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Eyes on the prized

Posted on September 02, 2017 by

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  1. 02 09 17 08:57

    Eyes on the prized | speymouth

72 to “Eyes on the prized”

  1. Bugger (the Panda) says:

    Toxic gas called to help one poisonous, useless, divisive arrivist politician.

    Don’t worry if it isn’t him his time, it will be sometime by the Law of Buggin’s Turn.

    Great, bring it on.

    Oh and welcome back Chris. Where is it from, this time?

  2. BJ says:

    Rejected as an MP, rejected in the Constituancy vote, Sarwar now needs this just prove disasters come in three’s.

  3. MajorBloodnok says:

    Raiders of the Lost Cause

  4. starlaw says:

    Many a curry dinner party will be held in the west of Scotland during the coming weeks.

  5. Fergus Green says:

    It looks like everyone in Scottish Labour gets a chance at being branch manager for a year or so. Who will follow Anas next year?

  6. defo says:

    It’s going to have to come down to drawings straws.
    Who would want it ?

  7. mogabee says:

    Genius. You’ve caught his political personality for all to see, vacuous, mindless, self-absorbed and in the end he’ll not give SLabour back it’s mojo.

    But I have to wonder why you didn’t use a ring… 😀 😀 😀

  8. galamcennalath says:

    It has certainly been a poisoned chalice for all who have chosen to drink from it!

  9. Almannysbunnet says:

    Leading the labour branch in Scotland, it’s like the rotating presidency of the EU, everyone gets a turn eventually and if you hang around long enough, who knows, you might get a second go.

  10. Sinky says:

    Well informed article by Tom Gordon in Herald on the poor state of Labour in Scotland and reports on SNP’s dire annual accounts.

  11. defo says:

    “But I have to wonder why you didn’t use a ring”

    He kissed the messiahs ring in the last round,to get to this level.

  12. Jason Smoothpiece says:

    To be fair to the Red British Nationalists aka Scottish Labour they really don,t have much to pick from.

    However I don’t think this matters as most people are aware that the Tory supporting Slab are now irrelevant.

    I think voters with an anti Scottish slant should resurrect The Natural Law Party.

    The NLP were not very effective, a bit like the Scottish British Nationalist party’s we have today, but they were even funnier than Gordon Brown and Jim Murphy put together.

    Let’s face it we all need a laugh sometimes.

  13. sassenach says:

    How many ‘Curry Nights’ will it take to buy one poisoned chalice??

  14. Muscleguy says:

    I sincerely doubt that Anas can stop his mouth flapping long enough to kiss anything.

  15. Les Wilson says:

    Really brilliant Chris, first laugh of the morning! You are indeed the best.I can see the creepy resemblance too, funny enough, he is a creep anyway!

  16. Anas trying to remember if

    the pellet with the poison’s in the flagon with the dragon and has the vessel with the pestle the brew that is true.

    Fantastic artwork Chris,although the yoon gimp looks a bit young for his 50 odd years.


    hope everyone (including yoons) has a safe and happy day walking our new magnificent bridge and show the world that

    `Made in Scotland`

    still means highest quality engineering coupled with fantastic modern design guaranteed.

  17. Croompenstein says:

    Another list leader they can’t even get a leader directly voted in by the public… Pathetic

  18. Robert Peffers says:

    @mogabee says: 2 September, 2017 at 7:55 am:

    ” … But I have to wonder why you didn’t use a ring… “

    Mibbies ‘cis ye canna get a poisoned ring, mogabee.

  19. JaMur says:

    But will he get it? Such a talent pool to pick from.
    Spoiled for choices they/we are!

  20. jimnarlene says:

    Sup deeply, Anas. The end of SLab is nigh

  21. theMadMurph says:

    is that the chalice from the palace, the vessel with the pestle or the flagon with the dragon? No matter, they all have the pellet with poison when it comes to SLab!

  22. Stoker says:

    LOL The poisoned chalice!

    Branch Office Vacancies:
    Kelly for leader, Sarwar for Janny, or vice-versa.


    Have a great weekend Troops!

  23. Paul D says:

    If the talent pool in SLAB was any shallower, it would be condensation.

  24. Street Andrew says:

    I think that says it, Chris.

    Nothing for me to add. Glad to have you back, it makes it worth getting out of bed on a Saturday.

  25. Puzzled Puss says:

    Ban Anas!

  26. Fred says:

    A chalice for a chancer!

  27. Robert Peffers says:

    I was sitting here, thinking to myself this bonnie morn, when I suddenly had a wee flash of clarity among all the confusion that is the state of current British United Kingdom politics.

