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Ball Of Confusion

Posted on June 05, 2025 by

We must admit, we don’t quite get what the Daily Record is trying to achieve.

Having already told its dwindling band of readers that voting for both the SNP and Labour is the only way to stop Reform in today’s Hamilton by-election, for the last two days it’s deployed some random loony in a hard hat and the vegan former Rangers captain Graeme Souness to the same ostensible end.

Souness, famously a supporter of Margaret Thatcher and the Conservatives, tells Record readers today that they must vote Labour in order to prevent Thatcher’s right-wing heirs from winning the seat – even though Labour are dead, plucked, stuffed and cooked geese in the eyes of the bookmakers and voting for them only increases the chances of both Reform AND the SNP.

We can only guess that the Record thinks Souness’ history with Rangers will sway Unionist punters in the Larkhall part of the constituency, to whom voting SNP would presumably be unthinkable, and thinks that those people are too stupid to realise that Labour have no chance and backing them is a wasted vote.

If there’s anyone in Hamilton, Larkhall and Stonehouse who hates the SNP more than Reform, their best course of action is voting Reform, and vice versa. There’s also a pretty good chance that anyone even considering voting Reform would, more or less by definition, probably answer “Yes” to the question on the first of those two covers.

The Record’s sales are pretty feeble these days, of course. With just 42,000 copies a day shifted in the whole of Scotland it can’t be selling more than a few hundred max in the constituency, which has around 60,000 registered voters. So the chances are that its influence will be negligible.

But while the SNP remain hot odds-on favourites, there’s enough uncertainty around the result that even a few hundred votes COULD make a difference, and in the event that Reform do manage to pull off an unlikely shock they might just have the paper’s bewildered readers to thank.

0 to “Ball Of Confusion”

  1. sarah says:

    Don’t purdah rules apply to Holyrood elections?

    Or are all votes in Scotland free of purdah rules, as in 2014 with the Vow?

    Reply
    • Aidan says:

      Purdah doesn’t mean that media organisations have to remain politically neutral in the run up to an election. It just means that governmental bodies are restricted from making announcements in that period.

      Reply
      • PhilM says:

        Perhaps we need to petition the parliament to consider legislation to ban Graeme Souness and anyone with a similar bubble perm and ‘tache past from misusing their Brookside glamour to bewitch voters of a certain age.

  2. Mark Beggan says:

    Souness used to be called something else if I remember correctly. It rhymes with meaness but begins with a P.

    Reply
  3. Cuphook says:

    By the weekend we’ll see articles from the usual guardians of the discourse likening the SNP and Reform and denouncing all forms of nationalism in the name of British patriotism.

    Reply
  4. agent x says:

    We will know the result in the morning. Will be interesting.

    Reply
    • sarah says:

      If a very low turnout we might know the result before 11.00 tonight!

      Reply
  5. Skip_NC says:

    You’re just trolling “Jammies” Kelly now, aren’t you, Stu? The paragraph that begins “If there’s anyone in Hamilton…,” is just inviting him to bang on about how you are a unionist Reform supporter.

    You’re not, are you?

    Reply
  6. twathater says:

    I think the daily rectum is going for a reverse psychological position to voters, denigrate the man whilst shoving his clown face right into a voters deepest thoughts

    Reply
  7. David says:

    The Protestants of Larkhall need something to cheer about tonight. They’ve just hired Russell Martin – a vegan Buddhist footballer manager – that can’t win football matches.

    Tell them where to go boys. You want a team of Protestant men. And your country back!

    Reply
  8. TURABDIN says:

    THE ANAGRAM of REFORM is former, i.e belonging to an earlier time. just like its supporters.

    Reply
    • Hatey McHateface says:

      A lot of things were better in earlier times, TURABDIN.

      Heck, take the Yes movement. Who wouldn’t want to go back to June 2014 in a heartbeat?

      Reply
  9. Chris Downie says:

    Souness was a world-class player, but also the biggest hacking bastard the Scottish game has ever seen. A true Loyalist caricature for sure, but interesting to see him revert to the Unionist tactical voting of the last decade, that sees diehard Tories like him holding their nose and vote Labour.

    Despite their irrelevance though, I’d like to see more people (including the Rev) hold the rag to account for its U-turn since 2016, where it’s acknowledged on several occasions that the Scottish government “has every right to ask the independence question again, in light of Brexit”, to being silent when said referendum has been blocked, first by successive Tory governments and now by their beloved Labour.

    Reply
  10. Big Jock says:

    Didn’t Souness say he wished he was English? Surely Farage should be a natural home for this plastic Jock. Him and that other fanny MCCoist should have their caps taken off them.

    Reply
    • Chris Downie says:

      I don’t know of any interview where he said that specifically, but I have no reason to believe it’s not true. After all, he was/is an avowed Thatcherite when he managed the deceased diseased club, which equates to being a self-hating Scot.

      Reply
  11. Willie says:

    The Hamilton by-election result is now out and unpopular as Labour are they have won with the SNP second and Reform close behind in third place.

    In detail Labour’s Davy Russell secured 8,559 votes, ahead of the SNP’s Katy Loudon on 7,957 and Ross Lambie of Reform on 7,088.

    Now I know this was a by-election, that it was a low voter turn out,but this is most certainly a message to the SNP and it couldn’t be clearer.

    This was an SNP seat and they lost. Folks no longer trust the SNP.

    No doubt as the day wears on wears on the great and good will pronounce on what the result means But thecone thing that is clear is that whatever way you odds it the SNP have been given the message.

    The people no longer trust them.

    Reply
  12. Rob says:

    Politics has been reduced to voting for the party that you least hate.
    Reform will do better and better in that environment because they appeal to several things that the other parties try to keep away from and not have a policy.
    Since they have no record of failing in government compared to the other main parties I think a lot of folk are simply sticking two fingers up at the main parties and thinking that reform couldn’t do worse, not that the couldn’t but it yet to be proved.
    The only way that the SNP and Labour are going to beat reform is to actually address the couple of policies they stand for and they will collapse, however I think I saw a pig flying past the windown……….

    Reply
  13. Young Lochinvar says:

    Aaaah Souness!

    Wasn’t he the highly paid sports monkey that said Scotland back in the day should throw the match against U, which of course happened anyway.

    Don’t seem to recall any similar calls within a week or so when Wales hammered U.

    Souness; the archetype “house Jock” for London.

    And ps; I thought he was a repetitive p1sh poor player; iguanadon thumbs up t0ssing about the field spitting doing the square route of eff all..

    IMO that is of course 🙂

    F8nny.

    Reply


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