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Wings Over Scotland

We couldn’t have put it Better

Posted on July 03, 2013 by

Who says there’s no satire in Scottish politics? We’re indebted to the alert reader who sent us a link to this magnificent website from the ever-delightful Orange Order.

(“British Together is a campaign group set up by the Grand Orange Lodge of Scotland to assist the mainstream Unionist groups leading up to and including the independence referendum in 2014.”)


Why the Union? Want to read the positive case for the most successful political union the world has ever known? Just click the “Find Out More” button! Okay, try it again. You might have to click it quite a lot of times. Oh well, maybe one day.

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73 to “We couldn’t have put it Better”

  1. Ray says:

    I noticed this well over a week ago, but I only told Ross Greer on Twitter after he pointed out the site, rather than tell everyone. What a nobber I am. Still, it’s funny!

  2. pa_broon74 says:

    A virtual turd is still a turd.
    Their three wee shields contain one which is depicted in a photo of some soldiers giving a dodgy salute we saw recently, to do with the red hand of Ulster. I don’t think they’ll be converting people in great numbers.
    Its a bit like putting a waistcoat on a rottweiler.

  3. Ericmac says:

    Bigots Together

  4. big_al says:

    If you click the back arrow (or the forward arrow) at the side of the graphic many times in succession, you can watch the graphic flick back and forth.
    Might make you dizzy though!
    Couldn’t think of anything else useful to do on there.

  5. Atypical_Scot says:

    Better together…, 
    Normal sectarian rules apply.

  6. Bugger (the Panda) says:

    A John Bull waistcoat Pa Broon?

  7. handclapping says:

    With lodges in Canada, Ghana, New Zealand, etc. they can’t have any sense of irony.

  8. Adrian B says:

    Perhaps clicking the ‘find out more’ button results in BT Bookface likes?

  9. Gordon Hay says:

    About all that can be said for it is that it doesn’t place any cookies on your computer when you visit the site.

  10. Tom Hogg says:

    Don’t go posting nasty spoof messages though, since if you do, they will go running to their mammy and tell on you.

  11. Garve says:

    The graphic which says ‘Find Our More’ is not linked to anything at the moment. The graphic’s file name is ‘sing_up_now.gif’. At a guess, it should be ‘sign_up_now.gif’, though with the OO who knows? Maybe it’s supposed to play God Save the Queen louder and louder!

  12. MajorBloodnok says:

    @ Gordon Hay

    Jaffa cakes?

  13. Rev. Stuart Campbell says:

    Is nobody going to comment on how half of that flyer is printed in blue text against a blue background?


  14. Tom Hogg says:
    No indication of where and when the parades will be. Shame. I so want to find out more.

  15. I love their punctuation too. Is it compulsory to talk like the asthmatic Stevie from Malcolm in the Middle in the Orange Order?
    “The positive case for the UK, the most successful political union, the world has ever known.”

  16. Betsy says:

    @Tom Hogg,
    I think the route is from Glasgow Cathedral to Glasgow Green. They usually stomp down my street making a racket en route. I might pop out and ask them about the positive case for the union. They seem like a friendly, approachable bunch. 

  17. Tris says:

    Better Together as long as you’re not a catholic.
    But I note that, in one of their articles, they have had to criticise the Church of Scotland for jiggery pokery, as opposed, I suppose to Jiggery Popery from the other side. They also appear in the article to sneer at the fact that the woman addressing the General Assembly on Church and Society, appears to be a foreigner!  
    Lovely lot.

  18. Rev Stu Says:
    Is nobody going to comment on how half of that flyer is printed in blue text against a blue background?
    Already done in previous article, but what did you expect already? GREEN?!?

  19. Tattie-boggle says:

    No brain surgeons amongst the bowler hatted ones

  20. I still think the next major infrastructure project in Glasgow should  be a giant turbine wheel following Finbar Magee’s suggestion from NI.

  21. Bugger (the Panda) says:

    No need for brain surgeons unless for transplants

  22. Seasick Dave says:

    Craig Murray tells an interesting tale about Orangemen abroad…


  23. Tattie-boggle says:

    @ Bugger (the Panda)

  24. raineach says:

    Ah! I finally get it! And here was me thinking LOL stood for ‘lots of laughs’!

