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If you want another, say you need another

Posted on August 15, 2015 by


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    1. 15 08 15 12:44

      If you want another, say you need another | Speymouth

    66 to “If you want another, say you need another”

    1. Rev. Stuart Campbell says:

      This is the source of the headline, btw:

    2. Fiona says:


      Well I think that about wraps it up for SLAB

    3. Grouse Beater says:


      Still laughing …

      Try restarting that one, Jeremy!

    4. Capella says:

      What a lucky girl Kezia is. And to think, only last year she might have become a Radio Scotland presenter.

    5. handclapping says:

      Love it. LOL

    6. Dr Ew says:

      Goes well with the Arfur Daley promises, Chris.

    7. Onwards says:

      lol, its also got a special remote control feature.

    8. Lollysmum says:

      Ooh Chris-that is so excellent & truthful. I like it immensely 🙂

    9. Stevie boy says:

      Yip.. Slab’s next car crash coming up!
      Bye bye for good. RIP!!

    10. JaMur says:

      What a disaster for slabnobb.
      Aww the best kezia but this is a one way ticket to the job center.
      Don’t be late or you won’t eat for three months.
      Better together.

    11. Angry Weegie says:

      Spot on and couldn’t be more up to date. I wonder if Kez passed that course in car mechanics.

    12. starlaw says:

      And the good news is .. the air bag works!

    13. Johnny says:

      This is probably my favourite cartoon of Chris’. Big smile on my face. Well done, sir!

    14. John Walsh says:

      Hope it’s a loaner, with head office in London responsible for any inevitable crashes the new driver with new PR softened apologietic excuses will cause.

    15. call me dave says:

      Excellent again all distilled into that cartoon.

      Rowley is deputy to the new sheriff with the tin star and I can’t help thinking that there is a Gordon still pulling the strings somewhere.

      Baker and Matheson rejected and ‘what’s name’ cuffed failing to get even 30%.

      Was listening for the result in the car on radio Scotland and heard the deputy leadership news first. They broke off to allow Shereen Nanjiani to blether, as usual, about last weeks news and then….

      Amateurishly, as usual, missed the leadership result only catching ‘what’s his names’ vote… Geez!

      Good old BBC Auntie Scotland. Oh – Anti = Auntie… 🙂

    16. cearc says:

      Spot on.

    17. unchillfiltered says:

      Another stepping stone appears. Thanks Slab.

    18. Gavin says:

      Simply brilliant.

      These should be published in the National. No offence to Greg Moodie but these cartoons are far superior and really grab your attention.

      Keep them coming.

    19. thedogphilosopher says:

      Love the expression on the car’s face!

    20. Helena Brown says:

      Blooming heck that encapsulates it all, excellent Cartoon Chris.

    21. Excellent Chris;

      Pimp my ride.

      On second thoughts…

    22. kangaroo says:

      Murph must have been driving with blair as front seat passenger. Corbyn as back seat driver caused the stramash.

    23. jimnarlene says:

      I genuinely, laughed out loud.

    24. Croompenstein says:

      Brill Chris, has Michelle Mone been at that car too 🙂

    25. theMadMurph says:

      “Pulls to the right a bit”


    26. R-type Grunt says:

      Brilliant CARtoon Chris! Your best yet in my opinion.

      Please God someone has some old screenshots of FiFi’s work..

    27. Auld Rock says:

      Correct me if I’m wrong but have there not been 7 previous owners?

      Auld Rock

    28. Dorothy Devine says:

      So damned clever!

    29. Sinky says:

      Kezia Dugdale has zilch real world job experience outside student politics, has never won an election, has never introduced any legislation but was a regular Scotsman online troll whilst working for her political mentor Lord Foulkes.

      Was Campaigns and Welfare Adviser for Edinburgh University Students’ Association and a Public Affairs Officer at the National Union of Students Scotland.

      After failing to get a job as parliamentary research assistant with the SNP she joined the Labour Party and worked from 2007 to 2011 for the Labour Lothians Regional MSP George Foulkes, Baron Foulkes of Cumnock as his office manager and political adviser.

      In 2011, she got into the Scottish Parliament, as Scottish Labour’s second placed candidate on their list for the Lothian Region.

