The parting shot
Posted on
October 25, 2014 by
Rev. Stuart Campbell
Our undercover agent inside Labour (whose identity we can’t reveal, other than their codename “Nasa Warsar”) just leaked us this internal security-camera footage from both the Scottish and UK party HQs at the time of Johann Lamont’s resignation.
We’re sure readers can work out who’s who.
Lift for Lamont.
Too easy, eyebrow and hair colour a dead give away.
Wired to the Moon II.. the Wrath of Johann….
Uuurghh! Past me the Brain Bleach!!! I just had a flash image of Johann strutting about with a blonde mullet and a top slash cut to the waist, showing her manly chest!!!
After all his slippery positioning Murphy has to throw his hat in the ring.
Oh what fun!
link to commentisntfree.com
I think the one with frizzy hair and the red top is Jackie Bird.Is Scotty proud?
she’ll likely see that as a lovebomb!
“Scotty get us out of here, best possible speed” Aye Skipper. Who lost and who won 18th Sept again? Watching Alex Salmond on Question Time last week and now the vote No freak show disintegrates, its hard to tell.
Capt Ed Milliband says:
“Beam me up another Scotty!”
Johann Lamont just couldn’t Klingon any longer.
I think Wings should start a petition calling for Lamont to be reinstated.
P.S. Don’t let Gordon Brown know about it
Red Tory Dwarf!
Labour certainly need a genisis project
“Get us out of here… Best possible speed”.
New sci-fi film about Labour in Scotland..
2014: A Space (between the ears) Odyssey
The fact that labour still has supporters and sponsors in Scotland – and people that each and everyone of us know well and who we live life with, is a mystery and its a condition that simply must have a psychological tag to describe it.
For the love of the wee man! – Who in their right mind would support this shower of bampots – supporting past principles is one thing and quite understandable as a virtue – but to put your trust and affiliation in the hands of these cretins beggars belief.
Sorry Rev but you have been had by a spoof video here – at approx 1.35 into the clip the word “COMMIT” appears – obviously guff since labour are committed to nothing but themselves…
Gosh who’d have thought it the BBC national news showing the “imperial masters” clip as the establishment realise that this is a big stick to beat Ed with while promoting UKIP. Can’t we get the Margomobile outside the Labour party dinner with a PA system and appropriate music?
The Final Frontier; Oblivion.
“Set phasers tae malky”
All of which merely confirms me in my doubt (if that is not a contradiction). I do not believe the result.
However as I have said here many times before the SNP is not beating Labour in Scotland it is replacing it – in fact has by now probably replaced it. I will be surprised of Labour’s actual paid up membership in Scotland is above 5000 and it exists as a major political force on the back of residual elected membership,some vested interest and a huge generous press
More important from Labour’s point of view is that fact that it is impossible to produce good leaders for a worthless cause -and that is where they are now.
The referendum campaign was basically the Tories against Scotland. Labour in Scotland fronted that campaign and committed suicide in the process
What a great day to be alive. I look forward to seeing how this is spun by the faithfull. A quick scan of Hothersall’s twitter account last night revealed an exceptional level of nervous confidence. Just wait until Kezia takes down Sturgeon… that kind of thing. What a load of shit.
“Blow for Sturgeon (and Salmond) as Scottish Labour disintigrates in blizzard of recriminations”
Have a great weekend team.
“It’s like hee haw wuv ever seen afore captain, ken?”
Sorry, I’m wearing the joke thin, but can’t resist.
Truth: the final frontier. These are the voyages of the starship Scottish Labour. Its five-year mission: to exploit strange new laws, to seek out lowlifes with no civilization, to badly go where no party has gone before.
When a leader of the winning ‘No’ team does a runner, that is when you know Scotland is seriously f’cked.
With every day that passes it becomes clearer that Scotland has been shafted. We need another vote within five years with a straight Yes / No question and no pissing about with what a No actually means.
This whole thing is a farcical injustice which has to be put right.
And talk of replacing her with Douglas Alexander have also got to be pie in the sky.
If ever there was a Red Tory in Scotland, it is Douglas Alexander. That guy definitely joined the wrong Party.
He wants to be as far away from Scotland and it’s politics as possible. That is why he put in for the Shadow Foreign Secretary’s job. It means he’s always flying AWAY from Scotland when he is at his work.