  25. Turnbull Drier says:

    @Rev.. I refer you to my previous comment 😛
    Turnbull Drier says:
    3July, 2013 at 11:56 am

    wow.. blue text, blue background.. thats nice…
    tools… <rolleyessmiely>

  26. Chic McGregor says:

    Tell you what would be funny.  If someone made tiny bowler hats and orange sashes and sneaked them on to the penguins in Edinburgh Zoo just before their preprandial parade. 🙂

  27. HandandShrimp says:

    Makes it look like the OO are part of the official BT camp…birds of a feather and all that 🙂

  28. Memphisto says:

    That PDF flashing text gave me a headache, they must have left it for a 12 year old to design.
    What is it with all these large groups/organisations/newspapers/media/focus groups/political parties telling people what to think. I seriously cant be bothered with any of them.
    Oh and there are actually 17 cookies on that site 🙂 twitter/facebook related though

    About all that can be said for it is that it doesn’t place any cookies on your computer when you visit the site.

  29. Turnbull Drier says:

    @ chicc Mcgregor
    Genius… where’s my photoshop gone….

  30. Stevie says:

    I pressed the ‘Find out more’ button and kept getting the circular runaround.
    In any case, there is absolutely no positive case for the union – that is patently clear given a year and a half of BritNat B.S. – a constant spewing of negativity and scaremongering from PROJECT FEAR.
    What a bunch of lying wasters out to protect their jobs at all costs.  A nation of rogues and waistrel liars.  One hopes the Scottish electorate sees through their media hyped gibberish.

  31. Stevie says:

    Why am I on pre-moderation?

    I simply won’t comment again, read, or link your articles if this continues.

  32. Restlessnative says:

    Now now,you lot are compromising the undoubted staunchness of their site.

  33. Gordon Hay says:

    Splitting hairs probably, but I wasn’t concerned about 15 Twitter trackers and a widget apiece for Twitter and FB that Ghostery and Priv3 blocked anyway – I just wanted to check there were no site cookies registering my presence there.

  34. Bill C says:

    @Al – Thanks for the link, fortunately I no longer live in my native Glasgow and will miss this “Celebration of Culture”.  Reminds me of the time I worked (as a student) in the Albert Bar in Glasgow’s southside. We were the only pub in the area to open as Orangemen had taken over and wrecked the Victoria Bar in Victoria Road two years earlier: The ‘Walk’ was going to Queen’s Park.  It was one of the most frightening experiences of my life. I was threatened and called a Fenian Bastard, all because I was not managing to serve my ‘customers’ quickly enough.  They ended up drinking their own wine and singing and dancing on the tables. I consider myself fortunate to have survived that afternoon without injury.
    They are not nice people! 

  35. Shinty says:

    Even as a protestant I have no time for these bigots, are young people still joining this shite or is it just the Neanderthals keeping sectarianism alive.
    These kind of marches (of whatever flavour) should be resigned to parks, and allow the decent citizens of Glasgow and visitors to go about their business in the city centre.

  36. Rev. Stuart Campbell says:

    “Why am I on pre-moderation?”

    Because you haven’t had a comment posted before. As it says on the About Us page, everyone’s first comment is moderated as an anti-spam measure. Once the first one’s been approved, subsequent ones go through automatically.

  37. James Morton says:

    I loved the section of the history of the Union condensed into a few short paragraphs. It was sort of crap at the start, then Protestants were top dog and everything was brilliant. Job Done! The union is saved Huzaah!

  38. Rev. Stuart Campbell says:

    “@Rev.. I refer you to my previous comment :P”

    That’s all very well, but if you trigger the [cite] tag by quoting an entire post including byline again I’m going to BRUTALLY MURDER YOU, so it’ll be a moot point.

  39. Sunshine on Crieff says:

    Taken from the Scotland the Brand story

    A tartan trim has been applied to all manner of public bodies north of the border in these exciting days of the nationalist hegemony. To NHS Scotland, Creative Scotland, Visit Scotland, Sport Scotland and Education Scotland, we can now add Police Scotland. This relentless rebranding has all the hallmarks of PR spin. Anyone who knows anything at all about propaganda knows that endless repetition is a powerful tool in shaping people’s attitudes.

    So, complaining about the inclusion of the word “Scotland” on the Grand Orange Lodge of Scotland special campaign site. Hmmm.

  40. Sunshine on Crieff says:

    On the positive side, perhaps the likes of UKIP, BNP, EDL/SDL, NF and assorted British nationalist groups now have a campaign group they can be better together with.

  41. Stevie says:

    Dear reverand, I have commented many times and I donated.

  42. Stevie says:

    Ah, wrong email address

  43. Rod Mac says:

    I wonder if Dr reid ,Jim Murphy , Roy , Dr Kelly and the other 30 or 40 Labour Stalwarts with season tickets at Parkhead will be marching with their fellow Britnats on the 12th?

  44. Bugger (the Panda) says:

    See, now it your turn for the belt.