    30. Auld Rock says:

      Anybody help, I’ve been trying to find out how many votes each of them got instead of percentages. As it stands it could mean total vote was Kezey – 36 votes or 72%, Kenny – 14 votes or 28%. Frightened to let us all into how few actual members they really have? Also does anyone know, can Affiliates vote twice?

      Auld Rock

    31. Ken MacColl says:

      Great cartoon but don’t knock Moodie. What is wrong with two effective political cartoonists.

      Predictably, the BBC Scotland made a complete Horlicks of reporting the poll results. No surprise there but it was refreshing to be given-yet again- expert political insight from serial unsuccessful LibDem candidate Christine Jardine.
      One might think that with 56 MPs and a majority of MSPs the we might hear a wee bit more from the party that enjoys overwhelming support across Scotland. Successful by election results on Thursday in Falkirk and Wishaw are sidelined. Complaint is futile. Can hardly wait to hear what Katy Grant has to say tomorrow!

    32. msean says:

      She might do her own thing and be a good leader,have to wait and see. Now that she isn’t towing another scottish leaders line it might be different,but I doubt it. Still an accounting unit and will do as instructed as normal from London, sadly.

      If we were an independent Scotland,and the next Scottish elections were for the first scottish prime minister… here’s what you could have won

    33. call me dave says:

      Spooky as I was listening to Bridge over troubled waters when I read this.

      When you’re down and out
      When you’re on the street
      When evening falls so hard
      I will comfort you

      Aye right!

    34. R-type Grunt says:

      @ Capella

      She might still.

      @ Auld Rock

      Apparently FiFi won the gameshow with an astonishing 5,217 votes!

      I think there’s more SNP members in my local branch.


    35. Neil H says:

      Nice analogy! If only there was some kind of ‘Start-up Czar’ to give her a hand.

    36. Bob Mack says:

      Sorry Chris,but sentiment got the better of you.!
      The car should have been “Royal true blue” to match Labours aspirations.

    37. heedtracker says:

      I like car diy so I offer to fix up that SLab clown car so they can all head off out of Scotland, once and for all.

      I’ll even lend my trailer, so they can cart off the whole UKOK BBC media creepshow too.

    38. The Man in the Jar says:

      If SLab was a car it would have more rattles than Mothercare!

    39. Robert Peffers says:

      @Auld Rock says: 15 August, 2015 at 12:19 pm::

      “Correct me if I’m wrong but have there not been 7 previous owners?”

      Nah! Auld Rock, there were seven leaders but only five owned the car. One former leader took taxis everywhere and charged it to expenses. Another had the official council, chauffeur driven car.

      I have to agree that the Chris Cairn’s cartoons just get better and better and I have no doubt that he has it right this time too. Mind you it wouldn’t have mattered which candidate won the election – it was always going to be a car-crash.

      It really is amazing that so many of the Red Tories have not grasped the so obvious point that the Labour voting public are overwhelmingly going for the left-winger, Corbyn yet these numpties think that it means Labour cannot be elected unless they are right wing. It has been pointed out for years that if people want a Tory government they will vote for the real deal and not the ersatz red version.

    40. DerekM says:

      LMAO brilliant Chris hehe

      now Kez remember and clean out Grays subway wrappers,jola`s virus collection and Jims glue bags,and what ever you do dont open the boot wee Wendy is in there with the knives still stuck in her back.

    41. call me dave says:

      @Robert Peffers says:
      15 August, 2015 at 12:59 pm
      @Auld Rock says: 15 August, 2015 at 12:19 pm::

      “Correct me if I’m wrong but have there not been 7 previous owners?”

      Hootsman says 8. Answers on a postcard…

      We’re off out. She’s taking me to a care home ‘open day’ Hmm!

      It was the piece of rope and the eye mask thingy she popped in her handbag that got me thinking.

      Might post later …or not? 🙁

    42. ArtyHetty says:

      Fabtastic image, laughed out loud, thanks.

      The music vid is fab too, I love the visuals. Song good too. And it’s sunny outside, so a good Saturday so far,

      Have a good weekend all.

    43. Brian Powell says:

      So, Kezia won with 5,217 votes. Craig Murray was informed.