And also talks endless shit about nothing. He is my local MP and my number one target for May 2015 GE.
The Astonishing Journey! Announced, first movie to be made in new Scottish Film Studio project is a remake of sci-Fi classic!
Rev its no offen ah git Pedantic, but you,ve sleiled the 1st part of that name wrang its NUSA,let me know if you need any more help, always happy to oblidge.
Can you just see Gordon Brown getting a doing from Nicola at FMQ’s, seriously. Now I would actually pay big bucks to watch that.
& the word meant is ( Speiled) before any pedants get on to me lol.
Beam her up Scotty and take her far away from the lever of powers. I cant think of one redeeming feature of her term as opposition leader. She was full of spite and hatred. Her slurs of ‘virus’ and ‘something for nothing’ jibes will live long in the memory. A thoroughly unlikeable person.
Her realisation of London control is like a sick joke 5 weeks too late. It proves the adage true about Labour that party first before country and its citizens and for that she wont be forgiven.
I have to actually remind myself what side won on september 18 with the incredible membership surge for the pro indy parties, the smashing of the vow and her resigning. It proves that the vote hasnt killed independence off. Far from it. Our dream of an independent Scotland is still alive its the nightmare of Lamont as our First Minister is over. Good riddance to her.
Oh what a Glorious week weil see weil be busy as ah busy busy Bee Cmon Arthur sing along.
It’s completely inaccurate to say that London controls the Scottish Labour party. I mean they gave her a choice. Resign or be sacked!
Now we have the crocodile tears. What a load of croc that is.
just can’t stop shakin ma head and laffin – few noers at work are getting an email on monday
I’m not up on Star Trek but I’m guessing Kirk is Miliband, Sulu is Sarwar, Spock is Murphy and wasn’t Kirsty Alley nicer before she got into Scientology?
Online Labour says Lamont is a really nice lady. She just talked shite then.
link to wingsoverscotland.com
Cosmic girl.
From Alan Cochrane in the Daily Telegraph:
She has been especially incensed that her former friend and colleague, Margaret Curran, now Shadow Scottish Secretary and a member of Mr Miliband’s inner circle, has been, according to Labour sources, canvassing members of the party’s ruling executive – urging them to persuade Ms Lamont to resign. Claims that she had been lobbying for Ms Lamont’s resignation have been denied by Ms Curran.
Ms Lamont has also been on the receiving end of continued sniping from Scottish Labour MPs, many of whom fear that they’d lose their seats unless there was a change of leadership north of the border. Thousands of voters in normally rock-solid Labour areas such as Glasgow and North Lanarkshire switched to the SNP-dominated Yes campaign in the referendum battle.
I just hope she doesn’t go back to being a schoolteacher. I know it’s Halloween and all, but seriously – letting your kids near that kind of thing is way the hell too scary.
link to youtube.com
Rancid old Graun’s fighting back for their girl now!
“Brown has not commented on Connarty’s call but issued a statement in which he said he was sorry to hear of the resignation of Lamont who, he said, “brought determination, compassion and a down-to-earth approach to the leadership”.
But Libby Carrell also sez
“Miliband barred Lamont from attacking bedroom tax for 12 months
Glasgow Pollok MSP, who quit as head of Scottish Labour, was told to stay mute on topic while party leader decided on policy”
Crash Gordon also silent on his Bedroom tax too. Funny that.
Will celebrate this glorious event with 4 pints of Guinness to remember the 4 Scottish labour leaders that our First Minister has seen off while in office – followed by 4 Balvennies – for the sheer fucking hell of it :)- Happy days
She was only a crofter daughter but she thought the Clearances were a bag sale.
muttley79 says:
25 October, 2014 at 1:31 pm
From Alan Cochrane in the Daily Telegraph:
She has been especially incensed that her former friend and colleague, Margaret Curran, now Shadow Scottish Secretary and a member of Mr Miliband’s inner circle, has been, according to Labour sources, canvassing members of the party’s ruling executive – urging them to persuade Ms Lamont to resign. Claims that she had been lobbying for Ms Lamont’s resignation have been denied by Ms Curran.