  45. The Man in the Jar says:

    I am a member of this lot. The OO LOVE us! 😉

  46. Bugger (the Panda) says:

    Rod Mac
    Incidentally Dr Kelly is not really a doctor, medicine or philosophy or anything academic.
    His is an honorary doctorate, like what naff Unis give to pop stars so the Principal can get his photie in the local rag

  47. scottish_skier says:

    @Stevie. Did you change your name or e-mail address in the comment posting form? I understand any changes to these would cause you to be flagged up as a new poster.

    EDIT. Ok, I see you found the problem.

  48. Max says:

    I think the Orange Order should be quoting Psalm 19.3 rather than 19.4 in this failed attempt to describe the positive case for the union.
    Psalm 19:3 They have no speech, they use no words; no sound is heard from them

  49. Andy-B says:

    Why the union… good question indeed, why Westminster..why Trident..why the Tories..why illegal many whys so little time.

  50. Vronsky says:

    I worked with a guy years ago and occasionally bumped into him outside of work as we were both runners. He was a very quiet and sweet person.  He shocked me one day by saying that he had been a member of the Orange Order.  He explained that it was a family thing – everyone was in it. He became unpopular by leaving.  They’re the dregs, he said, with feeling.

  51. Turnbull Drier says:

    @ Rev

    That’s all very well, but if you trigger the [cite] tag by quoting an entire post including byline again I’m going to BRUTALLY MURDER YOU, so it’ll be a moot poin

    okok.. I thought I’d removed it, but dam.. sorry….

    I’m off to the car park to flagellate myself in full view of the public with a sign round my neck stating..

    “I will smite the cite”

    I hope this will act as a deterrent to any would be poster who has the audacity to misuse this most heinous of tags

  52. Archibald Berwick Melrose [aka Archie] says:

    Any abusive, threatening or distasteful messages will be reported to the relevant authorities
    Oh yes thats what ye get when you look at their ‘contact page’. The relevant authorities being who or is it whom? However I was briefly mollified when I read that the OO are a Christian Organisation only to read their vitriol extended to a Church of Scotland spokesperson with ‘distasteful’ comments such as ‘an anti-nuke tree-hugger’. Oh dinna report me, I will be good, honestly! I will not make comment about the OO’s use of Psalm 19:4 as a logo. Oh bugger it yes I will – for those of you on WOS who dont know Psalm 19 [Old Testament] literally translates -SHUT YOUR FACE, ZIP IT, STAY SILENT – God does not need the threatening tackiness of the OO, or misguided Maggie Fair drunkards to complete His blessing for Scotland and its People next year.

  53. Craig P says:

    TMIAJ said:
    I am a member of this lot.
    Man in a Jar – we are laughing at britishtogether but at least the OO site didn’t play music at me!

  54. Training Day says:

    Like the author of the flyer, I’ve always found King Billy to be better in ‘marshal’ pose than in ‘martial’ pose.  Sheesh.
    Anyway, lay off the OO – as the flyer shows they’re all about giving to charity, fun days out and not being a political movement in any way.  Except for now, when they are a political movement.  But at all other times they’re not. 

  55. Stevie says:

    Sorry, a bit sensitive I guess.  Used to go to newsnet, read the articles, comment but their comment page became a tad user unfriendly and I stopped going there and because of that I stopped donating really. 

    I still pop in for my pages to see if the main article is worth linking but Newsnet has shot itself in the foot a bit judging by the decrease in article links – though perhaps there are just more sources now such as WOS.

  56. big_al says:

    Is this the same orange order who a few years ago advocated the taking up of arms should Scotland become independent?

  57. Memphisto says:

    @Gordon Hay
    Oh right I thought you were also making reference to the fact they have no cookie policy switch which most websites should now have (EU law), and that includes Social Media cookies.  Naughty BritainTogether! Its not as if they would want to comply with the EU anyway 🙂

  58. ianbrotherhood says:

    Are we meant to click that ‘Find Out More’ button?
    Maybe it’s just a kind of ‘note to self’ the author wrote, then couldn’t work out how to delete…

  59. The Man in the Jar says:

    @Craig P
    News to me!

  60. scottish_skier says:

    Talking about the orange order… A new lady at the office from Eire told me something I didn’t know.

    From wiki:
    “green representing the Gaelic tradition of Ireland, orange representing the followers of William of Orange in Ireland, and white representing the aspiration for peace between them.”

    Contrast that with the imperial flag that is the butcher’s apron.

