’ mine tae sing ye’s a song,
link to youtube.com
Lovely n’ clean in here, intit?
Smallaxe! Been away on one of your missions again? Thought you’d been grabbed by The Fuzz or summink.
Prepare for drone arrival. Leave landing light on back green. ETA 2340. Managed to secure goods from the wee dairy in Abercrombie St.
Miss Daines will be pleased you noticed her efforts. She’s a bit enigmatic but her raffia work is magnificent. She’s done a giant Dusty Springfield beside the smoke house.
Which is nice.
twitter.com/YesRutherglen/status/958057333719957504
Hi folks, hope everyone’s well – haven’t been on for ages, it’s been another busy month
Wanted to post this for anyone that isn’t on twitter or facebook in case they miss it – I’m going, and if there’s anyone in the area that can’t make the event but fancies meeting up for a drink afterwards then give me a shout!
(Anyone that’s on the main threads just now please feel free to mention the event, ta)
Tinto,
No mission, nothing so exciting I’m afraid. My dear wife and I have been at Loggerheids for a while, it does her the world of good to clench her face now and again, who am I to argue?
I’ve had a Pavlovian response to your news of the drone arrival, I’m totally splashing in anticipation.
“Caught by the Fuzz”
link to youtube.com
@Smallaxe
Good to see you back again. Here’s a wee tune for you and Sybil.
link to youtube.com
I thought it was strange there were no impact assesments. Still, here’s one to celebrate our full-English, post-industrial, Brexetness. God bless English cultural nationalism.
link to oxfordhandbooks.com
link to scielo.mec.pt
link to law.yale.edu
Meanwhile over on the MT the lunatics have taken over the asylum.
Good to see you Smallaxe.
Sugar Minott – Hard Time Pressure
link to youtube.com
Thepnr
I’ve not had the best of days Alex, so I think that’s me for the night. Don’t be tempted now.
Morning, sophisticates.
Snowing where I am, but I’m knitting mittens for my long-tailed tits, so alles in ordnung.
This is passing strange but is one of Harvey’s favourites:
link to youtube.com
Morning, Tinto,
Not snowing here and I’m knitting tits for my long-tailed mittens!
Who’s Witch?
link to youtube.com
Snow’s getting thicker here Smallaxe but I have to go out for various gentleman’s requisites. Taking my snow shovel and an emergency penguin. I may be some time.
Think I preferred your version of that one.
Now, these girls ARE bad:
link to youtube.com
Laters, haters (or mibbes not).
Tinto,
That must be Yoon snow, it doesn’t come much thicker than that, why are you taking an emergency biscuit with you?
Bad girls, I know what you mean, some of them look like angels but they’re;
“The Devil in Disguise”
link to youtube.com
***************************************************************
Thepnr and CameronB, sorry I missed you both last night, thanks for the music, guys.
Thatsmebackhamenoo.
Wild weather here: the snow stopped and then the big hailstones started, then they began to lie in drifts, and now the snow is back on and the sky is completely white.
Must be my Aunty Biotics ‘cos when I was passing Iceland a pink polar bear started to wink and sing this to me:
link to youtube.com
Snaw no lyin in Glesga. Wid ye believe that Laphroaig which is £26 in Asda, is £37 for the same stuff in the Co-op? silly not to stock up really!
Bare-nakit cod-roe doesn’t float ma boat I’m afraid but raw haddie-roes fried in lashings of butter, with a good squeeze of lemon & chopped parsley, go down well with a chilled Muscadet!
Tinto,
YerauntiebioticsmyauntiefanniePhoneadoctorquick, pink polar bears is it? You know the drill;
link to youtube.com
The price of food these days is getting ridiculous, Fred. £26? for
A Bottle of Whisky;
link to youtube.com
Treasure hunt…
See if you can find a recent Wings tweet from the following words:
1) expression.
2) celebrate.
3) folk songs
4) traditions and cultures.
Pay focus to the Rev’s header.
As we approach my annual greet on the anniversary of the death of Buddy Holly I love this little piece which is taken from a tape in Buddy’s apartment. It is Buddy alone with his guitar working on a new song. One verse only – “Learning the Game” but it would have been massive. I wrote another couple of verse for it a few years ago and Gaberlunzie put it on one of their albums.
link to youtube.com
It has been recorded by many artists since, even with only one verse.
Wings retweet:
link to twitter.com
Compare with:
Mapping Scotland’s Waters:
link to philsteinberg.wordpress.com
Excellent article Cactus.
May I be SO bold as to suggest our next & first Wings ’18 day/night out…?
Saturday the 3rd of February 2018.