    If The Westminster unionist parties cannot trust their own, Scottish, “Accountancy Unit”, or their, Scottish “Branch Office”, to autonomously run their Westminster off-shoots in their Scottish dominion, why would any sensible electorate in Scotland trust them to run Scotland from Holyrood or to represent Scottish voters in the Westminster Establishment that imagines it actually runs Britain?

  28. Auld Rock says:

    Aye Street Andrew, I’ve even seen myself checking my emails at 03:00hrs just to see if Chris had been posted. Great to have him back. For me what I could never understand about the Sarwar family, they were so keen to be Independent from India and to have an Independent Pakistan yet are so set against their adopted country where they “prospered” becoming an Independent Sovereign State!!!

    Auld Rock

  29. Bob Mack says:

    Let it happen. Please,Please, please, let it happen.

  30. Abulhaq says:

    Do not get Mr Sarwar. South Asian ancestry, with all that nasty, imperialist British Raj historical baggage and he opposes Scottish independence. And for what, some delusion that ultra Unionist Labour is the true political qiblah. Balancing this logical inconsistency must disturb his sleep. Anwar and the Goblet of Mire indeed..

  31. Robert Peffers says:

    @Fergus Green says: 2 September, 2017 at 7:30 am:

    “It looks like everyone in Scottish Labour gets a chance at being branch manager for a year or so. Who will follow Anas next year?”

    Aye! Fergus but that is the function of a system of, “Buggin’s Turn”.

    Here is the dictionary definition of, “Buggin’s Turn”:-

    “noun – promotion by seniority or rotation rather than on merit

    The identity of the original Buggin or Buggins is obscure.”

  32. Iain says:

    Poor hapless Kezia was a gift to the SNP, and indeed to the tories. If nasty Sarwar is to be Labour’s annointed one, he will be too.

  33. Capella says:

    If we all say in chorus, “Oh no! Not Anas Sarwar!” then SLab will think we’re terrified of him and go ahead and vote for him.
    Tee hee.
    But it might be a double bluff.

    Keep up the good work, Chris.

  34. Truth says:

    The irony is he has done a lot to poison the chalice.

  35. gordoz says:

    The irresistible stench of the Labour Chalice ?

    You can just hear the soundtrack.

    ” It is your destiny! “

  36. gordoz says:

    ‘Raiders of the lost spark ?’

    Ok .. I’m going

  37. Jockanese Wind Talker says:

    Lets be honest the BLiS leadership gig is a wee pension top up.

    They all take turns in the top chair.

    They all take an increase in wages as the Scottish Branch Manager.

    Then they all have a juicy final salary pension at the expense of the mug taxpayer.

    How very Socialist


  38. crazycat says:

    @ BJ at 7.17

    Sarwar didn’t contest a constituency, which came in for a lot of criticism at the time, but was perhaps evidence of a tiny, temporary, flicker of self-awarness.

  39. geeo says:

    We are thinking this all wrong..

    Labour will pick Iain Gray of Jabba Baillie, then, when we ridicule them, labour will announce that “they are scared of the new leader, thats why they are attacking them”

    And as usual…they are wrong…we are just laughing.

  40. gordoz says:

    Now just what could be ‘steaming away’ in that bowl ?

    Equates to the soul of Labour methinks

  41. Grouse Beater says:

    A poisoned chalice right enough, Chris. Then again, “the chalice from the Palace holds the brew that is true”.

    The hubristic Sarwar thinks he can resurrect Labour in Scotland where all others have failed on a manifesto of England first, Scotland last.

    And he appears a man not keen on truth, preferring instead to spout nonsense or lies, whichever is believed by the faithful and the unwary. That will trip him up early. Incidentally, his speech delivery is garbled as well as his thinking. He chews his words before he spits them out.

    Your entertaining weekend reading:

    Salmond Unleashed:
    Salvation Achieved:
    Smart Thinking:

  42. auld highlander says:


    Another megalomaniac reaching out to grab the poisoned chalice,

    Never heard of him though.

  43. colin alexander says:


    Aye, it’s strange Mr Sarwar hasn’t joined the SNP, since the SNP became the Scottish Raj, administering colonial power for the British Govt.

    (Who knows, we could end up with Maharaja Sarwar ruling Scotland on behalf of his colonial rulers in London).

    The British Govt offered India devolution. The Indian National Congress told them no. We will be independent. (No indyref needed there).