Ms Lamont has also been on the receiving end of continued sniping from Scottish Labour MPs, many of whom fear that they’d lose their seats unless there was a change of leadership north of the border. Thousands of voters in normally rock-solid Labour areas such as Glasgow and North Lanarkshire switched to the SNP-dominated Yes campaign in the referendum battle.,
John Mason MSP could easily knock out Curran at the GE, if he could be persuaded to stand for Glasgow NE again. If Curran defies the odds and scrapes it, then JM remains an MSP. What’s to lose?
Is anyone surprised/shocked by events since the early hours of the 19th of September? What a low that was, we got as close as we have ever been to independence, the British establishment was visibly shaken in the last week of campaigning. Then Salmond resigned as FM, it looked like another massive loss. Yet, tens of thousands of people then joined pro-independence parties. Lamont has now resigned as the supposed leader of SLAB, although she never was in fact that.
With the hindsight of little over a month, the resignation of Salmond looks like a masterstroke. It marked the lowest moment for the Yes campaign. However, it successfully set the agenda for what followed. It gave Sturgeon the chance to take over as FM and leader of the SNP. She will bring her own ideas and had an excellent referendum campaign. Salmond looks like he is going to stand for Westminster, which gives the SNP’s campaign for the general election a massive boost, and much needed profile. He is going to be relieved of the burden of office very shortly, and can get fired into the unionists. All in all, I do not think we could possibly have had a better month since the referendum, given the result and the bitter disappointment involved.
Donald Anderson
Hope you didn’t actually buy that DR you were talking about.
If you did then report to Paula Rose for correctional training and discipline.
“Shiny shiny,
shiny boots of leather…”
I’m reminded of the Chicken Song circa 1986 (younger readers can YouTube it):-
“There’s Murphy on the starboard bow, starboard bow, starboard bow,
There’s Sarwar on the starboard bow, Erchie beam me up!”….
Johanns lament.
link to youtube.com
BBC Curtice lying for the Union. P45
Public servant insulting Scottish taxpayers.
& anither wan.
link to youtube.com
Sorry, sorry, O/T again *grovels*
@liveIndyScot Broadcasting @The_SSP_ Party Conference
LIVE
link to tinyurl.com
Afternoon interviews about to start.
PLEASE support their fundraiser link to tinyurl.com
@ twenty14
Balvenie distillery is owned by William Grant & Sons who” have donated £100,000 to the campaign to keep Scotland in the UK.”
They are on `Boycott the Traitors` list.
“to the last I grapple with thee; from hell’s heart I stab at thee; for hate’s sake I spit my last breath at thee. Sink all coffins and all hearses to one common pool! and since neither can be mine, let me then tow to pieces, while still chasing thee, though tied to thee, thou damned whale! Thus, I give up the spear!”
Who’s Moby Dick though? Yes Scotland. Completely relevant here but Melville Street’s in the heart of Nicola Sturgeon’s Pollokshields constituency.
Frankly, I find the comparison between Lamont & Khan offensive: Khan actually WAS genetically programmed, after all!
The less said about the implication that Ed Milliband is New Labour’s Kirk, the better – he’s their Archer, at best.
link to youtube.com
With the official acknowledgement by the branch office(Scotland) that they are merely puppets of the WM labour party, maybe they should appoint a sock puppet as their new manager.
Misquoting Spock- “Die quickly and poverty stricken”.
How the hell can Gordon Brown contemplate becoming Labour Group leader?
The only way he could function in the job is locking out all public and media from FM Question Time, bus in a bunch of gaga pensioners terrified of losing their teeth and wits, harangue waffle at them for an hour, and then refuse to answer to the press.
If Murphy, Brown or Alexander are going to stand surely their first step has to be finding a safe Scottish parliamentary seat?
Even if they could manipulate a by election which seat would they feel confident standing in? If they leave it until 2016 it would arguably be an even harder task.
None of the ‘big’ hitters can take the risk of standing for a seat and loosing it would be career suicide for them and an absolute embarrassment for the Labour party. If they choose to get them in via the regional list this would just confirm they are political also runs on a similar standing to the Tories.
Some golden nuggets from the MSM:-
The Guardian, quoting Johann : “…Scotland is an equal partner in the UK. Scotland has chosen home rule – not London rule”.