Saturday the 10th of February 2018.
Saturday the 17th of February 2018.
Saturday the 24th of February 2018 AD.
Choose.
ir2
Or even…
Saturday the 3rd of March ’18.
Saturday the 10th of March ’18.
Saturday the 17th of March ’18.
Saturday the 24th of March ’18.
Saturday the 31st of March ’18.
De ja vous nos to you.
Saturday, April 18..
WOS Helensburgh…
+yir2
Goats Don’t Shave:”The Glasgow Bus”
link to youtube.com
Morning, aesthetes. Lovely frosty morning. Rosy-fingered dawn has pure broke over the Lanarkshire bings.
Is that why goats have beards, ‘cos they don’t shave, Smallaxe?
Have you seen the lava lamp? Someb’dy moved it? It used to be on the Ladies’ Powder Room, beside the Davy Lamps.
@ Smallaxe, anent losing the fight with the bottle, best to try for a draw!
Beautiful morning & a cool moon last night. With all these goats it’ll be the apron’s next?
Tinto,
Goats are too feart to shave (see below).
The lava lamp was lingering in the ladies lavvy last time I looked, the ladies like to light the lava lamp. I hope some poncy punter hasn’t pilfered or purloined the pigging thing.
Are those sensible Davy Lamps btw?
link to youtube.com
These goats are easily nadgered, Tinto
……………………………………………….
Fred,
A draw? everybody likes a winner;
Goats Don’t Shave: “The Little King” (Benny Lynch)
Was that Butchers Aprons you were referring to?
# Manky Mates
Those goats are a pushover, Smallaxe. Unfortunately, it’s too early in the season for me to get my nadgering graith oot.
My Dear Old Dad used to speak in awe of Benny Lynch who, when he was on his sad downward trajectory, would sometimes appear for a drink at The Torrance Hotel in EK, when it was still a wee village. I think everyone who knew him found him a lovable wee guy (unlees you had to fight him).
“I have squandered my resistance
For a pocketful of mumbles,
Such are promises.”
link to youtube.com
Patience, Tinto,
The nadgering season matters not my dear chap, those goats behave like that in all seasons, use the time to stock up on Dettol and purchase a new wire brush in readiness for the coming season.
Benny Lynch was a fine boxer but you don’t understand my frustration;
link to youtube.com
So You Wanna Be A Boxer?
link to youtube.com
April 7 is Glenrothes WoS knees-up
Could certainly do with something before then. Inverness would be nice but I have no idea where. If anyone has Tartanpigsy’s contact he would probably know. I’ll have a think.
re. The Lava Lamp, Ms. Daines was scrounging fresh batteries the other day, so I guess she borrowed it for her naked, hilltop, full-moon dance.
Sublime clips, Smallaxe, sublime.
“I guess she borrowed it for her naked, hilltop, full-moon dance.”
Whit? Surely not? She seemed such a nice girl, too.
Don’t know how to break it to Ian B: it was his favourite object in the PRMG (after the plant pot).
cearc,
Thanks for reminding me and putting our minds to rest about the Lava Lamp, I’d forgotten that the festival of Imbolc has commenced. Ms.Daines will be worshipping the goddess, Brigid. Now is a time of renewal and of clearing the mind.
Imbolc: “Ode to Brigid”
link to youtube.com
As Above and so Below
I’m not fussed if I’m Scottish, English or Polynesian but I do hope to be treated ethically by the social institutions that shape my life. The British state and the BritNat identity deny Scots effective political agency, harming the Scottish economy and psyche. British nationalism places Scots in a similar position to women before emancipation and universal suffrage. British nationalism is intrinsically illiberal in nature.
The Ex – The Art of Losing
link to youtube.com
Tinto.
Let’s leave the lovely lad Ian to lament about the Lava Lamp, at least let’s leave it a little longer before letting loose with the truth, a little longer will be long enough.LoL
He loves excessive alliteration, I’m told;
link to youtube.com
All true, Smallaxe. I believe Paula Rose used to give him a real tongue-lashing.
Do you really think she’s gone for ever, like wot the Great Library at Alexandria is?
*Muses*
Many of the books from Alexandria were taken and re-appeared in other places as new libraries.
Tinto…cearc,
I hope nobody finds out about the books from the Alexandrian Library that were passed down to me through the family, how in the name of Zeus would I find the money to pay the fine?
I don’t think she’s gone forever, she would have given us all a;
Kiss:”Forever”
link to youtube.com
When the knowledge and history of The Great Library of Alexandria were all but lost to us our southern neighbours very kindly re-wrote it all for us. Phew, lucky, or what!
link to youtube.com
What?
cearc says:
“Many of the books from Alexandria were taken and re-appeared in other places as new libraries.”
