Almost a year ago we ran a short piece mocking a Scotsman headline which claimed that “THOUSANDS” of people had signed a Tory anti-referendum petition, when the actual number was a strictly-accurate-but-pathetic TWO thousand.
We didn’t think that could ever be beaten for technically-true hyperbolic exaggeration, but we’d reckoned without the bold boundary-pushing ingenuity of the Daily Express.
Hundreds of thousands? How many hundreds, exactly?
Oh. Oh dear. That’s embarrassing.
The actual number of “hundreds of thousands” that were spent on the case isn’t even one and a half, let alone two. It’s actually LESS than 1.4 – if you were rounding it off to the nearest whole number it’d be one.
And it’s actually even worse than that.
We hate to break it to the Express, but £128,877 plus £800 isn’t £136,000.
That one, it turns out, is just a typo. We checked with some grown-up news sources and the actual figure seems to be £7,541 for the extra costs, which the paper has rounded it up by a few hundred quid and then divided by ten while writing it down, possibly because its ham-fisted hack was already confused and tired from having to hold down the Shift button for the headline, or clap and bark for fish while honking a bicycle horn with his snout.
The new ABC circulation figures for Scottish newspapers are in the process of being released today and tomorrow. We’ll let you know how many hundreds the Express has fallen by, but we’re pretty sure that one WILL be a proper plural.