The world's most-read Scottish politics website

Wings Over Scotland


Pornbot haikus

Posted on December 11, 2012 by

I always like to try to salvage something of value out of the most worthless commodity of the digital age: spam. Most of the cast of characters in Hell Yeah! are named after the "senders" of spam emails, and earlier today I was going through the followers on the Twitter account of my Scottish politics site blocking all the pornbots and noticed a slightly odd shared characteristic in the process.

Almost every one had a single-word biog, and as I went down the list it seemed to have a certain poetry. I had just enough syllables to make two haikus (plus titles), with four left over. If you can do better with the words, send 'em in.

 

HAIKU 1: "stone father"

prison boy bent down
soap day condition: fight time
cork invention sweet

HAIKU 2: "sugar dust"

stocking grain, tongue throat
thin political insect
plough that straight sister

 

spare words

plane
way
match
than

 

(Haiku 2 is for Germaine Greer.) Make me proud, readers.

0 to “Pornbot haikus”

  1. asdasd says:

    "political"

    stocking dust insect
    tongue sugar sweet: that day, time
    thin grain condition
     
    "fight"

    father bent way down
    soap, cork, stone: throat invention
    plough. plane. straight. match time.
     
    The first one isn't so much political as it is topical. Even then it isn't timely.

    Reply


Comment - please read this page for comment rules. HTML tags like <i> and <b> are permitted. Use paragraph breaks in long comments. DO NOT SIGN YOUR COMMENTS, either with a name or a slogan. If your comment does not appear immediately, DO NOT REPOST IT. Ignore these rules and I WILL KILL YOU WITH HAMMERS.


  • About

    Wings Over Scotland is a thing that exists.

    Stats: 6,778 Posts, 1,220,196 Comments

  • Recent Posts

  • Archives

  • Categories

  • Tags

  • Recent Comments

    • Insider on Holiday Relief: “Nah ! Elvis Presley is the one we need to shake things up !Jun 18, 15:21
    • Hatey McHateface on Holiday Relief: ““Scotland should reconsider … the Scottish Crown” Seconded. Let’s hear your ideas for the new Kingdom of Scotland. Shame that…Jun 18, 15:19
    • James Cheyne on Holiday Relief: “We must never allow the Snp and other political parties in the devolved Scottish parliament to make that parliament the…Jun 18, 15:17
    • Hatey McHateface on Holiday Relief: “Nah. I understand where you’re coming from, but there’s too much of the gammon about her.Jun 18, 15:12
    • Insider on Holiday Relief: “sam… What an odd thing to wonder about !Jun 18, 14:57
    • James Cheyne on Holiday Relief: “Unfortunately that conversation we held with the SNP member in 2015 let us realise that the SNPs agenda was, for…Jun 18, 14:57
    • James Cheyne on Holiday Relief: “If we have no care here in Scotland to hold to account the 1707 treaty of union articles, terms and…Jun 18, 14:32
    • James Cheyne on Holiday Relief: “The Scottish devolved-government from Westminster under the crown of England cannot pass Scots Laws. And the first minster nor those…Jun 18, 14:20
    • James Cheyne on Holiday Relief: “Swinney’s version of a future Scotland is continued Colonisation for nothing in his ideology suggests consultation of the people in…Jun 18, 14:07
    • McDuff on Holiday Relief: “Rob my choice would be Peppa Pig who has a lot more voter appeal and is certainly brighter than any…Jun 18, 14:07
    • Hatey McHateface on Holiday Relief: ““certain other seemingly pro-indy intellectuals within the movement” Would this be a good opportunity to deploy “goitrous”? I can’t remember…Jun 18, 13:32
    • Hatey McHateface on Let’s Not Make Some Plans: “Here’s a Kleenex, James. Clean yourself up, there’s a good chap, afore yer mammie comes back.Jun 18, 13:25
    • Hatey McHateface on Holiday Relief: ““the union is a hoax and that Scotland is essentially a colony and the Scots an oppressed people” Haud oan…Jun 18, 13:22
    • Robinov Cybernat on Holiday Relief: “Right now, I’m reckoning they could replace Honest John Swinney with Steven Pressley and they would definitely be getting someone…Jun 18, 12:58
    • Captain Caveman on Let’s Not Make Some Plans: “Ah, another trademark valued contribution to the site from our corpulent wastrel friend. I’ve crying rivers here, Chief. Keep your…Jun 18, 12:44
    • Chas on Holiday Relief: “Maybe Robin realises it is all a load of shite. Unlike the fantasists on here!Jun 18, 12:25
    • James on Let’s Not Make Some Plans: “Behold: the language of the [Site] Prick!Jun 18, 12:20
    • lothianlad on Holiday Relief: “Surely the SNP members will start to see they are being lied to!? its taking them lomng enough!Jun 18, 12:17
    • James on Let’s Not Make Some Plans: “Welcome back, Northcode! Yes indeed they are becoming much bolder.Jun 18, 12:16
    • James on Let’s Not Make Some Plans: “Go easy on her, YL, she was a “captain” – of industry ROTFL. And the Site Prick “P3nisbreath McP3nisbreathface”… LOLZJun 18, 12:11
    • sam on Holiday Relief: “I wonder if Alf will be at Holyrood tomorrow, meeting 12.15, to protest and meet FH with regard to ferries…Jun 18, 11:38
    • Northcode on Holiday Relief: ““…completely missed the big news for the independence movement…” It seems unlikely McAlpine missed the news of the Liberation.Scot petition…Jun 18, 11:37
    • Aidan on Holiday Relief: “Perhaps Robin is aware that the highly vaunted “approach to the UN” has been completely rebuffed at the first hurdle?…Jun 18, 11:27
    • sarah on Holiday Relief: “That is interesting, Alf. I generally agree with what Robin says and I hadn’t noticed theses striking omissions. Can someone…Jun 18, 10:58
    • Alf Baird on Holiday Relief: “A daeless Swinney and his hot-air speechwriter seems an easy target, however Robin and certain other seemingly pro-indy intellectuals within…Jun 18, 10:06
    • Sven on Holiday Relief: “Crazycat @ 23.12. I believe that policy was effectively jettisioned back in 2015 when Ms Sturgeon forced the then PM…Jun 18, 09:02
    • Hatey McHateface on Let’s Not Make Some Plans: ““roll back over and cosy up with yer new “bestie” P3nisbreath McP3nisbreathface..” Aw naw! Signature double-tap there from Wings’ only…Jun 18, 08:24
    • Callum on Holiday Relief: “‘The world’s most embarrassing relaunch’ by Robin McAlpine | 16 Jun 2025 “So anyway, we have learned loads here. Mainly…Jun 18, 08:22
    • Sven on Holiday Relief: “Off Topic; Hardly surprising that our SNP led devolved administration (was never a government) have declined to have an inquiry…Jun 18, 08:21
    • Captain Caveman on Let’s Not Make Some Plans: “Heh! Gone “fishing” have we YL? About the only thing you’ll catch (in your piss-stained shoes) is an empty bottle…Jun 18, 07:55
  • A tall tale



↑ Top