  61. The Man in the Jar says:

    I have mentioned this in previous comments so I won’t repeat. However I “phoned in” to Radio Scotland one Monday morning to tackle “The Grand Master” regarding the previous Saturdays parade in Glasgow. The trigger for me phoning was some daft wifey going on about “what a wonderful carnival atmosphere there was at the walk” The only thing resembling a carnival was the amount of clowns present.
    Oh well it is the time of year when I have to close all windows and doors, turn my hi-fi right up to drown out the boom, boom, toot, toot, boom, boom wafting across the Clyde from a neighbouring village. I can tell when they pass the Chapel the volume goes up to 11. This of course is almost as pleasing as being stuck in a long tailback behind one of their parades.

  62. scottish_skier says:

    What is it about British nationalists and flag burning.
    Here’s one of the lovely bonfires they prepare so they can set Ireland’s flag alight.

    What a great day out for the kids. “Hey son, we’re going to communally hate Irish people today; set their flag alight and everything. Away and put on the union flag t-shirt I bought you.”

  63. Peter says:

    Is the Confederation Helvetica not a more successful union than the UK? They’ve not had a civil war for quite a long time are quite rich and don’t seem to be as despised as certain countries.

  64. Murray McCallum says:

    Must be so depressing for them living in the 17th century.  No wonder the inter web is a challenge for them.

  65. Vincent McDee says:

    We in the Orange Order care passionately about our country, and we are determined to save it. We need YOUR help, whether a member of the institution or not, no matter how much or little time you can spare, fill in the form below and we will keep you informed. Your details will be safe and not shared.
    Any abusive, threatening or distasteful messages will be reported to the relevant authorities
    And they mean it!

  66. ianbrotherhood says:

    @BillC (2.17)-
    I’m going to have a wild stab here and guess the year you’re talking about – was it ’82, maybe ’83?
    Whatever – the year they wrecked Victoria Road was really quite unbelievable, and I doubt there’s any documentary footage of it. It’s well-nigh impossible to convey what it felt like in Govanhill that day.
    I lived in nearby Crosshill and worked in a restaurant very close to the Qns Park main entrance, at the end of Viccy Road – I’m sure we shut that day, like most other places, but I couldn’t help following and watching it all from a safe-ish distance with my Dad.
    Virtually every unshuttered shop window on Victoria Rd was smashed, including the big supermarket (was it a Fine Fare?) – police moved them down towards the Citizens Theatre, then did a sort of pincer movement, brought in vans, released dogs on twenty-odd foot leashes, forced them to head Govan-wise.
    It was the closest I’ve ever seen to an actual combat zone. Utterly terrifying.
    No doubt some of the participants are older, wiser, and ashamed of what they did, but there will be a retarded rump who remember it all as a ‘protest’ of sorts, truly believe it had something to do with their ‘rights’, and would relish the chance to replay past glories – they’re the ones we should be wary of.
    They haven’t gone away – their southern soulmates seem to be in rude health, as evidenced on the ‘British Together’ thread.

  67. Bill C says:

    @ianbrotherhood – Sorry Ian I think it was 1972, however I remember the year you are talking about, I also lived in Crosshill at the time. Unless you have seen these ‘loyalists’ in action you would not believe what they are capable of. As I have said before on here and elsewhere, do not underestimate what their hatred will make them capable of.

  68. ianbrotherhood says:

    Thanks for that.
    The very fact we can get such similar ‘events’ confused speaks volumes.
    In 1972 I was nine, living on the aptly named Battlefield Rd, so I wouldn’t have witnessed any of the Viccy Road palaver that time ’round. But that was Bloody Sunday year as well, right? I daresay Mum had us barricaded inside, playing Monopoly or somesuch, fabricating reasons why we couldn’t even go ‘out the back’.
    So it went, and so it goes…

  69. john king says:

    clicked find out more dozens of times and still none the wiser,
    but the suggestion to click the forward and back arrows wasn’t funny, I fell of my chair and now i’ve got a bruise, thanks a bunch big al 😉

  70. john king says:

    “No brain surgeons amongst the bowler hatted ones”
    That comment gave me a terrible thought, what if one of them DOES need brain surgery, what do they do? do they do like keyhole surgery through the top of their bowler hat or sumthin?

  71. john king says:

    “Tell you what would be funny.  If someone made tiny bowler hats and orange sashes and sneaked them on to the penguins in Edinburgh Zoo just before their preprandial parade.” 
    Would that be with or without aperitif sir?

    but its always nice to see someone taking dressing for dinner seriously isnt it? 🙂

  72. john king says:

    Never really understood why the authorities put up with these idiots parading their revolting bigotry in the streets every year, this kind of thing diminishes Scotland and to outsiders makes us look like a backward country, imagine people marching through streets of Boston trashing the place recalling the great confederacy and calling the onlookers white trash

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