That explains my well-thumbed copy of “Lady Cynthia Sins Again”, a novel full of plangent symbolism and a limpid meditation on human longing.
I’ve still got a copy of “Norton’s Star Atlas” from EK public library c. 1969. My dad paid for a replacement copy ‘cos his horse had just come in (obvs not Shergar).
I tried a Voyage to Arcturus but ended up at Crindledyke.
Tinto,
Any danger of you loaning me your copy of “Lady Cynthia Sins Again”? I love a good novel full of plangent symbolism and a limpid meditation on human longing.
One little thing does intrigue me though, I must ask, if your dads’ horse had just come in, so enabling him to purchase you a replacement copy of “Norton’s Star Atlas”, where did the horse just come in from? Was it standing on street corners swinging it’s nosebag and wearing mascara? Did it have a part-time job with the ragman/coalman or was it on benefits?
I do know it must never have let you down;
link to youtube.com
Tinto,
I forgot this bit.
“I tried a Voyage to Arcturus but ended up at Crindledyke”.
Alpha Boo Hoo!
link to youtube.com
Funny thing is, Smallaxe old fruit, my copy of “LCSA” seems to have gone missing, along with all my B. Traven novels. I’ve tried Treacle the butler’s room but zilch. It’s all a bit of a mystery, really.
When I said his horse “just come in”, I meant in the 3.40 at Haydock. It wasn’t something you’d find down Anderston at two in the morning, y’know. My dad would never have backed that kind of horse, I assure you.
And personally, I think some people get too sniffy about mascara. It can often bring out the brooding, azure majesty of a pair of peepers (peotry).
Ah, Rosemary, “You with the stars in your eyes” Clooney.
I once told a young lady her eyes were like deep pools of cerulean starlight amid a cloudless, crystalline sky.
She told me to naff off, Poindexter.
The Laydees, eh?
Mystery solved, Tinto,
Treacle the butler? AKA Fingers Findlay/Freddy the Fly/ The Bootleg Batman! Call a constable immediately and get the bugger arrested!
I’m still a teeny wee bit puzzled about the horse. When you say “When I said his horse “just come in”, I meant in the 3.40 at Haydock”. Do you mean it arrived in the 3.40 bus or train?
link to youtube.com
Agree totally re. mascara,(Peotry?)
I had a well-thumbed copy of “Lady Cynthia Does it for Dabbities!” once upon a time!
The Laydees right enough, Tinto, I know exactly what that kind of rejection can do to a man, you’ve told me often enough.
My rejections were many, I didn’t get my first kiss until 1972, it was just after I had discarded my favourite grey balaclava that my luck in the romantic rituals of reproduction seemed to take a turn for the better. I’ll never forget big Senga Breen, the tattoo she gave me on that sultry evening will remain with me forever.
Her granddaughter is like a younger, slimmer image;
link to youtube.com
Fred,
‘Dabbities’
You telling me Treacle was bent, Smallaxe?
*Muses*
That explains the eventual lack of silver coffee spoons, I suppose.
And Fred, what are these “dabbities” of which you speak?
Btw: is Senga Breen an anagram?
These are deep waters, guys…..
Senga Breen is an anagram of Green Beans, Tinto, all I have now are;
“Green Onions”
link to youtube.com
Tears? It must be the onions. Sob!
So a girl whose name is an anagram of Green Beans gave you a tattoo “on a sultry evening”?
Is “gave you a tattoo” a metaphor for dabbities, then? Notice Fred’s gone all quiet.
Me noives are all shot. Life’s so confusing.
Moff tae ma pit.
Tinto,
I’ll put you out of your misery;
Dabbity, a transfer, that is a design printed on glossy paper that when licked and applied to the back of a child’s hand will leave an image: ‘Call that a tattoo? Ah’ve seen better dabbities.
Night Night.
@Smallaxe
This is for you. A must watch.
link to youtube.com
And now to calm you down
link to youtube.com
Thepnr,
Memories…from Grosvenor Sq. to St. Thomas Hospital in one easy move. Worth every minute.
link to youtube.com
Main Thread, it’s full of them!
link to youtube.com
Prepare to repel boarders.
@Smallaxe
Loved it.
Our future, Scotland’s future belongs to our youth, more than 64% of 16 to 24 year olds support a Yes vote.
We need to motivate our youngsters to talk to their grannies and granda’s. Make the older folk realise that the direction Scotland chooses should be their grandchildren’s choice.