    (Stu Campbell: Is India accepted as an independent country without an indyref? )

    FM Bute House, 13 March 2017:

    “These considerations lead me to the conclusion that if Scotland is to have a real choice – when the terms of Brexit are known, but before it is too late to choose our own course – then that choice must be offered between the autumn of next year, 2018, and the spring of 2019.”

    FM 27 June 2017:

    “So the challenge for all of us who believe that Scotland should be independent is to get on with the hard work of making and winning that case – on all of its merits – and in a way that is relevant to the changes, challenges, hopes and opportunities we face now and in the years ahead.

    That is what we will do.”
    “We will not seek to introduce the legislation for an independence referendum immediately.”

    “likely to be around next autumn – when the terms of Brexit will be clearer, we will come back to Parliament to set out our judgment on the best way forward at that time, including our view on the precise timescale for offering people a choice over the country’s future”.

    “We will set out afresh our vision for the country we lead, together with the creative, imaginative, bold and radical policies that, as far as is possible within the current powers available to us, will help us realise that bold, ambitious vision for Scotland.”

    The Mickey Mouse pretend parliament, that administers WM power for the British Govt, reconvenes on Monday, so I was just recapping where we are now.

  44. Dr Jim says:

    I tell you what let’s get the guy who couldn’t get anybody to vote for him and make him Branch Manager then when it goes wrong we can blame it on the previous one, what was her name again? for leaving us in the Doo Doo

    Naw! that’s what we did the last time wae Johann Lamont wae the stabby in the back thing and ended up wae that clown Murphy he’s how how we got the name Branch Office we’ll need to think of something else
    I thought Lamont was a wummin?…. Aye! whatever

    Aye but this guy’s an ethnic that’ll show we’re no racist or bigoted like the Tories
    Nah that’ll never work either this guy’s stupid as well although to be fair Labour voters will never notice that in between the garbage this guy motormouths out, he never shuts up

    Aye yer right sign him up

    Has anybody told Rowley? Naw leave him, he’s still readin the first paragraph of the rules for electin people, he’ll be there all day

  45. Jockanese Wind Talker says:

    ———————Thread Disruptor Alert———————–

    ——–Please ignore the Radge going on about the Raj————

    Message Ends——————————————————

  46. Proud Cybernat says:

    The British Nationalist parties are simply chalk-full of careerist ‘politicians’. They don’t actually give a shit about politics or people – to those MPs/MSPs of the British Nationalist parties in Scotland, being a ‘politician’ is just a nice wee earner; keeps their noses in the London trough and, god-willing, might even earn them a nice ermine cloak at the end of it all. Work for the benefit of their London masters in keeping Scotland a colony of Imperial Westminster and they will make a nice wee fortune for all their ‘hard work’. For the British Nationalist parties it’s all about the money and prestige – end of. All about their OWN personal wealth and to hang with the people of Scotland.

    For Scottish Nationalist MPs / MSPs it really is about making Scotland the best it can be for the benefit of all its people (aye, Yoons and Proud Scot buts included). It won’t always get things right first time but it does have the MINDSET right ALL the time.

    It’s that blindingly simple. Are you a colony or a country, Scotland?

    Excellent ‘toon, Chris, as ever.

  47. Calum McKay says:

    Fingers crossed!

    Let it be him!

  48. Dr Jim says:

    Today two airyplanes with lights on flew over the south coast of Inglind, thousands turned out to see them and it made the National news

    Meanwhile in Scotland the Unionists say shut up it’s just a bridge

    It’s on Spanish telly, those folks seem to think it’s a world leading achievement

    Funny that

  49. McBoxheid says:

    Apologies to J.R.R. Tolkien

    Three rings for the Highland fisherfolk under the sky,
    Seven for the Scottish farmers in their borders loam,
    Nine for Scottish Labour doomed to die,
    One for the Dark Lady on Her Dark Throne,
    In the palace of Westminster where the Tories lie.
    One ring to rule them all, one ring to find them
    One ring to bring them all and in the darkness bind them.
    In the palace of Westminster where the Tories lie.

  50. Proud Cybernat says:

    The MPs/MSPs of British Nationalist parties in Scotland like to call themselves ‘Unionists’, believing the 1707 political and economic Union between Scotland & England to be a good thing. At least, that’s what they say publicly. It’s certainly personally good for them.

    “Today we are equal partners in the United Kingdom… Today we can determine fiscal and monitory policy for the whole of the United Kingdom as we sit at the table as equals.” – Alistair Darling, 2012

    That’s what the British Nationalists really believe – that the Union between Scotland and England is a ‘Union of Equals’.