    44. Dr Jim says:

      All these Labour types getting excited about Corbyn and I hate to burst their wee bubble, well I don’t, but however

      Jeremy, fine chap though he may be,in their eyes, is the same age as me 66years, now even if the Labour Party allow him to win he’ll be 70years by the time the next election comes around, and I don’t know about anybody else but I’m pretty fit, but Mr Corbyn, not so much, so the rigours of office the in fighting of his own party and trying to win a general election at that age sounds like heavy going to me

      Plus, all of his younger support? are they going to see Grandad Corbyn as the future, I kinda don’t see that

      So, does that not mean they’re going to end up with Burnham or Cooper anyway

    45. Richardinho says:

      The car still has more seats than Scottish labour.

    46. Deontas says:


      Well done.

    47. Lesley-Anne says:

      Brillant … as always Chris. 😀

      Is it true that the Branch office have replaced their anthem, something about flying red flags, with this?

    48. heedtracker says:

      Courier warm welcome to all new SLab leaders, fresh faces for a new golden age of SLabour’s reign over us happy and glorious. See if you can spot anything meaningful in Leader Dugdale waffle

      Around 21,000 party members and supporters were eligible to vote in the contest, which was held on a one-person one-vote basis following reforms introduced by Mr Murphy.

      Speaking after the result was announced, Ms Dugdale said: “I know that the past few months have been incredibly difficult for Labour members across the country.

      “I know this because I have been out on the doorsteps, I have been there with you.

      “But I have a message for Labour Party members out there knocking their pan in for this party that we all love: we are down but we are not out.”

      She added: “I will work night and day over the coming weeks and months to make you proud, to honour that trust that you have put in me today, to give you some hope, to renew your faith in our abilities to transform the communities that we seek to serve.

      “And I have a message for the people of Scotland too: take another look at the Scottish Labour Party.

      “I am not so presumptuous as to ask instantly for your vote, but in the recent election 700,000 of you stuck with us, but many of you chose someone else,” Ms Dugdale said.

      “All I ask is that you take a fresh look at the Scottish Labour Party under my leadership.

      “We are changing. I am part of the new generation, someone without the baggage of the past.

      “I have a proud, positive vision for our country.

      “Scotland is a great nation, full of proud, talented and hardworking people and I want to make it even better.

      “I want to transform this country, to shake it up profoundly, so that the life chances of a child born today aren’t determined by how much their parents earn, but by their potential, by their work ethic, and by their ambition.

      “A Scotland where power and wealth are in the hands of the many and not the few.”

      Ms Dugdale said the party’s defeat in May, where it retained just one seat in Scotland at Westminster, was “a long time coming”.

      She said there were, in her view, two reasons “that led so many people to lose faith in us”.

      “Firstly, a large part of the population have simply switched off from us,” she said.

      “It’s not so much that they don’t like what they hear, they have stopped listening to us altogether.

      “Secondly, those who are willing to give us a hearing say that they don’t know what we stand for any more.

      “I can tell you that under my leadership there will be no question over what we stand for, or who we stand with.

      “If you want better for your kids but feel they are being let down, I am on your side.

      “If you fancy the challenge of setting up your own business but feel government doesn’t offer enough support, I am on your side.

      “And if you are a couple desperate to get on the housing ladder but face too many hurdles, I am on your side.

      “If you love this country but want to make it better, then we can work together.”

      I honestly didn’t make up any of this shite.

    49. galamcennalath says:

      Cartoon summaries perfectly!

      SLab will continue towards the cliff edge at speed, I presume.

      The aspect which really really annoys me is the way SLab muddle devolved and reserved areas. They pretend to have reserved policies different from head office, and some gullible fools swallow it.

      Sometimes they seem to forget what is devolved and no longer under WM control. Then to confuse further the conveniently forget that Holyrood block grant is still tied to WM policies. Then they blame SNP/SG for not acting on matters they have no powers over.

      They need to crash and burn asap for Scotland’s wellbeing!

    50. DerekM says:

      @ Dr Jim

      I agree Jim but hey if he manages to wake up those English idiots to the horrors that is their country then it can only be a good thing.

      As for Scotland if he thinks we will all blindly follow in their English labour enlightenment he is sadly mistaken and will face his first electoral thumping in 2016,unless he cuts loose the Scottish branch

    51. Flower of Scotland says:


      Just posted but it crashed so here goes again.