Fraser Nelson, the Spectator : Murphy deserves a “knighthood” for his battle to save the Union. Wm Hill have odds on 8 people succeeding Johann (Ken MacIntosh isn’t one of them). Evens favourite is Anas Sarwar. Fraser thinks Anas is suitably qualified to judge the state of Scottish state education since devolution, by virtue of Anas choosing to send his kids to private school.
On the Star Trek theme, do these people inhabit some parallel universe?…
Perhaps now that they are being a bit more open, it should now be possible for someone from SLab media wing, EBCScotland, to take charge of the political department!
galamcennalath says
“Set phasers tae malky”
Set phasers tae severe malky,
there fixed that for you.
Democracy Reborn
she’s ‘avin a laugh an’ trying to reinvent herself as a democrat.
May I suggest that twenty 14 ditch the Balvenie for a bottle of Edradour, Grant’s once owned this little gem of a distillery but sold it on and is now privately owned. Only problem is that they used to send it to the house of lords and commons, I omit the capitals as they are not important enough.
From now on, and only in so far as it survives at all,
Labour in Scotland will be a Unionist brand
with the sole purpose of undermining the Independence movement.
Time now to get serious about the BBC and Messrs. McQuarrie & Boothman in particular.
Congrats Stu’.
Star Trek II is THE best Star Trek film ever.
Looks like the Klingon’s on the starboard bow, I’m sure you can get a cream or something like that for it.
(from “Do a feel lucky punk” about Jim Murphy)
“If someone snapped a pencil in the same room as him he’d probably have to change his trousers and cover the smell”.
Belter.
Ricardo Montalban and Patrick Swayze.
Quality.
O/T
Just to repeat @X-Sticks plea at 2:11pm
Livestream of SSP conference on now (see X-Sticks post for link) and please consider supporting the IndyLive team’s fundraiser (also in X-Sticks post at 2:11pm)
Folks, it matters not one iota who Slabbers next leader will be.
At the end of the day you simply cannot polish a turd.
They are what they are – Red Tory Traitors – one and all.
Am I missing something here
Labour will need someone to lead in holyrood and ask the fm questions, that by definition means some other slab msp
Since sarwar is deputy thingy anyways, he can have the empty title
Sit in at pathetic quay?
With 10k supporters camped outside, the fuzzx wouldnt hàve a hope of stopping it!
Scots daily dose of unionist shit drying up would make london shit its breeks!
GE 2015. We don’t want Alex to stand IN Gordon.
We want Alex to stand AGAINST Gordon
Not sure wee Dougie Alexander has a shot at the golden ring, cos apparently the London HQ nicknamed him Rainman, for his inability to look at anyone or connect with people during the referendum.
Scraping the barrel = potential Slabbers leader in Holyrood
Evan Davies struggles to herd Russell Brand into more acceptable soundbitey mode.
link to youtube.com
“I don’t trust politicians or corporations in this country.” 15 min.
Good observation on the BBCs “shameful” role in Scottish referendum.
twenty 14
Try the Arran Malt anything from 12 years on is great to fantastic. Neutral stance in referendum, although most of the staff I know at the Distillery are strong Yessers.
If you fancy something to go with Coffee, you cant beat Arran Gold, blows Baileys et al out of the water.
End of commercial, in the interests of fairness I should confess that I have a relation that works at the Distillery.
There’s something quite telling if Anas Sarwar’s views are to be beamed from Westminster into Holyrood for FM questions.
Elected MP Anas Sarwar would have the golden opportunity to directly quiz Ms. Sturgeon and her SNP dictatorship.
Labour’s contact with the people of Scotland starts right there.
I’ll miss out the Balvennie till I’ve had 10 Guinness to celebrate this wonderful day – then I’ll forget and have a Balvennie – simples
Milliband’s Muppets (Lamont, Curran, Murphy, Alexander, Dogdale, Ballie)
Who knew? (Except 1.6 million people)
Taranaich – I had JoLa and her ilk as being like Broca, the puppet Cardassian leader in late DS9.
link to en.memory-alpha.org
I love this every time I read it –
Alex Massie on Johann Lamont
“What you see is the intellectual incoherence and bankruptcy of the Scottish Labour Party. A party that hasn’t had a meaningful idea in at least a dozen years. …Labour haven’t really recovered from losing in 2007 let alone 2011. Yi know this is a party that had the sort of arrogance and complacency that swanked around the place speaking as the voice of the people, it turns out that the people don’t think that the Labour Party represents them”
What the media and Ed Miliband really want to know is:
What does Labour magnate Professor John Curtice think?