I think that can win us Independence, getting the youth more involved actively, that should be our goal before IR2.
@Smallaxe
Close the door right enough, some though appear to be just to thick to see that. Halfwits.
Does my nut in so will be spending more time here than there.
MT kind of reminds me of Edward Lear:
There was an old person of Paxo
Which complained when the fleas bit his back so,
But they gave him a chair
And impelled him to swear,
Which relieved that old person of Paxo.
@yesindyref2
Yes, have tried that. Used many ways of getting rid of the trolls over the years. These two though ain’t gonig anywhere until they are TOTALLY ignored and end up talking to themselves like they were the other day.
I can’t be arsed with this troll business anymore, Wings should be a place for at least semi sensible discussion but that proves to be impossible when they grab the thread,
Mt Peffers and hhedy don’t help in the slightest, no one who replies to them does, they only make things worse. So fuck it I’lll not be back on the MT until they are gone or as a minimum totally ignored by everyone except new posters.
By the way, did I mention I was pissed off at this?
Thepnr,
Correct, that 64% of young people would make a bigger difference if they would also take to the streets in *Peaceful* demonstration and maybe even organise a ‘Free in the Park’ gig that will attract even the No voters.
“You’re the Voice” John Farnham;
link to youtube.com
Music for the M/T;
link to youtube.com
@Thepnr
Thinking of packing it in myself. There’s a couple or more have posted they don’t bother reading in the evening because of the trolls, which wastes the evening posts – and night ones. Night’s the time I do a bit of leisurely research, do a couple posts and I doubt if even a couple of people read them any more. Petra does a summation, and you used to get some interesting discussions in the evening.
And there are a lot of names have disappeared, just the occasional post. Opening hours seem to be around 8 am to 5 pm on wings, after that it’s trollfest.
The trolls are killing off btl, shame the power that be doesn’t recognise that.
Mornin’ all.
Aweright Ian Brotherhood ~
Hoping to make it along to the protest later today.
What time be the rendezvous at RES?
Back in a bit.
Cheers.
To those!
And now each night, and morn ’til noon,
Over Wings still roams the Yoon;
And above the wail of the Chimp and Snipe
You may hear the squeak of his plaintive pipe
Lonely and wild, all night he goes,—
The Yoon with a luminous Nose!
Edward Lear & Me
Music’s always the answer and I’ve been trying to find a suitable one, the only thing I can think of is this one!
link to youtube.com
or this
link to youtube.com
Sorted.
Here and hear a question ot’ers:
See how when the 21st century People of Scotland choose to become a normal independent country once again…
Do you think the 20th century unionist politicians will physically weep for the loss of THEIR union, or will they react in a different way?
Who gives a shit, we’ll be hosting the biggest ever 21st century iParty this planet has ever seen.
Hey Ghillie
How you doin’ lovely lady.
Xx.
Dynamix n that ower here.
“He He” (said Michael Jackson)
Comedy is the answer to the question and the cure.
Scotland is a FUCKING excellent country.
Aweright @Bullseye ~
They WON the turquoise car.
Yes!
Upload and update complete.
@Cactus –
Thepnr & I should be at The Social, Exchange Sq, about fiveish.
Great if you can make it!
Ian,
I hope you have a note from a responsible person explaining your absence!
George Jones:”It’s Finally Friday”;
link to youtube.com
Morning, malcontents.
Right, Smallaxe, so dabbities were transfers, like the ones you got with Bazooka Joe bubble gum?
The word “Dabbity” does not seem to me to have reached the high tundra of East Kilbride, possible because Gaelic lingered there longer than the lovely lava lamp in the lissom-ladies’ loo.
He’s got it, By Jove, he’s got it!
link to youtube.com
Let’s leave the Lava Lamp saga lying a little longer.I don’t think Ian has noticed.
Think those Bazooka Joe boys will stick around, Smallaxe?
Right, D&P day at Tinto Towers or SWMBO will not be happy.
It’s tough being a domestic goddess.
Tough?
Higella…The Movie;
link to youtube.com
@Smallaxe –
You’d be surprised how little I notice…but I *do* know what a dabbity is.
Now if the Bazooka Joe Boys could fit in Dabbity with Bee Baw Babbity that would really boost bubble-gum sales hereaboots!
@ Tinto, you’re worse than your sister Erchie! Don’t ask.
Tricia Marwick posts on the scandalous treatment of the Catalan officials & says that it could never happen here! Imagine some goons locking Oor Tricia up, God help them!