      George Galloway on RT just now suggesting that Corbyn will win and London Labour will take back Labour votes from the SNP, because they will be far more left wing than the SNP. He called us yellow Tories, I think.

      Therefore Scottish Independence will just go away!

    52. MrObycyek says:

      Nice cartoon altbough Kezia’s hands should be bigger. She has fingers like king size beef olives not to mention an arse at least as big as the car in the cartoon.

      Physical appearance aside, which of course is irrelevant here, the woman does not have two brain cells to rub together and has been shown time and time again that she does not have a clue. A terrible choice for leader.

      I still chuckle when I recall Ian Murray saying he found her inspiring. Talk about setting the ken bar low. Every time I see her speaking on tv I keep expecting to see someone beside her with a clipboard from the Guiness Book of Records checking to see if she has finally beaten the record for the most words spoken in a minute. She has not beaten the record yet but that is probably because what she says is unintelligible and even Guiness has standards.

      To think someone so stupid and out of touch with people could become a leader of any political party, albeit a low budget pocket size branch office version, gives me the shivers. Scottish Labour would have been better served just grabbing a random punter of the street and making them leader.

    53. Davy says:

      The car looks in better condition than scottish labour and theirs no chance it will ever be a left-hand drive. At least we know who will be front runner for ‘debator of the year award’.

    54. Jamie Arriere says:

      On the same theme as the cartoon, here’s another cartoon allegory of a day in the life of Scottish Labour – the question is Kez a ‘Walker’ or a ‘Wheeler’? (Doesn’t matter, the ending is still the same)

      Contains an appropriate amount of entitlement and anger at the public

      From the people who brought you ‘Corbyn Mania’, now here comes…

    55. Macart says:

      Oh, that is good. 😀

    56. Lesley-Anne says:

      The local newspaper in Kiddiminster is currently running a wee article about Louisa Sewell, specifically about the news that there seems to have been a wee bit of a local backlash to her fine.

      I have e-mailed one of their news editors to inform him that we here on Wings have done something more than just have a wee backlash. 😉

    57. orri says:

      The timeframe for mumber of “owners” is different. In the cartoon it’s the previous 8 years, in the papers it’s 16. Not only that but paints an even less impressive picture as the designation “Scottish Labour Party” seems to have come in to being between 2008 and 2011. makes it even clearer

      In May 2011, Ed Miliband commissioned Jim Murphy and Sarah Boyack to undertake a root-and-branch review of Scottish Labour in order “to achieve an effective, modern Scottish Labour Party, better able to earn the trust of, and deliver for, the people of Scotland.” Four months later, Murphy and Boyack unveiled the largest package of reforms to the Scottish Labour Party. The proposals, which included the creation, for the first time, of an elected Leader of the Scottish Labour Party, were approved by a special conference in Scotland on 29 October.
      In December 2011, Johann Lamont won the contest to become the first overall Leader of Scottish Labour.

      So only in (pseudo) existence for 4 years.

    58. Flower of Scotland says:

      What a great cartoon, Chris! I’ve shared it on Facebook.
      Says everything in one drawing! Thanks.

    59. Morag says:

      Sorry, just got in from helping with the SNP stand at the Peebles Show. Laughed like a drain. That’s a classic, Chris.

    60. velofello says:

      So that means she mebbe gets a company car then? Jings. The Green party would’ve gied her a bike. The Tories a flat so she could live by the river, handy for the BBC citadel of mirrors. The SNP? No job offer.

      A picture paints a thousand words, superb Señor Cairns, your are in Italy right? or is it Largs at Nardinis?

    61. boris says:

      An excellent astute picture outlining the future direction of the Labour Branch office that is the labour party in Scotland

    62. CameronB Brodie says:

      Synchronicity or what? 🙂

    63. ags_1888 says:

      Just had a wee debate wae ma maw,’clean yer room’ said she,I was like “it’s your hoos you clean it or give me the proper funds to sort it out”(being the rebellious bastirt I am)’whack’was the response,do as yer told and get back in yer room yer grounded ya wee prick….that being said,I told ma maw n da tae get it right up them n jamp oot the windae (the point of my comment is,we are all free or in shackles it depends if you conform to these unionist bastirts or if you want to jump oot the windae)

    64. willie fae kilwinning says:

      a BIT tae the right???

      It’s got full lock on and going round in bloody circles.

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