The Labour collective has so many drones to chose from. The trouble is that they are all the same. Useless unthinking automatons!
Sit in at Pacific Quay? Great!
But if done IN ADDITION to cancelling the TV LICENCE
then it is going to be MUCH more effective.
Ken McQuarrie and John Boothman don’t give a shit about protesters outside BBC Scotland, no matter how many, ‘cos on a Sunday afternoon they’re not there.
During IndyRef, if the 1.6 million Yes voters had, in addition, cancelled their TV Licence, we might have got a different result.
Sure, it’s not easy if you are addicted to TV and can’t live without live soaps or whatever. But it’s only for a little while, and while you are minus your Licence you will feel really good about it because you will be doing something which is really effective.
Go on! Do it! and get a grip on Independence. The don’t let go till we have it all.
From Kevin McKenna Observer May 14: “Many of those claiming that Scotland has become perilously divided against itself because of the referendum on independence are from the Unionist side of the argument and, specifically, Labour. Nor should we be surprised. For such a narrative helps to mask the underlying reality of a grievously divided Scottish Labour party.”
I know people don’t like post-mortems on the indy campaign, doesn’t stop me thinking how I could have done better in Herald postings. I went easy on Labour to not antagonise Labour readers, or particularly the Herald itself. Perhaps I should have gone for the jugular, and exploited that division.
O/T slightly, because I know how much Rev Stu loathes and detests verse, but I’ve been working with Dolly Parton on a wee farewell tribute to Johann and here are the results.
link to williamduguid.blogspot.co.uk
Funny that no mention of captain Davros Darling stepping into the breech (sp?)I wonder why?. Gordon Brown? Nah. He’s Flash remember, he saves universes when stars collide and all that. He’s way beyond Tamany hall squabbling at Holyrood, he needs a stage far far bigger than that.they couldn’t afford him.
She canny dae it, Jim! She’ll blow before we reach warp speed.
@ William 5.13
Brilliant !
It would be to give Johan Lamont a credibility she doesn’t possess, to suggest her actions in resigning demonstrate a degree of political foresight, yet it is possible she has highlighted an uncomfortable truth for ALL Westminster.
In one of the bitterest political leadership resignations for many decades, Lamont has drawn attention to the dramatic way in which Scotland’s politics have changed post referendum, and that running Labour as a branch office is no longer adequate for Scotland.
Running Scotland as a ‘branch office’ of the UK, is also no longer adequate.
If we think back to the Labour defeat in 2011 at the Scottish general election, Johan Lamont was appointed with the strict understanding that SHE was in charge of Labour in Scotland – a ‘proper’ Scottish Labour leader at last. At least this is what the party told us, and it would seem, Johan Lamont actually believed. Of course, it has been clear for several years, that London Labour never intended honouring such a commitment, and as soon as Johan was in place, her decisions were given no attention in London. She became, in any sense, a NON-leader of Labour in Scotland. So far as Jim Murphy and his ilk were concerned, it was business as usual, party decisions continued to be made in London, where the ‘important’ Labour people were. Scotland and its people, once again, became a side issue, an irrelevancy to Labour in London.
Maybe Johan hung on during the referendum campaign, because she believed that the implicit threat of a YES victory would serve as a wake up call to the Scottish Labour MP’s in London. For a while, it seemed like it worked, with many of them desperately running around TV studios fighting to save their own lucrative westminster careers, with their noses firmly in London’s trough. With the NO result of the referendum, they all went back to London, and very quickly, forgot the scare they had just had and how close they came to losing it all. It was/is once again, business as usual for Labour’s Westminster’ MP’s. Scotland once again became a side issue, an irrelevancy.
Clearly that was the final push for Lamont.
Now, following her resignation, for a few days, maybe a week, Labour MP’s from Scotland will once again wring their hands in public, promising change. promises that will never be delivered.
Out of all of this, however, one thing now seems clear, and that is simply this, the political demands of Scots, have changed radically, to the extent that the policies of London Labour seem irrelevant to Scots.