*Puts lava lamp back in place, hopes no-one noticed its absence – what are folk talking about – leaves this*…
link to en.wikipedia.org
Ian,
Enjoy a nice night of nobbling nutters, no one knows nearly as much as me how a nice night of nobbling nutters numbs the noggin.
Dab a dozen dabbities on as a disguise.
I will of course be playing an hour of Buddy Holly songs by many different artists on my online Not Fade Away Show on Argyll Independent Radio from 8pm tonight. Tomorrow is the 59th anniversary of me walking to Holyrood School in shock and distress.
Bazooka Joe:”Sugar Island”
link to youtube.com
I’m forever blowing bubbles.
Dave McEwan Hill,
Just to get us in the mood.
Buddy Holly:
“Not Fade Away”
link to youtube.com
“Everyday”
link to youtube.com
“Rave On”
link to youtube.com
Buddy’s music didn’t die.
Thepnr @ 00:40,
I very much share your concerns, but earnestly hope that you and indyref2 don’t “abandon ship”. I’m sure that I’m by no means alone in finding your contributions invariably positive and stimulating, even on the odd occasion when I don’t entirely agree.
Getting rid of folk like you would be exactly what the rude interlopers want. We have to stick this one out.
Fred,
I left this out from my 11:30 am post yesterday.
link to youtube.com
My sister Erchie’s been through a lot recently, Fred.
This is my Auntie Bob, on the job:
link to youtube.com
Families, eh?
Some good stuff Smallaxe, the sun’s shining & the daffy’s are coming up kid!
@Smallaxe –
Cheers for the Goats Don’t Shave track, great stuff, never heard that before. I’ll be whistling that for the rest of the day.
Have the John Burrowes book about Lynch, it’s brilliant, although it’s more about social history than boxing, has some great descriptions of life in the Gorbals at start of 20th C, including the last UK outbreak of bubonic plague!
Ian, I think the plague came in on a ship, killed a few peeps, presumably those stricken were sent to the Belvedere Hospital or quarantined at Robroyston Hospital. All the best with tonight’s protest.
Haud a dod: lovely lava lamp back!
But where’s the Ashworth lamp?
Bugger!
link to youtube.com
Fancy some sleaze and great slide guitar?
link to youtube.com
Of course you do…..
@RJS
Thanks. I’ll probably carry on (as I did today), but it is discourageing. Today has been a blessed relief so far without the witterings of coco the clown, long may that continue!
For anyone who missed Dave McEwan Hill’s tribute to Buddy Holly on Argyll Independent Radio tonight, enjoy these last two tracks.
Matchbox:”Love’s Made A Fool Of You;
link to youtube.com
Tanya Tucker:”Not Fade Away”
link to youtube.com
Thanks Dave, great programme.
Tinto, “Worse than yer sister Erchie!” was a fave’ of a Gourock mate. I presume she was a local worthy? “Aw tae the wan side like Gourock!”
Maybe she brushed up against The Gantocks, Fred. You can never be too careful in them waters, imo…
I’m no’ sae Garngad, thanks for asking.
Dreich and dowie here where I am, so going to the fitba’ for some spiritual uplift.
Morning one and all. Tinto, I hope Harvey is well this fine morning, sun is shining here, cauld mind, but the sun’s oot.
I have to agree with Thepnr and yesindyref2 aboot what’s going on on the MT. I really wish that folk, who should know better would just ignore the Rock & Coco show. Now I see there appears to anither yin or twa crawlin oot the widwork. You cannot, debate,educate, or indeed, get any sense oot o’ these folk. That’s no whit they’re there for. All it’s doing is pissing aff the rest o’ us. I think that they hope to chase us away by boring us to death. Well I’ve got news for them, it ain’t gonna work. We’re here for the long haul.
Thing bubbling along nicely with good old Brexit, Rees Mogg get a hard time in Bristol last night. Tories doing a great job of breaking up their ” Precious Union”. Time for this.
link to youtube.com
Morning, Marie. Amen to your second paragraph. We’ve reached a new low on the M/T when the same ‘bot starts talking to himself using different names.
Harvey’s actually in the huff ‘cos I wouldn’t take him to see the SiU gargoyles last night. He’s standing under the birch tree making faces at the redpolls.
Meant to play this yesterday: takes me back to the days when I was young and beautiful.
Funny, sad, wistful and banging at the same time, just like my sock drawer.
link to youtube.com
Good afternoon, Peeps’
Tinto being;
“Young and Beautiful”
link to youtube.com
Co-Joined?
“Rococo”
link to youtube.com
“They’re moving towards you with their colours all the same
They want to own you but they don’t know what game”
If you Brexit you’ve Bought it! #fool in a China shop