    If anyone truly believes that then they are quite simply delusional. England is the master and Scotland does as England tells it. The whole sorry saga of Brexit talks is true testament to that.

    In this great ‘equal Union’, Scotland is nothing more than a colony of the country of England. That’s not how the Union was sold but, in reality, that is what it has become. Scotland can only ever have equal status with England when it decolonises itself and, once again, becomes a sovereign state in its own right – just as it was for thousands of years before the 1707 Union.

    You were all pleased as proud Scot buts last night when your wee country, Scotland, won 3-0 at the footie. And this morning you are happy to enter back into your wee colony.

    Make your effing minds up. Colony or country?

  51. Johnny Farrell says:

    mogabee, I’m just guessing that CC didn’t use a ring because he’s already got an arse in there.

  52. GrahamB says:

    I’ve seen Sarwar arrogantly strolling about Glasgow several times but I was shocked when I saw him at the Council Elections count in May. There were two Labour factions lording it in their £1200 suits and red silk ties – McAveety’s Mafia and Sarwar’s Mafia.
    At the risk of appearing racist, Sarwar’s mob were uniformly well-off asians from Glasgow’s South Side, completely different class from the Scottish-Asians we interact with on our side of the city. ‘Ours’ are the wee shopkeepers who work 16 hour days, health service workers and the like who are are almost universally SNP supporters while Sarwar’s Mafia are the big warehouse owners who send their children to fee-paying schools. Not a fag paper between them and Tories, both driven by greed and self-aggrandisment.

  53. Dan Huil says:

    Britnats would love to see Scotland partaking in xenophobic British nationalism. It’s not going to happen. Britnats are quaiching in their boots.

  54. donnywho says:

    Just watched a clip of the BBC coverage of the Bridge. They stated the Bridge was a Year late and on Budget.

    In fact it had been a year ahead at one point and then slipped back to its original opening date of July/August 2017… Arguably a couple of weeks late.

    But the on Budget statement is somewhat odd even by BBC accounting practices. They seem to have misplaced a Quarter of a Billion Pounds… Whoops an under-spend of £245 Million on a project that was already less than half the price of the original PFI unionist Bridge @ £4 Billion.

    No deceit is too small, no Lie goes untold, No good goes reported.

    This is the BEEB in Scotland today!

  55. Proud Cybernat says:


    My better half is a member of the SNP (I’m not – prefer to be a man o’ independent mind and all that).

    Anyways – she received her membership renewal. A5-sized envelope with a curious wee Royal Mail sticky on it: “Could not deliver due to controlled entry”. Obviously this was the second (or third) attempt to deliver and they managed to get it delivered.

    This has happened before – once or twice in the 10 or so years we’ve lived at this address. What’s odd is that they always manage to get the junk mail, leccy & gas bills, factors and council tax bills delivered no problem.

    Then I realised the envelope had a big SNP logo printed on it. “Hmmm…” I thought.

    SNP take note – perhaps time to stop branding your envelopes as you might then find they are delivered much more promptly by HM’s Royal Mail and that your revenue will not be affected as much.

    Okay – tin foil hat now placed back in cupboard.

  56. Breeks says:

    Labour could elect that tub of lard which replaced Roy Hattersley on Have I Got News For You as leader of Scottish Labour, and it wouldn’t make the slightest difference to their regular airtime on TV and the uncritical dissection of their policies, gaffes, hypocrisy and U-turns.

    Labour and the Tories are the UK Establishment, and both Scottish Labour and Scottish Conservatives are merely the flunkies of the UK Establishment; a type of placebo for Scottish voters to maintain the double illusion that Scottish democracy is respected, and that the Establishment has a democratic mandate to govern Scotland.

    By the same token, the YES movement and the SNP can slaughter both Scottish Labour and Scottish Conservatives at the polls and do it with their eyes closed, yet achieve nothing more lasting or rewarding than the feel good satisfaction of terrier harrying the bejesus out of a stuffed toy.

    For every whack-a-mole leader the SNP defeats, there’s another faceless, plasticine, Toom Tabard figurehead waiting in the wings to carry the torch for the grand ol’ UK Establishment. We had better hope the SNP doesn’t run out of steam, because the Unionist machinery has an endless production line of vacuous, spineless opportunists all waving their tickets for the gravy train, and sadly, we have an Independence movement that seems depressingly content with its ambition to be nothing greater than World Champions at whack-a-mole.

    As a country which, I’m told, wants to be Independent, there are a whole bunch of us who just aren’t seeing the rabbit, while the rest of us who can see it, just see it’s arse disappearing down a big black hole.