We now have had a left of centre (further left than Labour) progressive Scottish SNP Government for seven and a half years. In London we have had 4 years of one of the most extreme right wing Governments the UK has seen, opposed by one of the weakest right wing Labour party front benches in history. Neither of them matches where Scotland is at present, culturally or politically. There is a real disconnect, not just within the Labour party, but between Westminster and Scotland in general, and it really isn’t all about the SNP or independence.
Westminster and rUK policies are at odds with Scotland, and with each passing day, the gulf becomes larger. It isn’t just Labour affected in this way, it actually affects ALL the main Westminster parties. The overall effect of this, is to now make it impossible for a political party espousing policies which meet voters needs in Southern England, to present those same policies credibly in Scotland. This was first seen with the Tories many years ago, but now it is also true of Labour and the Libdems.
In effect, Johan Lamont was right. Scottish Labour DOES need to be completely separate if it wants to have electoral success in Scotland, likewise for the Tories (Murdo Fraser did have the right idea), but NOBODY in London is listening, and so we have the mess as evidenced by Labour’s long slow lingering death in Scotland.
This is not the end of it however, as it is clear as day to any sane Scot, that Westminster rule of Scotland is simply untenable. It is at present a fudge, to paper up the cracks in this dis-united kingdom. The UK as a single political entity in reality died many years ago, it’s just that Westminster still hasn’t noticed. Maybe, just maybe, the actions of Lamont will make London wake up, and realise that if they wish to keep Scotland even notionally as ‘part’ of the UK, then they need to introduce home rule (REAL devo max), ASAP, possibly making Scotland a crown dependency or similar.
As things stand, we can all see that the UK as a single political entity is finished, and must wait to see the expected tepid half-measures to be proposed by the Smith commission.
If Westminster was smart, they would rapidly make REAL Scottish home rule a priority, and Labour would make Labour in Scotland a REAL separate political entity – a genuine Scottish Labour party.
I’ll not hold my breath waiting for either.
William Duguid
Loved the poem. May I suggest a small improvement?
In the last verse replace cheer with jeer. To me it seems more in character:
Your constant tinny little sneer
Dismissing hope and spreading fear
As Tories gathered round to jeer
William Duguid?
Any relation to this guy?
link to youtube.com
Robert Louis 6:21pm
Good analysis. I won’t be holding my breath either.
Robert Louis
Very well said Robert, sadly they will never change. It was evident the moment Cameron talked of more powers for Scotland at the same time as Englands . Barely hours past and the so called vow was chucked on the back burner.
They will never give up on the resources of Scotland. It props up a bankrupted UK. We will be milked for everything we have first.
England is still half asleep, blaming foreigners for everything, allowing their NHS to be privatised, and as we saw on QT, even though the northern cities like Liverpool etc are suffering horrific cuts , they do nothing about it other than voting in the UKIP.
Why don’t they organise themselves ? They have the numbers to make drastic changes but blame others for their lot.
We have shown what can be done when the people mobilise. We have given them plenty of examples to copy or improve but they do nothing.
Sure some have protested but where was the public support ?
Their apathy is appalling .
We must do this ourselves. And we will .
Scotland is different from the rUK . We know the value of our votes, sadly apathy and blame are easier than getting off their collective arses and doing something about the state of these Islands.
Labour are finished here, The tory’s will win another term and Scotland will be robbed of it’s assets for another 5 Years.
No voters – What have you done.
Robert Louis,
Good post and a very good summary.
Labour will not change – not until they lose another couple of elections to the Tories down south.
It is too late for SLab. Westminster is just too attractive for their MPs where they can sit in opposition and not have to do anything except work out how to claim more expenses. For many of them Holyrood is a 2nd tier parliament but Lamont finally realised that Holyrood is far more important to the Scottish people and gets far more media coverage up here.
Scottish Labour MPs have become increasingly invisible over the last few years as they are pretty irrelevant. They have no power to do anything for Scotland outvoted by 10:1. That is why nobody notices if Gordon Brown is there or not.
D’ya think she might end up in the house of lords, now wouldn’t that be a hoot, mind you , she hasn’t “returned” unwanted money to Westminster like Jack did, so probably not .
“Um lady Lamont so ah pure dead um, awrite”
For God’s Sake, you can’t leave us like this, did Enterprise get away????