  57. ClanDonald says:

    Wonder what Corbynista Cat & Co will think of a privately educated son of a millionaire who sends his own kids to private school being installed in their beloved Corbyn’s branch office. Hope it happens just so we can remind them of it every single day!

  58. Petra says:

    Don’t tell me that Labour supporters are going to be duped again!


    “Bedroom Tax” vote.

    In 2013, Sarwar took a strong line in attacking both the “Bedroom Tax” and the Scottish Government for its failure to mitigate its worst effects.

    However, during a vote on its repeal in the House of Commons on 13 November 2013, Sarwar had abstained, causing outrage amongst Scottish nationalists.

    It subsequently emerged that on the day of the vote, Anas Sarwar was in Pakistan, giving a speech to students at Hajvery University, and so was paired off with a Conservative MP, cancelling out the two votes.’




  59. Graf Midgehunter says:

    This poisoned chalice of chinese tin
    Anas sups of the shite within…

    This nectar of which sweet dreams are born
    doth roam the night, the coming dawn.

    But alas to awaken, the day is nigh
    the grip of fear out loud doth cry

    Was it the poison or just cheap booze
    for now is the day of FMQs…

    The poisoned chalice is not the Holy Grail. 🙂

  60. Foonurt says:

    Ah wee hauf, wull soart yoan Scoattish NHS.

    Bit haud oan, ah meenit. Ah huvnae, ma rid, tory tie oan.

    Raw erse, Anas.

  61. Valerie says:

    Love it, Chris, your depiction of Sarwar is so good.

    Loving the poems, guys, risking the Rev’s wrath, lol.

    See Chris, you give inspiration to the movement!

  62. Meg merrilees says:

    Slightly O/T

    What a braw day for those walking o’er the bridge. Hopefully a few drams will be consumed and maybe even sprinkled on the tarmac…

    Great cartoon Chris – hope you had a great holiday.

  63. Chick McGregor says:

    If he is daft enough to take it, it won’t be long before we get to sing this little ditty.

    “Who’s Sarwar Now”

    Who’s Sarwar now
    Who’s Sarwar now
    Who’s heart is aching for breaking each vow
    Who’s sad and blue
    Who’s crying too
    Just like I cried over you

    Right to the end
    Just like a friend
    I tried to warn you somehow
    You had your way
    Now you must pay
    I’m glad that you’re Sarwar now

  64. Jack Murphy says:

    Re Anas Sarwar.
    Here is Mr Sarwar a couple of years ago as reported in The Herald:
    “Ousted MP Anas Sarwar throwing banquet for scores of Scottish Labour faithful”.

    “FORMER Scottish Labour deputy leader Anas Sarwar has unnerved his colleagues after booking out a 500-seater venue with an offer of free dinner to set out his vision for the party.

    In the clear first move of his anticipated political comeback, Mr Sarwar, who lost his Glasgow Central Westminster seat in May, has contacted parliamentarians, councillors and activists with an invite to hear his “view on the future of the Labour Party and Scotland”……….”

    These Blairites certainly know how to do things in style.

    The Herald Archived

  65. Tinto Chiel says:

    I have to say, Chris, that you’ve caught his glaikit, slack-jawed puss perfectly.

  66. twathater says:

    Great toon Chris and brill comments , Dr Jim you should be writing scripts for the Brutish Bullshitting Cabal on Not The News anywhere , yours are jimtastic

  67. Robert J. Sutherland says:

    Captures the essence excellently, Chris.

    I can’t recall how many times I have seen the phrase “poisoned chalice” in the last few days, so I did a quick Google search just now for that term plus Scotland and Labour and got…

    …”about 34,100 results”!

    Makes you wonder where all that success that Section 9 manager and the Messiah supposedly brought to the Party in Scotland has gone…

  68. Rock says:

    Labour desperately needs money and Anas’s “foreigner” dad has a lot of money.

  69. Reluctant Nationalist says:

    Nice cartoon, shame about the title. ‘The Govan Gambit’, or ‘The Pollokshields Protocol’ would be more sardonic.

  70. defo says:

    Did that elephant hiding in the room just say something ?

  71. Hamish100 says:

    Wasn’t his father a patriotic Britisher and labour man but turned out to be a right wing non Britisher tearing up his passport so he could hold power in Pakistani. Didn’t quite work out., oh the arrogance

  72. stonefree says:

    @ Hamish100 12:04 am

    Did Daddy Sarwar not give up his UK citizenship into the bargain ?
    If that’s the case is he now an illegal

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